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11 Children Removed From Texas Home: Who Is to Blame?

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How well do you know your neighbors? Would you know if seven separate families lived in one home? Would you know if they tied their children to beds during naptime? Would you be totally caught off guard if 11 children were removed by Child Protective Services from a home on your street? It happened in Dayton, Texas, and neighbors were surprised.

I'm a nosy neighbor, I'll admit it. I know every car that comes and goes on our dead-end, private street. If something looks suspicious, I'll take down the license plate. If you try to run drugs or I suspect you of child abuse, I will make the appropriate calls. I have done it and I would do it again. Not just because I want a calm, quiet street for my own family, but because I feel that when children are involved, we should all be paying attention.

I'm not saying that we need to start calling CPS on our neighbors when they yell at their children for not coming inside for dinner the first three times they were called. I'm not saying we need to call the police just because eight cars are sitting in the neighbor's driveway. I am saying that not noticing something as grievous as what is reported to have happened in Dayton is letting down the children, our future.

It's not just the neighbors here who didn't seem to be as concerned. The home in question is reported to have had other calls to CPS on this address over the years. Police were called by a neighbor with a noise report. A man claiming to be a father of one of the children in the home says he "didn't see anything wrong with the house" on a visit. There were children not -- perhaps never -- enrolled in school. There was a stolen car; there were teenage runaways. Then there's the widely reported fact that a sex offender used the home as his address. This looks like system fail after system fail after system fail.

And, of course, there are the ten adults in this home who, according to the report by the police and Child Protective Services, saw nothing wrong with any of what they were doing.

That, of course, is the main problem: people who see nothing wrong with tying a child to a bed during naptime. The blame, the fault, the whole mess belongs on the heads of these individuals who, if the charges are true, didn't cherish these children, didn't parent these children. They should be responsible and they should pay the consequences. They're probably lucky that the legal system is in charge of what happens to them, because I'm sure a number of people who champion for children would rather see these adults tied to beds.

But I suspect there are other people who are feeling that they failed these children -- for not noticing, for not reporting, for not taking reports seriously, for not following up properly, for not putting children first. I'm sure there are some heavy hearts and consciences, some people wondering if they did all they could, if they should have done more. I hope they're able to forgive themselves -- but I also hope that they won't hesitate if, God forbid, something like this crosses their paths again.

Would you have noticed? Would you have called? Or do you take the path of "well, it's not my business," when it comes to neighbors and their families? Where's the line and how should we toe it?

 

Family Section Editor Jenna Hatfield (@FireMom) blogs at Stop, Drop and Blog and The Chronicles of Munchkin Land. She is an editor, writer and photographer.

Photo Credit: nathanrussell.

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Emily@SAHM.i.AM 29 pts

I like to think I would notice. But I don't know our neighbors very well. Everyone tends to drive straight into their garages and stay inside. We wave when we see people but people tend to be private. Like I said, I'd like to think I'd notice. In previous living situations I've called the police for domestic violence (two times, different neighbors) but there weren't any children involved. This story is so sad...it's difficult to know what happened in this situation. It appears that the system failed in some ways...but it's easy to blame the system too. My mother used to work for CPS and it was a tough job. Sometimes their hands were tied and they wished they could do more but they had to wait. At the same time, if a sex offender was at the address...it's just so frustrating. Those poor children.

imnotasupermom 11 pts

That's just awful. We often never know what goes on behind "closed doors" and yes, hindsight is always 20/20, but I would have to say that having 11 children and that many adults living there with none of them leaving for school,playing with other children and possibly a lot of odd activity, etc should have raised some concerns. It's possible that the past problems where CPS was called may have been called in by the neighbors, but it sounds like not much was done by the agency till now. Of course I'm sure there are details we are not aware of.

It's just so, so sad. Heartbreaking.

amlindsey 12 pts

I've thought about this a lot, because as a child care provider, I'm actually legally bound to report any child abuse I see anywhere, not just while I"m "on duty." The conclusion I've come to is that, having spent so much time with children, I know when something is not ok. And if I turn out to be wrong, I guess I'll use the paper I signed promising to report abuse as an excuse for being a bit over-cautious. Thank goodness I haven't had to report anything, yet. I did wish I could call someone about the neighbor who smoked like a chimney throughout her pregnancy, to get her some help with some clear mental issues more than anything else, but I couldn't. The baby spend a month in the NICU and I haven't seen them leave their apartment since. Other than that, I've been lucky enough to only interact with families who respect their children's human rights.

LadyAnne 28 pts

I don't know if I would notice. I live in an apartment, and while I recognize everyone who lives in my building, I don't know that I would notice if there were 10 adults in one apartment. I do know all of the kids, only because there are only 2 in the whole building. But again, I see the kids on their way to and from school, so if they weren't enrolled in school and never left, I don't know if I would notice. I think apartment living is a little different in that regard. But I definitely wouldn't hesitate to make a phone call if I thought there was something suspicious going on - and I've called before about suspicious cars.

It sounds like that house should have been shooting up all kinds of red flags for the neighbors. Even if no one knew there were kids there, I would have been on the phone with the police about all the cars and people coming and going. I guess I fall into the "nosey neighbor" category.

victorias_view 2275 pts moderator

We know everyone on our little street and with the community league you get to know many of your neighbors for better or worse. Our children also play with most of the kids on the street. I have been known to make calls in the past about suspicious vehicles in the area. Also, if I had any knowledge of children involved in harms way I would not hesitate to pick up the phone.

KarenLynnn 1105 pts

I would never know -there arent many children in our subdivision and our kids are grown. We know the neighbors that are like us-baby boomers. When my kids were little and throughout their teenage life, I knew everyone on the block with kids. it doesn't sound like they let the kids out much for anyone to notice, no school and I bet no doctor visits either. Scary scary stuff :(