The 5 Life Rules for Handling Change


Chill, baby!

Chill, baby!

Over the last few weeks I’ve been migrating this blog to a self-hosted website and that is where we are right now. Welcome to the new site.

Ta Da! (she said with very little fanfare). 

OK, it’s true, things are not all that different on the outside, but inside everything is new. That’s typically how change happens. We don’t always see change right away which sometimes makes us wonder if it’s worth the trouble. In fact getting here was such a pain the ass that I almost abandoned the project altogether. Screw change.

But I am told by much wiser people that I will be happier having more control over my content (look, Mom, no ads!). I am sure they are right. And that is why I spent the last few weeks fighting with servers, uploads, downloads, uncooperative HTML, plugins, and widgets. I amhigh on control if not completely lost in the world of code.

Things here are not yet as I want them–links need to be fixed, missing images need to be reloaded, I’m missing an email subscription option entirely, etc.–but I’ll get there…eventually.

I’ll get there because I know The 5 Life Rules for Handling Change:

KM 5 Life Rules

  1. Trust your instincts. They won’t always be right but they will lead you to what comes next. 
    I spent two days staring at the same screen without doing a thing because I was terrified if I hit enter I would accidentally delete my blog entirely. My instincts were fear-blocked. Once I hit enter everything fell into place…mostly. At the very least I was moving forward again.
  2. Use the help that is available. It’s not a trap. You won’t be judged. 
    Talk to my friends and family and they will tell you I’m not big on asking for or accepting help. It’s me, not you. But sometimes you just have to let go. I mean they put that HELP button there for a reason. If I could buy“Jerry” the Help Chat Guy a drink I would. He earned it.
  3. Sleep. Chill. Relax. When all else fails a good night’s sleep will clear your head.
    When I write I have to walk away from the pages for a while before I can see what is and isn’t working. Turns out web manipulation isn’t all that different. My guess is life in general comes easier when you take a moment or two before making some decisions.
  4. Save caffeine for when you really need it. Being in a constant state of intensity doesn’t mean you’re getting things done.
    I’m not a coffee drinker. I’m not kidding. No, really! I do however enjoy a hit of caffeine from time to time. But to take full advantage of the caffeine rush I drink my caffeine–either carbonated or steeped–only when I feel like I can’t make it over that imperative last hill without it. We’re talking weekly, not daily. (By the way, feel free to replace the word caffeine with whatever word represents your preferred stimulant. For example, Peanut M&Ms or an episode of Dr. Who or a little C-SPAN–everyone has their vice.)
  5. Imperfect is as good as it gets. Show me perfect and I’ll show you a liar.
    This blog has glitches. It has errors. It has code out of place. But it’s good enough. It’s a place to start. If I waited for it to be perfect before I went live I’d never get it done. I’ll tweak it, change it, move things around, and adapt it as I go. Forever imperfect is better than forever undone.   

And that is how we got here. What’s next?

K.M. (Kelly) O’Sullivan is a writer, blogger, and unapologetic feminist mother living in the Midwest with her husband, their three boys, and the cats. She isn’t afraid of the feminist label but could do without the phrase “real women”. Kelly writes about parenting, politics, feminism, body image, and more. Read more from Kelly at and connect with her on Facebook (K.M. O'Sullivan - Slightly Askew Woman) and on Twitter (

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