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It’s funny; when you are older, the fact that someone was two grades ahead of you in high school or is 10 years older, scarcely matters. In the teenage and even the college years, the difference of a few grade levels could make you grumble with anger when, say, you have to let your younger sister hang out with you and your friends.I The same separation of a few years could make you froth with anticipation when, say, an upperclassman notices you.
I remember eagerly counting down months and years when I was younger to get to those signature ages when I could do whatever it was I’d been restricted from doing. Some seem so innocuous now but some were, and still are enforced. Here’s my list:
Rites of Passage that don’t exist any more (but that I endured!)
Wearing my first sheer stockings and pumps (dress-up shoes with tiny heels). My mother said I had to wait until I was 13, an official teenager before I could wear stockings and pumps and then only on Sundays to church or for special occasions. (I can still remember my anger when, only a few months later, my sister who was younger by 22 months was allowed to wear stockings and pumps. Thus began a pattern where I, older sister, would follow the rules only to have them passed over by younger sis.)
Singing in the Intermediate Choir. The Intermediate Choir was the choir between the Children’s Choir and the Adult Choir, in other words – teenagers. As now, teenagers were happening and as soon as one became a teenager, one wanted to do teenage things. Despite becoming a teenager in June, I had to petition to get permission to officially cross over.
Changing my coiffure from pigtails or pony-tails to a flip like the one worn by Marlo Thomas on her sitcom, That Girl. I rolled my hair faithfully every night so my flip would last all day.
Wearing Makeup - I don't think I was ever officially allowed to wear make-up. (I snuck and wore it to school beginning in high school making sure to wash it off before I got home. Don't tell my mother, please.)
Wearing Black – I wasn’t allowed to wear a Black dress until I was out of high school. (Now Black clothes are sold for all age levels, including infants. I’ve bought some for my granddaughter myself.)
Getting a Social Security # - I remember my Mom sitting my sister and me down to fill out the applications for our SS#s when we were teenagers. Now, parents get SS#s for children soon after birth, otherwise they don’t exist in the eyes of the IRS. (No one wants to jeopardize a tax-deduction these days!)
Getting my ears pierced – My Mom pierced me and my sister’s ears at home using a sterilized needle and thread, later replaced by a short straw burned at both ends until we got gold hoops. This was done according to tradition and the sign of the moon when we were starting elementary school. Now many children’s ears are pierced within the first year of life and that includes some boys as well as girls.
Being allowed to have boy company – This was a biggie! Other than close cousins, my sister and I were not allowed any boy company until my father deemed us ready. For me, this happened when I was age 15. It was a big deal. The boy’s name has passed from memory but he went to Soldan High and he had to endure my father’s questions. For most of the visit my father sat in the living room with us, leaving us alone for maybe ½ hour. Having boy company was not the same as going out on a first date. That didn't come until my senior year of high school!
On the blog, Mommy Life, Barbara Curtis shares “Dads: Rules for Dating My Daughter”. The first part has a form that a prospective date must fill out, “For Permission to Date My Daughter.” It includes essay questions such as: In 50 words or less, what does 'LATE' mean to you? It is followed by a list of Daddy’s Rules for Dating:
Rule One:
If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.
(For my brother and male cousins, their
