I'm clumsy. It's a fact I've tried to hide unsuccessfully for a number of years. I think my first clue that I wouldn't succeed was my sophomore year of high school where I collided with a metal door in the hallway  while trying to seduce my crush. Somehow I don't think he thought it was too sexy that I landed on my arse.

Since that humiliating experience I've taken care to walk slower and try to pay attention to potential hazards in my way. This unfortunately doesn't always work. Like yesterday.

As I mentioned in my "About Me" section, I'm a teller. When we wait on customers, we're expected to stand. However, when the branch is empty we're allowed to sit in these nifty little spinning seats that are a little higher than regular chairs but not quite the height of a bar stool. They're blue. Are you visualizing? Uh huh. Very good, I knew you would.

So. I have a customer. I stand. I nudge the chair slightly out of my cube. I process his transaction. Then I realize that lo and behold I don't have enough pennies in my coin tray to give him his change. Aha! I must get a roll of pennies out of my coin vault, located at the bottom of a set of three drawers. This requires me to squat [always hot] and spin a three part combo to retrieve the needed pennies. I was a little aflutter already because thinking I was being clever, I had been joking with the customer. However, he wasn't a joker. He just stared at me like "why is this babbling idiot speaking to me!?!?" So I was feelilng the need to get him out of my space as quickly and effectively as possible. So I started to bend down to get to my coin vault. Do you remember how earlier I had nudged my blue, spinning, not-quite-bar-stool-height chair out of my cube? Well, my trusty hips didn't nudge quite far enough. The result: when I began to bend down, my butt hit the chair, which caused me to launch forward and slam my head into my drawer.

So hot, I know.

The look on this man's face was enough to melt ice. I couldn't give him his change fast enough. I'm pretty sure I saw him running while leaving the branch. He just wanted OUT.

I'm currently organizing donations for bubble wrap to strap on myself. There must be a solution!