Excellent post. Thank you .I think I'll check and see if the library has that book.

 I'm currently dealing w/ Alzheimers with my Grandmother. It's been decided that she needs to go live in a facility (on a locked ward) and I have tremendous guilt over this. I can't help but feel that I should be caring for her. My Grandma raised me until I was 12 and went to live full time with my mother. I feel like I owe her,I guess and that I'm failing her. Guilt and helplessness...those are the themes that run through Alzheimers from my perspective.

Hi, i´m a psychology student here in Brazil,i´ve being learning about the dementia and i have some close friends who have it, well i can´t say that is a easy thing to deal with, but i´m here to show my solidarity. In my research i could learn about the deseas in Brazil so i´m going to say some statistics; The appraisal is what exists , today into the Brazil 1,5 million of people with age equal or better the 80 years has the desea in 2017, will be 2,4 millions.

Well, to deal with it you need love, and to be patience.

Everything is going to be better, just have a positive hope and be strong all the time, cos they need you and you need them.

Hugs from Rio de Janeiro!

Fee! =]

Between that and her stubborn attitude it was decided that she needed to be in a facility.

However, it is five minutes away so our days are spent visiting or taking her out and dealing with angry calls from her abotu ANYTHING.

She sure remembers SOME THINGS for like ever.

But it is hard..specially knowing that his mom would have been dealing with this instead of us bearing the brunt, had she lived.

Look for me at http://crunchycarpets.com or check out the ladies at www.wetcoastwomen.com

Thisis a moving and timely pos Karen .  As a boomer I worry all the time and follow all the prophylactic suggestions and am a long-time consumer of fish oil, etc.  It's so scary.

The story you tell is a remarkable one.  It's one thing to praise the commitment and I think heroism of someone like Geist, but it's much more than a convetional heroic act.  This isn't just jumping in front of a car to push a kid to safety.  This is all day, every day, for a very long time.

I just met an amazing family.  They haven't been married long, and had a baby less than a year ago.  But her dad isn't well so he lives with them.  That meant they needed a bigger and therefore more expensive house which meant they had to live farther from the institutions that support their daily lives.  They seem to have decided it together and are pretty matter-of-fact about it.   It's so damned impressive - and inspiring.  I can't stop thinking abou them.

Cynthia Samuels, Partner
Cobblestone Associates, LLP
Blog and Media Strategies and Content Development Online and on Television   

Don’t
Gel Too Soon

Thank you for you post. Alzheimers is a progressive illness that is very difficult for everyone to deal with on every level. I appreciate the way you said that you got to the point where you did not remember what mom was like. So often many caregivers cannot or will not express that. They feel guilty saying it as if somehow they should be responsible for the illness and often feeling powerless losing someone they love into the cave as you described. Yes, the services for Alzheimers clients are very very expensive as most of the care is assisted living or non-medical type services and those services are not covered by Medicare. Most individuals have to pay out of pocket to care for a loved one. Thank you for sharing.

Comfort Keeper

www.comfortkeepers.com -provider of in-home services for those suffering from the disease of Alzheimers and/or dementia.

Thanks for a great post on a sensitive and difficult topic.  I've found that families don't know where to turn to for help. I'm going to make time for the podcast.

I've been recommending a great resource to my patients and their families.  www.Caring.com.

 It helps families connect with and find all types of resources for their elderly family members and is especially helpful for people with Alzheimers.

Be well,

NurseBarb

www.NurseBarb.com 

Click on the map on their site to find it. They're a national nonprofit organization and check out really well on the charity checklists since the bulk of their money goes to research and advocacy/education. 

They have a ton of material on the national site and in their local offices for caregivers. Dealing with this disease is really difficult and it can be terribly isolating. The behaviors are so unusual and people can stay physically strong for so long that it often really helped people I worked with to understand what was happening with their relative - Alzheimer's as a neurological disease rather than a random set of behaviors from a person who can't really communicate like they used to or "get with the program." 

The chapters can also hook you up with support groups (even some for folks in early stages), care managers, financial and legal information - you name it - and most of their services are free or at reduced cost.  A lot of my work with caregivers dealt with communication - ie, what to say when they ask questions, reducing arguing, going along with memory lapses that just weren't that important (like is it really necessary to correct them if they think it's 1984? No, not so much...not if it keeps things calm and stable.) Of course this is much more difficult when it's someone close to you, but it can be done - I've learned to do it with  my grandma, which was very hard. 

Millions of us will handle this disease in ourselves or a relative in a lifetime and it's a good idea to reach out for support. 

Laurie

LaurieWrites

Click on the map on their site to find it. They're a national nonprofit organization and check out really well on the charity checklists since the bulk of their money goes to research and advocacy/education. 

They have a ton of material on the national site and in their local offices for caregivers. Dealing with this disease is really difficult and it can be terribly isolating. The behaviors are so unusual and people can stay physically strong for so long that it often really helped people I worked with to understand what was happening with their relative - Alzheimer's as a neurological disease rather than a random set of behaviors from a person who can't really communicate like they used to or "get with the program." 

The chapters can also hook you up with support groups (even some for folks in early stages), care managers, financial and legal information - you name it - and most of their services are free or at reduced cost.  A lot of my work with caregivers dealt with communication - ie, what to say when they ask questions, reducing arguing, going along with memory lapses that just weren't that important (like is it really necessary to correct them if they think it's 1984? No, not so much...not if it keeps things calm and stable.) Of course this is much more difficult when it's someone close to you, but it can be done - I've learned to do it with  my grandma, which was very hard. 

Millions of us will handle this disease in ourselves or a relative in a lifetime and it's a good idea to reach out for support. 

Laurie

LaurieWrites

My 80 year old m-i-l lives with us. I work at home, so I am with her more than her son, who works outside the home and is gone most of the day.  She and I get along fine, but it sure can be aggravating to live with her because of the dementia since she gets confused so easily.  They both are in a bit of denial about the dementia, even though her doctor said she had it.  I try not to get frustrated because she can't help being so aggravating.  It makes things worse that she is very deaf and pretty blind as well.  Despite all this, she is pretty independent and ambulatory.  One day she will go into a home, but right now she can pretty much take care of herself, as long as we are around to help her now and then.

My Mom was diagnosed with dementia by a neurologist about a year ago; its not advanced and she lives alone.  I spend several hours each day with her by leaving work early, and that way, I've been able to monitor and assist her with daily needs.  I had taken over her monthly bills for her ... she's on fixed income and we do not have much in the way of financial resources.  Yesterday, Mom just went down and withdrew about half of the funds for upcoming April bills and went on a spending spree yesterday: I don't know what to do.  I've been having that problem with her and trying hard to talk to her about it.  I cannot afford to keep covering her on the monthly shortfalls.  I don't know what to do.  The shut-off notices will be coming, but I'm not going to be able to afford them.  Mom does not understand that with only $600, she cannot go on spending sprees and still have enough to cover her monthly expenses.  She can still cook for herself and bathe and dress herself, and she does not get lost.  But she does get terribly confused and combative at times.  I can't help her with her monthly expenses, when she goes down and withdraws mostly everything as soon as the monthly auto-deposit is recorded.  Does anyone have any suggestions on the financial problem I have with her?  I already have the POA's, etc., but they're not much good under these circumstances.  Has anyone else been through this?  Thanks.