Am I Getting Old?

This week I am going through something many Mom's go through but it is making me feel "old" for the first time... I stopped nursing. I am not a Mom who loved nursing. For 10 months it kept me up late at night and got me up early in the morning. It did not matter whether I was with my child or his horrible replacement The Pump, I was constantly thinking about he hungry, am I uncomfortable?

Billions of Moms have been here, I was even there once before but I did not feel the way I do now. If this is my last child, this is the last time I will ever do this in my life. I cannot change my mind in a week, I cannot do this again ever. 

I can think of nothing that you definitely cannot do again. I can go back to school if I want, I can have another wedding again (hopefully to the same great husband), I can wear the same size I wore in high school (with a lot of work), I can change jobs...etc. 

I cannot do nurse again unless I have another kid. Lets face it having another kid is no small decision and at some point that is not an option either. 

This is the first time in my life I thought, "wow, I am getting older. I am starting to see the other half of my life." I have limitations cannot change.

But then I look at those cute faces and realize I have decades of fun to have with these kids. Amazing new adventures and future nieces and nephews that will fill that fleeting void of baby snuggles (but not keep me up at night or up early in the morning).


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