Awkward Friend Moments: You're Not Invited To My Party!
Dear Mouthy Housewives,
I am planning a surprise party for my husband. I decided not to invite an old friend because we've grown apart and she and her husband never show up for anything, anyway. Of course, I was standing in a store with a giant cardboard cutout of my husband that I had made for the party and I run into her. So awkward. I think I mumbled something about being late for a doctor's appointment and ran out of there practically tripping over the cardboard cutout. What do I do now? I feel terrible.
What Makes You Think I'm Having a Party?!
Dear What Makes You Think I'm Having a Party?!,
I'll answer your question in a second, but first I have to finish making out with my life-sized cardboard cutout of Ryan Gosling. That's not weird, is it?
Oh how I hate awkward friend moments. Of course you ran into this friend while you were carrying a gigantic cardboard party decoration. Why does this happen in life? I don't really know. I guess for the very same reason you run into your ex-boyfriend when you are sweaty and makeup-less after the gym.
I'm not sure exactly what you mumbled to your friend, but I think we can assume she now knows there is a party going on. Or she just thinks you have some sort of cardboard fetish. Either way, it's not a great situation.
If you really don't care about the friendship, just block the whole thing out and pretend it never happened. Or you can send her an email that goes something like this ... "Great to see you the other day! Sorry I was in such a rush. My head has been spinning trying to plan this surprise party for Alex. Would love for you guys to come! Here are details ... blah blah blah." Just keep it short and simple. And don't refer to your husband as Alex if his name is really Ted.
And since she rarely shows up for anything, she is the perfect person to invite, anyway!
Good luck and stop hanging out so much with cardboard cutouts.