The Back and Forth
I wrote a post just yesterday about how someone claimed that birth parents and adoptees were big bad bullies on the Internet. I actually said that all people (not even parent-type-bloggers) are guilty of making generalizations in their blog posts. Then Margie (an adoptive mom) wrote a forceful and necessary post about how adoptive parents need to stop bullying birth parents and adoptees on the web. She attacks some of the names used for birth parents (newsflash: I am not a breeder or a uterus) as well as the religious attacks that some are using. She cites specific posts.
Her last lines speak to me very loudly, no matter the triad position.
Please, everyone, when you see this going on, stand up and say something. We need to send the message loud and clear that adoptive parent preaching and bullying are wrong.
The truth is that there is hate on the web and there is a LOT of hate within the adoption niche. I can't even specifically read the posts that she linked to because the names that I have been called over the years by people (from all religions and lack-of-religions and socioeconomic statuses) leave me tentative when someone calls it out as an inflammatory post. I can't even handle reading posts by birth mothers or adoptees that refuse to look at all sides of the issue and automatically label all adoptive parents as the Bad Guys to Be Taken Down. Extremism makes me sad.
And so, I encourage you to read Margie's post above and comment on the matter. Please know that she is an adoptive mom who has also faced heat in her day so she is not saying that adoptive parents never face nastiness. Speak your truth and what you have experienced ... but also vow to stand up for others. I am trying. I hope you will try, too.