Birthday Weekend and Four Months
By singerskitchen on March 02, 2012
Wow folks! This week flew by for sure. It was a trying week for both the baby and me. Our sleep patterns have been a mess. I know that there are plenty of books and articles stating that a baby's sleep patterns change but it feels so erratic.
For almost 7 years I averaged 5-6 hours of sleep a night because I had my day job as a pharmacy technician and then quickly changed out of my scrubs, worked out and headed to chorister rehearsals for the opera house. I was used to it.
Then I got married. Who knew that I was going to catch up on my sleep. I moved to little old town of Longview from big city Houston and the partying stopped. Yeah..no....I was not a party girl. At least the big city hype calmed down and God called me to rest and sleep.
Little did I know that this was only preparing me for a future life of 5-6 hours of sleep yet again.
It feels oh so different because those nights of deep sleep have been interrupted by a breastfed baby. There are nights I totally feel like a zombie.
I am such a night owl and it has been so hard going to bed early KNOWING I will be needed only 2 hours after going to bed. (I am changing this up though)
Last night Ryan and I finally went to bed at 10:30pm and then he gets a call. My lovely husband has a naturally boomy voice. He really can't help it. Even though we have been trying to train him to use his INSIDE voice, I actually think he does not have one. From my bed I could hear him talking on the phone. I fear that his voice will wake the baby up besides the fact that it had already woken me up.
This morning Ryan tells me that I told him to quiet down twice. Um....I only remember getting up once from my bed to quiet him, but apparently I "shooshd" him from the bedroom. I do not even remember that!!
Anyway, here it is almost midnight and I am waiting for my dear husband to get back from a late night rehearsal and all I can think about is our weekend.
I turn 33 this Sunday and I do not know how to feel about it. A birthday seems so strange but even so some celebrating will happen even though I seem somewhat ambivalent about it. Is this normal?
Feelings I never thought I would have have overtaken me lately and I find myself almost nightly clinging to my bed sheets and crying to God, asking him for the strength that I do not really have on my own.
Today was a wonderful day. The scripture that came to mind is from John 3:30 "He must increase, but I must decrease."
Having a baby has made me realize how selfish of a person I am. This is why I think Scripture tells us to be fruitful and multiply otherwise we become self-absorbed. My baby teaches me daily to love her unconditionally just as God loves me unconditionally. I cannot think of my feelings or react the way I feel, even though sometimes it is SUPER hard. Running on empty is not a pretty sight, let me tell you.
I thank God for giving me the gift of raising a child because HE does not give me more than I can handle but BOY do I need his help daily.
Here's to celebrating 4 months with my baby girl and turning 33 this weekend. I really look forward seeing what more God brings to our lives. :-)
More Like This
Most Popular on BlogHer
By Genie Gratto
Most Popular on Family
By Genie Gratto
Marshalls Reviews & Giveaway
Have you shopped for your children's Back to School outfits? Marshalls carries the latest trends that your stylish kids will love! Read our bloggers' reviews and see why they chose Marshalls plus get a chance to win a $100 Marshalls gift card.