Last night's episode of Project Runway was the second strong one in a row...at least from a runway point of view. To be honest I've tuned out of the "backstage drama" portion of the show. The ones that might have been the ones you love to hate have mellowed out; the ones you thought you might love never really stepped up to be that object of fandom, and frankly...haven't they reduced Tim Gunn's "mentoring" to a handful of "make it work"s and "carry on"s this season without a whole lotta substance going on?

Any way, after yet another meaningless model elimination, we discover that the challenge is to design a look for Diane von Furstenberg's next collection. The collection is based on a Marlene Dietrich movie, Foreign Affair, which is set in Berlin, Shanghai and New York. Obviously it's cosmopolitan, mysterious, international.

The designers get DVF's "look book" to pore over, and they get to use DVF's sample room for fabrics etc., so no measly budget and visit to Mood to worry about. Life is good for the designers this week, eh?

The possibility that Dietrich's character may be a spy leads to some fairly lame spy-talk by the designers...including Leanne slinking about and talking about how she'd like to be a spy. She'd probably be a pretty good one, since she does sort of disappear into the wallpaper, right? She calls herself a Leannimal, get it: Lee-animal? Um, OK, Whatevs.

Tim does what become his 60 seconds of rounds...with some odd-looking skin tone...did anyone else notice that? Maybe it's my TV, but he looked like self-tanner gone wrong on one side of his face.

We have our one true lively moment when Stella completely disses Rachel Zoe, the previous week's guest judge (and focus of a new Bravo reality show because she's a "celebrity stylist"/ I believe Stella accuses her of wearing a "muu muu", which should be the kiss of death for any stylist if true.

So, let's move on to the runway. Once again Nina Garcia is mysteriously absent, and in her place is Fern Mallis (who runs Fashion Week.) DVF is of course the special guest judge.

1. Joe sends a fairly chaotic Shanghai-inspired outfit down the runway. There's this orange long-sleeved shantung top. There's an inexplicable wide fushcia belt. Because orange and fuschia SO scream Shanghai in the 30s, not Jersey in the 80s. There's also a really poorly made black skirt and a weird black hood/scarf with fuschia lining. While there's some nice variety of texture going on, the overall effect is messy, and not at all elegant. Marlene Dietrich would not be caught dead in that skirt, let's just start there.

2. Leanne captures the 30s extremely well, if perhaps a bit more Ginger Rogers than Marlene Dietrich. There's a long purple gown, very 30s inspired with a plunging neckline and ornate clasps at the shoulders. I'm not sure the black belt with a rhinestone buckle was the best waist definer, but the taupe short jacket with capelet provided a heavier, contrasting texture, and also gave a nice mannish accessory to the elegant gown...and mannish clothing was one of Dietrich's trademarks.

3. Terri's outfit was two-thirds successful, featuring really well-made herringbone slacks and a black velvet smoking jacket that provided nice textural and silhouette contrast to the slim pants. The blouse (featuring fireworks, per Blayne) was not a big hit with me. But I didn't have to see too much of it.

4. Jerell's outfit was also two-thirds successful. I liked the black jacket and the gold brocade tunic top, but I did not relate to the blue accents, particularly the blue vinyl-looking belt. It looked cheap and tawdry, not cool and sophisticated.

5. Korto designer her own 30s inspired halter gown, featuring a black and white zebra-like print (without actually being an over-the-top zebra print.) This was paired with a short black jacket with very full elbow sleeves, and splashes of yellow chiffon fabric bordering the halter neckline and emerging from a slit in the front of the dress. The silhouette was dramatic, the execution looked flawless. Do I love yellow? Did I even love the print itself? For myself, no, wouldn't be what I chose to wear...but it made a statement and I could admire it objectively :)

6. Blayne (wearing some funky headbands that remind me of Travolta in Staying Alive...and no, not the sexy Travolta from Saturday Night Fever, the sweaty Travolta from Staying Alive) is 50% successful, but the part that didn't work REALLY didn't work for me. The black jacket with a pop-up collar and double fasteners at the front? Nice. The puffy pantaloon knickers with a tight band at the knee? Hid. Eeeeee. Ous. That is all.

7. Suede created another long gown in some sort of pseudo-camo fabric, but it was really kind of a schmatte. It had a couple of nice details, a low back, a shirred waist, but it also was too voluminous and didn't go at all with the tweedy vest he paired it with.

8. Stella tried again to make something pretty and polished, and basically failed again: Pinstripe pants that fit horribly, a taupe vest with a tie front where even the tie looked wrinkly and messy. The cape was OK, but a bit too big and overwhelming.

9. Kenley created a single piece: A shantung dress with an untraditional floral print. She used black trim at the neck, waist and hem. Yes, it was well-made, and pretty. And like a million dresses you've seen more, really. I agreed with Heidi: meh and double-meh.

In the end, the judges no likee:
Joe
Stella
Suede

And they likee:
Kenley
Korto
Leanne

Shocking as it was, Leanne won two episodes in a row...talk about a dark horse. (I also found it shocking that it was between leanne and Kenly for the win, not Leanne and Korto.)

Unshockingly, Stella ran out of time and was auf'ed.

Which I couldn't disagree with at all, although I could venture to say that Blayne's pantaloon kncikers deserved a special place in hell, if not the bottom three.

What did you think?

We are spared a meaningless model elimination at least, so there's that.

So, what did we learn about this still-too-big-to-keep-track-of group of designers this week?

Terri loves drag queens. No idea why, she just does. Honey, that is so street of you!

Joe starts out mighty uncomfortable with this challenge...because he's straight damnit!...but by the end he's prancing around in a bra with rather tremendous falsies inserted. Hmm.

Daniel continues to confuse fearful and dull restraint with "impeccable taste". As Inigo Montoya would say: I do not think that word means what you think it means.

The producers realized that they have clearly over-dosed us on Kenley, her obnoxious laugh and her own weird delusion that imitating Bettie Page is in any way visionary in 2008...so we saw very little of her.

We also saw little of Korto, and absolutely none of Leanne...who I keep thinking got eliminated a couple of weeks ago, but no. That was the other one. Jenniferzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Stella has realized that talking smack will get her more face time (like we needed that!) so she starts dissing the others, notably Blayne...who "knows nothin'"

Blayne is in neon heaven.

Jerell is growing on me, which is quite unexpected.

Keith will now be known as The Fringe King, much as last season Rami was known as The Draping King.

Perhaps strangest of all: Suede sees dead people. And feels free to share his hallucinationsof his dead grandpa with us all. He also channels last season's Angela by going rosette-crazy. Only they're not rosettes, they're mini green heads of lettuce. Or something.

Oh and by the way...the whole Suede in the third person thing? Completely gone. Which reminds me of a scene in the Cameron Crowe movie Singles (an underrated gem, trust me.) Matt Dillon's dim grunge rocker character Cliff reminisces to Bridget Fonda (what happened to her? She was adorable) about the house he grew up in which was right in the flight path of the airport. The noise of the planes ruined everything...no one wanted to come to his house for summer BBQs, for example. But once he moved away he found he missed the noise of the planes. Cliff compares Fonda's character to those planes. It's a most unorthodox way of telling someone you love them, that's for sure. Now, I may not love Suede, but I do think his third person self-referencing is like those planes. Now that they're gone, I miss them.

But i digress...on to the runway show.

All designs can be seen at the Bravo episode photo gallery here.

1. Kenley and her drag queen, Farrah Moans

Kenley, predictably, channeled the 50's and Marilyn Monroe (granted, so does her drag queen.) This was a verrrry basic silver lame long sheath dress, and about all the drama she added was big black and white feathers around the shoulders. (I think they've done some feather fluffing in the shot in the gallery above...it looked a lot less full on the show.) I thought it was a little basic, and a lot unimaginative.

2. Blayne and his drag queen, Miss Understood

Blayne went for a fuschia and turquoise cartoony color-blocked jester look. It was like the 80s exploded all over poor Miss Understood, and then yes, according to Tim Gunn's oft-shown clip, a pterodactyl form a gay Jurassic Park came sat on her shoulders and spread its wings. But sadly one of the wings was broken and drooping rather obviously. I thought it was pretty egregious personally, but at least it was living out loud, if you know what I mean.

3. Joe and his drag queen, Varla Jean Merman

Like I said above, Joe got over his initial discomfort pretty quickly, and came up with a bubblegum pink "Ann Margaret on the Love Boat" sailor jumpsuit for his queen. Complete with "candy-hiding" low slung belt. The fit was skin tight, but tasteful, if that' possible. Score one for the straight guy.

4. Stella and her drag queen, Luisa Verde

Stella concocted a Vivenne Westwood punk meets Big Country 80s Scottish band resurgence. It was a long black dress with tartan insets fastened with big hook and eye fasteners. It was relatively innocuous, which was both its strength and weakness.

5. Suede and his drag queen, Hedda Lettuce

Although Hedda gave our Suede a hard time about this outfit (and the lettuce-enhanced gloves) in the end Hedda seemed to love this green (and very short-skirted) suit. The cut of the the jacket really enhanced Hedda's hourglass figure. Was the outfit incredibly outlandish? No, which is probably why Suede was not to be in the top 3.

6. Daniel and his drag queen, Annida Greenkard

Daniel created a regular old evening gown of orange, yellow and pink chiffon. The top was a halter, the skirt was tiers of chiffon, and Daniel's one nod to the fact that these were drag queens looking for costumes, not socialites looking for a gown for a benefit, was a humongous flower in Annida's humongous hair. Bo. Ring.

7. Terri and her drag queen, Acid Betty

Acid Bety looks to be a rather avant garde drag queen, and looking feminine and glamorous isn't on the top of her list. Terri went along with that aesthetic with an outfit that threw in a lot of different elements: A kimono-style top with huge sleeves with blue and silver stripes, a red rubber corset, lots of ribbons hanging off it, different-colored boots and more. It's a real hodge-podge, and I did not like it.

8. Jerell and his drag queen, LeMay

This was a rather tasteful citron and midnight swoosh striped sequin cocktail dress with fringe around the hem (but nice, neat fringe, not messy toilet paper fringe a la Keith) and a green pop-up puffy portrait collar to "frame her face." She seemed way more concerned about it hiding her face, but she needs to trust the designer in this case. I thought this was well-done personally.

9. Korto and her drag queen, Sweetie

Korto did indeed go for the gusto on this one with a flame-red, one-sleeved, short red sequin dress, accessorized with a removable red hoop skirt and featuring some interesting flame-like pieces protruding form the neckline. This was one of the few that really looked like the kind of drag gown we all know and love...don't we?

10. Keith and his drag queen, Sherry Vine

Can this guy be sent home soon, please? You have high-waisted silver lame shorts, a black bikini top and then lots and lots of, you guessed it, randomly applied black and white fringy strips of crappy scraps. But let me tell you how I really feel.

11. Leanne and her drag queen, Sharon Needles

having forgotten Leanne even existed, I was quite surprised when there was one more model/design to go after Keith's. Hers was a short black dress with a black and silver Cruella DeVille collar, and a black and turquoise multi-panelled skirt. She tried to hit the over-the-top-ness being sought, but she didn't really hit the drag-queen-ness.

The judges loves them some:
Joe
Korto
Terri

And hates them some:
Daniel
Keith
Jerell

I'm surprised to see Terri there, because I thought her oufit was one hot tranny mess, but not in a good way. I'm surprised to see Jerell there, since there were others equally boring, but less well-made.

Joe ends up being the winner, a triumph of overcoming the inherent limitations of being the straight one damnit!

Jerell is safe, leaving the Aufing to either Keith or Daniel. I honestly can't decide which one most serves to go home, since they're both insufferable.

In the end Daniel is auf'ed for being boring, as is so often Project Runway's wont. Can't complain, but i hope Keith might be next.

What did you think?

It is one of my favorite PR episode formats when the designers have to pitch to an actual client, who gets to pick their favorite designs from the bunch. I like it because it forces the designers into a real world scenario where they actually have to sell someone on their vision, and where that vision has to be clear. I mean, can you imagine Jenniferzzzzzzzzz trying to sell someone on any of her sketches as surreal? They'd be all Inigo Montoya and "I do not think that word means what you think it means" on her in about three seconds.

So last night we learned that the Project Runway folks have finally listened to its throng of fans...and realized we do not care about this "competition for the models too" fantasy. They have reduced the model aspect to literally 10 seconds at the beginning before you've even settled down with your ice cream and Oreos (wait, is that just me who eats ice cream and Oreos while watching rail-thin models get eliminated?)

We learn that the challenge is to design a day to night outfit for a "high powered businesswoman". Who just happens to be...Brooke Shields, who plays a high powered businesswoman on TV. Everyone, well, really mostly Suede, starts creaming their Calvins over Brooke and her goddess-like presence. And they get down to work crating the sketch to pitch to Brooke for her character to wear on Lipstick Jungle. The winner will actually have Brooke wear the outfit on her show. And therefore: No immunity.

After the pitch Brooke picks the following 6 designs:
Keith
Korto
Jerrell
Kelli
Terri
Blayne

Then it becomes high school gym, and each winning designer has to pick a teammate. Daniel and Stella are the unwanted ones, but eventually the teams are finalized to be:
Keith and Kenley (Arrogant and Arroganter?)
Korto and Joe
Jerrell and Stella
Kelli and Daniel
Terri and Suede
Blayne and Leanne (and now that Jennifer is gone, I guess I'm forced to know which one Leanne is.)

Much team work drama ensures, which is truly not that interesting to me. Until Terri made my head snap with her:

"I don't know if he's got balls or a vajayjay, but I have no babies sucking on my titties, so he better man up."

OK, so I may have gotten the order slightly wrong, but let's be clear: the words balls, vajayjay, titties and "man up" were in use in two short, bleep-filled sentences.

Terri: Perhaps I misjudged you, perhaps you really are "street", not Whitney from A Different World.

Sufficiently awakened from a reality show drama-induced stupor, we are ready for the runway.

1. Korto/Joe produced an outfit that featured a belted orange pouffy jacket with gold braid over a taupe tank dress. I know that sounds not so good, but actually it came out a lot better than I expected. The orange color really popped. The belt did control the jacket. The whole flavor was Morrocan. I will say that when the model took off the jacket there were a few fit issues around the breastal area, but given the talk of selling each other down the river that was going on between Korto and Joe (I told you: Drama!) it was way better than I expected.

2. Kelli/Daniel sent a total failure down the runway. It was ostensibly a black suit. But added touches of turquoise and leather print...yes, imagine that in your head...the always-classy combo of the color turquoise with some leopard print...made this thing look about as trashy as you'd imagine. In the whole day-to-evening department, this would work as more of an evening-to-early-morning stumbling home amongst the passed out department.

3. Jerrell/Stella came up with something really cute. this was my personal favorite by far. there was a dress with a bronze cami-style top and a somewhat full print skirt. There was a mustard colored wide leather belt (really more of a waist corset) with a thinner animal print belt over that. I know that sounds like a lot going on, but it was actually somewhat breezy and sophisticated, and definitely different than anyone else's vision.

4. Keith/Kenley created a bright short-sleeved blouse, paired with a very high waisted brown skirt with lots of fringy layers and a matching brown scarf/ascot thingy at the neck. I'll be honest: I hated this outfit. I thought the combination of the very high waist and all that fringe and layers made the model look like a heifer. I thought The tropical print of the blouse didn't match the brown of the rest of the outfit and was more grandmother in Miami like two weeks ago. I HATED it. Shows you what I know.

5. Terri/Suede indulged Terri's apparent great love for wildly printed gauzy blouses over slim pants. Whatever...didn't she just make this outfit? Bo. Ring.

6. Blayne/Leanne went with a very low-waisted Khaki bermuda short paired with a navy tank top and a turquoise shirt over it. (Is turquoise a big color this season, and I missed it...or is that only for tacky people?) OK, if you're gonna go all risky and suggest bermuda shorts for a day-to-evening look, then try not to have your outfit look like the model picked it p at Old Navy, m'kay?

Bottom line, they pulled out two couples they liked:
Jerrell and Stella
Keith and Kenley

And two couples they didn't:
Kelli and Daniel
Blayne and Leanne

I SO would have picked the JerrellStell deam team as the winner, but like I said: Shows you what I know. Seems like everyone loved arrogant Keith's unflattering monstrosity. They won. Boo.

The bottom two got ripped apart pretty well, with my favorite moment being Michael Kors telling Kelli/Daniel that their look was "slutty, slutty, slutty."

In a moment of truth they were each asked who from their team should go home. Kelli threw daniel under the bus because she won the first challenge and has never been in the bottom. That was then, this is now, beeyotch! Seriously...it was her design and her team leadership, but she should be saved because she was somewhat creative with coffee filters?

Blayne, on the other hand, earned the first little droplet of respect from me by saying he deserved to go home rather than Leanne, because he was the leader.

Doesn't Kelli watch this show? Of course Blayne and his integrity were saved, and Kelli was auf'ed.

I was surprised JerrellStell won my heart this episode. Who won yours?

I'll be honest, I thought the show just sagged. They all seemed tired. And I also thought the camera work was terrible, completely terrible. There was no ay to appreciate several of the numbers because you really couldn't get the true picture of what was going on.

But enough whining, on with the recap:

1. Courtney and Twitch danced a Napolean & Tabitha hip-hop number
Can I just say I'm tired of this season's theme of psycho girls chasing indifferent guys? OK, there. I said it. Had to be said. This seemed to fall apart to me. Some stuff seemed out of synch or missed altogether. Even the head spin, that should have been mind-blowing, ended so awkwardly that it looked like it was screwed up. The judges were clearly on crack for the finale because they loved this...and every other number of the evening, regardless of its actual quality.

Solo #1: Courtney
This was one of her best solos, because she incorporated some nice repetition of particular moves throughout that gave it a sense of cohesion and throughline that her solos usually don't have.

2. Katee and Joshua danced a Wade Robson...I guess contemporary, I don't think they actually ever said
This epitomized the flaily style of contemporary choreography, but they certainly did invest it with a ton of passion and intensity and emotion. I felt it was a bit herky jerky though...to the point where I really didn't have a sense of when they were supposed to be n synch and when they weren't. Which either means they or the choreographer failed, no?

3. Katee and Courtney were saddled with a Tyce Diorio Broadway number
This is where the aforementioned crappy camera work made it impossible to judge the number. Seriously. I've ot nothing to say. I feel like I didn't even see it. Meh and double-meh. Oh, and by the way Nigel: I don't care if Katee "finishes" her foot pointing or whatever. Courtney actually does much better at the joyful dances. (Katee does evoke trauma and dark emotions very strongly, though, I will give her that.)

Solo #2: Twitch
I thought this was good, as his solos usually are, but I also feel like we haven't seen anything particularly new from him in these solos. He definitely tries to bring a sense of humor to what he does, but there's a bit of self-consciousness to it.

4. Josh and Twitch danced the Russian Trepack
This was great for about half of it, and then I was just feeling sorry for them and hoping it ended soon. They started to flag; they started to get sloppy. It was really fun, but let's not pretend they're the best at this in the world. One other thing: Josh's split jumps? A. Maz. Ing.

Solo #3: Katee
So very flaily. But let's give her some props: She absolutely has the best control of any of the dancers. I wish she showed more of her control than her ability to flail.

5. Katee and Twitch danced the Foxtrot
The fact that the judges liked this demonstrated how high they were on the crack. First of all: where exactly was the Foxtrot in all that? And where was the posture? And frame? And hold? And steps? There were indeed some dynamic lifts. That's it. They must realllly like Katee and Twitch.

Solo #4: Josh
H's pretty awesome and charming. Great physical control. Awesome contrast between staccato and more groovy moves (which Twitch could take a lesson from), humor (tho' not as much as Twitch perhaps), bravado, and an unexpected sex appeal.

6. Courtney and Josh danced a Jive
This was fun, but not high quality at all. They seemed to be dying out there. However, to me it was not worse than the Foxtrot that came before it, so I wish they had judged them equally.

Finale: All 4 danced a big flailing mess of a Mia Michaels Contemporary piece marred by incredibly erratic and annoying camera work. But let me tell you how I really feel.

Bottom Line for the results:

If it were me, it would go like this:

4th place: Twitch (Come on, you know he hasn't kept up on any style outside hip-hop, admit it!)
3rd place: Courtney
2nd place: Katee (I might like Courtney personality a bit better, but I admit Katee is a better dancer)
1st place: Josh

I think it will go something like this, however:

4th place: Courtney
3rd place: Katee
2nd place: Twitch
1st place: Josh

But what did you think?

For example:

Joe is this year's straight guy, straight, dammit!! And like many of the other straight guys from other seasons (I'm talking to you Kevin) he has no personal style whatsoever.

Blayne so very much wants to be a Christian (as in Siriano, not the religion) but he's really just the creepy kid down the street. And why, WHY is no one mentioning skin cancer and premature aging. OK, references to his tanning addiction and "tanorexia" are clever, but seriously people!

Although "Suede loves hip hop", I believe the producers finally woke up like the rest of us to realize the fact that Suede's use of third person was designed solely to get him air time, and so this week he got none. Suede was sad.

Kenley mistakes her rather mundane obsession with Bettie Page for having true vision, and she has an annoying laugh.

Daniel is confused and whiny. But you be bummed too if your snuggle-bunny was eliminated after only 2 weeks. (I think they should eliminate Daniel too and send him off into the sunset with Wesley...it would make them happy, and put us out of Daniel's misery.)

Stella is like a female, fashion designer Joey Ramone. And really likes leathah!

Korto has a Chloe Dao-like childhood story of danger, escape and reinvention in the U.S.

Terri likes to act all street, but really don't you think she used to be like Whitney on A Different World? I can just see her all prim Southern belle and deciding that being all "Oh no he di'nt" would work better on TV.

Jerrell is really really thin. That is all.

Keith and Kelli got no air time at all, because apparently we got too close to them in other episodes?

And finally: Jennifer and Leanne are the same person. Leanne is Jennifer after cutting bangs and wearing braces. Seriously, don't these producers know how it screws it up when two rivals look too much the same?

Now that I've done my designer recap, let's get to the show recap. The challenge was to design an outfit for America's women athletes to wear for the Olympic Opening Ceremony. Of course, the winner won't really get to see that happen, it's just a convenient cross-promotion. Apolo Ohno this week's guest judge, now apparently has a reality show addiction as strong as Blayne's tanning addiction. I was so hoping they'd show him doing the Quick-step, not just speed skating around a rink :(

Seeing all the designers' work in process signaled pretty early that many of them had not. a. clue. Come on, people, have you not watched an Olympics? Those athletes don't walk around the track with the pouty strut of a runway model, they take to the track with a jaunty swagger that says "I could kick your ass!"

Anyway, here were the (mostly) disastrous results:

1. Korto kicked off with a somewhat futuristic looking outfit consisting of wide-legged white pants, a white tank top and a sleeveless open jacket with red, white and blue striped shoulders. Frankly, I didn't love it. I didn't think all that white would be completely flattering, especially since many Olympians are more muscle-bound than the average bear. It didn't scream athletic to me. I could see it on the runway (unlike a lot of this week's failures) but I could really see it on the track.

2. Suede followed with a completely ridiculous 2-piece outfit: A huge pouffy blue skirt with stripes around the bottom hem, and a plain white sleeveless turtleneck. Totally ridonkulous.

3. Kelli's outfit looked like how Holly Hobbie or Raggedy Ann would dress if she got a flight attendant's job. It was really quite bad. There was a navy skirt with white tim, and a red polka dot blouse with a big bow. Hideous. Totally Bottom 3 material, in my opinion, but then I might be saying that a lot in this recap.

4. Joe's outfit was the only outfit that was appropriate in my opinion. It was quite literally sportswear, and in a good way. There was a zip jacket with a cool zipper effect (he took apart one red and one blue zipper and matched one side from each together.) There was a sporty skort that was flattering and had some nice asymmetrical stripes to avoid being too literal. And the sleeves also had slightly angles stripes. I could imagine this outfit working very very well. And this is one time where I don't think being literal should count against him!

5. Leanne's wasn't bad. She had white shorts and a while sleeveless tunic with buttons at the very wide waistband. The stand-up collar was red, white and blue, but not in a cheesy way. I probably would have put this in the top 3 myself.

6. Daniel's was an abomination. It was a purply blue sheath dress with a red waistband...and then some very unfortunately places red striping on the skirt that looked like a runway to her crotch, where red buttons were places in a patter than made it look like a six-spot domino was emerging from said crotch. Really. It was crass. And totally inappropriate.

7. Jerrell's outfit was more musical theatre than athlete. There were the leggings. Then there was the navy striped pencil skirt. Then there was a puffy short-sleeved blouse with a big bow (what was it about the Olympics that screamed "Big Bow" to some of these designers?) Then, to top it all off, literally, there was a big ol' plantation hat. Can I use ridonkulous twice? because this was.

8. Stella's outfit looked about the same as last week's outfit for the nigh on the town challenge. If all our Olympians are skank hos than this should have won the day. Otherwise? I'm not really feeling the black satin cropped pants and black zip vest with leathah capped sleeves...with the exposed belly button and plunging neckline to boot. They're keeping her for comic effect at this point, right?

9. Keith produced a really short bubble skirt with a white vest, stand-up collar and blue and red scarves. Didn't look athletic at all. Wasn't really creative at all.

10. Terri's outfit had a lot of pieces: White pants, a navy striped jacket, a red, white and blue tube corset, some kind of gold tank that was mostly hidden by a big frouffy red stripey ascot thing. It was actually a nice outfit, less flight attendant, less bad cocktail dress than many of the others. Still not sure it screamed Olympics to me, but we were taking what we could get at this point.

11. Jennifer. Oh my. This evening wear featured a gold striped full skirt, a white top and a navy bolero with jeweled ornamentation across the neckline. And it still managed to be totally boring.

12. Blayne's outfit looked more Bond Girl than Olympian, but it wasn't as horrific as I expected. White cropped pants were paired with a one-shouldered white jacket with what looked like those ribbons the rhythmic gymnasts use sewn on. Could almost pass for athletic.

13. Kenley's outfit was yet the third ridonkulous outfit of the evening. A blue plaid high-waisted skirt with a wide belt and a white top. Cute little outfit for bettie page to wear. No Olympic inspiration in sight.

Although there were so many chices for the Bottom 3 and not enough for the Top, they managed to extract out the following:

Top 3:
Terri's smart suit
Korto's space age pant suit
Joe's outfit that looked like it could really be used for the task at hand

Bottom 3:
Daniel's atrocious button-crotch disaster
Jerrell's ridonkulous Southrn belle athlete
Jennifer's zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Korto took the win, with which I did NOT agree.
Jennifer was auf'ed, with which I DID agree.

And what did you think?

But perhaps I'm getting ahead of myself. Dial it back, Elisa, start from the beginning. (And please don't carry over the referring-to-oneself-in-the-third-person from Project Runway)

We start with Cat Deely coming out wearing a mirror ball dress and poodle fluff shoes. It was an odd look, and I'm sure Mary Murphy didn't appreciate that they obviously both shopped at the same mirror ball clothing store. Adam Shenkman is on hand as third judge, and Paul Abdul is on hand to watch...and to reveal that she cast Adam and SYTYCD choreographer Tyce Diorio in one of their first gigs...dancing on the Oscars many moons ago.

So, is it just me, or did anyone else think Adam was going to reveal that he and Tyce were an item or something? I was totally waiting for it!

Alright, the show ws down to an hour, with two routines form each couple and a solo form each dancer, so I'm going to move it right along, just like the show did.

Couple #1: Courtney and Mark

First, they danced a Viennese Waltz. It really was lovely and romantic. Both of these dancers are wonderful actors, or at least emoters, and they brought a sense of passion and intensity to the routine. The routine itself was quite intricate and very visually interesting, and even though Mark's partnering posture continues to be less proper than I'd like, they really brought out the best in this dance...flow, romance, poignancy.

Second, they danced a Jazz piece choreographed by Sonya, a choreographer new to SYTYCD this season. I did feel the show got a bit self-aggrandizing last night. The judges just kept praising the show, the choreographers, the dancers, the show, the judges, the choreographers some more. OK, OK, I mean I agree, but let we viewers be the ones to praise you, not yourselves, OK? All this to say that yes, I totally agree that Sonya is a great addition to the SYTYCD crew...mostly because she does a style that is a little more angular, a little darker, a little more interesting and unexpected than some of the contemporary and jazz pieces we see. The darkness and offbeat sensibility totally played to Mark's strengths, and this was another good routine for them both...mainly because they really brought out all the little details in the choreography.

On the other hand, Mark's solo was boring. More of the same, same, same and not much on display. And dude, I don't mean to be shallow, but when you have guys like Will and Twitch and Josh displaying their mighty torsos for those of us who lust for the male form...well, you're a nice guy, and a cute guy, but you kind of look a bit young compared to them, and it goes from feeling lusty to feeling skeevy when you start stripping down. Don't do that to us, I beg you.

Courtney's solo was pretty much exactly like every solo she's done thus far. Complete with excellent leaping and spinning and throwing her head back.

Bottom line: I think they're both in danger, but then again, aren't they all? And will the Jasmine Trias effect save Mark?

Couple #2: Katee and Joshua, together again (and they are damn good together)

First they danced a Tyce Contemporary piece. OK, you know I don't like me the "flaily" contemporary, and this did have some of that feeling, but there were also some truly spectacular leaps and lifts. Josh and Katee demonstrate total trust, commitment and passion when they dance, and it makes for some gasps, don't you think?

Second, they danced a Paso Doble, and once again the wardrobe department was either very lazy or very kind, because we got a full on Joshua ogling opportunity. So, i did think there were a couple of times that Joshua didn't full extend his leg sweeps, but other than that these guys nailed the intensiy and passion.

Josh's solo was cute, just like he is. Really he is going to make the final not just because he's very talented and excels at excelling outside his comfort zone, but also because he is just so darn humble and cute and adorable and (is anyone still listening?)

Katee does not really excel at the solos. She flails about and wriggles her fingers and sticks on hip out to look angular and emotes a lot. Good thing she's so damn good at the partner routines, huh?

Bottom line: I actually think putting these two back together pretty much cemented their appearance in the finale next week.

Couple #3: Chelsie and Twitch

First, they danced the Mambo. I like Twitch as much as the next guy (and my S.O. seems *very* enamored with him) but let's just admit that he's not that great at partnering in these ballroom dances. I saw some missteps and they were all because he was weak, not her. This was obviously her strong suit, but people may underestimate the difficulty and quality of what she does.

Second, they danced a Napolean & Tabitha Hip-Hop routine with a "story." This was crazy conductors gone wild, and I thought it was LAME. There wasn't that much dancing, and the whole thing left me cold. Meh to the nth degree.

Twitch's solo was, um, interesting. I'm not sure most of America is really going to dig the gold teeth he donned (and they'll dig even less that Cat tried them on...for reals, yuck!) I don't know if this was his best or will motivate people to vote.

Chelsie's solo was as most ballroom dancer solos are...fine, but hard to admire. At least she ended with some pirouettes and a splits, as if to say "No, earlly, this is dancing, yo!"

Bottom line: I also think they're both in trouble, mostly because Katee and Joshua aren't.

Bottom line for the Bottom 2:

I think Twitch, Mark, Chelsie and Courtney are the Bottom 2 candidates, and I think it may actually be Chelsie and Twitch who go home. They just didn't shine last night. Courtney may go instead of Chelsie, but I'm afraid the Jasmie Trias effect will once again save Mark.

But what did you think?

Pick their inspiration
Pick their fabrics
Design the outfit of their choice (with the caveat that the inspiration and destination for the outfit should be NYC at night.)

I was expecting to really get a lot of great outfits and to be able to start to determine which designers I should be rooting for.

I was a little disappointed, how about you? A preponderance of dresses that looked like someone or something vomited down the front of them (in varying colors and positions) led me to that disappointment, and now I'd like to share it with you. Like drinking, one should never be disappointed alone.

We start with Heidi coming out in, and it must be said: Jeans that were actually too tight! A Heidi fashion faux pas? What is the world and PR coming to? (Meanwhile, didn't Tim Gunn look hawt in his jeans? Seriously, Tim, dress down a little more often...you got it goin' on.)

Then there was some model discussion (I never pay attention to the model discussion..."this is a competition for you too"? Whatevs.) Suede continued to speak in the third person ("Suede loves Tia") And Elisa finds herself getting used to it, which Elisa finds scary, really, since talking abotu oneself in the third person is, usually, a very very bad idea.

The designers were dumped off in various parts of the city to take pictures and find their inspiration.

Suede, Daniel, Leanne and Jennifer were dropped off at Columbus Circle.
Stella, Kenley, Blayne and Keith were dropped off at Times Square.
Korto, Kelli and Joe were dropped off at the NY Public Library (the one with the big lions out front.)
Terri, Emily and Jerell were dropped off in Greenwich Village.

They all took bunches of photos, picked one to use as the inspiration, then went to Mood and spent $100 on fabric to make it come to life. They also learned that the winner of the challenge will get immunity, so it is ON, motha fuckas!

(Perhaps they don't say it quite like that, but they do all get their competitive game faces on...which for Kenley will always include bright red lipstick.)

So, what tidbits helped us get to know the designers better this episode?

-"Suede is gonna rock it!" Uttered by Suede, of course.
-Kenley's print is hideous, but no one will admit it.
-Blayne is a weird freak...with googly eyes worthy of a serial killer.
-Stella got to say "Leathah!" again, which made my evening.
-Terri's fabric and initial constructions looks like she's making a schmatke that your grandma would wear while spending the winter in Boca.
-Leanne didn't learn her less and seems to be seeing how many flaps of fabric she can add, once again to every available inch of her garment.
-Keith is really really into himself and his artistic sensibility. Which is ironic once you see his dress.

But let's get to the runway, featuring an incredibly scary looking Sandra Bernhard. Seriously, Sandra, what have you done to yourself? I'm really not trying to be catty, I'm seriously bemoaning the fact that she felt the need to smooth over and puff up her own unique beauty.

OK, enuogh drama, let's move on.

1. Keith's dress was supposed to be inspired by a ratty, rained-on, torn up magazine he saw on the ground. Oh yes, the dress really did look as pretty as that sounds! He took a white sheath and affixed tiny flaps of fabric scraps all over it, obscuring the actual sheath and making his model look like a rag drawer come to life. It was nasty, people.

2. Blayne also started with a sheath dress, this time black, and then he affixed this hideous rainbow-sherbet-colored cascade of ruffles down one side. It looked like Castro Street itself puked on her the morning after Gay Pride. And it made this tiny wraith-like model look huge. Quite a trick.

3. Joe produced a black skirt with a gold bustier with some grid lines on it. It was Bo. Ring. But at least actually wearable and flattering.

4. Emily also created a black sheath (these designers are killing me with the preponderance of sheath dresses they have produced in a mere three weeks.) Rather than Castro Street, it was a volcano that puked a bunch of orange and red ruffles down the other side of her dress. Her inspiration was a long-exposure look at car taillights, and she went way literal with that red/orange zig-zag path across and down the dress. Bleh.

5. Leanne shocked us all by actually paring back no the flaps of fabric and producing a midnight blue tiered skirt with a simpler sleeveless top. most of the drama was in the gold neck cuff the model was wearing, and all those skirt tiers did create a rather large booty effect. But it was elegant, it did look well-made, and it was a strong finish to a shaky start.

6. Jennifer sent Eponine from Les Miserables down the runway...if her dress was made of navy and champagne satin rags, and if Eponine was actually a matronly, or even pregnant, middle aged woman, instead of a young ragamuffin. Yes, big fail.

7. Jerell created an olive strapless gown with an asymmetrical, ruffled skirt that was long and included a serious train. It was fitted through the torso, and the color choice was at least not black or navy, so props to him.

8. Kelli created a very interesting outfit that included a strippy strappy short sleeve top, a bronze corset with buckles and a skirt. it was urban, it was interesting, frankly I would have scored it top 3 because at least I was intrigued.

9. Daniel sent a big, pouffy, unflattering prom dress in metallic fabric down the aisle, replete with crappy hems.

10. Kenley took her hideous fabric (more Florida tropical, like Terri) and used it on the top (which also included 3/4 sleeves and a turtleneck) and one half of her pouffy bubble skirt. The other half of the skirt was as if purple ombre fabric was 'sploding out from her waist and down that side of her body. It actually turned out prettier than I'm making it sound, although I would never wear it. Later one of the judges said it evoked the 80s...Christian Lacroix in particular, and I agree.

11. Suede created a shiny, chocolate colored halter dress with a collar and full skirt and gold belt and streaks of gold embedded in the fabric throughout. It was cute, but not incredibly creative or original.

12. Stella did her rocker chick thing with low-slung brown pants with black lace up the front and a shiny vest with a zipper front and lace-up back. Sure, it was nice, but again, ho hum.

13. Korto created a blaxploitation star's dream halter backless jumpsuit with wide legs. Pam Grier would totally rock that outfit. As a matter of fact, so would have Katherine Hepburn, so perhaps it's a bit more timeless in silhouette than I originally thought. Either way it was again, kindof blah and unoriginal.

14. Terri's outfit did come out better than i expected, but I'm not sure why everyone was gaga over it. She took her Monet-inspired print and created a backless high-necked, full-sleeved dress and put it over black pants. Whoopdidoo. Not sure why Sandra thought that outfit screamed "Don't mess with me, or I will cut you!" The model, she may be fierce, but the outfit? Dress over pants.

They pulled out:

Keith, Emily and Jennifer as the worst.
Kenley, Terri and Leanne as the best.

They complained about Emily's "explosion of ruffles"..which I'm telling you would be more accurately described as a vomiting of ruffles...and she was auf'ed!

They decided to dig on the 80s revival that was Kenley and gave her the win.

And I continue to be challenged trying to pick a favorite, although this week i think I would have gone with Kelli.

How about you?

This week they switched up partners again, danced two different styles and once again did a solo. Everyone may have their strengths and weaknesses, but they all have talent and charm. There's nobody I just can't wait to send home. In fact this whole season has been like that. There were only a couple of folks I was actively rooting for to go home.

Couple #1 was Will and Courtney

First, they danced a samba. I really liked it, particularly that exciting no-handed, spinning lift. Will got the hips moving (although I agree sometimes it was a bit studied, as opposed to smooth...Will should check out Josh's hips for some pointers!)

Second, they danced a "slow" hip-hop. I actually didn't love this as much as the judges seemed too. Courtney's costume was black and absolutely skin-tight, and I thought it revealed her being slightly off...not quite as sharp or on beat as Will. I also think that she is usually way more facially expressive than she was in this, especially given the subject matter (kind of a Demi Moore/Patrick Swayze "Ghost" theme.) I wanted to like this more than I actually did.

Will's solo totally broke any impressions of him as too serious. He did a James Brown inspired solo which rocked the house, made us laugh, and showed off that somewhat intangible "personality" they're always going on about that the dancers need to have.

Courtney's solo was more of the same contemporary flailing about you usually see, but as opposed to the Ghost hip-hop routine, she did seem very expressive and emotional...and had some more unusual moves to keep it interesting.

Bottom line:
I think Will is definitely safe. I mean, come one, James Brown had to win over the last remaining few who were not already wooed by Will's abs, right?
I think Courtney is at risk of Bottom Two-ness, although I actually think she's more likable than Katee and could elude it this week.

Couple #2 was Twitch and Katee

First, they danced a Mia Michaels contemporary routine piece, based around a door. This was sort of like the bed number earlier in the season...lots of banging on and around the prop and not so much dancing, especially for Twitch. The music was funk,y Katee was the one doing all of the tough stuff, and this worked for them. I still don't think Mia has been quite as amazing this season as in some seasons past, but no one else is copping to that on the show, that's for sure.

Second, they danced a Tyce Broadway routine. Katee has done Broadway three times now this season, and I'll say it again: I'm just not a fan of these numbers. I thought this was really boring and linear...just back and forth, back and forth. Having both of their numbers be about her pursuing him, and him rejecting her? Thematically boring, and actually off-putting for both of them. I actually don't think she is very expressive in these really upbeat, sparkly numbers. yes, she smiles, but she doesn't have that twinkle in her eye that both Josh and Twitch easily have.

Twitch's solo was clever and fun. But it didn't blow me away.

Katee's solo was really contemporary female dancer flail-y. I felt like I had seen it about a thousand times before.

Bottom line:
I think Twitch is still safe, but could definitely be Bottom 2
I think Katee may be the best technical dancer, but could still very easily end up in the Bottom 2

Couple #3 was Mark and Comfort

First, they danced a hip-hop routine. It was really very good. She seemed maybe a little tougher than he, and just a little better at being as quick and sharp as required. but the choreography was inventive and fun, so we really enjoyed this.

Second, they danced a Foxtrot. Oh dear. Other than a really nice spin combination at the end, this was just painful to watch. Slow and awkward, not light and frothy. She had stiff arms, he was uncomfortable leading. Foxtrot=new kiss of death dance.

Mark's solo was random, and since it's now lost its pleasant surprise element, it just looks like more of the same, and like he a Johnny-One-Note, with that one note being just a bit quirkier than other people's.

Comfort's solo was pretty good. She seemed to be taking a cue from Twitch's more humorous style, and it worked for her.

Bottom line:
This couple is Bottom 2, and probably going home. Both of them.

Couple #4 was Josh and Chelsie

First, they danced an Argentine Tango, which was awesome. They are my favorites at this point. Both of them. He is strong and sure and not afraid to break out the pointed toes and the peacock posture. She is just quick and fiery.

Second, they danced Disco. it really wasn't very good, in my opinion. I saw lots of missed handholds, awkward moments and rough entries to and exits from moves. Not their best, even if no one else would say so.

Josh's solo was great. he showed he's not just strong, but also flexible.

Chelsie's solo was the same as most ballroom dancers' solos: Kinda boring. Ballroom dancers are at a disadvantage at this part of the competition. Only Benjy ever made it work for him.

Bottom line:
I think they're both safe.

Bottom line for the Bottom 2:

I would put Comfort, Katee, Mark and Twitch in the Bottom 2. and I would send Comfort and Mark home.

I think Comfort and Mark are going home, but I wouldn't be surprised if Courtney was at risk instead of Katee. Frankly, it is hard to call between Twitch, Josh and Will. I think they are all pretty well-matched with different strengths and weaknesses.

But what did you think?

Talk about jumping on a bandwagon. This week's Project Runway challenge was to make a cocktail dress for your model...and to let her go buy the fabric for you. Green fabrics. What are green fabrics? Well, if you watched the show you might know they include bamboo or hemp or even silk, and you might see the word "organic" tossed around. But you wouldn't know what makes them "green." You might be left wondering if the runway show is going to look like Sherwood Forest with all that green traipsing through it.

Call me cranky, but just a leetle bit of elaboration on production techniques, dye formulas etc. etc. would have been appreciated from this occasional eco-blogger.

There are many scenes of everyone freaking out that their models bought shitty fabric...and many of them bout the same fabric (another tablecloth debacle, right?) As we are gradually getting to know the designers, here are the tidbits we learned:

-Suede talks about himself in the third person. It's weird because he is way younger and less crochety than Bob Dole. So I guess age and crochety-level does not determine the ratio at which one refers to oneself in the third person. Elisa finds that fascinating.

-Stella is a walking sterotype. Remember when Joan Cusack checked out a price tag on one of Sigourney Weaver's fancy dresses in "Working Girl" and exclaimed "It's not even leathah!!" ?? Well, Stella said "leathah" about 300 times in this episode, and I annoyed my viewing companions by saying "It's not even leathah!" immediately after every single time. Sort of like a drinking game, but less fun for other people.

They are really doling out our quality time with designers in very small doses, you know?

This week's guest judge is Natalie Portman, who is really looking a bit like a lollipop head these days. (That's code for really really skinny, which makes her head look unusually large, for those of you unfamiliar with my polite way of wondering if someone needs some time in an eating disorder clinic.)

MK shaved in her honor, but I must say that Editor-at-Large Nina has completely abandoned her roots and hasn't said "hola" to the contestants in ages and ages. I'm sad, but I think there's no point in even tracking it anymore...she will never say "hola" again! (Yes, I'm trying reverse psychology, I'm sly like that.)

On to the runway:

1. Keith sent a champagne silk halter dress with an empire wait down the runway. Unfortunately he also sent a skirt that looked more like a valance for a condo show unit down the aisle with the more elegant top half, so the overall effect was only so-so.

2. Terri sent a sleeveless midnight blue dress with a ruffly collar and a wide belt down the runway. Frankly it looked a bit too day-to-evening, not cocktail, to me. This was like Naughty Secretary Gets a Chance for Upscale Hobnobbing...and isn't quite dressed appropriately.

3. Wesley sent a backless, puckery, ill-fitting and poorly constructed brown satin schmatke down the runway. 'nough said.

4. Jerrell sent a peacock-themes dress down the runway that was surprisingly nice. I don't think I expected actual peacock feathers to inspire anything un-tacky, and this was certainly not a stand-out, but not horribly literal and unattractive. I liked how he used the feathers as simply trim on the bottom of the skirt.

5. Jennifer sent a really unimpressive orange and gray peasant-y dress down the runway. Halloween comes early. And faded. I thought this was in no way a cocktail dress and totally deserved Bottom 3 status.

6. Daniel sent a cute black dress down the runway. It had a portrait neckline, cap sleeves, and short full skirt with pockets. It was a bit girly for me to wear at my advanced age, but on the model it was perfect. This was the first dress that came down the runway and made me think it was actually cute and wearable.

7. Joe sent a simple brown satin sheath down the runway with rhinestone straps and a rhinestone keyhole at the waist. Nicely executed, but not exactly creative or compelling.

8. Suede sent by far the most creative concept down the runway, using strips of red and champagne fabric to create an asymmetrical and unpredictable weave effect all around the fitted bodice, and pairing it with a short, tulle underskirt with a champagne satin overlay. A little more avant-garde, unpredictable and yet still wearable.

9. Kenley sent a simple champagne sheath with a big ruffly near-Elizabethan collar and a black belt. Personally I liked Daniel's black dress better, but this was definitely well-done.

10. Kelli sent a somewhat separates-looking dress down the runway, with a blue top, champagne skirt, ruffly bolero-style shoulder effect and ropy things down the back a la Santino. I didn't get it, but it was well-made.

11. Leanne sent a horrible brown satin sack dress with random flaps of additional brown satin fabric hanging all around like severed dog ears. It reminded me of when I was a kid, and I actually used to try to hem things. And no matter how hard I tried to do it evenly all the way around by the time i got to the end I had this extra flap of fabric that then I had to sew down and hope no one noticed the crookedness of my hem. It was like those extra flaps of fabric were sewn al over the dress.

12. Stella sent a champagne one-shouldered dress with lacing up one side of the skirt and up one sleeve down the runway. Herein we learned that Natalie doesn't like asymmetrical things. Must be hard to be so beautiful and symmetrical that you must reject those of us that are less so. Not that I'm personalizing or anthropomorphizing her feelings about clothing and apply it to people or anything.

13. Blayne Sent a boring fuschia and black dress with one random puffy drapy shoulder down the runway. Did I mention Bo. Ring.?

14. Emily sent a waitress uniform down the runway. Seriously, it had a short, full, black skirt and a white top. OK, the top was strapless and had some braided fabric around the waist and top border of the strapless top, but she was wearing a weird chili-pepper-looking necklace, and I swear if you added sleeves she'd fit right in serving you breakfast at the Original Pancake House.

15. Korto made a nice gold strapless dress...and then she turned it inside out and thought that would be clever and creative. Or something. And yes, she gave her model's ass fins.

In the end, they pulled out the following designers:

Designers to praise:
Kenley
Suede
Stella

Designers to slam:
Korto
Wesley
Leanne

Suede won, which was entirely appropriate.

Wesley lost, which was pretty predictable and no great loss.

So, anyone have a favorite yet, or is it still just too soon?