Lori@BetweenUsGirls's blog

Sarah Palin for Vice President? - I Think I Need a Reality Check

2008-08-29T20:15:16-05:00

As a Democrat, my initial reaction to
John McCain's choice of running mate was one of disbelief quickly
followed by wicked glee. A "hockey-mom" from Alaska, mayor of a town
of all of 9000, an inexperienced Governor who is still trying to get a
handle on things? (Snort) How awful and yet, for the Democrats, how
wonderful! McCain just blew a hole in his own sinking ship!.
Woohoooooo!!

That was my initial reaction. Then I thought a little more about why he chose Sarah Palin. And that thought process led to a dark and scary place.

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Wow, I Guess Cell Phones Really Do Cause Brain Damage

2008-08-15T09:40:18-05:00

As a society, we
are fascinated by
gadgets of all kinds. Laptop computers, digital cameras, iPods,
BlackBerries are our new best friends. We take them with us wherever
we go, we gaze at them lovingly, we we share our deepest secrets with
them. Even those of us who are
technological dinosaurs, tend to at least be hip enough to have a
cell phone. But, like any new drug, our high-tech toys come with
potentially serious side effects.

Most of you have heard that studies
have linked cell phone usage with brain damage and tumors, especially
in children. But that's not exactly the kind of brain damage I'm referring
to. I'm talking about behavioral rather than anatomical and
physiological brain damage. You know – the kind of damage that,
despite healthy
neurological tissue, leaves us acting like social
morons. What ever became of manners, discretion, common courtesy?
Are social skills, like eight-track tapes and mullets, simply destined to
become a thing of the past? And why exactly am I going on and on about this?

Well,
I was recently reminded of how our love affair with electronic gadgetry
can turn us into blubbering idiots. Let me share with you a tale of
electronic be-witchery and human frailty.......a cautionary tale if you
will.

I was in Sears the other day, walking
from the shoe department to the children's department with my two
kids in tow. As we passed the registers (centrally located for no
one's convenience) a young woman came out of the children's
department walking toward us, chatting away loudly on her cell
phone. The sales clerks, my two eight-year-olds and I were treated
to her end of the conversation which went like this:

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Passage Meditation: How it Can Help You to Translate Your Spiritual Ideals into Your Everyday Life

2008-08-07T09:36:37-05:00

Although meditation is
much-talked-about, it is easier said than done for most of us. It can
seem too foreign, too complicated, or too strange,
but somehow the promised benefits keep drawing us back in to take a look again and again and to wonder:

Can I learn to do this? Will meditation really
help me to think more clearly, get in touch with my true self, realize
that I am more than my body, more than my mind, part of a greater
whole? Can I learn to train my mind, to become more focused, to learn
to think and act rather than to simply react? Will I ever be able to
sit still long enough to even try?

I believe that we all have what it takes to do this, but we may
need a little help. There are many, many different ways to meditate and
we need to find the way that is right for us. I've been searching for
the right way for myself for a while now and I think that I may have found it. So of course, I 'd like to share it with

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4 Steps to Finding and Following Your Passion

2008-07-25T10:21:16-05:00

There is so much talk about discovering
your passion, following your bliss and living a life that you love.
Hearing messages like these over and over, we can't help but to take
a look at our own lives and to perhaps find them lacking. We wonder
how we can live a life of purpose and meaning, how we can follow our
bliss. Then we begin to wonder. What is my bliss? Do I have a
passion? Did I ever?

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How to Stop Procrastinating and Start Doing

2008-07-18T14:07:14-05:00

Why put off until tomorrow what you can
do today? Well, because it's easier, you have more interesting
things to do and, perhaps, you never really wanted to do those things
in the first place.

Procrastinating isn't just about
waiting until the last minute to get something done. It can also
show up as the tendency to avoid confrontation, a reluctance to take
risks or try new things, the ability to make big
plans but to never
follow through, the tendency to get sick or tired when faced with
unpleasant tasks or the choice to blame others for your unhappiness
instead of taking action.

Some of us have a bigger problem with
procrastination than others, but we are all guilty of it now and
again. What about you? Have you ever waited until the eleventh hour
to pull together a term paper or a report for the boss? Can you
always find a reason why that talk about boundary issues with your
mother-in-law can wait? Do you spend hours or months researching the
best brand of toothpaste or minivan? Do you keep talking about that
new business you're going to start or that book you're going to
write...someday? Whoops, that

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How to Keep Your Cool When the Heat is On

2008-07-11T10:00:58-05:00

Whether you're a chronic worrier or
steady as a rock, chances are that you have experienced anxiety at
one time or another. I'm not talking about panic attacks or anxiety
disorders, just the run-of-the-mill anxiety we experience when we are
about to face someone or something that sets those butterflies
a-fluttering.

Think blind date, job interview,
marriage proposal,
confronting your nosy neighbor...any situation
that might make you tense and fearful. You're worried about the
impression you'll make, you fear you might embarrass yourself, you're
afraid that you'll come across as unprepared or that you will get a
negative reaction.

The anticipation of potentially
stressful events can be worse than the event itself. So when the heat
is on, how do you keep your cool? Next time you are worried
about an upcoming event, try some of these ideas and see how they
work:

Do Your Homework

Preparation is key. If you are worried
that things will go wrong or that you won't be ready for whatever is
thrown at you, take a hint from the scouts and be prepared.
Gather whatever information or tools that you think you might need
and have them at the ready.

Breathe

Breathing exercises really can soothe
you and help to keep your heart rate and stress level down. One of
my favorites is to breathe in and out through your nose counting as
you do. Count as you breathe in, pause and count the same number as
you breathe out so that the in-breath and the out-breath are equal.
Take a couple of normal breaths and repeat but make the pause a
little bit longer this time. A couple more normal breaths and repeat
making the pause longer still. As you proceed, you will find that
your breathing naturally begins to slow and the longer pauses seem
perfectly comfortable.

The key with breathing to reduce stress
is that you need to practice it a lot when you are not
stressed. Then you can easily fall back on a breathing pattern that
relaxes you when you find yourself getting stressed. Don't wait
until you're in the middle of a difficult situation to give it a try
or you might sound and look like you're in labor. Not a good image
to project, trust me.

Visualize Success

Use your imagination to rehearse. Play
the scenario out in your mind over and over seeing yourself in a
positive light. In your minds eye, play the role as you hope to in
real life. See yourself looking and speaking with
confidence...imagine all of the possible obstacles that you might
encounter and see yourself handling them gracefully. Role-playing,
even imaginary role-playing, can really improve your performance in
real life.

An interesting exercise is to
eventually combine this with your breathing exercises. When you are
visualizing your scenario and you feel yourself getting nervous,
practice altering your breathing to the relaxing pattern that you've
been practicing (you have been practicing, right?) and see how it
calms you and allows you to continue on with your visualization.

Keep Your Sense of Humor

This is a wonderful way to take some of
the pressure off. Visualizing your scenario as a sitcom can help you
to keep the seriousness of the situation in perspective. Run through
the scenario in your head imagining how it would play out on your
favorite television comedy. What sarcastic remarks or pratfalls
could be a part of it? Imagine it going horribly, but hysterically,
wrong. Making yourself laugh can help to break the tension.

Focus on Others and the Situation

When the time finally arrives, it's
time to get out of your own head. Nothing can screw you up more than
analyzing your every move as you make it. The second-guessing and
hesitation will undermine your performance. Focus on what is
happening around you, on trying to listen carefully and on responding
to what is going on now. There will be plenty of time for
second-guessing later.

Whatever situation you find yourself
in, you can keep your cool and stay in control. Do your
homework, practice your breathing, keep your sense of humor and when
the moment comes, stay in it. Try out some of these ideas and let me
know how it goes. Have any other ideas? Please share!

7 Tips for Keeping Things in Perspective

2008-07-09T10:06:53-05:00

We are all too familiar with
stress and what it can do to our health and well-being. Each and
every day new problems crop up that create the opportunity for worry
and anxiety to stop us in our tracks. But every problem that we
encounter doesn't carry the same weight. Difficulties, like people,
come in all shapes and sizes and keeping our perspective is important
if we want to avoid being sent into a tail-spin numerous times a day.

So how do we do this? How
do we keep things in perspective so that we aren't overcome with
anxiety every time an obstacle shows up in our lives.

There are many ways to
maintain perspective – to see our problems for what they really are
and to not let them balloon to larger-than-life proportions. It all
comes down to stopping, breathing, and taking the time to ask
ourselves some important questions:

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A Movie-ng Message - Pixar's Plea for the Environment

2008-06-30T10:30:13-05:00

WALL-E, the latest in a string of Pixar
spectaculars, opened this past weekend and we thought it would be a
fun movie for the whole family. Who doesn't love a story about a
cute little robot and his escapades in space? Well, it was a fun
movie in some ways and it certainly provided the clever animation and
storytelling that we
have come to expect from Pixar. But I found it
more disturbing that I did entertaining and, honestly, that made me
love it even more.

The ads for the movie focus on the
antics of a robotic E.T. look-a-like. What the movie trailers don't
let you in on is that WALL-E isn't just any robot. He spends his
days on what is left of the Earth after the “progress” of
humankind polluted and depleted it to the point hat the Earth is no
longer able to sustain life. The humans, having left to live “in
space,” leave WALL-E behind to clean up the mess.

The bulk of the story revolves around
WALL-E's relationship with a bot named EVE who is sent back down to
Earth to search for signs of life. While the story on the surface
appears to be about WALL-E's relationship with his new friend, the
underlying story of the human destruction of the Earth is

Finding the Meaning of Life

2008-06-27T14:20:32-05:00

We all have our moments...times when we just don't like the way life is going, when we feel that nothing is working, when everything seems so overwhelming. We feel like we're swimming upstream and we wonder why we are even bothering. What's the use? Why does life have to be so hard?

Sometimes life is hard. But it's also true that no matter how difficult it gets, there is always a way to go on. Always. No matter what. Whatever your circumstances, you can find something to live for. But when we are in the midst of a bad time, we can easily lose sight of that fact, can't we? Times like these call for drastic measures. Times like these call for a story. Let me tell you one

The Scourge of Materialism

2008-06-17T13:35:17-05:00

It seems that there is a plague in our midst. It threatens to steal away our health, our happiness and perhaps our future. Celebrity carriers like Paris Hilton and Donald Trump may be it's poster-children but they have a lot of not-so-famous company. Look around...it's likely that many around you have already been infected. In fact, chances are good that it's gotten most of your loved ones and quite possibly.......you.

Materialism, consumerism, commercialism...call it what you will. It permeates our culture. Buying, spending, accumulating...these are the building blocks of our society. Our values reflect it and our government encourages it. Feeling good about ourselves comes not from what we do, but what we have. Social status is based on wealth and possessions. Legislation is designed, not to protect the common good but, to protect corporate profits and shareholder interests and to preserve the link between money and power.

Research (not to mention common logic) has demonstrated that the more people value materialistic goals, the less happy they are and the more likely they are to act in socially and ecologically damaging ways. It is becoming more and more clear that when we choose to define success in materialistic terms, we pay a very high price. Here in the United States, we are reaping what our capitalistic society has sown and most of us are disappointed with the harvest.

Huge fuel costs (despite record fuel industry

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Mindfulness Meditation and Stress Reduction

2008-06-09T09:58:58-05:00

Stress is a given in our lives. Difficult people, time pressures, repetitive and routine tasks, financial concerns, and a lack of self-confidence are some of the most common stressors we face. But it is not the stressors themselves that cause the problem. It is the way we handle, or fail to handle them, that causes us grief.

Meditation has long been known to assist people in dealing effectively with the stresses in their lives. It is a simple and proven method, yet few of us take advantage of it. Why? Perhaps because we see it as being much more difficult than it really is. We view it as something foreign, something that is one small part of a very complex religious or philosophical system that we may have no interest in or little time to pursue. Or, we just think it is too hard.

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Parents and Children - How Much Influence Do We Really Have?

2008-06-06T09:11:13-05:00

As parents, we often worry about how our kids will handle things as they grow up. We try to teach them all that we know in the hope that what we are telling them will get locked away in their brains and that, when faced with temptation or a difficult choice, our words will be recalled and a wise choice made.

But how much influence do we really have on our children's behavior? There is some good news here. Research has shown that throughout our children's lives, we parents really are the strongest influence on our children's behavior. Our kids are listening and learning from us. They do consider what we have to say about issues and when they are confused or unsure, we are often the first ones to whom they turn for advice...until high school, that is.

When our kids become teenagers, we parents lose our power. Teens still hear our voices if only faintly, but there are new voices – those of their peers. Parent's voices simply cannot be heard over the din. The voices of our children's peers are far more piercing and persuasive.

What problems can this create for our kids? Well, at a time when our children are beginning to grow up and are faced with many more temptations and life-altering choices than we might like, they are taking there cue from their friends. Peers are their primary counsel when it comes to whether or not to become sexually active, to use condoms, to drink, to take drugs, or to smoke. Should they wear their seat belts? Should they wear helmets? Should they use sunscreen? The list of important decisions that our children are faced with in their teens is endless.

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The Power of Positive Emotions

2008-06-04T10:03:09-05:00

We all know that positive emotions are desirable. Who wouldn't rather feel loving than hateful, joyful than fearful, or happy than disappointed? It doesn't take a brain surgeon to tell you that positive emotions make each moment that we are experiencing them a pleasure. But the truth is that positive emotions are far more powerful than that. Thanks to the work of Barbara L. Fredrickson, we now know that positive emotions can bring, not just momentary pleasure, but long-lasting benefits as well.

Fredrickson's Broaden and Build Theory of positive emotions shows that positive emotions produce optimal functioning, not just in the present moment, but over the long-term. Her contribution to the field of Positive Psychology has been significant, but her work can benefit each of us individually as well.

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The Earth Runneth Over - Musings on Birth, Death, Nature and Population Control

2008-06-02T13:13:46-05:00

Two Sundays ago we had the first beautiful day we have had in a long time...sunny and warm and just about perfect. So we packed a picnic lunch, piled in the car and drove to Salt Springs State Park.

Salt Springs is a rather rustic park in Northeastern Pennsylvania. It's full of old growth Hemlock's, a variety of wildlife and some moderately challenging trails. As we hiked, we paused occasionally to catch our breath as the beauty of nature (and some pretty steep trails) threatened to steal it away. Then, tired and hungry, we sat by a lovely creek and listened to the sounds of water tumbling over rocks as we ate lunch. All-in-all it was a beautiful day.

I hope to spend more of my days in this way...exploring our beautiful natural world and having fun with my family. There are still so many scenic, unspoiled places out there, but they are disappearing and rather quickly. Can we continue to take them for granted? Dare we assume that they will still be there for my children to bring their children to? I wonder.

While we were hiking we stopped to read the few educational plaques that were posted along the trails. I already knew that when this country was settled, most of what is now the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania was covered with forests much like the one I was standing in. William Penn named the Commonwealth Pennsylvania for a reason ( it means Penn's Woods). What I didn't know was that in the last 100 years of human progress, population growth and industrialization, the forests of Pennsylvania have been reduced to 1/10th of 1 percent of their original size. Think about that for

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Bee-ing a Good Citizen

2008-05-30T09:34:17-05:00

Bee-ing a Good Citizen

The idea of being a good citizen means different things to different people, but I think that, at it's core, good citizenship refers to doing not what is easiest or best for oneself, but focusing more on what will contribute most to the common good. Some will explain it as being helpful to one's neighbors, others may describe it as loyalty to one's country. What creates variations in our definitions of good citizenship is our individual perspectives of what larger context we are considering ourselves a part, and, what obligations we feel toward that larger context.

My beliefs lead me to view the entire planet as the larger context of which I am but a small part. I believe that we are all - the plants, the animals, all of humanity - part of an interdependent web of existence. We are all part of one large ecosystem and our obligation is to ensure the well-being and continuity of that entire system and all of its members. While I know that some may not share these beliefs or simply may not care enough to have given it any thought, I am happy to see that, little by little

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