elanas's blog

Obama in Cairo: On women, religion and feminism

2009-06-11T06:10:48-05:00

When President Obama uttered the words “women’s rights” during his
speech at Cairo University last week, my ears perked up. The fact that
a US president is putting women’s rights up there on the international
agenda — on par with peace in the Middle East, no less — is indeed
historic. That he has the guts to say to a room full of Egyptian men
that women’s rights in the Muslim world are a topic that needs
addressing, was quite a thrill. The fact that there was some applause
after he made that opening statement, “the sixth issue that I want to
address is women’s rights,” was absolutely startling. Signs of change,
perhaps.

But when Obama started to outline the details of his vision for
women’s rights in the Muslim world, that’s when I started to bristle.
Because although issues of education and literacy are obviously vital,
these issues barely skim the surface of what Muslim women have to face.
But more than that, Obama’s underlying philosophy guiding his approach,
one that is nestled in the cultural relativism that tells people to
look the other way when women are hurt in the name of religion, signals
a very troubling trend in gender, religion and politics.

I reject the view of some in the West that a woman who chooses to cover her hair is somehow less equal.

So first of all, what view that a woman who covers her hair
is less equal? With all due respect, as someone who has been studying
and writing about women and religion for some time, I can honestly say,
what the hell is he talking about?

What I think he may be referring to is the claim made
primarily by religious people that liberal feminists are condescending
towards women who choose a traditional lifestyle. I’m pretty sure
that’s what he’s talking about. But even if that’s the case, it’s a
bungled statement. Liberal feminists do not look down on women who
cover their hair, but see the cultural demands placed upon women’s
bodies as wrong and unfair, and a violation of democratic principles. A
woman can certainly choose to cover her hair, but the type of rhetoric
that accompanies religious demands for female body cover are often very
damaging for women’s freedom, health and overall well-being.

Obama continued in the next sentence:

But I do believe that a woman who is denied an education
is denied equality. And it is no coincidence that countries where women
are well-educated are far more likely to be prosperous.

Okay, I don’t entirely understand this either. What is he trying to
say? The first sentence was condemning people in “the west” who see
hijab-clad women as inferior. Now the “but” we were expecting was not
an exploration of how hijab can humiliate women, but about the
importance of education. Did I miss something? What’s the connection?
His message seems clear: Okay guys, you can keep the hijab but make sure your girls get an education. And with that he skipped right over an entire world of issues around women’s body in religion.

I wonder, why bring did he up hijab in his opening if he wasn’t
going to talk about it at all? I think he was just trying to score
points with those who disagree with liberal feminists. He was trying to
say, okay, I hear your point. Those liberal feminists can be really
mean and offensive to you. So forget that — let’s talk about education.
The inferred, unspoken sentence in between is where he talks, man to
man as it were, about those annoying liberal feminists.

In case the thousands of Egyptian men in the audience did not hear
clearly enough that Obama was trying to say, “Hey, I hear you guys,” he
made himself perfectly clear in the next sentence:

Now let me be clear, issues of women’s equality are by
no means simply an issue for Islam. In Turkey, Pakistan, Bangladesh,
Indonesia, we’ve seen Muslim-majority countries elect a woman to lead.
Meanwhile, the struggle for women’s equality continues in many aspects
of American life and in countries around the world.

Did Obama just say that Muslim countries are better to women than
the US?! Are we to understand that since the late Benazir Bhutto was
head of Pakistan and Hillary Clinton recently suffered a sexism-filled
loss in America, that women are better off under Islam?

Let’s talk about this for a moment.

What about the fact that in Saudi Arabia women cannot drive?

Or that the first four women in history were only last month elected to parliament in Kuwait?

Or that according to rankings of the International Parliamentary Union,
Saudi Arabia, Qatar, and Oman are ranked LAST in the world because they
have ZERO women in government? And that they are followed closely by
Yemen, Bahrain and Lebanon?

Actually, Egypt, the country in which the hall full of men applauded
at “women’s rights”, there are a total of 8 women out of 442
representatives in the upper parliament — a total of 1.8%
representation. Egypt, in fact, ranks 134 in the world in terms of
gender and politics. That’s pretty low. Even compared to America’s
ranking at 73. Sure, Mr. Obama, you have plenty of work to do. But
let’s face it, the Muslim world has even more work to do.

And we’re just talking about democracy and basic rights. We haven’t
even gotten to honor killings, genital cutting, polygamy or child
brides.

Dutch-Muslim activist Ayaan Hirsi Ali, interviewed by Jeb Golinkin for the New Majority, said as follows:

President Obama’s speech didn’t do much for Muslim women. He defended
their rights in Western countries to wear the hijab. He didn’t touch on
Muslim women being confined, being forced into marriages or being
victims of honor killings: These traditions and principles in the Koran
and in Islam are being practiced in the West. He didn’t address that. I
think he was just appeasing the Muslim world because …they have these
notions that Muslim women in Western countries are not allowed to wear
the headscarf or cover themselves. I mean you can wear whatever you
want in the United States.

In other words, Obama’s post-modernist, relativist stance offers
protection for those who wish to oppress women. That is their way. It
is their culture. Let them do it.

Obama is ultimately a man talking to men about women. Women are
still objects and outsiders. And women’s freedom is the price to pay
for improving relations between men in America and the Arab world.

Hirsi Ali continued:

In Egypt where he spoke, women who do not wear their
veil in public are subjected to very obscene remarks on the street and
even sexual assault. Nowadays, even if they are covered they become
victims of the same things: That is, in public, in Egypt, as a woman,
you run 80% of the time the risk of being assaulted simply because you
are a woman walking down the street. They are forced into marriages;
their testimony in countries where Sharia is law is just half of that
of a man. They can be divorced with no rights. They need guardians, a
married guardian or they cannot sign any legal papers. The President
simply did not address Sharia or Islamic law in relation to women.

Obama, then, ignored the really important issues like women’s basic
rights and safety. He did it in order to make nice with a room full of
Arab men. Once again, women’s rights, even when given lip service, are
relegated to last. As Phyllis Chesler wrote,
“I fear that President Obama does not understand the difference between
a free choice and a forced choice; the difference between womens’ human
rights and the subordination of women in the name of religion.” Indeed.

On Disney and Dietitians

2009-03-24T04:56:02-05:00

An article about dietitians in last week's LA Times took me back to watching Disney films with my kids. Among all the Disney rubbish that I sat through over the years, I must confess that I love Lilo and Stitch. Despite Disney’s troubling track record when it comes to issues of gender and multiculturalism, in this movie, the animators seemed to have broken their own patterns not only by enchantingly capturing the Hawaiian music and atmosphere, but also by the way they depict the main character.

Lilo is the rare example of a female heroine who is short, plump, awkward, doll-hating, untrendy, opinionated and even angry (!) – yet, she is treated with an adoring respect and compassion by certain key figures she comes into contact with. It’s the kind of setting that gives comfort to those of us who were not, shall we say, typical ‘girls’ growing up. It has the potential to be, on some level, almost healing for girls (and women) who tend not to fit societal expectations.

Yet, there is one aspect of the movie that for me remains troublingly stuck in the typical Disney Cinderella/Belle/Snow White paradigms of gender, and shows just how stuck American culture of gender and body really is. The issue is the portrayal of the background hula dancers in the opening scene. The group of dancers is in a certain way atypical of Disney in that the WASPish blond and blue eyed bimbos have been replaced by actually dark skinned creatures. Beyond the color, however, the women are unfortunately identical not only their cookie-cutter appearance, but also in their picture-perfect body.

The reason this is so troubling is because of how purposefully and intentionally this was done. Writer and director Chris Sanders explained in an interview that in order to sketch these dancers, the animators observed real hula classes in Hawaii, in which the dancers were actually quite realistic, and varied in their body shapes and sizes. One of the dancers was interviewed and quite movingly said that one of the most beautiful aspects of hula dancing is that it does not matter what a person looks like, how old or young, how fat or how thin – everyone can do it, and everyone in Hawaii apparently does.

But for Disney, this was not a viable message. Rather, Disney’s crews
decided that the American audience needed to see only “flawless”,
characterless – and in fact completely unrealistic – background
dancers. How the writers expected Lilo to get her positive body image
in such a fake culture, one can only surmise.

What is telling here is not only the extent to which American culture revolves around thinness, but how completely intolerant and despising Americans are of even the slightest “imperfection” of body. I think many Westerners truly hate fat people. Because in Western culture thin is not only correct, but it is equated with goodness, purity, and righteousness. I would say that the contribution of Disney to world culture is this exact message: Beauty and thinness equal goodness. Ugliness and imperfect body equal evil. Hence studies show that kids as early as kindergarten, when shown photos of women who are thin and beautiful alongside those who are not, will describe the beautiful ones as “nice” and the less beautiful ones as “mean.”

I thought about this as I read in last week’s LA Times a new study that shows that there is a new population of fat-people-haters: dieticians. Sure, we all knew that employers prefer thin blonds. Not only do thin people get better jobs and more promotions, but thin people are also assumed to be smarter and more competent. Study after study has shown the same thing: when people see two identical resumes, and the only difference is the accompanying photo, where one is someone thin and “beautiful” (by American standards) and the other is someone not, the person who is thin is assumed to be better all around. Yet, this new study places this deplorable habit squarely in the camp of those who are supposed to be sympathetic to overweight people. Dieticians, whose job is to sit with people who are trying to improve their lifestyles and their health, are guilty of the assumption that people who are overweight are “lazy”, “unmotivated”, “slow”, “inactive”, “insecure,” and of “low self-esteem”. No wonder people hate going to dieticians!

I mean, picture this scenario: A dietician walks into a room full of people, and automatically categorizes them according to their appearance. Those who are thin are categorized as “active,” “strong” and “industrious”, and the other people are not. All other human qualities are second to this classification of good and evil. For example, the possibility that people who are thin are perhaps self-absorbed, obsessive-compulsive, rich, vain, spoiled, unemployed, sports-fanatic, anorectic, or boring, or alternatively that thin people are creative, passionate, lively, intelligent, articulate, efficient, sensual and hard-working are not possibilities in the minds of dieticians (not that I’m saying that thin people are that way, of course, I’m just making a point…). Dieticians have divided the world. Thin are good and overweight are bad. That’s all there is to it.

The talkbacks to the article are also quite telling.

Stacy wrote of her doctor’s failure to see her as a whole person: “This study does not surprise me in the least. My doctor told me last week that I was ‘morbidly obese’ and that I needed to quit drinking sodas, quit eating cookies and quit eating cakes, despite the fact that I’ve already lost over 50 pounds and kept it off for the last two years. I only drink water and unsweetened tea. I don’t eat cookies or cakes. I go to the gym five times a week and even participate in classes like Spin and Body Pump. It upsets me that health professionals do not look more closely at their patients-they just take one look at you and make a judgment. I bet my doctor couldn’t keep up in Spin even if he tried. Skinny DOES NOT necessarily mean healthy!

Kit, in describing her loss of 100 pounds four years ago, wrote: “I also find that many, many people in other professions have biases against the obese. The way I am treated by others now versus five years ago is like the difference between night and day! I get a lot more respect from strangers and family alike! So, those training for a position in the medical field aren’t the only ‘guilty parties’ - biases of this type are rampant and compassion is in short supply everywhere.”

At the same time, though, other talkbackers justified the bias: Jonny, for example, wrote” Is it irrational and incorrect to draw conclusions from weight?” As if to say, the dieticians are right. Thin people are better. Hmmmm…..

So this is Western culture: Fat equals evil and thin equals pure and good. Doctors and nutritionists are among the many people who look at another person and see nothing but their hips, backsides, and their chins. If only people’s souls were as readily visible as their fat cells. Wouldn’t that be illuminating about humanity….

Life Lessons from Norma Hotaling, 57, Prostitute Turned Reformer

2008-12-25T04:19:31-06:00

The death of a former prostitute does not often merit public
attention. But then again, Norma Hotaling, who died this week at the
age of 57 from pancreatic cancer, was no ordinary former prostitute.
After twenty years of suffering in the sex trade industry, she not only
found the remarkable courage and strength to pull herself out of
devastating cycles of addiction, abuse and self-loathing, but she also
managed to create an organization, The SAGE Project of San Francisco (Standing Against Global Exploitation), that has saved the lives of hundreds of women and raised public and legislative awareness about the travesty that is the global sex trade industry. Oprah Winfrey made her part of the famous “Angel Network” for
her life’s work and accomplishments.

Human trafficking is an international crime generating more than US
$12 billion worldwide, according to the United Nations. More than
800,000 people are trafficked annually, forced into prostitution and
threatened with death should they attempt to escape the clutches of
their captors. According to Victor Malarek, author of The Natashas: Inside the Global Sex Trade, girls as young as 12 years old, especially from Third World and Eastern European countries, are often tricked into leaving their homelands with
dubious offers of jobs in modeling and other fields, or promises of
wealth and prosperity in other countries. Under these
false promises, they are sold into the sex trade by organized crime,
gangs, pimps and brothel owners, forced into situations in which “they
must submit, or they are raped, beaten and tortured,” he says. As
customers’ demands for slave trade workers who do not have HIV or AIDS
increases, the age of victims proportionally decreases. UNICEF claims
that approximately 1.7 billion children are victimized in this process
annually.

This topic should be of tremendous interest, especially in Israel,
which the lack of law enforcement on the issue has turned the country
into a paradise for international sex traders – and has forged a US$1
billion per year industry. According to a report released in 2005 by
the Knesset Subcommittee on Trafficking in Women, between 10,000 and
15,000 women had been smuggled into Israel over the previous four years
to work as prostitutes in more than 280 brothels in Tel Aviv alone.
There are an estimated 20,000 female sex slaves forced into
prostitution in Tel-Aviv each year paying for 45,000 acts of
prostitution every day. A woman, who is “purchased” at a public auction
for anywhere form $5,000 to $20,000, can have up to 25 “clients” a day.
Traffickers and pimps earn US $50,000 - $100,000 a year from each
prostituted woman.

According to the report, the women, who were mostly from the former
Soviet Union, are forced to work up to 18 hours a day and receive on
average only three percent of the money they earned from prostitution.
Most of the women had been smuggled over the Egyptian border and lured
from Russia and Eastern Europe on false promises of secretarial jobs,
and many were raped and beaten along the way. According to the Israel
News Agency:

These women, many from the former Soviet, are working as
prostitutes in a condition of virtual slavery. Many of the Russian
women who have ended up in Israel’s brothels, some smuggled into the
country from Egypt on the back of camels, expected to find jobs a
cleaners and or working in childcare. There are certain places where
auctions are taking place. The Israeli police well know the names. They
are nightclubs or regular bars. The women are brought there, buyers
come and look at their bodies and their teeth, then the bidding starts.
They are held by the pimps, beaten and totally isolated… They sleep in
shifts, four to a bed…They cannot walk freely. They cannot leave the
apartment as they wish. Usually the passports have been taken.

Until very recently, this topic was hidden in Israel, far from the
public eye and from governmental jurisdiction. The police was often
unable to do anything since Israel had no laws against human
trafficking or prostitution. According to Professor Ruth
Halperin-Kadari, author of Women in Israel: A State of their Own, there has been a steady increase in the number of women sold as sex slaves in Israel.

In 2000, the Knesset passed the Women’s Equal Rights Law, ruling
that anyone trading in human beings for prostitution or who forces a
human being to leave their country in order to deal with prostitution
can be sentenced to imprisonment. “Every woman has the right to be
protected against violence, sexual harassment, sexual abuse and the
trading of her body”.

The Israel Women’s Network, one of the founders of the Coalition
Against the Trafficking of Women, works on lobbying and advocacy on
behalf of the victims of sex trafficking. The coalition’s main
recommendations against the trafficking of women are:
· Investigating the lives of women who were sold into slavery
· Granting women fugitive status or find them an alternate country to immigrate to
· Establishing a safe shelter for the trafficked women
· Providing medical, psychological and legal aid.
· Individual care for women with special needs – eg, pregnant women, women addicted to drugs and minors.
· Involving the police in fighting the trafficking problem.
· Trafficked women are not to be released on bail by pimps.
· Compensating the victims as part of the criminal process.
· Providing a witness protection program for the trafficked women who agree to testify against those involved in trafficking.

The Knesset also established a parliamentary committee headed by MK
Zehava Galon to investigate the trafficking of women. During the
committee’s activities to eliminate the trafficking of women and aid
those who have been traded, it submitted a number of different bills
regarding the victims of trafficking. According to the IWN, the
committee has had the following legislative achievements:

· Determining the minimum punishment in cases of trafficking of women as imprisonment.
· Early testimony of a victim of human trafficking for the purpose of
prostitution, in order to enable the victim to return as soon as
possible to her country of origin.
· The right to an attorney form the civil legal aid to any victim of human trafficking for the purpose of prostitution.

There are also a number of bills that passed the preliminary
reading, and a few more that have not passed preliminary readings.
There is certainly a long way to go in Israel, but thanks to the hard
work of the IWN and the other groups in the coalition, there is finally
an address to turn to in hopes of protecting the victims. Social
services have also begun to get involved in different areas, thanks in
large part to more widespread media attention. Women are now recognized
as victims of this terrible industry, and are starting to receive some
of the help that they need.

Today, I would like to draw inspiration in this work from Norma
Hotaling. She fought tirelessly to bring change and awareness on behalf
of women in the sex trade. Thanks to her hard work and determination,
the State of California passed a 2004 law that allows prosecutors to
charge pimps and johns with child abuse if they prostitute a minor.
Norma Hotaling, in the words of her colleagues “was determined to make
it easier for other women, men and youth who wanted to leave the sex
trade and addiction behind, and find their way from the harsh effects
of sexual exploitation to restored wellness, confidence, vocation, and
overall wholeness.” That is a inspiring message for all of us.

Here are some more interesting links:

Obituary of Norma Hotaling

Some articles on the sex slave trade in Israel
http://www.venusproject.com/ethics_in_action/Israel_Sex_Slavery.html

http://www.iwn.org.il/innerEn.asp?newsid=171

http://www.fpp.co.uk/online/05/03/Israel_slavetrade.html

http://www.uri.edu/artsci/wms/hughes/israel.htm

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/4380067.stm

http://www.catwinternational.org/factbook/Israel.php

Women murdered because they are women

2008-11-24T07:24:24-06:00

Tuesday November 25 marks the International Day Against Violence Against Women.
This is a horrific and growing problem around the world. Know the
facts. Recognize the signs. You may be able to save the life of a woman
you love.

One sunny morning in the pastoral northern town of Tirat Hacarmel, Israel, Noga Gadi, a beautiful 30-year old woman was stabbed 32 times with a knife while
in her own home, by none other than her husband. When he was questioned
in court about his actions, the husband replied, “What’s the big deal?
It happens all the time in this country.”

Noga is one of 33 women who were murdered last year in Israel by their partners,
spouses or other family members – a figure up from 13 women in 2004.
The women range in age from 9 to 80, they come from all parts of
Israel, and all ethnic and socio-economic backgrounds. Violence against
women cuts across all sectors of society in Israel, and is a problem
that continues to be on the rise. While the murder of Ethiopian women
has increased over the past two years, and the honor killings of Arab and
Bedouin women is garnering public attention, it would be a mistake to
think that this is a problem only in those communities. This year’s
events have special significance for Israeli Anglos as one of the most
shocking and brutal murders of a Hila Fisher and her two babies was
carried out by her husband, Michael Fisher, not only considered an
“model citizen” and elite member of the Hod Hasharon police force, by
apparently all who knew the family, but also the son of British
immigrants. There is no profile of a wife murderer. The horrific
phenomenon is unfortunately everywhere.

The signs of domestic violence may be easy to miss. Women abused by
their husbands are often educated and seem to lead normal lives, with
neighbors so often claiming, ‘We had no idea.” The Fisher’s were
described as “a perfect family” by their neighbors.

But perfect families do not end up all dead. Murdered by the man of the house.

Know the signs. Superficial
impressions are not enough to diagnose patterns of abuse. The signs are
often subtle and can be mistaken for excessive doting or charm. A man
who is charismatic (and controlling), who likes his wife to dress well
for him (and tells her what to wear), who takes care of all the
finances (and does not let her control money), who distances her from
friends (“I’m all you need”) – these are just some of the signs that
all is not well in paradise.

In acknowledgment of the International Day against Violence Against Women on November 25, Dr. Yael Levine composed a Prayer for Women Murdered by their Husbands,
to be read in synagogues in order to raise awareness and alarm about
this increasing trend. Unfortunately, Levine says, there is some
objection to this among some men in the religious community who claim
that the issue is “marginal” with only a “small number” of women
affected by this. This is a false claim, and Levine finds the comment
“distressing.”

According to Anat Gur of the Anima Clinic for Women’s Psychological Health,
“Violence against women has reached epidemic proportions.” She cites
the UNIFEM study according to which one out of three women around the
world will be physically attacked by her partner in her lifetime.
Israeli women may fare slightly better than women around the world,
with an estimated one in seven women projected to be a victim of
violence at home in her life. But even this number of one in seven
should give us pause. Women in Israel continue to suffer physical
violence for the sole reason that they are women, and this is not a
problem that can or should be dismissed as marginal.

Here are some more vital statistics about violence against women:

· 21%-34% of all women will be physically hurt by their partners or spouses
· The majority of women who are murdered are murdered by their partners or spouses.
· 14%-25% of teenage girls have been raped, including a large portion
of girls with mental disabilities, as well as a large portion who were
drugged using so-called date-rape drugs
· Over 80% of working women experience sexual harassment at the workplace at least once in her professional career
· Since the 1990’s, Israel has become a hot spot for trafficking of
women. It is estimated that there are one million (!) visits with
prostitutes a month in Israel
· Since 2004, there has been a dramatic increase in reports of sexual attack, gang rape, and rape-incest

In short, the greatest threat of external physical harm to women
remains men women know intimately. Whereas men are most threatened by
strangers, women are most threatened by the men at home.

There is absolutely no difference between “ex” and “current” in the
threat to women by an abusive partner. Not only is the fact that a
woman leaves or divorces a man NOT a permanent deterrent, but
in fact the moment of exit is sometimes the most dangerous time in an
abused woman’s life. The threat of losing control can set an abusive
man off on murderous rampages. An estimated half of all murders of
women by their spouse/partner occur after the woman has left or declared an intention to leave.

It is during these moments of explosion that other members of a
woman’s family are at risk for their lives as well. This is why over
the past 3-4 years there has been a spurt of horrific murders that
include children and mothers — or neighbors — who were in the vicinity
of the woman, perhaps trying to protect her, while the man went on his
violent attack.

What is society’s role in this phenomenon? As soon as one of these
events occurs, if the murder does not receive unequivocal, visible,
system-wide demonization, it gains legitimacy by default. This is not
just about copy-cat actions. If a society does not take clear and
definitive actions to demonstrate loud and clear in no uncertain terms
that such behavior is unacceptable, then men — such as Ilan Gadi — feel
justified in killing their wives because “It is done”.

Praying is not enough. Know the signs. Teach your daughters. Watch out for your women friends.

Here is an incomplete list of women who were killed in Israel by the men in their lives since 2007:
Noga Gadi, 30, Tirat Hakarmel – suspect: husband Ilan Gadi
Natalia Shapiro, 25, Bat Yam – suspect: husband Hayim Valensko Shapiro
Galit Ratzabi, 25, Rehovot – suspect: ex-husband Rafael Ratazabi
Mazal Suleiman, 74, Jerusalem – suspect: ex-husband Nisim Suliman
Hamda Abu Jinam, 16, Ramle – suspect: brother Kamal Abu Jinam
Larisa Gumani, 53, Carmiel – suspect: stepbrother Sergei Gumani
Aya Papiashvili, 21, Ashdod – suspect: husband Henry Papiashvili
Miriam Kaufman, 67, Holon – suspect: husband Miron Kaufman
“Jane Doe”, 27, Abu-Ghosh – suspect: husband
Esther Levine, 51, Ramat Gan – suspect: neighbor Asael Muabri
Miriam Barod, 80, Kfar Rama – suspect: son in law Elias Barod
Varda Barod, 59. Kfar Rama – suspect: husband Elias Barod
Alexandra Steiner, 24 – suspect: john or pimp
Orit Saltzman Bar Yosef, 33, Pri Gan – suspect: husband Dudu Bar Yosef
Yishai Mabrat Ababa, 27, Beer Sheva – suspect: husband Asatzlin Ababa
Valentina Dumbiev, 24 – suspect: husband Iad Shami
Lilly Tzoref, 65, Rehovot – suspect: husband Itzik Tzoref
“Jane Doe”, 40, Givatayim – suspect: john or pimp
Fahima Perah, 82, Kfar Yasif – suspect: nephew Nabiya Perah
Kanu Gasasa, 29, Naharia – suspect: husband Babia Gasasa
Hiamanut Gasasa, 9, Naharia – suspect: father Babia Gasasa
Tchakula Tchakul, 45, Rishon L’zion – suspect: husband Parau Tchakul
Yaffa Rahabi, 47, Ariel – suspect: ex-husband
Hila Fisher, 30, Hod Hasharon – suspect: husband Michael Fisher
Yuval and Yarden Fisher, 1,3, Hod Hasharon – suspect: father Michael Fisher

May their memories be blessed. May the women of Israel know no more sorrow.

Getting Smart Women into Office in Israel

2008-10-25T14:00:47-05:00

I am thrilled to report that my friend Elise Rynhold is number five on
the list of the local Shahar party in Modi’in, Israel. That is reason enough
for me to vote for Shahar in the municipal elections in November.

Elise, a dynamic, super-intelligent, activist and energetic woman,
the kind of woman who knows how to get things done and has an amazing
head on her shoulders, has spent a good portion of her career in the
service of the Jewish people. But perhaps most importantly, she has
resisted the temptation that so many women have to sit on the sidelines
and watch others get elected. She has decided that women need
representation, and so she has thrown herself into the elections, front
and center.

Elise also represents a growing trend of increasing numbers of English speaking immigrants in Israel taking part in politics. The Ha’aretz newspaper quoted Elise in reporting on this trend last week.

Certainly representation for immigrants is important. But more than
that, I think that the election of women in city council elections is
critical. Women have real issues that are unlikely to be properly
addressed without having a powerful voice in place.

Marya Stark, a consultant on gender, politics and leadership, and co-founder and the Founding Executive Director of Emerge America, the premier national
training program for women Democrats, writes that while one issue
keeping women back is the “glass ceiling”, of no less importance is
what she calls the “pipeline” – that is, women in local city (and
state) government. Here is what she wrote recently in her blog, politics and leadership:

A new study suggests that may have less to do with the
glass ceiling than with the pipeline: too few women and minorities are
being appointed to top state jobs where they can get the experience and
the public attention to establish a political career…. The report, from
the Center for Women in Government and Civil Society at the State
University of New York at Albany, tallied how many women and minorities
were appointed by governors in the 50 states to leadership jobs between 1997 and 2007. The answer is: not enough. Of 1,834 top state jobs —
including advisers to governors, department and commission heads — 643 were held by female appointees, or about 35 percent of the total.
Minorities held less than 16 percent… For leaders to rise from the mix
that is America, governors need to cast a wider net for appointees
today.

I couldn’t agree more. A while back, I wrote about the frustration I experienced at a “women’s evening" for a local mayoral candidate (currently in the lead) whose idea of
helping women was extending school hours. While this is certainly an
important issue (for women AND men, but mostly for KIDS), he ignored
many important issues of real concern to women, such as, women’s
salaries, women’s representation in government and business, women’s
health, domestic violence, marriage and divorce in Israel, and
educational programs on gender, to name a few. But most importantly, he
did not address how many women he planned to include on his list. His
vision is to work as much as possible while his wife takes primary
responsibility for the kids. This was hardly a pro-women stance,
despite the extra school hours.

For women to achieve real change, they need to have a seat at the table and have their voices heard.

I realize that this is a difficult argument to make today. After
all, Eleanor Smeal of the Feminist Majority came out with a much
publicized letter explaining why she is supporting Obama
and not McCain/Palin. It is not enough for women to knee-jerk vote for
the “skirt”, she said. We have to vote on issues that benefit women.

While I, too, am supporting Obama at this point, it pains me to hear
Smeal say so emphatically that Obama is better for women than Palin. Sure, it’s
undoubtedly true in this case that Obama’s policies are better for
women. Of course, Obama is much better for America and for the world
than Palin. But the idea that I am counting on a man rather than a
woman to best represent the interests of women distresses me greatly.

Women need to have real power, a real say, to represent out own
interests. And this starts at the local level. As the old adage goes,
all politics are local.

Go Elise! Inspiration for us all!

Second -- make that third -- thoughts about Sarah Palin (and news of her pregnant daughter)

2008-09-01T13:41:41-05:00

My first reaction was of course, yay, someone is finally putting a
woman on the ticket. My second reaction was, hang on a minute, she is
conservative, pro-life, anti-environment, and maybe not so experienced,
although maybe I should support her anyway (see yesterday's post). Now
that Sarah Palin, after all of four days in the public eye, has dropped
this bombshell that her seventeen year old unwed daughter is having a
baby, I'm having a third reaction. And this one, folks, is not about
Palin but about the media.

If we thought they were hard on Hillary, my
God, get a load of the tomatoes flying now.

Within an hour of Palins' announcement about her daughter, the New York Times had
200 reactions to this news. Maybe two comments -- maybe -- actually
offered words of encouragement and support to Palin. Many were critical
of a conservative hypocrisy and the failure of education for
abstinence. But there were also many comments -- I couldn't tell if
they were from liberals or conservatives -- criticizing or even mocking
Palin as a mother.

How can a woman be both a mother and grandmother in office? asked a few.
She can't even control her own daughter! shouted another few.
Can't have a woman in office if she has too many children, was one particularly obnoxious comment.
What kind of VP will she be if she is such a terrible mother? came the refrain.

And so, here it comes again. The anti-woman backlash is just flying here.
How many male candidates have been scrutinized for their parenting, or
for their children's choices, or for how many children they have?
Answer -- none.

And how much has Palin been through over the past four days,
compared to Biden? Biden got a nod and a giggle, and was let be. But
Palin has been hacked to death, and she's just getting started. The
Huffington Post, which was notoriously anti-Hillary in some of the most
sexist ways, has run one attack after another, barely leaving readers
with a moment to breathe.

So now I'm thinking, how much of the negative reaction to Palin is
real, and how much is more of the same old sexism packaged as
"vetting"?

Let's give Palin a break, shall we? She is still Governor of Alaska,
she has still managed to achieve quite a lot while raising five kids,
and she is obviously smart and articulate.

And for the record, I think the way she is handling her daughter's
pregnancy is remarkable. She is supportive, kind, and loving, and has
committed herself to helping her daughter without putting her own life
on hold, going into hiding, or going into mourning. Personally, I give
her a lot of credit. And I sincerely hope that her party stands behind
her in this as well.

And that someone stands up to the male-chauvinist media. Give the Governor a little respect, please.

Sarah Palin: A View from Israel

2008-08-31T15:24:45-05:00

A political cartoon from today's Israeli newspaper, Yediot. As McCain marches with a bikini-clad "Miss Arkansa", Obama says to Biden "How do you look in a bikini?" Is this blatant sexism that turns a governor into a sex object reason enough to put a woman in (or near) the Oval Office?

This story is a classic example of what my father would call contrarian politics: i.e.,
The Republican Party beating the Democrats in getting a woman into the
Oval Office. Unbelievable, really. Just for the record, though, if
Sarah Palin gets elected, I would like history to show that Hillary
Clinton got her there. McCain would not have sought out Palin had
millions of women not spent the past year screaming for Hillary. It's
just a little sad to me that McCain was able to read the pulse of the
women of the country better than Obama. Or at least his advisors were.
Either McCain is a brilliant study of American society, or he's
brilliant at picking advisors. Whichever way, I have no doubt that
millions of American women who voted for Hillary are about to move over
to McCain. If the elections were to be held tomorrow, McCain would win
in a landslide. And I completely sympathize.

So are we women that fickle and predictable? Is gender no more than a knee-jerk response? Mea culpa.
Personally, when I first heard about Sarah Palin, I was genuinely
excited. And considering that I am most decidedly in the "undecided"
camp since Hillary dropped out, this decision most certainly has the
potential to woo me over to McCain. She's eloquent, confident,
powerful, active, and manages to be a dynamic leader while raising five
kids. Yeah, I really want to see some of that in our elected officials.
It would make me feel represented a little. Like someone up there has a
clue about what life is really like for 50% of the population. Yes, a
woman on the ticket attracts me, that's for sure.

But my readiness to go Republican for Palin is a little bit
depressing when I think about all the things that she stands for. Aside
from the whole fishing, hunting, and oil-drilling culture that I don't
buy into at all, aside from her support for a bizarre animal called
"Feminists for Life" -- women against abortion with some twisted
as-if-feminist thinking -- aside from all that, Palin is effectively a
beauty queen who has gotten ahead mostly on her charm and good looks.
Oh, and by the way, her predecessors were completely corrupt. Yeah.
Pretty woman versus ugly, selfish old man. For Alaska she was a
no-brainer.....

The problem really is that Sarah Palin is no Hillary Clinton. I
wanted Hillary not just because she is a woman but because she is the
best person, by far, for the job.

Certainly Palin is very smart and savvy. And she's apparently a
terrific governor for Alaska. And she may be good for Israel, though
nobody really knows. And she seems like she's a good mother, and is
caring and sweet and capable of doing the juggling that so many of us
struggle with. For sure, in Alaska they love her -- much the way so
many Americans love Obama.

Palin is proof, like Obama, that it helps when smart people also
look good on camera, never mind what they actually believe in. I think
this election will go down in history as the victory of celebrity over
substance.

So who is Sarah Palin and what does she stand for? Here are some
items from Wikipedia, apparently written by "little Trig" (not the four
month old, but clearly someone in the Palin camp) [Hat tip -- Onedia
Hayes Sylvest on Blogher]:
v In favor of repealing Roe Wade
v In favor of the death penalty
v In favor of oil drilling in the Arctic and for off shore drilling
v On the board of the NRA and strongly supports the NRA's gun stance
v Against federal government putting polar bears on the threatened species list so not to endanger drilling in the Arctic
v Believes that global warming is NOT man-made and that reports on global warming are unreliable
v In favor shooting wolves from helicopters as a predator control measure
v Against any systematic plan to provide health care to all
v In favor of protecting fishing even if that jeopardizes wildlife
v Opposes stem cell research

Oh, and by the way, she successfully accumulated a $20 million long-term debt for her town of 9,000 while mayor.

So, whom would I prefer, a candidate who is a woman, or a candidate
who implements policies that are good for women (and the rest of the
world…)?

I come back, once again, to my Bill Clinton question. Bill was
undoubtedly one of the worst presidents when it comes to how he treats
women. Ironically, one of my biggest issues with Hillary is that she is
still married to Bill, and still thinks of him as a political asset.
But that said, Bill’s record of policies that benefit women is pretty
good. He may have been a creepy date, but he was an excellent president
for women.

How do I reconcile that? Will I vote for McCain because someone
around his table understands that women have some important
contributions to make to politics? Or do I vote for Obama, despite the
way he dissed Hillary, despite the deriding way Biden refers to his wife, because in the big picture, Democrats are better for women and for society?

Right now, judging by today's Yediot, which has a cartoon of Palin in a bikini, I may vote for Palin just to protest men in the media. Yuk!

But I don't know if that's the best idea, really. I don’t know. I
think I’m back to being undecided….But at least I had a split second
moment there of being, well, almost excited.

When the personal is political, and not the other way around...

2008-08-24T06:33:03-05:00

Rebecca Waring, Washing Dishes www.rebecca-waring.com

7:30
PM, Wednesday night, as I roll up my sleeves to tackle the sink full of
dishes, my head is stacked with all sorts of political questions: Am I
using too much water? Is the detergent environmentally friendly? Is the
municipality going to change the rates on water after the elections?
Did we feed the leftovers to the cat? Did anyone feed the Chinese
workers down the road?

The notion that our everyday decisions have political
implications is one of the great contributions of feminism. The phrase
“the personal is political” was coined by Carol Hanisch her 1969 essay
called "The Personal is Political" (Redstockings collection “Feminist
Revolution”, March 1969), that defends consciousness-raising against
the charge that it is "therapy." Hanisch states, "One of the first
things we discover in these groups is that personal problems are
political problems.” This is one of those amazing insights that make
you wonder why it had to be created in the first place. It is an
understanding of the world and life that continues to ring true on an
everyday basis, providing me with a profound framework with which to
makes sense of some of life’s most challenging encounters.

But I think that the idea of “the personal is political” is
sometimes misconstrued. Because actually, most of those nagging
questions from the kitchen sink fit better into the category of “the
political is personal.” That is, it’s the taking of a large political
issue and giving it an interpretation in every day life. That’s noble,
but that’s not the main point. I think a more accurate way to do “the
personal is political” is to ask a different question: Why the hell am I the one cleaning
up from dinner? When so many people ate, why am I doing this alone,
serving everyone else’s needs, while they all have an entitlement of
leisure? Why is my labor worth less? Why is my pleasure not valued?
What political forces promoted so effectively this notion that I, the
woman in the house, should take responsibility for everyone’s mess? Now
THAT is an example of where the personal is political. Of taking my
existing life and saying, there is an entire political structure that
takes shape in my everyday life. My personal life is a function of the
political order.

Helping other women –and men – in this consciousness raising is very
important to me, and I spend quite a bit of time and energy on it in a
variety of different forums. But it’s not always easy. Not everyone
wants their consciousness raised – even women, even if it will
radically improve their lives, maybe because it threatens to change
their lives. It’s a tough thing.

Once, I was told something like this: “You only like people who are
feminists. You make your personal decisions based on your politics”.
That was a very difficult accusation for me to hear. It’s the misguided
“the political is personal” notion. As if my personal decisions are
based on my politics.

This is not only untrue, but it’s actually the opposite of the way I
live my life. I don’t make my personal decisions based on my politics –
I make my political decisions based on my personal experiences.

I am a feminist because of life. I am a feminist because of all the
crappy things that I’ve seen women go through because they’re women –
some of it on my own skin. I live the life of a female, I know the pain
of the world, and feminism is a political response to human suffering.
It’s that simple. I don’t build friendships with reflective women
because I’m a feminist. I’m a feminist because watching women lead
oppressed and disempowered lives saddens and angers me. I am a feminist
because women’s inability to challenge their disempowerment is a
function of political processes that disempower women. Because women
who are in oppressive and abusive situations need a larger language for
support that will give them the power and wisdom to exit their bad
relationships – whether with parents, partners, bosses or even friends.
I am a feminist because my personal life dictates that either I fight
the political fight for change or dwell in a horrible world. I choose
to fight.

That’s what it means that the personal is political. I channel my
frustration with life’s pain and injustices into a larger political
effort to make change. I write this blog. Maybe someone will read it
and it may just make a difference.

Men and the "F" Word (it's not what you think)

2008-08-15T08:31:45-05:00

What is it about the word “feminism” that makes some women squirm and some men shudder? Even people who believe in much of what feminism stands for – human dignity for all, repairing social injustices, offering equal opportunities and respect for women – often prefer not to call themselves feminists. Why is that?

I thought about this recently as I read a blog by 22-year old Kim Gouz, published in last week's Haaretz, in which she describes her transition from American non-feminist to Israeli feminist. Her lovely essay, in which she chronicles shocking encounters with one injustice after another in Israel, the journey that has eventually led her to adopt this admirable pose, opens with a statement that is nonetheless jarring to those of us who have been there for some time already:

“I was not the pro-choice pushing, anti-pornography ranting, condom-dispersing type.”

So that is what I am? Ranting and standing on street-corners in a plastic costume resembling male genitals? The only epithet missing from this vivid description is the all-time favorite ‘feminazi’….

Already by the 1990’s, Susan Faludi, her book Backlash: The Undeclared War Against Women, brilliantly documented in the anti-feminist sentiment spilling across American and influencing politics and popular media. It is astounding the extent to which political leaders will vilify women activists in order to protect their own hinds. Faludi, whose investigative skills are unparalleled, eloquently illustrates that this backlash against feminists is extreme, purposeful, and beyond anything that exists in other political discourses. When it comes to women’s issues, the personal is political indeed.

More recently, a fascinating study came out in 2005 issue of Gender and Society, examining the incongruity between people’s beliefs about gender and their self-identification as feminists. Janice McCabe, in “What’s in a Label? The Relationship between Feminist Self-Identification and "Feminist" Attitudes among U.S. Women and Men”, argues that people’s reluctance to identify as feminists stems in part from the anti-feminist backlash (who wants to join ‘feminazis?’), in part from the image of feminists as radicals and militants, and in part, ironically, from the fact that young women are so successful in their lives that feminism is not relevant to them. In other words, feminism has done such a good job at improving women’s lives in America – in spite of the challenging political conditions – that young women, like Kim Gouz, have no need for or interest in feminism. This latter theory may find some anecdotal evidence in Gouz’s personal journey. When smart young women encounter head-on those shocking phenomena that feminists have been ranting about for two generations now, they, too, may find themselves shouting. It's interesting, really. If I think about myself in my early twenties, my journey into feminism was probably not that much different from Kim's.

I’ve done some work on this issue of feminist self-report in the context of research I’m conducting on Jewish masculinities. I’ve interviewed some 50 religious men about issues of identity, gender, religion, and relationships. So far I’ve found a similar reluctance among many men – even men who are promoting women’s equality in their daily lives – to call themselves feminists. Thankfully, though, it is not the case for all men. I have spoken to some inspiring folk who dare to be fully feminist and who are completely dedicated to fairness and justice between the genders. One such man, we’ll call him ‘Azriel’ from LA, is so passionately feminist that he has spent much of his volunteer time protesting for not only women’s rights but also gay and lesbian rights. He does this neither as a woman nor as a homosexual, but just as a person who believes that this is what human beings ought to be doing in their lives. He believes, in fact, that this is God’s work. I couldn’t agree more.

It was so deeply inspiring to me that I wanted to share here some of his words:

"I think it's our responsibility to teach our sons to be feminists, and I think it's our responsibility to teach straight people to be advocates for everybody who is another. But it goes beyond that. It's our lives that are enriched with everybody who is fully engaged. I mean, we'll be a stronger community if everybody feels that they have a place in it. I want people to be able to bite onto as much as they want to bite into”

Thank you Azriel, for giving us words of hope.

You Want that Degree? Sleep with the Professor!

2008-08-10T09:07:14-05:00

You Want that Degree? Sleep with the
Professor

I will never forget the day I first learned that no matter how much I
develop my mind, to some people I am just a woman.

The year was 1996, I was a young, obviously naïve, master’s student in
Jewish education at Hebrew University in Jerusalem, Israel, and my adviser suggested that I meet with
a certain professor – call him Y – about taking a tutorial with him. Since I was
nearly done with my coursework, starting my thesis and in need of some specific
guidance as well as two course points, this seemed like a reasonable plan. But
as I sat there with Y, trying to make this arrangement, he had different ideas.

“What does your husband do?” he asked after I described my work to him.
Taken aback and unsure where he was heading, I replied simply that my spouse was
in marketing.

“But what is his degree in?” he persisted.

“Psychology,” I said. Hmm. He sat there and contemplated this.

“But doesn’t he want to go into Jewish education?” I said, no, not really,
and tried to steer the conversation back to me – after all, I was the
one working in Jewish education, I was the master’s student, and I
was the one waiting for guidance, not my husband. Turns out, this
professor guy was on the payroll of someone somewhere in the Jewish world
searching for candidates for a turbo career track in Jewish education. So we sat
there for 15 minutes as he asked me about my husband and ignored my requests for
attention. Rather than see me as my own person, a potential student and
educator, he saw me only as wife of someone with potential, even if my
husband, whom he never met, had absolutely no connection to or interest in the
subject. When Y realized that my husband was of no use to him, the conversation
was over. We never even discussed the tutorial. I left feeling completely
invisible, non-existent. When all was said and done, I was nothing more than a
woman.

This is unfortunately one of many disillusioning experience I’ve had at
Hebrew U and other institutes of higher education in Israel. The culture of
exploitation, back-stabbing, self-serving, intellectual theft, and cut-throat
competition saturates universities in Israel, frequently reaching appalling
degrees. I could probably write a book about this culture based solely on my own
accumulated experiences from 13 years as a graduate student and employee. But
for women at the university, this ruthless culture is compounded by the inherent
sexism that is entrenched in every corner of the institution, a sexism so
cemented that only women who are savvy about navigating its pitfalls ever really
get ahead.

This shocking reality is finally starting to come to light, through not
without some painful casualties. Over the past few weeks, women have started to
speak up about the most horrific forms of aggression and manipulation around,
including their “sleep with me to get your degree” situations. Last week,
Ma’ariv published interviews with ten women filing formal complaints
about Eyal Ben Ari from the sociology and
anthropology department, who was recently arrested for sexual
misconduct, and since then additional stories about other male
professors are finally coming to light.

These stories have prompted other women, those who have seemingly fought
the system and won, to speak out as well. Prof. Orit Kamir wrote a sharp essay
about the dynamics involved in manipulations by
male professors of female students, and explained the complexities of
how women get trapped. Dr. Naama Carmi offers a brilliant textual analysis of
the reply of senior administration, revealing how
the powers that be come to support abusive practices. The Ben Ari
affair may potentially become a watershed event, with the dam protecting men
finally breaking down.

But not all is good news. This weekend, Ha’aretz reported that
following the university’s ongoing ineptitude in dealing with issues of sexual
harassment and the status if women at university,
the Committee on Gender Issues is breaking up. Professor Rachel Elior, one of the senior women at
Hebrew U, resigned, because, she said, “we feel there is no way to change the
university’s discriminatory policy.” Patriarchy is so deeply embedded that the
struggle is getting nowhere. After four years, the committee has given up
hope.

Indeed, the statistics about women at universities paint a pretty gloomy
picture. According to Nina Toren, author of Women in Israeli Academy:
Images, Numbers, Discrimination (2005), there is an inverse pyramid in the
progress of women in academia. That is, while there are more bachelors’ degree
students than men, at each level of advancement, men progressively outnumber
women. That is 26.2% of lecturers are women, 36.8% of senior lecturers are
women, 21% of professors are women, and a mere 16% of senior professors are
women. In other words, women are consistently passed over for advancement, at
each stage of their career development.

Professor Elior, the head of the Department of Jewish Thought at Hebrew
University, is both a role model for women on getting ahead, and an example of
the struggle of women to get noticed. Elior is a brilliant scholar with an
unparalleled amount of knowledge at her fingertips, a woman who can give a
riveting two-hour lecture without a single note, wrote ten books on different
periods of Jewish mystical creativity, edited five books, authored some hundred
scholarly articles, and won some of the most prestigious international prizes
for her work, including the Friedenberg Award of Excellence of the Israel
National Academy of Sciences and Humanities, Beracha-Yigal Alon Prize for
Academic Excellence, AVI Fellowship - Geneva, Warburg Prize, Federman
Foundation, State University of New York Research Foundation, The Littauer Fund,
Oxford Jerusalem Trust Visiting Fellowship, Wolfson Foundation and Memorial
Foundation for Jewish Studies Fellowship, and The Israel Academy of Sciences and
Humanities Gershom Scholem Prize for Research in Kabbalah.

Impressive, indeed – but trying to get men to notice is a problem. I cannot
count how many times an all-male faculty or all-male presenters were justified
on the grounds of "There are no women of high enough calibre." It's not that
women are not good enough -- it's that good women are not
valued enough.

In a recent encounter of this type, I sat in the office of a director of a
center for Jewish education who runs seminars for principals. I pointed out to
him the dominance of men as lecturers for the principals in his program – even
men who were barely out of school themselves or had questionable experience.
None of the lecturers in his roster comes anywhere close to Elior’s knowledge,
eloquence and scholarly achievements. But they are, for the most part, men. In
fact, in a book they published to compile lectures from these seminars, not
one woman writer is included. The director’s response to my comment was
classic, “There are not enough women qualified to teach the principals.” I told
him that I could easily provide a list of very well-qualified women. "Like who?"
He asked. I actually mentioned Professor Elior, whom I had recently had the
privilege of hearing. “Who is she?” he asked, and clearly had never heard of
her. Later that day, I emailed him a list with the names and titles of over 30
senior female scholars who have knowledge and experience in areas of Jewish
thought and education, women who Jewish educators should find fascinating.
“Thanks,” was the email I received in reply, and as far as I know, that was the
end of the conversation.

Women academics have serious reason for concern. If after all these years,
Professor Elior has given up hope, what will be for the rest of us? Women, it
seems, have to keep fighting in order to be respected for our work. Maybe if
women continue to speak up, we will eventually be seen and heard for who we
really are.

Oh, and anyone who wants that list of top women,
I'm happy to share.

Women in Israeli Politics: Still a long way to go, Baby

2008-08-04T05:44:53-05:00

The year 2008 may be remembered as an almost historical year for women. Hillary Clinton almost won the US elections,
an event that may yet be followed by an event such as "Tzippi Livni
almost won the Israeli elections". Livni has yet to wrest the Kadima
leadership from the hands of the latest military non-hero in politics,
Shaul Mofaz. Then, even if she wins, she will have to lead Kadima in
keeping its already specious political presence through the next
general election. In short, there is hope for a new role for women in
Israeli government -- but Livni has a long way to go.

One of the greatest obstacles to Livni’s success is undoubtedly the
entrenched masculinity not only of the political system, where women retain in a pathetically tiny proportion of Knesset seats,
ministerial posts and mayoral positions (Dalia Itzik notwithstanding,
who, like Livni, forms the exception that proves the rule). However,
there are other sources of entrenched patriarchy that Livni will have
to battle. One, that was demonstrated starkly this past weekend, is the
almost complete domination of men in the role of political
commentators. How is Livni expected to demonstrate female support when
women are hardly even given the chance to publicly air their opinions?

I am referring here to the print newspapers, each of which unleashed
its cadre of writing stars to comment on Olmert’s dramatic announcement
of resignation last week. Haaretz offered its readers six
essays analyzing this event, and every single one of them was written
by a man (Barak Ravid, Yossi Sarid, Jonathan Lis, Amir Oren, Yossi
Vertner and Aluf Benn, in case you were wondering). Same with the Jerusalem Post, which over the course of two days gave us Calev Ben David, Herb Keinon and Dan Izenberg with political commentary on the event. Yediot Aharonot was
the most ambitious of the lot, and the best for women. Of the nine
essays listed on its front page, two were by women – Sima Kadmon and
Ariella Ringel-Hoffman. Such proportions (22%) hardly create balance,
and yet these are the figures that women are faced with. We are 50% of
the population, but we are meant to feel grateful when we get 22%
representation in voice or in leadership.

This is particularly significant when we consider the type of
coverage Livni has received as well. So far, she is being criticized
for being too reticent and too passive. It’s ironic that in the face of
the most corrupt, self-serving and words-only government this country
has ever seen, the person who offers a completely different model of
leadership is seen as “too different.” Livni has managed to do her job
quietly and cleanly, but the pundits are going to have to find
something to put her down. Livni is in a classic
damned-if-you-do-damned-if-you-don’t position.

Women in Israel have to figure out a way to be seen and heard
publicly. This coming election may offer us an opportunity to speak
out, and to finally be represented by a woman. I hope Livni has the
courage to speak her mind, act in justice, and fairly represent both
women and men. And I hope the people of Israel have the courage to follow her.

Madonna and Me

2008-07-20T13:24:27-05:00

Like many other women, I imagine, I have a love-hate relationship with Madonna. Some days I find her liberating and inspiring, while at other times, well, I guess I'm just jealous. For sure, Madonna gets women thinking and talking about themselves. But recently, I must say, I have been just a little disappointed.

The liberating part of Madonna’s persona comes from her uncanny ability to disregard social convention. She decides for herself was is right and appropriate for her as a person, as a human, as a woman – and always manages to brilliantly defend herself, often in the face of severe opposition. Fundamentalists of all major religions in a few different continents have called for banning her music and her concerts – and it all merely strengthens her resolve. Madonna has something to say and she says it, with her entire body and soul, and to hell with institutions. I’ll bet we all wish we had some more of that in our lives, the ability to say to society: I don’t care what you want me to be, because I have my own ideas. How Madonna has managed to be so successful while bucking almost every social norm is frankly, empowering.

I also love how freely Madonna evolves. Madonna invented the reinvention. She goes from pop dancer to children’s book author, kissing Britney Spears one night and launching lessons in Kabbalah the next night. Only Madonna can do all that without feeling conflicted. Like I heard her say in one interview, “You can be spiritual and still have sexy lingerie.” Only Madonna. It’s not just how fluid she is with her value system – it’s also that she allows herself to go with what she feels is right. Her apparent sincerity in addressing real issues such as motherhood, spirituality, and poverty in Africa, offers a rich example of living and learning.

Of course, not all women agree with this. Susan Bordo, in her extraordinary book Unbearable Weight on gender in popular culture, notes that even as Madonna bucks trends, she also sets them. She is hardly one to appear overweight or less than perfectly in place, and her standards of fitness are far beyond what most women are capable of achieving.

Moreover, Bordo brilliantly shows that in the ongoing dispute between feminism and post-modernism over fluidity of values, Madonna offers a case in point about the limits of post-modernism. That is, whereas post-modernism says, pretty much, all values are equally legitimate, feminism argues that there are certain values that are more legitimate than others – i.e., “equality” is a core value and “patriarchy” is not. Madonna, in promoting a very post-modernist example of all values being equally legitimate, uses bondage, for example, as sexual play, and generally uses her body as a commercial tool. Not sure that I would consider these values equal to, say, love and commitment. When it comes to values, Madonna goes anywhere and everywhere, and that’s not necessarily good for women, or other people.

Recently, my awe of Madonna has waned. It began when she said last year, “There’s nothing sexy about turning 50.” Hmmm…. I would have thought that the woman who can be anything would find a way to be sexy at 50 – if anyone can, Madonna can. This anti-aging attitude has taken over her professional work as well: her new songs are bland rehashes of music from 20 years ago, which she sings with a guy half her age. I certainly don’t expect Madonna to be a prude, but it’s just a little gross. And some of the sounds in “Four minutes” come straight out of her old songs. It’s just not all that impressive, and possibly a little sad. She seems to be obsessing about reclaiming her twenties, and that’s just a shame. She was doing so well evolving.

Frankly, I think that her uber-youth as it were is damaging to women. The admiration bordering on jealousy that women feel when encountering such an undamaged, unaffected, non-aged woman has a heavy price. I really think that the increasing rates of anorexia in women over forty are related to women like Madonna who keep us insistently defying nature. Even at an age when we are supposed to be getting comfortable with ourselves, we are stuck trying to be something else. Will women never get a break!?

I’m going to be turning 40 next year, and I would like 40 to have its own meaning. I don’t want to be 20 anymore, or 16. I don’t want to be idolizing rock stars and trying to pretend my body hasn’t given birth a few times. I want to be able to tell the difference between my daughter and myself. I am the one who has been through life. I am the one who has some knowledge, some wisdom, and some experience. And I think that women over 40 can certainly be sexy and sensual and beautiful, but not by looking like a twenty-year old.

Madonna, you have disappointed me. You were doing so well, seeking spirituality and meaning and allowing yourself to become older and wiser. I wish you would stop trying to be something you used to be and allow yourself to be the incredible woman you have become. Then you will go back to being a role model for me.