In the past few months, a number of fitness bloggers have tried kettlebells for the first time and given them a positive review. I wanted to try them for myself, but the biggest obstacle holding me back was a possible risk of injury -- a few of the bloggers, like Workout Mommy and MizFit, initially tried kettlebells by following instructions on a DVD. I wasn’t ecstatic about this option because 1) even though there are lot of people who like working out with DVDs, I’ve never been able to get excited about fitness via my TV screen; and 2) there would be no way to get feedback on my form if I did something incorrectly.

Enter the solution: Workout Mommy/Lisa decided to step away from her DVD and take a group kettlebell class. (She lives not far from me in northern Virginia, but we’ve only met in person when we both attended the BlogHer conference in San Francisco.) I read about her positive experience with the class and thought, Eureka! There had to be someone there who could tell me what to do and make sure I didn’t injure myself. Perfect solution!

I visited the Giryafit website (girya is another term for kettlebell) and emailed Justin Case, the owner/instructor. I told him I was a complete beginner and asked which class I should take (I didn’t want to inadvertently show up to an advanced class and slow everyone down). He recommended a one-on-one session before joining a regular group class -- he’d teach me the basics, and it would be a lot easier to keep an eye on me if there weren’t other people vying for his attention.

So yes, for the first time in my life I hired a fitness professional to give me a private lesson. I knew within the first few minutes that I’d made the right decision. Some people are able to see something demonstrated on TV, or hear instructions, and replicate it perfectly the first time they try. That person isn’t me, or at least not when it comes to certain things. And this was one of those things.

A kettlebell is a weight with a handle, you say. You just flip it and swing it around. How hard can it be? Plenty, actually. You really have to pay attention to what you’re doing, at least in the beginning when you’re getting used to it. (Dumbbells, on the other hand, seem a bit more straightforward -- the motion is basically up and down and you're not supposed to do crazy swinging things with them.)

There’s this one move (I apologize, I was told the names but I’ve already forgotten them -- they include terms such as “press” and “clean” and “jerk”) that I must have attempted at least fifteen times before Justin finally said, “Good.” (And then I proceeded to do it incorrectly another five times before I did it correctly once again, but...baby steps, people.) I don’t know about you guys, but when I’ve attempted something so many times before I get it right? It’s a huge sense of accomplishment when I finally do.

I must admit, I was more nervous about taking this class than I was about trying belly dancing, or krav maga, or strip aerobics. And yes, I know why. It’s the first time I would be learning something new while in a one-on-one setting. In a group class, it’s a lot easier to blend in with the crowd.

I’d read Justin’s bio before class, which factored into my initial feeling of intimidation. I wasn’t sure what to expect. Since he spent six years training Marines, would he be all gruff and military-professional? As it turns out, he’s nothing like that -- I even got him to laugh at some of the silly things I said (I tend to do that when I’m nervous). Most importantly though, he was never impatient. Like I said, I had to do some of the moves numerous times. He would demonstrate them over and over and talk me through them until I finally got it right. That’s why I’m 100% sure I made the right decision to take a private session rather than trying to follow a DVD.

(I would also like to point out that this Saturday, Justin will participate in a regional North Face Endurance Challenge where he will run 50 miles. Good Lord. That distance is so far from what I can fathom that it’s almost unbelievable.)

This is what Workout Mommy/Lisa said about her experience with the class that made me want to try it:

I liked [Justin’s] no-nonsense approach to fitness, at one point he said “You shouldn’t even hear the music because you are working so hard”.

Now THAT is my kind of trainer!

I don’t want fluff; I want someone to push me past my comfort zone and help me get results! My DVDs are wonderful, but nothing beats being in a live class with someone telling you to go faster and stronger for the next 10 minutes. [...]

If you are new to kettlebell training, I definitely recommend taking a class in person for that very reason. I thought my form was great, but after Justin made a few adjustments, I could clearly tell a difference.

Fitarella interviewed a “kettlebell king” and shares what she likes about them.

The philosophy of the training is centered around core training movements, burns fat efficiently, is versatile and creates a displaced center of gravity thereby increasing the difficulty. There’s no half-assing it here…you HAVE to engage those muscles and work! This appeals to me because I want functional strength and muscle endurance. I want to be strong-strong!

Rose tried a kettlebell DVD and was annoyed with it. (I can relate. Listening to the same person say the same things over and over, especially if the person was doing or saying something annoying, wouldn’t be a lot of fun.)

First off, at the end of each exercise, she cuts to the break by saying something like, "Now go have a wittle sip of water..." with a very sing-songy voice that makes me feel like she's addressing a 4 yr old. WTF? Don't make me throw this kettlebell at the TV. [...]

I don't mean to be harsh. The workouts are good. She seems like a nice person and I'd love to take her live class some day. I just don't think that some of these instructors realize that many of us do these workouts repeatedly. And those little cutesy things that might seem fun once, just turn into huge grating annoyances over time.

Meaghan Elliot is a photographer who uses kettlebells, and she says this about the workout:

They are certainly not for the faint of heart. If you want to do kettlebells you have to be mentally tough and ready for a hard workout, but the results are amazing!

Tracy Erbeck describes a kettlebell swing.

The swing involves grabbing the weight with both hands (can be done single handed), swinging between your legs and raising it up to shoulder height. It ends up taking a lot of hip motion, and the more "pop" you give it, the easier it will be to keep swinging the thing. I love the KB swing, I love the way it makes my shoulders twitch and my inner thighs hurt when I'm done!

Tess planned to have a “lazy” kettlebell workout at home and ended up with more than she bargained for.

This past Saturday, I decided I didn't want to go to the gym and that I'd be "lazy" and stay home and do a kettlebell circuit for 30 minutes while watching the Red Sox get their arses handed to them. That's basically 30 straight minutes of minor squatting and swinging around 15 solid pounds of iron. Throw in some pushups and lunges and stuff, and you know what you get two days later? That's right, Tight Biker Shorts of Pain. I had a good 4 mile run on Sunday, but that didn't really help the TBSoP sitch. Currently I am hobbling around like an old cowboy. Stretching would probably be a good idea, I should get on that.

Jen is thinking about becoming a certified kettlebell instructor.

Greg and I talked tonight and I want to become a RKC. Maybe it's the Olympic spirit that's got a hold of me, but I don't think so... I've liked KB's from the start and having a goal for me is a good thing...besides just losing weight and getting and staying healthy.. I want to be a part of the kettlebell generation and be able to help others to use and love kettlebells.

I will definitely be using kettlebells again. Has anyone else tried them? Like or dislike? Did you teach yourself? Use a DVD? Take a class?

(Contributing editor Zandria blogs regularly at Zandria.us.)

Another misconception: I’ve read various reviews of cardio striptease DVDs, and a few people have commented that it wasn’t a good cardio workout. I actually went to the class thinking, “Oh, I’m not expecting this to wear me out.” Now that the class is over, what would I like to say to those people? Throw out those DVD and get yourselves to this class, or one that’s similar in your area.

Strip Aerobics at The P Spot not only busted the myth that striptease isn’t a real workout, but there was never a single moment where I felt self-conscious. “Never?” you ask. NEVER. How can that be? I was too busy trying to keep up! And so was everybody else. We were too busy trying to do the moves correctly to worry about checking each other out (much less worrying about critiquing each other).

So what did we do? There were a lot of squats. We did squats with and without the use of a pole (there were a number of poles scattered throughout the room because they also offer Pole Fit classes there). We would hold a squat as we bounced our booties back and forth and up and down. We would squat, then open our knees wide and bring them back together again (this is called a “butterfly”). Stand up, repeat. Hurt.

In addition to the squats, there were various shimmying moves and also an ab component at the end. (Who knew you could work your abs in a sexy way? It’s all in the way you flex your toes, reach with your arms, and trail your hands oh-so-seductively down your legs.)

Whenever we had a short break, my fellow students and I would look at each other in sweaty amazement. Oh my God, we mouthed. We had no idea what we were getting ourselves into.

The P Spot is located on the bottom floor of a row house in DC, an unassuming place directly across the street from a large church. In order to read the small sign posted on the door that lets you know you’ve arrived at the right place, you have to climb the flight of stairs that leads to the front porch. (My friend Jen took the class, too. She writes for the DC Examiner and wrote an excellent article about her experience with the class, including a profile of our awesome and ultra-fit instructor, Michaela.)

Michaela wore a pair of clear stiletto heels with tiny lights inside that blinked on and off. She also had a selection of red heels for rent (which a few ladies were brave enough to try), but I decided to forego that option. Other things to note: only women are allowed inside while classes are taking place and the doors remain locked.

If you’re still skeptical about the cardio aspect of the class? Here’s photo evidence of Jen and me (ultra-sweaty!) after the class was over.

Have you tried strip aerobics? Or would you?

Related Reading:

Charlotte at The Great Fitness Experiment has taken Zumba and TurboKick, both of which include provocative moves.

Fit Bottomed Girls reviewed Carmen Electra’s Aerobic Striptease: Vegas Strip.

Chaos Noir disagrees with teaching pole dancing to young kids. (I totally agree with her.)

Jezebel: Pole Dancing Workout Stories Will Not Die

CNN: Pole Dancing Helps Strip Off Pounds

NY Times: From the Erotic Domain, an Aerobic Trend in China

(Contributing editor Zandria recently attended a Biker Bash and regularly blogs at Zandria.us.)

I really am awed by it. The relentless training, the strict nutritional guidelines, the single-minded focus required so that nothing gets in the way of their goals. I think the reason I'm so impressed by it is because I don't quite understand it. It’s impossible to relate unless you’ve experienced something similar yourself. You may have the physical capability to be the best in your sport, but reaching the performance level of most Olympic athletes would be impossible without the determination required to make it happen.

Although I find it commendable that someone could be so completely dedicated to a goal, I don't know if I'd ever want to be able to relate to Olympians to that extent. While it might be nice to feel so strongly about something -- to love something and be really good at it -- a lot of that success is due to other things having been given up. Relationships. Free time. The sacrifices are worth it to some people, but I don’t love any sport or hobby so much that I’d want to devote a majority of my waking hours to it.

I would, however, be okay with a stronger level of determination than I have right now. I've often thought that if I were more determined, it would be easier for me to set more difficult fitness goals for myself. Maybe I wouldn’t still be struggling to complete 10 standard push-ups in a row. Maybe I’d be closer to my unassisted pull-up goal.

A friend of mine who reads my personal blog told me not long ago that I seem almost surprised when I accomplish a goal that I've set for myself. In her words:

You still seem somewhat surprised at yourself when you accomplish goals, but the kind of goals you have set for yourself are entirely within your control. You just have to plan what you need to do reach your goal, and then do it. There's no magic to it. "Plan your work and work your plan" -- best advice I ever got.

She’s right. Although I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished so far, I’m not doing anything extraordinary. I’m physically healthy, so -- within reason -- I could be doing a lot of things right now that I’m not currently doing. At this point, I know I don't feel like I do enough -- not nearly as much as I'm capable of doing, at least. I’m not saying this because I want people to prove me wrong by listing all the things I currently do that maybe other people don't do. That’s just the way I feel.

Those Olympic athletes? They’re hardcore. They set their sights on something and don’t give up. Even though I'm okay with never reaching the same mental level, they have a lot to teach us about the power of determination.

Related Reading:

Melissa has been looking at profiles of female Olympians in magazines and finds them inspiring.

Spin Diva loves watching the Olympics, and shares a link to a website that shows athletes preparing for the big event.

Maria Kang talks about how to get back on track when you’ve strayed from your regular training plan.

Women's Health: Get in Olympic Shape (the Q&A pages are really interesting)

BeliefNet: Top 15 Most Inspirational Olympic Moments

(Contributing editor Zandria had dinner with six fellow bloggers on Saturday. She blogs at Zandria.us.)

Accountability is what gets you out of bed at 5am for a morning run when you know your friend is waiting for you. It causes you to do things like fill out exercise and nutrition logs, so you can go back and look at your progress and make sure you’re staying on track with your goals.

People are much more likely to stick with something if they hold themselves accountable in some way. For some it can be as simple as making a decision and telling a friend they're serious about sticking to it -- but could that friend please check in once in a while, just to make sure they're staying on track? Other people need something more structured. Me? I can go both ways, depending on the goal. With certain things, I have no problem sticking to my plan -- but with other things I do much better if I have backup.

A good example of something I need to hold myself accountable to is my 101 Things list. (Maybe because it's a long-term goal, and not something I work on every day or a certain amount of time per week?) I hold myself accountable to completing the things on my list by posting monthly updates, no matter what.

When a goal is more short-term and I'm not holding myself accountable, I tend to get into trouble. I announced last month that I'd like to be able to do at least 10 standard push-ups by Labor Day. I can do 5 of them at this point, but I only have a month to go -- and last month I could already do 3-4. That's not a lot of progress. But I’m sure a big part of it is due to the fact that I haven’t been following any kind of specific plan.

Here are 6 ways to hold yourself accountable:

1. Use a website like SparkPeople or Traineo to track your exercise and food intake.

Advantages: It’s convenient and easy to use. It’s also helpful to see changes made over time.

Disadvantage: Having to remember what exercises you did (or what you ate) once you get back to a computer -- either that or you have to write it down and then transfer it to the computer later, so you may be duplicating your efforts.

Other electronic options: track your activity using Twitter; commit to posting regular before-and-after photos on your blog; start a new blog that’s specifically set up to track your activity and progress.

Ali at The Office Diet describes the benefits of keeping a food/exercise diary.

2. Use a paper journal (like one of these free downloads from FitSugar)

Advantage: You don’t have to go online if you don’t want to.

Disadvantage: There could potentially be a lot of paper to keep track of.

Maria Kang gives 6 Tips to Start Running in the Morning, one of which is to “Keep a running calendar on your wall.” Maria says she’s “a very visual person who constantly needs to see reinforcement of what I am doing. I hate to see blank spots so it motivates me to have none!”

3. Hire a personal trainer
Knowing that someone is going to meet you at a particular time, kick your butt, and you’re paying them to do it? Sounds like a great way to hold yourself accountable!

Legally Heidi wants to hire a personal trainer to get her back on track.

4. Sign up for a class
How about trying boot camp for 6 weeks, or an 8-week dancing class? A recommendation -- if you're just starting out, try a class that lasts a certain period of time rather than something that goes on indefinitely. If you don’t care for it after the time is up, you can always try something new.

5. Work out with a friend or partner
I don’t currently work out with a friend, but there are certain situations where it’s nice to have company. I had a great time with my sister when I took her to my gym last month when she came for a visit. It would also be fun to have company when I go out to ride my bike.

That’s Fit: Working Out as a Couple

Isaac at Got Strength?: The Pros and Cons of Group Exercise

6. Establish your own "fitness rules"
I hadn't thought of it this way before I read Jacki's post at That’s Fit about her five fitness rules, but I tend to adhere to this more than anything else right now. I don’t want to carry paper around with me; it can be annoying to me to track my activity online; I don't have a personal trainer; I don't work out with a friend.

The “fitness rules” that I follow are making sure I work out with weights three days a week (unless I'm out of town). I don't stay on a strict schedule for the other stuff, but it's pretty much guaranteed that I'll find time for walking, running, and biking throughout a typical week.

What helps you stay on track?

(Contributing Editor Zandria also blogs at Zandria.us and just posted her BlogHer ’08 conference recap!)

The reason I didn’t feel like a grown-up didn’t have anything to do with feeling -- or acting -- irresponsible. I’ve been taking care of myself ever since I graduated from a rural Virginia high school a few days after I turned 17, and the following month I moved 60 miles away from my family, to Richmond, with a friend. I went to college for a year, then I took a break from school for a few years while I worked. I stayed at the same company for seven years, between the ages of 18-25. During that time I made the decision to go back to school, and while I was there I studied abroad in Amsterdam for a semester. I bought a brand new Civic when I was 19 years old, and I used it to take several cross-country trips across the U.S. by myself.

But while those things were happening, there were other factors holding me back from feeling like an adult. I always lived with other people, for instance, so I never felt like I was handling things completely on my own. I lived with my older sister for a number of years, and then my younger sister was my roommate for a while. When I moved to California for a year after graduating from college, I lived with my aunt and uncle. There was always someone to fall back on if I needed it.

I was also struggling with my raging quarterlife crisis -- I always thought I should be doing something different from whatever I happened to be doing at the time. I didn’t date anyone at all for a number of years, and even though that was my choice, I felt separate from other people my age who had boyfriends, and that whole “I’m sharing my life with someone else” experience.

In addition to all that, I had an eating disorder. I’ve heard this theory that says one of the reasons certain females develop eating disorders is because they’re scared of growing up. If you weigh less, you don’t have womanly curves. Your breasts shrink; your body is more childlike because you’re straight up-and-down and not filled out in all the places where women tend to be filled out. If you lose enough weight, you’re likely to stop menstruating (over the course of a few years when I was underweight, I had my period maybe…three times?). While I wasn’t scared of growing up (it was more a feeling of powerlessness about my future and what it held), I can see how not feeling like an adult could have played a role in my body issues.

Being an adult, or feeling like one, doesn’t lend itself to neat age categories. You can’t hit 21, or 25, or 30, and automatically put a checkmark in the “adult” box. It’s based on your life experiences; your mindset; all kinds of factors. If someone gets married at age 22 and has children while they’re young, they might feel more adult than someone ten years their senior who made different choices in life.

I started thinking about all this when I read a post here on BlogHer not long ago. It was written by myrnatheminx, a single woman who is almost 40, called BlogHers of A Certain Age Who Aren't "Mommies". But what stood out to me was a comment that QuirkyEconomist left on that post. She’s a 30-something single woman who said she often finds it hard to relate to fellow single ladies who are still in their 20s.

I think many of the blogs that talk about being happily single are written by 20-somethings, so while I often find individual posts I love, there are many that reflect that younger stage of life and are less relevant to me now. Maybe all the single not-quite-middle-aged women bloggers are writing about things like politics or social activism, rather than life as a single, not-quite-middle-aged woman?

I started thinking about all this -- feeling like an adult versus not feeling that way -- after I read that comment. I’m not saying that older women see all females in their 20s as non-adults, but I do think it’s harder for them to relate. And that makes sense. Women in their 20s tend to struggle more with questions about their life and where they’re going than women who are in their 30s and above. Age differences will always be a factor, even if you have other interests in common. I can already see examples of this myself at age 28. Even though it doesn’t mean I don’t understand them and what they’re going through, it’s easier for me to relate to bloggers who are closer to my age than those just recently out of high school.

But the nice thing is, regardless of age, we’re always going to be able to relate to people who have similar interests. For instance, my blogroll expanded once I became interested in reading fitness-related blogs last year -- I add new ones all the time simply because we share an interest in that topic and I like reading what these people have to say.

I’ll be at the BlogHer conference next week. I’m looking forward to seeing people whose ages span a wide range -- there’s 19-year-old Sagan and 56-year-old Deb, and I feel a commonality with both of them because of our interest in health and fitness. Next week it won’t matter whether Sagan considers herself to be an adult, and it won’t matter that Deb is a few years older than my mother.

When did you start feeling like an adult? And if you still don't, what do you think has to happen in your life first before you do?

Related Reading:

Christine Hassler at the Huffington Post describes the term Adultolescence, and how it relates to women just as much as men.

20-year-old Dar looks at her mother, who got married at age 21, and realizes how young that really is. She asks, "I wonder if as you get older the 'kid' feeling goes away and you feel like an adult?"

Even as a mom with two kids, mamastoff sometimes feels like she's not quite an adult. She says, "When I was younger I always thought there would be some magical age that I would begin to feel like an adult. I’m beginning to think that age doesn’t exist!"

(Contributing editor Zandria blogs at Keep Up With Me, and will be facilitating the 20-Something Bloggers meet-up next Friday morning at the BlogHer conference.)

What is krav maga? It borrows certain techniques from martial arts, but it’s not technically a martial art. It was originally developed in Israel as a self defense and military hand-to-hand combat system. (Is that too obscure? Watch this video on YouTube.)

After talking to my co-worker and hearing her enthusiasm, I decided to take an introductory class. The first thing we did was warm-up -- but don’t let that modest term fool you. The warm-up kicked my butt, but in a good way. I was literally dripping sweat all over the mat (along with everyone else, I might add). We started out by jogging forward, and then backward, around the room. We did push-ups, and burpees (which I’d seen but never attempted), and squats. (And let me tell you, I was rockin’ those squats. Most of the time I do squats with weights, so doing them with just my body weight was easy. When I get on one of those squat machines at the gym, I'm using weight-plates that add up to 140 pounds -- roughly my own body weight.)

I did have an embarrassing moment. I’m not used to jogging backward, so I was having a little trouble keeping up. I felt like I was going to fall, and it was awkward trying to run while holding my head at an angle so I could see behind me. The guy who was running in front of me wasn’t paying attention, and he ran right into me as we rounded a corner of the room -- his back collided with my chest, and his foot landed directly on top of one of mine, causing both of us to land in a heap on the mat. Luckily we were able to recover quickly and jump back up, rejoining the line of backwards runners.

After the warm-up we went over the correct way to stand in a fighting position, and practiced different punches and kicks. We worked in groups of two -- I was partnered with another female -- and we took turns holding hard, black punching bags while the other person beat the crap out of them.

We’d call out to our partner which punch they should throw (“jab” for a right-hand punch; “cross” for the left, and “combo” for one of each). While we were punching we were also moving around, and we had to shuffle our feet to stay in a fighting stance. Sometimes it was hard to remember to do everything at once: stand in the correct pose (or the instructor would come by and correct you), punch with the correct fist, don’t forget to twist your body with each punch (and make sure you’re holding your fist in such a way that you won’t injure yourself!). But it was fun and the time went by quickly.

We also practiced kicking. One person would bend forward and hold the punching bag a little lower than waist-height. The other person would kick straight up, with their shin hitting the bag on the way up. I was good at kicking. My lower body is pretty strong.

(This is completely unrelated, but just in case anyone's curious...yes, about 3/4 of the class consisted of males. I didn’t feel self-conscious -- I’ve gotten used to being around men when I lift weights at the gym -- but it was nice having all that eye candy whenever we stopped to rest.)

I didn’t have bruises on my arms once the class was over, but I did bust up a few of my knuckles from hitting the punching bag so hard with my bare fists. (The regular students came prepared with gloves or hand wraps.)

My worst injury was a knuckle on my right hand. The skin was completely torn away -- even though it looks a lot better now, it’s taking a while to heal (bending my fingers so much doesn’t help the healing process). I had two scraped knuckles on my left hand as well, but they didn’t look quite as bad as this one:

Am I going to continue with these classes? Not right now. It was fun, and a great workout, and I’m glad I tried it, but I'm not ready to commit to the time and money involved. If it was something I could do once a week, or pay on a per-class basis, that might be a different story. But this studio in Washington, DC (just a few blocks from where I work) charges $150 per month for unlimited classes. If I signed up and only went once a week, I’d be paying almost $40 per class. Right now I have too many after-work commitments -- including the extra work I do in addition to my regular “9-to-5” -- to take classes multiple times a week.

Now, true, I realize that fitness, and how much we’re willing to pay for it, is all about our priorities. If I truly loved krav maga, I’m sure I’d be happy to hand over that $150 every month. I’d either cut back on some of the extra work I’m doing, or I’d cut back on social activities and the other forms of exercise I do, like running and biking. But that’s not what I want to do.

I don’t feel like I’m doing so much right now that I’m overwhelmed, but at this point I’d rather continue to try new things (like going rock climbing -- that’s next on my list!), until I find something I love so much that I feel like I’m ready to focus a lot of time and energy on just one activity.

But, you know, maybe I’ll never focus on just one thing -- and I’m perfectly fine with that. I’m a Gemini, and Geminis are characterized by their love of change. If I take krav maga, and then go rock climbing, and then take a cardio striptease class, and then yoga, and ballet, and boxing? Oh, my Lord, how fun does that sound? I’ve never been an expert in any one subject, and that used to bother me quite a bit -- but it bothers me less and less each day. The fact is, I like trying new things, and I like being able to say, “Yes, I’ve tried that. Now let me tell you what I thought about it from my non-expert perspective.”

Sacha Chua started taking krav maga in early 2007, and started back up again a few months ago. She’s experienced bruises on her arms and knuckles, but she seems to be enjoying herself. In April, Sacha made this observation about her hands:

The middle knuckle of my right hand is a little darker than the others, and a bit sensitive to the touch. It’s an interesting sensation. I’ve never bruised my knuckles before. Heck, the krav maga folks had to teach me how to punch.

But it’s so much fun!

And in June:

In...krav maga class, we practiced groundwork, side kicks, back kicks, and getting out of side head-locks. I’ve got a long way to go before I can kick as well as the others do, but the guys make it fun. We often warm up with a shoulder-tapping game, which I like. I sometimes forget to breathe, though, and that makes me tire faster! Gotta work on that.

Lil Leya said she couldn't wait to go back after her first krav maga class.

Yesterday's combat instructions were geared to teach you to get out of a situation where someone has you in a bear hug. The instructor gave us techniques like slapping your hand on the back of the attacker's neck where their nerve ending are, or grabbing their nose and twisting their face until they have to drop. My favorite is gouging our fingers into the attacker's eyes and pushing them onto the floor! At one point we were practicing (on each other's foreheads, not our eyes...I just got laser surgery thank you very much!!!)...anyway..we were practicing and the instructor praised my eye gouging technique! They have officially created a monster! I can't wait to go back!!!

Attackers...watch out!!! I may be little, but I am fierce!!!!!

Kimber is taking krav maga with a friend.

We are finishing our second week of Krav Maga and love every pulse rising, sweat inducing, limb extending moment of it. We often partner up for drills and being the shy introverted types, we spent the first week glued to each other partly in fear of the unknown and partly out of our survival instinct. We have now reached a more comfortable level of acceptance among the group and are forging new partnerships with our classmates.

Has anyone else tried krav maga? If so, what did you think of it? If you haven't, would you?

(Contributing editor Zandria also blogs at Keep Up With Me.)

Depending on where you are mentally, or your age, or any number of factors, the results will vary wildly. I’ve been doing this internal question-and-answer session for years, and I know it was an important step in making it through my quarterlife crisis. I would ask myself if I was happy with this or that aspect of my life, and when the answer was “no,” I would go about trying to change it. Because I was perpetually discontent, in the space of a few years I studied abroad in the Netherlands for five months, spent a year in California, and finally ended up outside of Washington, DC.

Even though I’m much more content now than I used to be, doing a periodic check-in helps me stay on track -- and I like to think it helps me identify small issues before they become big problems. Sometimes I know I’m due for a mental check-in just because it’s a certain time of year and there’s a decision to be made. (Like whether or not to renew an apartment lease. That’s always a big one.) Other times it’s when something unexpected comes up, like being offered a promotion. If you say yes, you’re basically making an informal commitment that you’ll stay with this employer for a certain length of time -- when maybe, before the job offer happened, you were thinking of looking elsewhere.

That promotion was an option for me a few months back. I took a weekend to think about it because I needed to make sure it was the right decision. As the people I consulted for their opinions can attest, I didn’t let the fact that I’d be making more money be my sole motivating factor. It’s always been important to me first and foremost that I’m relatively content where I am. I needed to ask myself not only if I was happy with my co-workers and the job I’d be doing, but if I was happy living where I am in general. I could take the promotion and continue working in DC. I could decide to finish out my housing lease and move back to Richmond -- a city I lived in for eight years and where most of my immediate family currently resides. Or I could always go to Korea or Russia and teach English (the option is always there, right?).

The fact is, as a single woman I know I have the option of changing my living situation more readily than someone who’s in a relationship. There’s nobody to consult but myself; as long as I take care of my obligations I can pretty much go wherever I want. I’m not saying I’d remain single just because I want to keep that freedom, but it’s definitely one of the perks. (I did do that in the past, though -- not knowing where I wanted to live or what I wanted to do was the biggest reason I stayed single in my early-to-mid 20s.)

For this particular job decision, I weighed the pros and cons and decided to take the promotion. It’s the right thing for me for right now.

This is the general checklist I use when it’s time for a mental life evaluation:

My physical location...is it working for me? I like living in Old Town Alexandria. It’s pricey, but as a renter I can afford it. There’s a lot of stuff to do around here, and I rarely have to use my car because of the access to public transportation.

My job...is it where I need to be? I don’t think I’ll work as an Executive Assistant for the rest of my life, but it’s okay for right now. I like knowing that the nonprofit organization I work for is making a difference; I have some really fantastic co-workers; the benefits are great (Free health and dental insurance! Three weeks of paid vacation per year! Whooooo!); I can pay my bills and have money left over.

Am I challenging myself in some way? It’s important for me to try new things, even if I try it and realize I don’t enjoy it (like belly dancing). I’ve been known to take a single class just to see what something is all about. Also, working through my 101 Things list has inspired me to try things I wouldn’t have taken the time to do if I hadn’t written them down.

How are my relationships? I keep in touch with some friends better than others, but usually that has more to do with physical proximity than anything else.

I have other questions I ask myself, but those are the major ones. Everyone’s checklist is going to be different. If I was in a relationship, I’d need to ask myself if there’s anything I should change or do differently. If I had a child, I’d need to look at how I was handling my parenting duties.

What would your mental life-evaluation look like? Is it time for a check-in of your own? What aspect of your life needs changing?

Related Reading:

Semi-Charmed Jen (I recently met her in person) writes a lot about personal empowerment and discovering what it is we want to do with our lives. In this post, Jen talks about the importance of having dreams.

Cynthia is trying to make changes in her life, too. I really admire Cynthia because she’s not making changes to solely benefit herself -- she just got accepted to work as a head coach for Girls on the Run, so she’s doing something good for others at the same time.

Becca quit her job in the Los Angeles entertainment industry to work as a CrossFit instructor. I think it’s awesome when people make a job switch because they’re so passionate about what they do.

(Contributing editor Zandria also blogs at Keep Up With Me.)

I went to a firing range last year for the first time. I haven’t been back since then, but I did enjoy it. I discovered (to my surprise) that I’m a pretty good shot. It took me a few times firing a small handgun to get used to the idea that such a small instrument could create such a loud noise -- not to mention the surge of power you feel in your hands and arms once you pull the trigger.

Would I own a gun? I’ve never specifically sought one out. In my case, learning how to handle it properly, and clean it, would need to be thoroughly explained before I’d be comfortable calling myself a gun owner (not to mention additional firing practice). So I’m definitely not opposed to owning a gun; it’s just that I wouldn’t waltz into a store and buy one without knowing what I was doing (or at least having some sort of plan).

So let’s say I sign up to take a firearms safety class. I choose a handgun that I’m comfortable with, and the mechanics of how to use and care for this weapon are drilled into my head. The next question is, do I actually need to own a gun? And that, of course, is the hardest question to answer.

I don’t see myself carrying a gun in my purse, or in my car, on a regular basis. I don’t feel like I need that level of personal security. I could see myself keeping a gun under my bed, in case someone were to break in – but how often does that happen?

Maybe that’s the problem, though. Maybe I have a false sense of security, and unless something bad happens I’ll continue to think I can go along as I am right now. After all, I don’t live in a bad area. I’ve never lived anywhere that’s been broken into while I was living there. I’ve never been physically attacked. Aside from one incident a few months ago when I had a guy follow me in his car while I was on foot (someone who was more annoying than menacing, and drove off once I finally raised my voice to him), I’ve never been in a situation where I felt like I was in immediate danger.

Some women take self-defense classes. The fact that I have a self-admitted short memory -- which means if I don’t practice something on a regular basis, I’ll almost certainly forget it -- is a big reason why I haven’t bothered to do the same. If I were to be attacked six months after the class ended, I can see myself thinking, “Was I supposed to grab with this hand, and then elbow him on this side, to escape from a choke-hold?” More than likely -- as I look back on situations that I was prepared for in advance, but rational thought escaped me at the worst possible moment (like job interviews) -- I fear everything I’d learned in a self-defense class would fly right out of my head as soon as someone got close enough to grab me.

I don’t know what the odds are of someone my age, late 20s, being attacked by a stranger. When I first moved to Alexandria and lived in a not-as-nice area of the city, I regularly carried pepper spray with me in my purse. At the time I was working a job where I didn’t get home until after midnight, and every night when I got out of the car I had my purse over one arm and the container of pepper spray in my right hand. I never had to use it, but I felt better knowing it was there.

But now? I work regular daytime hours, and I live in a better area, and sometimes I’ll even go running outside after the sun has set. Would I feel differently about my low level of personal protection if something happened to me, or if there was a known attacker on the loose in my area? Would I alter some of my habits, like running in the dark? Yes, I’m sure I’d feel differently in that case.

Options: The aforementioned self-defense class. Pepper spray. Tasers. My problem with all three of these things is that you have to be pretty close to the person in order to use them. I suspect that's the appeal of guns for some women -- you run a much smaller risk of being overpowered. It’s much easier to keep someone away from you in the first place, rather than having to react once someone already has their hands on you.

Then again, I’ve already said I wouldn’t carry a gun around with me on a regular basis, so if I were serious about protecting myself I’d probably have multiple options to choose from.

Sigh. There’s so much to think about. It’s so much easier to pretend this will never be an issue, and I can just continue living my life as I have been. But if I think about it, it does bother me that I’m not prepared. I think I should be prepared to react in some way to an emergency situation. And right now, I’m not.

Cindy at Ethiodyssey was initially attracted to the idea of owning a gun, but changed her mind.

In 1997, I took a basic NRA gun class in Pennsylvania with one of my co-workers. My motivation for doing so was that at the time I thought if I ever lived alone as a single woman, I might need a small handgun for my dwelling to protect myself. The second night of that course I shot a 9 mm handgun and it almost knocked me completely down, it was so powerful. From that moment I've never again considered personally owning a handgun nor had any interest in anything even remotely to do with the NRA. I understand why the NRA exists. However I'm appalled at the prevalence of guns in our country today. When the writers of the U.S. Constitution put the 2nd Amendment in that document that has shaped American legal and social history, obviously the public paradigms and social landscape were profoundly different.

Skye Puppy talks about Taser parties.

I really would have loved [a Taser] when I was first divorced. I had been accustomed to having a man around the house for 18 years, whose job was to get up and investigate any scary noises in the middle of the night, while I got to stay under the covers listening for any telltale sounds of a scuffle. I'm not sure what I would have done if I'd heard them.

Suddenly on my own, though, having to deal with ominous sounds in the night myself, a nice pink Taser would have felt comforting. Or maybe the purple or leopard-print model.

Erin Weed (professional speaker, author and Executive Director of Girls Fight Back!) asks some of the same questions I have about the Taser. She explains what a Taser is and what it does, and she also lists a few things women should consider when it comes to their personal safety -- she’s a fan of being prepared to fight back physically. For instance:

#2: Is [the Taser] a replacement for other self-defense? I get a little nervous when anyone’s self-defense response is a can of pepper spray, a taser or any other product du jour. You’ve got to have a plan if the batteries die or if you miss. What then? I think your mind and body are your best weapons, and anything else you decide to use is a bonus.

#3: Are you going to carry your taser all the time? A mistake we often make is to arm ourselves only when there is a perceived threat. […]

#4: Will you get training? Sometimes women buy safety products, only to FEEL more safe. This is more dangerous than not carrying anything at all, because it creates a false sense of security. Anything we arm ourselves in, we should also know how to use under stress.

Erin also has a hypothesis why women “avoid learning about self-defense and personal safety.”

I’ve been asking women from all walks of life to understand what’s holding us back. I mean, why wouldn’t any of us want to know how to save our own life? And recently it has become somewhat clear. Perhaps more women are interested in seeking peace than fighting back. Why go to a self-defense class and get verbally assaulted and pinned by a mock assailant when you can take a yoga class instead? Why choose to put ourselves in staged (yet scary) situations that all of us dread and go to great lengths to avoid? I mean, after a day of work and kids and bills and life…doesn’t a glass of wine sound a tad more soothing than fighting off a padded attacker with a palm strike?

Phoenix and Salamander took a self-defense class where she was attacked at the end by an instructor wearing a padded suit. The attack was frightening for her, but at the end she felt empowered.

I actually only remember the three minute struggle in bits and pieces. Throwing hands off only to have them grab me again and again. Using every part of my body to resist. […] Yelling and cursing, saying things that I am astonished to admit I was actually feeling. Ending up on the floor and driving my feet over and over into his solar plexus as I tried desperately to get up, terrified then.

Then the first solidly landed cross came. I have a muscle memory of drawing my fist back and letting it sail right out and over John’s chin, and watching his head follow the path of my force. I thought, holy crap, I just did that. […]

I hope that the majority of marks I will leave in this world will be positive, generative ones. But now I am aware of my capability to fight, and that I am proud that I can. And I hope that will be another part of me I can be proud of.

What do you think about your ability to protect yourself? Are you prepared?

(Contributing editor Zandria just bought a bicycle, which she loves. You can find her blogging regularly at Keep Up With Me.)

A huge smile appeared on her face and she walked over to stand next to me. She told me she’d always had muscular arms, but up until recently they were just thick -- she’d been putting some extra work into their appearance and she was proud of them. “As you should be,” I said. “You look great.” She must have thanked me two or three times.

I had a smile on my face when I left the restroom, too. It wasn’t just because I felt good about giving this woman a well-received compliment. It was because I knew how she felt. I know how awesome it is to receive a compliment when someone notices a positive change in your appearance; something you’ve worked so hard to achieve. I had a similar experience late last year, after I’d been working out regularly with weights for about six months. I had met up with a friend who I hadn’t seen since the previous summer, and her reaction (“You look great!”) made me feel like a superstar.

Sure, we work out for ourselves. But when people actually notice...and tell you so? We are human creatures and we tend to enjoy a good compliment. In addition to doing exercises for our arms (and chest, and shoulders) so we can easily lift heavy boxes, we also do it so our upper bodies will look good in a tank top. We do squats, leg presses, and lunges (among other things) to form shapely legs. And why else would we suffer through core exercises unless we cared about flattening our midsection?

Some people really love working out with weights. Some people hate it. Sometimes people think they hate it until they get someone (like a friend, or a personal trainer, or even a staff person at a gym) to show them how things are done. As for me, up until this time last June I’d simply never worked with weights at all (unless you count a few sporadic, half-hearted attempts at bicep curls with a 5-lb dumbbell).

Working out with weights has done more to transform my body than anything else I’ve ever done. I do cardio as well, but unless you’re specifically trying to lose a lot of weight by burning extra calories, you’re just not going to see the same kind of physical transformation that you will with regular weight training. I like being able to feel the muscles in my legs. I like being able to squeeze my arms and not have them go squish-squish -- there’s actual muscle there now, which I’ve never had before.

But in addition to the benefits on the outside, I’m absolutely certain that becoming physically stronger has made me mentally stronger as well. I feel more confident. It doesn’t bother me to be the only women in a weight room filled with grunting men. If someone tries to help me carry something heavy, I feel awesome when I'm able to say, “No, thank you. I’ve got it.”

Noel Figart agrees that we should do weight training to help us feel better on the inside, and to feel physically stronger -- not just because you’ll notice a positive difference in how you look on the outside.

When I see articles about how someone’s life has become so much better since they got thin and look great in a bikini I want to scream, “You’re missing the point!” I mean...of course I want to be found attractive. But ya know, that’s a lot of work to go to get approbation from the outside. And the idea of finding life validation in terms of how sexy I’m seen is kinda scary to me, because it puts my life worth in someone else’s hands. No thanks. See, when I work out, I do it to be stronger. Would I like to look hot in a bikini? Sure. But honestly that’s years away if it ever happens and isn’t much of a motivator to get my ass into the pool or a bar loaded across my shoulders. At this stage it’s the energy to do my day. It’s having physical options.

Kelly from Fitness Fixation says there are four types of commentary she generally gets about her (muscled, tattooed) arms -- some is positive, some not so much.

[M]ost of the people who disapprove of the guns are coincidentally not people I have even one tiny bit of interest in impressing. I mean, it’s uncanny how often it coincides. [...]

At the end of the day, I’m just glad I found the sporty life and it makes me happy. And I don’t care about the haters.

One of my all-time favorite quotes came from MizFit when she was interviewed by Workout Mommy.

When I was a personal trainer I would *always* try and talk my clients out of wanting to be skinny. “You want to be BIG” I’d admonished them. “Muscular. You want to take up SPACE in the world. Be noticed.” To me skinny is weak and I’m not about the weak woman.

Erin from Lose the Buddha lost a fair amount of weight, but it's weight training that she attributes to her increased feelings of self-confidence.

At some point I'm going to have to stop saying that I hate weight lifting because it's the majority of what I'm doing in the gym and I, well, I love it. Lifting weights, and seeing how it's transforming my body, is giving me an appreciation for what my body can do in a way that losing all that weight didn't do. [...]

Lifting weights has shown me something new to try and love about my body, as opposed to hating or feeling self-conscious or apologetic for not taking up as much room anymore.

I feel strong. I am strong.

Weight training: love it or hate it? If you've been working with weights on a regular basis, have you noticed a positive difference (either internally or externally)?

Related Reading:

BlogHer Contributing Editor Deb wrote a great post about how she got started at the gym -- and gained confidence in the process.

Taylor Ryan gives us 10 Reasons Every Woman Should Lift Weight, as well as tips for Weight Lifting for Beginners.

SparkPeople: Why strength training is a must for everyone

Fit Sugar: Five Reasons You Should Be Lifting Weights

(Contributing editor Zandria also blogs at Keep Up With Me.)