Rachelle Mee-Chapman's blog

8 Creative Approaches to Grief

2009-10-25T16:36:42-05:00

As Dias de los Muertos approaches, or All Soul’s Day, I'm delighted to have blogger Kara Jones from Mother Henna with us to talk to us about creative ways to address and honor our grief.

Halloween and Samhain are just the beginning of a long series of holidays stretching through to the New Year. For those of us who have experienced a loss, recent or otherwise, the holidays can be a difficult time. That’s why those rare but important ceremonies memorializing our loved ones, or helping us acknowledge the holidays in way that truly reflect our genuine emotional state, are such a treasure.

From colorful celebrations like Dia de los Muertos to more solemn ceremonies like a Blue Christmas mass, Kara has gathered an impressive list of resources to help you or someone you love navigate the difficult waters of the holiday season.

In my work as a pastor, and later as a soulcare specialist, I found that those who are experiencing grief are severely underserved. So please, pass this resource around. The world needs people like Kara who know Good Griefgood grief.

8 Creative Approaches to Grief:
creating new traditions for the holidaze
with Kara LC Jones

When talking with people about grief & creativity, I often hear things like, “I’m just not very creative” or “I’m not really an artist.” The thing about learning to live life after loss is that creativity becomes an every day practice, not just an artistic endeavor. It’s not always about writing poetry or drawing or painting. When someone is overwhelmed by grief and goes to the ocean to throw rocks as a way to express anger, they are being creative. When someone chooses to pay for the coffee of the person behind them, leaving a Kindness Card for the person, they are being creative.

So at this time of year, when the holidays might end up seeming like a holidaze for bereaved people, I thought it might be helpful to offer 8 seasonal ideas for practicing your creative approach to living life after loss.

1) Remembrance Day and Month
The month of October and particularly October 15th are Pregnancy Loss, Infant & Child Death Awareness times. Just know that if the death of a child is what has you in a holidaze, you are not alone. Take a moment each day to light a candle. Spend a few silent moments honoring your love for that child. Grief cannot take away your love.

2) Day of the Dead. The month of October is also preparation and lead up to Days of the Dead. October 31st is sometimes thought of as the day of the innocents, honoring the children who have died first. Then November 1 and 2 are honoring anyone who has died, who you wish to honor. There is a long history and cultural context to these traditions, and rituals often vary depending on the particular community in which you celebrate. But most all include making, decorating, and displaying of sugar skulls. We host a day every October for people to come to our home, make & decorate sugar skulls, and then place them on our community ofrenda or take home for their personal altars. We pass the bucket on these days, too, and any proceeds raised go to the local Food Bank in honor of all those we are remembering.

3) Giving Thanks. While many of would say we feel no thanks at all for the grief that has visited upon us, we can choose at some point to begin paying Kindnesses forward in the name of the person who died, in honor of the love we still feel for them. One wonderful way to “allow your loved one to touch the world” is through the Kindness Project over at the MISS Foundation. You basically do a kindness for someone and leave a card for them that says, “This random act of kindness was done in memory and honor of (fill in the name here.” We’ve heard of amazing and creative stories thru this project over the years.

4) Children’s Memorial Day. The second Sunday of each December is honored as Children’s Memorial Day. Though this started as a grassroots awareness movement by one family, it has been embraced by international organizations like Compassionate Friends, MISS, MADD, BPUSA, and more. When you are lighting your candles for winter holidays, add a candle for remembering those you love, for what you feel you’ve lost, for honoring the love you have that cannot be touched by death or loss. If you want to connect with others at this time, many of the participating organizations have Memorial Day services, or you can organize your own candle lighting. For full information click here.

5) Blue Christmas. There has been a quiet movement afoot in the last few years in faith based services. We’re starting to see “Blue Christmas” masses and “Blue Holiday” rituals being offered. Though I haven’t yet seen one central website or organization offering a comprehensive listing of these services, you can do a Google search for “Blue Christmas Service” and you’ll find lots of articles and listings. The thing I find so interesting about this movement is that it is basically a faith based support for people whose faith is flagging at the moment. Rather than giving out platitudes or telling people how they “woulda, coulda, shoulda” feel, these events allow for people to feel what they feel when they feel it and have a place for expression and connection during the holiday season. That’s a big leap up from the “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” era!

6) Alternative Gift Giving. Another part of the holiday season is gift giving. When we feel down, especially if we are missing someone who is physically gone, this can be a hard ritual to face. There are several alternatives you might try. Go ahead and buy for the person. In our house, we think about how old our son would be now; what we would want for him; what he would want as gifts. We shop, we wrap, we celebrate. And we find a family with a child the same age that needs a little help in the gift giving department and we donate the gifts forward. Sometimes we do this through the local food bank, but the Salvation Army also hosts an Angel Tree program for this each year. Though I do sometimes keep one of the items to add to my son’s memory shelf in our home.

Another thing we’ve done is to have trees planted through Give-A-Tree program , or donate a flock of chicks through The Heifer Project. Then we send note or cards to others saying, “Such and such has been done in your honor and in memory of our son.” It is a way of getting off the endless cycle of material stuff! Not to mention, you are giving something back to the world while still honoring the tradition of gift giving and acknowledging your loved ones who have died.

7) Time Off, Time Out. The holiday season can be bustling, but it can also be a time when things slow down. Business slows, people take time off, kids are on holiday. Be your own best advocate and make time off, time out for you and yours. We all seem to keep busy schedules these days, blocking off time for various activities of each family member. Well schedule time off, time out with equal weight and importance compared to any other activity. Seriously. Make an appointment for yourself to “Do Nothing.” Allow yourself some silence. Some reflection time. Some time to breathe and feel your body and being. Imagine setting aside the heavy feelings and grief. Put them on the shelf outside the room – you can pick them up later. And for now just sit and breathe. Let your mind and heart touch on appreciation. Chant for a few minutes, “I approve of myself.” You don’t have to believe it, you might feel funny saying it, but try it out. See how it feels to cheer for yourself, to be your own advocate, to be with yourself in love instead of criticism or hurriedness or mindlessness. Give yourself the gift of an appointment with nothing!

8) A Self-Care New Year. As we move into the New Year, there is always lots of talk about resolutions and changes people want to make and keep. But for this coming year, why not consider an alternative to the typical resolutions. What about making a decision to be present to exactly who you are in this moment? Instead of being in a constant state of needing to fix, get better, improve, why not be with the you that you are right now. Tend to the you of this very moment. Take a few moments in each day to be with yourself in a quiet space. Listen to your breathing, hear what your body, mind, and spirit are calling. Honor those callings.

If your BEing really wants to do something around this practice, then get in the habit of making notes just after your quiet time. Note what you hear, callings or visions that rose to the surface. Use those notes to inspire you later. Maybe they are the basis of some writings you want to do. Maybe they are the sparks of a drawing or painting or collage you want to make. Maybe they are the inklings of a new path of learning you’d like to explore. Let them guide you as you learn to tend to yourself and your heART.

Whatever you decide to do (or not do), be (or not be) this holiday season, know that the holidaze can simply be a calling to explore your every day experience more creatively. It is okay to add new traditions to old ones or to drop old ones entirely. Each day you have the response-ability to create meaning in all that you do. You are your own best advocate for finding your way through the holidaze. And you are not alone. Many of us out here are creatively exploring. Connect as you need and want! Make the holidays your own.

Kara LC Jones is a Grief & Creativity Coach and the heARTist behind the offerings at Mother Henna. If you found these ideas inspiring, there are other ideas for coping with the holidaze KotaPress, And on the KOTA: Knowing Ourselves Thru Art blog. We’ve also got Creative Prompts year round at both the Mother Henna blog and KOTA blog.

Rachelle Mee-Chapman is a soulcare specialist, writer, and mother(ish) to several. Rooted in Seattle, she is currently living the expat life in Copenhagen, Denmark. You can find her at Magpie Girl, follow her on Twitter and friend her at Facebook. This is Rachelle’s last week as a Contributing Editor at BlogHer. It’s been a lovely ride. Thank you for being here!

Artful Artists are Good for the Soul

2009-10-18T14:57:42-05:00

For years now I’ve worked a non-traditional minister and my speciality is spirituality and the arts. But my best lesson came not from my seminary training, nor from the numerous hours I’ve spent studying spiritual direction. The best lesson I ever learned about art and spirituality came from one of my ministerial partners, Israel Button, who told me: “People intuit truth through art. You have to use art to preach.”

Over the years I’ve found that statement to be endlessly true, and the more I work with artists the more I am captured by the deep intersection between creativity and spirituality. So today at BlogHer I’d like to features a few artists I adore.

Rowena Murillo of Warrior Girl draws hauntingly evocative images. Her Flying Girl print series is a particular favorite of mine and features strong feminine images of adventure and bravery. Flying Girl embodies that mysterious state of being I like to describe as “standing in your own power.” Flying Girl is a Warrior, or The Miracle is Now is one of my special favorites. (I will certainly be thinking of her when I visit Joan of Arc’s memorials in Rouen next week!) Here’s Rowena’s poetic description of her flying warrior:

'”Like Joan of Arc, Flying Girl is lead by her conviction, her vision, her inspiration.
Unlike Joan of Arc, Flying Girl is in control of the fires and will not let them consume her. She recognizes that the miracle is all around her, every day, every moment. And her quest is in gentleness and acceptance. This is the power of ‘yes.’ This is the power of ‘now.’”

Rowena’s prints are affordably priced and make soulful, inspiring gifts for yourself or someone you love.

Kelly Rae Roberts has been selling like gangbusters lately and hardly needs a shout out from little ole’ me. But with the beautiful, inspiring images, I just couldn’t resist singing her praises in case one of you lovely readers out there is missing out. Wouldn’t Journey of the Heart make a wonderful, heartfelt gift for the soulsisters in your life? Or one of these necklaces would surely shore up your faith or nuture your creative spirit.

Finally, for those of you who still love a fresh box of Crayolas, Kara Jones at Mother Henna has just released a fun new project. It’s a coloring book to help you “come one step closer to your sacred self.” Remember the days when you got a new coloring book for the plane ride to grandma’s house? I definitely think you need this one for your next flight!

Who are your favorite soulful artists? Where will you be shopping for heartfelt, encouraging gifts this holiday season? Do tell in the comments below.

Rachelle Mee-Chapman is a soulcare specialist, writer, and mother(ish) to several. Based in Seattle, she’s now living the expat life in Copenhagen, Denmark. You can find her at Magpie Girl, friend her at Facebook, or follow her at Twitter.

Christian Conference features an All-Female Speaking Roster

2009-10-11T09:19:13-05:00

As I write this is the final day of Christianity 21 – a new kind of conference for A New Kind of Christian. C21 featured an entirely female speaking roster, but was not a women’s conference. (I know, shocking!) In fact, it has been reported that the men who are normally the big name speakers at these gigs (Doug Pagitt, Shane Clairborne, etc.) were all happily staffing the welcome tables and passing out the nametags.

I know, pinch me, right?

I will be the first to admit that one of the reasons I drifted away from the Emergent church movement was because I would meet all these amazing, progressive women at the conferences – and then walk into the main auditorium to watch the men speak. To be fair, there were loads of women presenting in the workshops. There were even some on the main stage. And yet, at every conference the women folk would also sit-in on sessions in which we explained to the men how systemic patriarchy –even within the emerging church – was still marginalizing women. At the last such conference I attended I remember sitting next to the very egalitarian Mark Oestreicher and saying, “I feel really sad, and I think it’s because I can’t believe I’m still explaining this.”

Shortly after that event it became clear to me that this was not my work. I began to see that I was called not to reform patriarchal structures from within, but to support women who were doing the reformational work outside of the organized church. So I said a bittersweet goodbye to the Emergent church and waited at a distance to see what happened.

Good things, it turns out.

My sisters who were called to stay and keep up the good work (and the brothers who “got it” and supported them) have broken some terrific ground. So it is with much pride and admiration that I features some of those women here today. All of these women spoke at Century 21, and all of them are doing innovative, progressive, creative work within church structures and/or within religious publishing. This collection features the handful who blog, and whom I know personally--either in real life or through our virtual connections. At their blogs you will find theology, motherhood, social justice, academic writing, creative writing, knitting…everything about their lives offered in a non-compartmentalized whole. I hope you will find new withmates amongst this circle, and that they will inspire you to live your religious and spiritual beliefs with bravery and gusto.

May there be many more such egalitarian conferences in the future!

Magpie Girl’s Century 21 Round Up:

Kelly Bean: author, social justice advocate, and keep of the Third Saturday soultribe in Portland, Oregon.

Nadia Bloz-Webber at Sarcastic Lutheran: tattooed lady, pastor of the House for All Saints and Sinners, and author of Salvation on the Small Screen: 24 Hours of Christian Television.

Julie Clawson at One Hand Clapping: mom, minister, participant in Emerging Women, and author of Everyday Justice.

Makeesha Fisher of Frenetic Peace: graphic designer, co-founder of Generate Magazine, and co-leader of a missional faith community in Fort Collins, Colorado, Revolution.

Nanette Sawyer of Perfectly Imperfect: Harvard grad, founding pastor of Wicker Park Grace, and author of Hospitality: Discovering the hidden power of invitation and welcome.

A Novel Approach to Menstruation and Spirituality

2009-10-05T06:38:55-05:00

Your period. Cramps, tampons, mood swings and…a spiritual experience? This week we’ll explore that connection with Jessica Schafer’s review of Anita Diamant’s The Red Tent. This review originally appeared at Living Sexuality, the blog of Clinical Sexologist Becky Knight. It was part of the Best Blog Series Ever. Period. – a week’s worth of posts on menstruation. (re-posted with permission)

Book Review: Anita Diamant’s The Red Tent
by Jessica Schafer

When I first read Anita Diamant’s novel The Red Tent three years ago, I had never thought about what menstruation was like for women thousands of years ago. If I had thought about it, I probably would have shuddered at the idea. The Red Tent made me think again. Sure, it was probably messy, with no tampons and only homemade rags as pads. It was also probably really unhygienic considering how little people bathed in general. But Diamant weaves a really compelling picture of what menstruation might have meant to women in pre-modern times.

Because The Red Tent is an incredibly rich and complex historical novel, I will just focus on two things that intrigued me about Diamant’s description of menstruation:

• It was a communal experience. The title refers to the tent women retired to at the New Moon at the onset of their period. They stayed together in the tent, sitting on straw, resting, relaxing and eating sweets for three days. During those three days they didn’t have to do any work and simply enjoyed being together and celebrating their days of rest.

• It was deeply spiritual. Fertility, symbolized by monthly bleeding, was a powerful and mysterious gift. Innana, the great mother was worshipped and thanked for the gift of life. I loved the rituals Diamant constructed around menstruation and the way the rituals deeply honored women and the power they bear.

One of the main characters describes menstruation to her daughter like this:

“The great mother whom we call Innana gave a gift to woman that is not known among men, and this is the secret of blood. The flow at the dark of the moon, the healing blood of the moon’s birth—to men, this is flux and distemper, bother and pain. They imagine we suffer and consider themselves lucky. We do not disabuse them.

- – -

In the red tent, the truth is known. In the red tent, where days pass like a gentle stream, as the gift of Innana courses through us, cleansing the body of last month’s death, preparing the body to receive the new month’s life, women give thanks—for repose and restoration, for the knowledge that life come from between our legs, and that life costs blood.”

What would change in your life if you could look forward to three days of withdrawal from the world, in which you could rest and celebrate your body? And what if you could spend those three days with your closest girlfriends, singing together, eating sweets together, massaging each others backs and listening to the stories of your lives? There would still be discomfort, cramps and everything else that comes along with it, but what if we saw it as an honor, something valuable enough to be celebrated?

The Red Tent is about much more than menstruation. It is a historical retelling of the story of Dinah, a character from the Old Testament in the Bible. Find out more about The Red Tent click here.

- – -

Jessica Schafer grew up in Germany as a missionary kid. She now works as a Resident Director at Trinity Western University. She is doing a long distance training program in spiritual direction through the Haden Institute and someday soon wants to start an MFA in poetry. She blogs at Between Words, is on twitter, and is offering you her favorite poems for spiritual sustenance in her guest post this week at Magpie Girl.

A Goy Girl's Guide to Yom Kippur

2009-09-27T06:01:35-05:00

Sunday night at sundown will mark the beginning of the Jewish fast of Yom Kippur, also known as the Day of Atonement. As a child growing up as a Christian I was always fascinated by this holiday celebrated by my religious cousins. It seemed to me to be the solemn yang to the celebratory ying of Rosh Hashanah, the Judaic New Year. (Hurrah! A new start!…Quick, get rid of all last year’s crap!) Being that both Christianity and Judaism are heavy on the sin and guilt, I felt a natural draw towards a major religious holiday that wiped the slate clean and let everyone start over. It seemed to me that having a day of forgiveness as an official holiday must be a big relief!

Many Jews must feel a similar happy relief at Yom Kippur, as synagogue attendance swells to two to three times it’s average numbers, and many secular Jews return for traditional prayers and rituals. Like most ancient rites, Yom Kippur is complex and includes fasting, ritualized bathing, chanting, confessions, blessings and more. Obviously, I’m not going to be able to get it all down pat. So here’s what this goy girl will do to mark Yom Kippur as a day of forgiveness and new beginnings, influenced heavily by my Soulsister Rachel Barenblat and her article 13 Ways of Looking at Yom Kippur.

1. Fasting: After an early supper with friends Sunday night I will complete a cleansing fast for 24 hours. I like how fasting is a physical sign of a spiritual process, literally clearing out the body as one focuses on cleansing the soul.

2. Wearing White. Donning white on Yom Kippur reminds us of both beginnings (marriage gowns) and ending (death shrouds). This is what we are, we humans, an endless cycle of dreamy promises and epic failures. But rather than lamenting this as a short falling, this year I will celebrate the reality that we are indeed like this --- this messed up, this clumsy, this awful -- and inversely that we are this wonderfully resilient, this insatiable, this determined to be our best self. Rachel says it better:

“Yom Kippur is a day for holding opposites in tension. Take the custom of wearing white (some men wear a white kittel; Hasidim and Renewalniks dress in all-white, as we do to welcome the Shabbat bride.) White is at once the color of weddings (when we make promises to one another) and the color of our burial shrouds (when all our promises become void). Our promises are unreal and unsustainable because we are dust -- and yet we make those promises and they matter deeply, because we are little less than angels.

To put it bluntly, we are angels with anuses. This is our central tension: that on the one hand we are holy beings, made in God's image and aspiring to holiness, and on the other hand we are corporeal beings who have to eat and excrete, who suffer and die. It's our job to balance those two realities -- though on Yom Kippur we aspire to live out our angelic nature for one long day of praise.”

3.Bathing: The ritualized Mikvah bath is beyond my reach, but I will submerge myself in a body of water today. If possible I will dip into the Oresound, but if the rain pours down I’ll probably bail out and allow the beautiful, silent grey-tile pool of my health club suffice. I’ll dip under the water four times, trying to echo the minhag ha-makon, a symbolic purification of body, heart, mind and spirit. Again, I love what Rachel has to say:

“Water, Rabbi Jill Hammer reminded us, is a solvent; it dissolves the spiritual schmutz we need to release. Also, water is where we come from -- both on a personal level, in the womb, and in a primordial sense, thinking back to the origins of life on earth.

Jumping into the water felt fantastic. It was soft and gentle, almost silky against my skin. I swam a little ways out, listening to the whoops and hollers and splashes. … Throughout, I kept thinking about how they say you can't jump in the same river twice. And it's true: in subtle ways I am not the same person who immersed in this lake last month before Shabbat or last October before Yom Kippur. But I carry those immersions with me -- the sweet sparkling feeling they engender -- and now I will carry this one, likely my last time touching living water until spring.”

4. Putting on Something New: According to Rachel, there are there new beginnings offered by her Rabbi each year:

“In Renewal circles, a Torah service generally involves three aliyot (sections of Torah), and each one is matched with a kavanah, an intention. Those who identify with that intention, or wish to receive its particular blessing, come up as a group to bless the Torah and to be blessed in return.”

In the morning Torah services, the first aliyah was for knowing we can bring our whole selves to our holy work; the second, for reclaiming the gifts that were ours but we cast them away; the third, for being an ish iti, a timely person connected with rhythms and cycles.”

I am accepting the second aliyah this year": “I reclaim the gifts that were mine which I cast away. (Or let others take from me.)” When I arise out of the water on Yom Kippur, this is what I will wear. This is what I will walk with this year --- even though I may face Gremlins, even though I may struggle with the Imposter Syndrome, even though I may at times think I am not enough. The aliyah says I can live otherwise, and for this I will wear white, to this I will make vows. To this I say “I give thee my troth.”

How will you celebrate Yom Kippur this year? What will you leave behind? What will you see redeemed? Please share with us in the comments below.

Other Resources for Yom Kippur:

If you are Jewish but live far from a synagogue: A Grab-Bag of Resources for Yom Kippur

If you want to learn an interfaith practice: Christians In Solidarity with Jews on Yom Kippur, A Liturgy

If you are religious, but in a sassy kind of way: Pardon All our Fucking Inequities at Killing the Buddha

If you want the basics How to Celebrate Yom Kippur from EHow.

Rachelle Mee-Chapman is a soulcare specialist, writer, and mother of several. Rooted in Seattle she’s now living the expat life in Copenhagen, Denmark. You can find her at Magpie Girl, follow her on Twitter, or friend her on Facebook. Thank you for being here!

Celebrating the Autumn Equinox 'Round the Table

2009-09-20T07:19:34-05:00

In the northern hemisphere, this Wednesday marks the Autumn Equinox, the first day of fall. How will you celebrate?

I’ve lived most of my adult life in climates that get a little hard to bear, Seattle WA, Vancouver BC, and Copenhagen, DK: all three of these gorgeous cities have one common downfall –-- a shortage of daylight. This means that I’ve gotten a little grumpy about fall over the years, seeing it as the forebearer to short days, long nights, and an overabundance of grey.

That’s why a few years ago our family started a tradition to help us celebrate the good bits of the season, and to start us off in an attitude of gratitude. We call it “The Annual Fall Chili Fest.” On or near the Autumn Equinox we invite a big group of people over to celebrate. Each friend arrives at the door with something to add to our family shrine---something to celebrate the season. Most people turn up with something from the earth: an apple, a chestnut, pretty autumn leafs. One year I even received a garland of bay leaves all strung on a thin wire. We watch the shrine transform from emptiness to abundance as one by one, items are added to its sacred space.

Once everyone arrives we load up the table with foods that bespeak of the crisp fall days that are to come, namely my famous Red and White Chili with Pineapple Salsa, rich Buttery Cornbread, and Apple Crisp with Ginger and Hazelnuts. Once we are all gathered ‘round the table with a bottle of microbrew or fresh-pressed apple juice in hand, we take turns offering toasts to all things Autumn. “Here’s to thick sweaters and Sunday afternoon Football!” (Hurrah!) “Here’s to going to the pumpkin patch!” (Hurrah!) “Here’s to not having to worry about tan lines!” (Hurrah! Hurrah! Hurrah!) After everyone has raised their glass, we dig into a our feast and celebrate the abundance of the season.

In this way we adjust our attitudes. We stop mourning the loss of Summer and start celebrating the goodness of Fall. We become a more grateful people, and we start the season with happy anticipation.

How do you celebrate the turning of the season from summer to fall? (Or, if you are in the southern hemisphere, how to you mark the shift from winter to spring?) What are your rites of thanksgiving and abundance? Do tell!

Recipes for Autumnal Goodness:
Gluten-Free Apple Pear Multigrain Muffins from Katrina’s Kitchen
Spiced Zucchini Bars with Cream Cheese Icing from On My Plate
Butternut Squash Puree from The Pioneer Woman Cooks
French Onion Soup Tutorial with Suzie the Foodie

Rachelle Mee-Chapman is a soulcare specialist, writer, and mama to several. You can find her at Magpie Girl, follow her on Twitter, or friend her on Facebook. Thanks for being here!

A Goy Girl's Guide to Rosh Hashanah

2009-09-13T04:35:57-05:00

Rocks for Rosh Hashanah: A Rememberance

It is time for us to celebrate Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year and a glorious new season. Friends have gathered here to perform the tashlikh, an ancient ceremony in which we cast stones into a body of water to symbolize that our sins and misdeeds are removed from us, and that we can begin our new year with a clean slate.

Although I have been ordained I am not, in the conventional sense, a very good Christian. I mess with the traditions too much, I make light of some of the more institutionalized rules. But as much as I am not a very good Christian, I am an even worse Jew—with only a tenuous blood line to make me ethnically legitimate, and a limited knowledge of the intricate practices. This year for the tashlikh, a friend of a friend has come, Erika, someone I‘ve never met before and who is much more legitimately Jewish than I. She‘s from New York. She says the prayers in Hebrew! Knowing this gives me pause, and I make my confession of inadequacy to our new guest. But Erika just laughs. “I‘m not a very good Jew either,” she says, “this last Passover we used a haggadah written by a gay woman rabbi, so a lot of my own people would have disowned me already, too.” We are, both of us, trying to find the connections from our past to our pre-sent, trying to weave together our personal story into so great a Holy story, so grace for one another abounds.

Part of our Rosh Hashanah practice is to symbolically rid ourselves of the regrets, mistakes, and wrong-doings from the past season of our living. To help us do this Fiona has brought us The Litany of Bridges by Heather McVoy, and we read aloud together:

“We who are in exile pray for bridges. We who are torn pray for mending. We who are alone pray for community. We who are in exile pray for bridges.”

We let this yearning build in us during a brief time of reflection. Then, having already donned our wet weather gear, we walked out into the rain and down the street to the grassy fields of Gasworks Park. While we walk we keep our eyes on the ground, stooping from time to time to gather up small stones. The rocks I stuffed in my pockets weighted the corners of my coat and felt hard under my fingertips. I turned them over in my hands until we reached the edge of the lake, the dark water splashing gently beneath us, the rain streaming down on our heads. There we spaced ourselves out along the shoreline, each of us readying to fling our stones into the water.

I held my stones in my hand, and turned my attention toward my six year old daughter, Eden, who was standing next to me. We took turns telling each other what our rocks represented and then tossed each one into the water. She did one. I did one. She did one. I did one. My four stones had sunk well below the waterline as Eden continues to toss in her seemingly endless supplies of pebbles.

“Eden,” I ask, “how many rocks do you have in there?”
“Oh!” she says cheerfully, “ten or twenty!”
Who knew a six year old had so much to regret?

As stood there casting our stones one by one, and away went our misdeeds and our errors, away went our blocks and our regrets, never to be seen again. It’s a surprisingly helpful ritual: the windup, the re-lease, the satisfying plunk of something sinking to where it cannot be retrieved.

Afterwards we walked back across the park through the rain and wind. The hostess in me fretted because of the inclement weather—many folks had refused the umbrellas I‘d proffered, and I worried that they would regret coming out into the wet night. But one friend, Alicia, set me at ease. “I’m glad for the rain,” she explained, “It makes the ritual feel more significant, more important, because we didn’t just stay inside warm and dry. We came out of our comfort zone to make a new start. I like it wet and rainy this way.”

Back at the house we stripped off our wet jackets and thawed our hands around warm mugs. I brought out a chocolate cake with pears and walnuts, the sweet dessert becoming a symbol of hope, and we laid forkful after forkful on our tongues as a prayer for the year to come.

Resources for celebrating Rosh Hashanah:

Celebrate the Feasts, a book for Christians who want to learn the feast of the Torah, by Martha Zimmerman.

Beginning to Reflect as We Approach Rosh Hashanah from Rabbi Baum at Our Jewish Community

L’Shana Tovah, a personal reflection on Rosh Hashanah by Magpie Ima

Reflections from The Velveteen Rabbi: Rosh Hoshanah: Holding On, Letting Go and Honeyed Expectations.

How Rosh Hashanah Works at How Stuff Work.com.

Rachelle Mee-Chapman is a Seattle-based soulcare specialist, mother, and writer living the ex-pat life in Copenhagen, Denmark. You can find her at Magpie Girl, follow her at Twitter, or friend her at Facebook. Thank you for being here. Shalom!

Rites of Passage for Back to School

2009-09-06T10:47:03-05:00

It's back to school season with the last of the schools in the U.S. starting up after this Labor Day weekend comes to a close. Children are trying on outfits, putting their names on backpacks and picking out new lunchboxes. But beyond the ritual of buying schools supplies, what can you do to create a sacred space around going back to school?

Starting a new grade is a big rite of passage for children -- one that more often than not goes by unnoticed. In the flutter, hurry and relief(!) of finally getting those kids back in school, busy parents don't have a lot of time to mark the moment. So here are 3 easy ways to honor the back to school process.

1. Special Breakfast. For many years I had a habit of making the children a special breakfast for the first day of school. The food wasn't that fancy, just French toast and orange juice usually. But I made a special effort to set the table nicely, maybe with flowers or pretty napkins. I left a note on each of their plates with an affirmation for the year -- my hopes for them that season. "May you make friends who love and respect you." Or "This year - long division with ease!" Other options: a scripture verse to guide the year, or a favorite quote or poem about growing up, challenges, or surprises.

2. Growth Spurt: Many people have a practice of taking a photo of their children on the first day of school. Why not take it in front of something that can measure their changing height as the grow -- say, with the same door frame in the background, or the swingset poles besides them. When they come home from school the first day, lay all the photos out in a row on the coffee table and let them celebrate how much they've grown.

3. Dreamboards. This year for back to school I made a collage for each of my girls with my hope for their learning experiences this year (both in and out of school.) I'm hoping that Cate will learn to love reading just a little bit more. (Time to give in and start buying graphic novels.) And my dream for Eden is that she discover ways to challenge her learning (even in the laid-back Danish skole system.) Both girls loved their pictures and we've hung them in the entry hall to keep those dreams fresh in our minds. This practice is especially nice because you can do it even if the kids' first day has already passed.

What do you do to celebrate the first day of school. What ritual or practice do you use to mark this rite of passage?

Rachelle Mee-Chapman is a mom, writer, and soulcare specialist from Seattle, now living the ex-pat life in Copenhagen, Denmark. You can find her at Magpie Girl, follow her on Twitter, or friend her on Facebook. Thank you for being here!

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Finding Balance

2009-08-30T15:34:06-05:00

Tonight I was having dinner with a friend of mine who is a business professor at a prestigious graduate school. While the guys grilled the steaks, she and I wandered around my studio with our glasses of wine. We stopped in front a my wall of dreamboards – a series of collages embodying my intentions month by month. When we got to one that said “Do Less,” she sighed a little and said, “Tell me this Rachelle, do you think someone can ever get all their ducks in a row?” My reply? “Not if you have too many ducks.”

Getting our ducks in a row. Getting a handle on things. Doing less. It’s all a part of our every and on-going attempt to find balance. Balance, you see, is not a solid state. It’s fluid. You have to keep making small adjustments to keep it. If you remain perfectly stagnant, you fall down.

So here are some tips about balance. Most of them are from Balance Week at Jamie Ridler Studios. (Thanks Jamie, for the round up.) Why not click around and see if you (and your ducks) can find some ying to your yang.

Think you can’t find balance until you get enough done to sit still? Not necessarily. Danette Relic of The Drawing Board reminds us that “balance is what happens when we are in motion.” Find her advice about balance and The Dance of Choice here.
Annabel Fitzsimmons of Clear Space also came by Jamie Ridler’s studio for Balance week and reminded us in her post that balance can look different from one day to the next.

“Today, balance for me meant taking 20 minutes to journal at the end of the day and grabbing a cuddle with my husband after taking care of a sick newborn and toddler on three hours sleep. But tomorrow balance might be going out for a 5km run, pitching an article, writing a press release, teaching a couple of classes and returning all my outstanding phone calls.”

Living in another culture often teaches us new lessons about lifestyle and balance. So here’s What the Danes Taught Me About Balance. I’ve also been writing a lot about living with fewer ducks, which is an important part of balance keeping. You can learn How to Choose the Essentials with me, which will help a lot. Then follow along with my series on wellness and balance posts, The DO LESS Revolution. The DO LESS Revo is back on line this Friday, continuing on the first Friday of each month. Come learn along with us.

May you have peace, calm, and balance in your life this week. Shalom!

Rachelle Mee-Chapman is a soulcare specialist, writer, and mother-of-several. With roots in Seattle, she’s now living the the ex-pat life in Copenhagen, Denmark. You can find her at Magpie Girl, follow her at Twitter, or friend her at Facebook. Thanks for being here!

More Life Coach Types You Can Learn From (For Free)

2009-08-23T14:00:00-05:00

I don’t know about you, but that little cache of advice from last week’s Life Coaches – score! It was like finding a treasure chest full of good-for-your-soul booty. So without further ado, let’s dive right into this week’s helpful collection, shall we?

There’s an Envy Epidemic going on out there in the blogosphere. Have you noticed? Perhaps, you, like me has caught a touch of it. There seems to be a flair up of insecurity and envious thoughts before, during, and after BlogHer conferences, and this season’s outbreak is still in full bloom. Envy may be one of the seven deadly sins, but only if you don’t treat it with the proper course of antivirals. Give it a good dose of soulcare and it turns into something golden. Jennifer McGuiggan, an Envy Epidemic survivor and wise soulsister, has written a monumentally helpful post, Turning Envy into Inspiration over at The Word Cellar. This piece is pithy, practical, and works like an immunization for your soul. Check it out, and pass it along—someone you know has probably caught The Envy too.

Do you like to live on the growing edge of ideas and creativity? Me too! But damn, it can be like an episode of Survivor out there if you don’t have some survival gear. Thankfully Dee Wilcox at The Creative Perch is offering an excellent 20+ part series on How to be an Innovator. I’m reading one post in the series each week as I beat the Envy bug and get on to do my own work. Come on by, there’s plenty of help and inspiration to go around.

Have you got crazy makers dragging you down? I know you’re a creative, passionate soul, and you want to help people. But perhaps you’ve got a few people who don’t really want to help themselves in your posse, or you’ve let a few crazy makers slip into your team. It’s okay to say goodbye to these folks who deflate your spirits and rain on your dreams. Christine Reed at The Bliss Chick has a fun-spirited post Picking a Practically Perfect Positive Posse, with tips and reason for including positive souls in your circle. (Live in or near Cleveland? Check out Christine’s course The Creative Dig: excavating self-identity and story through paint, clay and words.)

Does the slightest bit of not-so-positive feedback knock the wind out of you? Ah, you tender soul. It’s okay. We can all relate. The good news is, receiving critique, feedback or criticism well and with less pain is a skill you can learn. That’s right. It doesn’t just have to come naturally! You can learn how to do it! (Oh, I feel much better already.) Creative Coach Jamie Ridler has been kind enough to tell us how in a couple of very basic, very doable steps. Just pop over to my place and read her guest post on Creativity, Feedback, and Our Tender Hearts.

See you next week with one more round of wonderful on-line life coaches. Love one of these ladies? Remember, most of them offer coaching or courses on line, so give them a ring for some one-on-one support.

Life Coaches You Can Learn from (For Free!)

2009-08-16T08:43:12-05:00

One of the best things you can do for yourself as you move through this thing called life, it to build a team of wise, supportive souls around you. I call this “Team (insert your name here).” My team has a big rotation. People play for awhile, are benched for awhile, and rotate back in depending on what part of the journey I’m on at any given moment. This lets everyone show their stuff, and then gives everyone a break. I do the same by playing on other people’s teams. It works out great.

A fantastic person to have on your team is a Life Coach. What is a Life Coach? A Life Coach is someone one who helps you identify and achieve goals. Unlike traditional therapy, which spends a good deal of time reaching back into your past, coaching tends to concentrate on the present and propels you into the future. Also, in my experience, coaching tends to concentrate more on function and what is working for you, or what I like to call “praxis.” It focuses less on trying to dissect and repair dysfunction, and instead encourages you to move deeper into the functioning areas of your life.

Life Coaching began in the business milieu, but has now branched out into wider venues. There’s a particularly great crop of Life Coaches out there right now who specialize in helping creatives. Creative types are a group of folks who tend to have big dreams and tender souls—which equates into needing a great big team at the ready. So thank goodness these Creative Life Coaches are at the ready!

Kelly Q a college counselor blogging at Relax, No Really and offers us this short, sweet and spot-on post on how to coach teenagers. I love how the image on this post looks both like a flower and a wisp of smoke. As a teen coach, both of these images work for me. You want to notice and encourage what is growing in these young souls, and you want to fan the fire when their heartfelt passions begin to come to life. It’s good medicine.

Michelle at When I Grow Up is a certified life coach with spunky, slightly random style that makes her a girl after my own heart. Her post Yes (Wo)man has good advice about sussing out what you do for love, what you do for money, and how you can make the mesh—or when to decide to let them live separately. She also has a good FAQ which answers basic questions about coaching in general, and long-distance e-coaching in specific.

And speaking of Life Coaches with a quirky distinctive style, Havi at The Fluent Life tends to make appearances with a duck. Yes, a duck. Despite that (or perhaps because of it) she’s incredibly good and focusing in on the point and just getting down to business. This year a big goal of mine is to start charging the going-rate for my own coaching work, so Havi’s post on Why Do I Charge So Much is really shoring me up. Maybe it will help you too.

Okay, I’ve got more out there for you, I really do. But seriously folks, this list is enough to keep you well read and inspired for at least a week. Let’s not overwhelm our synapses, shall we? Tune in next week for another list of fabulous, online coaching resources. And get to work recognizing and building your team, because as I have been known to say, “There ain’t no place to go but together.”

What online coaching resources do you turn to? Do you have a Life Coach you love? Do tell in the comments below!

Rachelle Mee-Chapman is a soulcare specialist, writer, and mother-to-several. She’s a Seattle homegirl living the ex-pat life in Copenhagen, Denmark. You can find her at Magpie Girl, follower her at Twitter and friend her on Facebook. Thanks for being her.

Mean People Suck: The Antidote

2009-08-09T08:21:18-05:00

This Summer I spent seven lovely weeks in the U.S. trying to re-group, re-fuel, and re-charge my weary soul. I was a bit beat-up after 18 months struggling away in a sometimes charming but often isolating Nordic culture. I was worn out down to the bones, and I mean deeply soul weary. The kind of thing where if you can get out of bed, you are probably still gonna cry about something at some point in the day. You know what I mean?

After a few weeks of gorgeous northwest views, hearing my children giggle again, and seeing my eldest flash me a few genuine, unrehearsed smiles – not to mention a soul-soak with the Soulsisters -- I got sort of marginally healed-up. It was the kind of healed-up where maybe you are not so reliant on the antidepressants, but really the slightest thing might throw out out of remission. I felt hopeful – not super stable, but hopeful. Then, just before leaving, my daughter broke her ankle. So we grabbed our ice pack and headed out to spend 9 hours on a red-eye overseas flight. And the first thing that happened was our flight attendant chewed me out for not ordering a wheelchair early enough. Then when I landed on Nordic soil another airline person was was rude to me. Then someone broke a piece of my luggage. This seriously impacted the much anticipated leap-in-to-his-arms-for-kisses reunion with my husband, and instead I dissolved into a puddle of tears the moment I saw him.

Seriously, mean people suck.

That’s why I’m so grateful for the bevy of bloggers out there who are 100% dedicated to the soul enriching practice of being kind. I know, it’s very air-fairy-pie-in-the-sky to think that something as simple as being nice matters. But it matters. It really matters. If Mean People are the contagion, then Kind People are the cure. For instance, there’s Jenn Gibson and Amanda Oaks over at Kind Over Matter who highlight nice things on a weekly basis. From supporting artists, to free give-away’s, Jen and Amanda spread kindness like dandelion seeds. This Summer they invited me to play and together with Jamie Ridler and Brandi Reynolds at Joy Rebel we made pretty affirmation cards, which you can still download for free. Why not print them now for yourself, or to spread a little soulcare around?

Then there’s Keri Smith and her workbook, How to be a Guerilla Artist, which inspired Jen Lemen to send Hope Notes to Rwanda, who in turn inspired Krysytn Heide to launch a Hope Revolution. These two gals keep spreading the love and you can play too, because hope dances in a thousand places. And if you like notes, don’t miss Melissa and her Nice Notes at Operation Nice. (I mean, what could be easier?)

And just in case you need one more kind thing to tide you over this week, there’s this colorful, inspiring poster available free at The Bliss Chick. It’s perfection for all Wild Women who need a little injection to their souls, and it’s coming to you live from the ingenious mind of Daisy Bones.

What is your antidote to mean people? How do you spread a little kindness around? The comments are open…do tell!

Rachelle Mee-Chapman is an alt.minister, writer and mother-of-several living the ex-pat life in Copenhagen, Denmark. You can find her at Magpie Girl, follow her on Twitter, or friend her at Facebook. Thank you for being here!

How to Build a Knitting Soultribe

2009-08-03T00:06:05-05:00

A few months ago I listened to a TAL episode entitled The Giant Pool of Money. It's an excellent explanation of the mortgage crises that is sweeping the nation - but for right now that's neither here nor there. The reason I mention it is that the title burrowed its way into my brain, and now all I can think of is the phrase "A Giant Pool of Wisdom." It's a good phrase, don't you think? And I am confident that we an form such a pool. In fact, I know that we already have enough wisdom to fill that pool to overflowing. We've just got to share it.

So in our on-going efforts to figure out how to create our own Soultribes, I'm dipping into the pool and bringing up refreshing goodness one ladle at a time. To begin, I'm happy to introduce the very sassy, very funny friend Melissa Lindgren as our first guest in the Soultribe Practitioner Interview Series.

Melissa and I met at our former Soultribe, Monkfish Abbey. Now she is a Soultribe facilitator hosting a knitting and storytelling group in Seattle, Washington. In this interview she talks about gathering her tribe, adjusting expectations, and figuring out what she values in a Soultribe.

Mis, Could you tell us what kind of Soultribe you belong to: What do you call it? How big is it? How often do you meet? How long have you been together as a group?

For the last 8 months a group of friends and I have come together to knit. We calling it "The Knitting Group" or simply "Knitting" (I tried "The Knitstas" and "The Knitta's" but they really didn't take) It started out with about 15 of us and has shrunk to about 8.

What was it about story that made you want to form a group around storytelling? What do you think is valuable in sharing our stories?

My University of Washington research has centered on knitting and storytelling as tools to form community. As I've drifted further and further away from concrete concepts of spirituality, and even further from conventional forms of church, I was in need of a weekly group that could give my life more rhythm and community. So I started a knitting group and began researching how telling stories and knitting together can form a powerful community.

I wanted to add stories to a knitting circle, because I'm in the business of stories. It's what I do. I think there are a lot of things we do that are instinctive to us. And some of us are lucky when our interests also have a long history of being important, as it gives us meaning and a certain sense of legitimacy.

Stories are something so very basically human--they are a way of being remembered, remembering, owning, teaching, loving, laughing, being known...And I am drawn to stories for all of those reasons. But the real reason I included stories in my knitting group is because I love to hear a good story, I'm good at telling my own, and that's how I wanted to wile the Seattle evenings away.

It is in no way lost on me that I chose a traditionally women-oriented craft (knitting) with another craft that has a somewhat complicated relationship with women (story-telling/having a voice). My group was really intentioned to be a space that glorified the story more than the storyteller--I wanted to hear well-crafted stories--stories that had a lot of depth, intrigue, humor, and suspense.

What does your typical evening together look like? Who decides what you will do together? Who facilitates?

I'm the facilitator, I decide. :-) I started this group as a way to get together with my friends and as an independent study for my B.A. in English. The goal was to come together and knit and tell stories. I sent out emails every week telling people the topic of the stories and re-iterating the location (my living room).

Though people participated in the story-telling it really wasn't what was driving the group. So I backed off with the stories and just sort of let the group chit and chat where it wanted. These were decisions i more or less made on my own, but were usually bounced off of a friend or two in the group.

What kind of people attend? How did you initially find and gather these folks? How do people find you now that you've been around for a while?

The kind of people who attend are the out-going-est of my friends who are interested in knitting. I initially invited everyone I wanted to see on a weekly basis, but it has shrunk to people who need some sort of weekly outside social group. Though it sometimes feels like we are cousins with lives completely known to each other, often someone in the group will invite an unknown visitor who we all smother and gawk over. :-) Some people just want a lesson in knitting or are stuck in a project and come to get help and then fade back into their normal Wednesday night routines without us.

How long did it take your group to gel? What was that process like? If you got to a sticky point where you weren't sure it was working out, how did you know to press on? When did you know you had "clicked" together?

Hmm. There was a core group that already knew and liked each other. If other people were uncomfortable or weren't having fun, they just didn't come back. I often tried to bribe them back because my core group needs to expand itself a little more. My bribes weren't very bribe-y though.

I had a couple people who came who were young, loud, and didn't listen to other people's stories. It was greatly irritating and slightly amusing. But the point, at least at first, was to knit and learn to tell great stories. So the next week, I added that after each story 3 questions would have to be asked to the teller before we could move on to the next story. This was to help our listening skills and our story telling skills (it's a good practice to examine why we include or exclude certain parts of a story). But the noisy youngin's didn't come back. And I eventually took them off the email list. I have to admit I felt relieved when they didn't come back, but I also felt old. Very very old. (Rachelle says: I would like to insert here, that Melissa is in her twenties and one of my youngest friends, so the old things is kind of cracking me up.)

Why do you think people come to your group? What does being together do for you? What are the benefits of belonging to this kind of Soultribe?

Right now, people come to hang out. But there were a couple months in there that people came to connect in a soft comfortable way.

I once asked the group what kind of stories they loved to hear and it was always stories that were personal, stories the teller had connected to. When I asked what kind of listener they liked to tell stories to, they described someone who could enjoy the details and the setup, feel sad at the sad parts, feel tense at the build-up, and laugh at the jokes (even if they weren't the best of jokes). Basically they not only described themselves, they described someone who could connect to their stories. And that's why we met for awhile--to connect to each other through our stories.

What did you think your group would be like? How did it actually turn out? What's that like for you?

I thought all sorts of different friends would come together and eventually we would be the group that when it was your turn to tell a story, you put your knitting down and walked around the room telling these grand stories (and the group size would be about 10-15 of the closest wisest and funniest people).

But really we just sort of sat in our chairs unless getting a snack or asking for help and told stories that almost always started out with "Heh, that reminds me of this one time..."

It was a little sad for me at first. And it made my research project a little harder. But there were several meetings that were exactly what I wanted, which felt great. But it takes a surprising amount of planning, creativity, intentionality and tenacity to get a group of people to willingly do what you want. It's like herding kittens-or worse, herding children. I mean, most people don't naturally want to do what you want them to, and this is something worth grappling with. And drinking about.

What would you have done differently in the early days of your Soultribe? What did you do that worked well in the early days of your Soultribe's development?

I think I would have been more specific in wanting it to center around stories more. I thought that I could just sort of sneak them in and people would automatically respond with great stories and accolades of "I HAVE FOUND MY VOICE!" I think I lacked a certain confidence in my desire.

What did work were comfy chairs and snacks. Every time. And good snacks too. Also, re-assuring people many, many times that it was ok if they didn't know how, they could learn to knit. Many people learned to knit for the first time, or learned something new.

What other tidbits would you like to add to our giant pool of wisdom?

One thing I wish I would have been told as a kid, was that there is no way one person was going to be everything you needed. Oh the agonizing conversations in my head, "My partner makes me laugh and treats me with so much respect and love...but he doesn't know how to talk about books...we're probably not meant to be together!" I have learned to include more people in my interaction needs. And it has made my relationships so much richer now that the pressure is off.

The same, I think, could be said of Soultribes. I think they are capable of being a central community for people but most likely not the ONLY community--which is something probably more obvious to the group than the facilitator.

Okay now readers, your turn! What ideas and inspirations grabbed you after hearing Melissa's story? What questions do you have for one another? What are you taking away (or putting in to) the Giant Pool of Wisdom today? Feel free to muse away in the comments below....

Rachelle Mee-Chapman is an alt.minister, knitter, and mother-to-several. Her favorite knitting websites include Yarn Harlot, Rose Kim Knits, and Craft Leftovers. You can find Rachelle at Magpie Girl, follow her on Twitter or friend her on Facebook. Thank you for being here.

Wonderful Soulcare ECourses for Late Summer/Early Autumn

2009-07-26T23:28:26-05:00

Have you noticed that the binder aisle is already out at Target? I know. Already!I don’t know about you, but when my children go back to school I start yearning for a class as well. If you live in certain parts of the world school starts next month. Or if you are one of those lucky folks who gets vacation until September, it will still be back-to-school time before you know it. Why not plan taking class in soulcare this late Summer or Fall? There are several good on-line courses to choose from, some of which are self-paced for those of you with complicated schedules, and all of which are reasonably priced.

IF you need help naming and achieving a creative, business, or personal dream, try life coach Andrea Sher and uber-dreamer Jen Lemen with their very first course on naming and reaching your big BIG dreams. Here’s their description for Mondo Beyondo: An On-Line Class about Dreaming Big, (begins Aug 24th).

“What happens when you give an unspoken wish a place to become a dream come true? How do you gather the courage required to help a new found dream soar? Join seasoned dreamers Andrea Scher and Jen Lemen this fall as together we explore Mondo Beyondo--the powerful point of view that transforms our deepest dreams into practical realities.

This five week online class complete with inspiring lessons, real life stories, secret missions, audio interviews and hands-on activities will help you take your dreams from the realm of wishing into everyday motion. Supported by Andrea and Jen as your able guides and exclusive access to a community of dreamers, you'll find yourself equipped with the perfect tools and the just right atmosphere to take the risks you've always dreamed of.”

IF you need a picturesque way of finding your core and understanding your place in your world, try Susannah Conway’s gorgeous courses. These aren’t photography classes, but use simple photo assignments along with reflective writing exercises to help students find their center in their everyday, physical surroundings. I have no photography experience, and I’m taking the first course. I’m totally loving it! It’s both insightful and beautiful. These popular classes fill-up fast, so sign up for Susannah’s mailing list to get first dibs.

Unravelling: Ways of Seeing My Self
This is the original course, which “…takes you on a photo safari into your own life to reconnect with who you are, where you’ve been and where you want to go next.

Unravelling Further: Exploring the Senses a new, second course which “…will deepen this new-found connection to self, exploring the joys of sensual living as you reawaken your senses one by one.”

IF you need art to help you move through a grieving process, consider The heART of Life and Death with Kara Jones at Mother Henna. Just in time for Dia des Los Muertos (Day of the Dead), Mother Henna is offering an arts=based course in dealing with grief and recovery. There are several ways to take the course, from an inexpensive self-directed version, to a package which includes personal sessions. The heART of Life and Death is “…open to all regardless of where you are on the path. Grieving, loving, practicing, hurting, healing, in any circumstance, any background or education or art experience level. All are welcome.”

What would your dream ecourse be about? What on-line courses have shored up your spirit? Tell us in the comments below!

Rachelle Mee-Chapman is an alt.minister, writer, and mother-of-several living as a Seattle ex-pat in Copenhagen, Denmark. You can find her at Magpie Girl, follow her at Twitter, or friend her at Facebook. Thank you for being here.

Resources for a Soulful Retreat

2009-07-19T20:21:13-05:00

I wake up before as the sun is just rising over the horizon, tingeing the sky with light and calling the trees out of the darkness. The green fleece saddle blanket is warm around me and I rub my feet together in a subconscious ritual of awakening. I am a little stiff from my night on the couch (a side effect of insomnia, this wandering and sleeping in odd places.) Still, despite the stiffness, there’s not much that could make me happier than to be here on an island retreat with my murmur of Soulsisters.

Ten of us have gathered here on the Sound, carving out for ourselves the Soultribe we could not find elsewhere. We range in age from our 40s’ to our teens. We are single-married-divorced. We are child free by choice or circumstance. We are in the process of raising offspring. We are employed and freelance. We are starting out. We are established. We live in 3 countries, 4 states, and one province. The one thing we have in common is that all of us need a Tribe – not to define who we are, but to support who we are. Not a place of rules and membership guidelines, but just a place to be. That’s what we are doing here on our island retreat, under our green blankets, at the dawning of day.

Already, with just one afternoon and evening behind us, I am fully convinced that this was worth it. The time and the money and the travel; the risk and the “jump!” and the Gremlins. Something good is getting itself born. And we will help you get your something good born too. So in the words of Jen Lemen, “what ever you do hold on to hope…”, your Soultribe is coming. Our’s arrival here is a harbinger of good things to come.

Maybe you too need a retreat – either alone or with your soultribe. If so, here are some amazing resources of places to land. Most of them are in the Western half of the North America. But if I know you, dear readers, you will have opinions about this and resources to share. So please put your favorite retreat places in the comments below. We need you to add to the Giant Pool of Wisdom, forming now.

May peace greet you find a place to sooth your soul and restore your spirit today.

Namaste.

________________________________

Our Lady of the Rock, Washington: Join the Benedictine sisters who run this charming farm and raise Cotswold sheep. Engage in Ora et Labora (prayer and work) for a few days, or a few weeks. You’d be hard pressed to find a prettier chapel, or a more peaceful island. Contact the guest mistress for visitations.

St. Placid Priory, Washington: Not far outside of Seattle lies a retreat wonder in the midst of the suburbs. The Priory is a small monastic community offering directed or non-directed retreat on their quiet grounds. Pray the hours with the nuns, eat communally or in silence, receive healing touch, or avail yourself of a course on “Sketchbook to God.” Sliding scale rates are available.

Mt Carmel Retreat Center, Ontario: An ecumenical retreat center, Mt. Carmel is practically perched on the edge of Niagara Falls. Power and beauty awaits you in this tranquil and moving setting.

The House of Bread Monastery Bethlehem Retreat Center, British Columbia: Pray in the chapel, take a hike on the property, or swim on the lake – there are many ways to restore you body and souls at the simple, lovely retreat on Vancouver Island.

Labyrinths Everywhere: Take a mini-retreat by walking a labyrinth. Find one just about anywhere with the World Wide Labyrinth Locator. (Bear in mind this sites lists mazes as well as true labyrinths, but does a good job of distinguishing between the two in the descriptions.

Where do you got to make retreat? Tell us in the comments below….

Rachelle Mee-Chapman is a Seattle-based alt.minister dedicated to helping Soultribes get born. You can find her at Magpie Girl, follow her on Twitter, or friend her on Facebook. Thank you for being here.