chris's blog

BackTalk:Caffeinated Kids

2009-06-17T09:16:23-05:00

Do you let your children drink coffee? What about caffeinated soda? What about those energy drinks, like Red Bull?

On this weeks show we explore this topic.

I say in the piece that when I was growing up I drank coffee all the time. My step-father's family was Italian and it was just customary for everyone, including the children, to have a cup of coffee after dinner. For the children it was mostly milk with a little coffee added, and a lot sugar. It was also served in these small jelly jar glasses. As the years went on gradually the coffee became less milk and more coffee. Even now all of these years later drinking coffee out of a glass mug makes me nostalgic.

The same family also served wine during dinner to all the kids. So, you know, take that for what it is worth.

I allow my teenagers to drink coffee in the morning. My one child with ADHD it helps to settle down and focus while we wait for his medication to kick in. My other son just likes to grab a cup of coffee and sprawl on the sofa with it until he is fully awake.

The younger children don't regularly drink coffee, though I will allow them to have sips here and there and when they have to be up exceptionally early for something I'll give them a small cup. For my younger children I treat coffee the same way I treat soda. It is okay now and then. Anyone who knows me in real life will tell you that I am not one of those parents who is afraid to tell my children, "No." I am allowed to have either because I am an adult and one of the benefits that you get as an adult is the ability to make choices about things that are not afforded to you when you are a child. Otherwise what would be the fun of being a grown-up, right?

Having said that, I rarely drink soda and usually only have one cup of coffee in the morning.

When my children say that when they grow up they are going to do anyything they want I laugh because I remember thinking that adulthood would be a free for all. Apparently my children are going to drink soda, pausing only to throw candy into their mouths while riding mortorcycles without helmets.

Backtalk- What Did YOU Talk Back About?

2009-05-23T00:36:36-05:00

So this month we talked about breastfeeding, vacationing with your children, and blogging about teenagers. As long as you aren't blogging about breastfeeding your teenager while on vacation you probably have good company in the momosphere.

On the topic of teenagers, I said in the piece that my oldest son had asked me to pretend that he didn't exist. He did feel that way for awhile, more worried that I would share embarrassing stories about him than anything else. I do write about him now and I think we have come to an unspoken agreement. I mostly talk about him in the sports related arena or share stories that paint him in a good light. I assure the internet that he is not perfect, though my blog might suggest otherwise. Oh wait, my sons says to tell the internet he IS perfect. So, um, ok.

Melisa from Suburban Scrawl writes in the comment section:

I am very careful to not write publicly about anything that would mortify or embarrass them (though sometimes it's hard to hold back!), but they do know that as a writer, I, well, WRITE. I write about family and as two important members of the family, they are included in my blog.

TXMoppet from Canned Laffs agrees, but takes it one step further:

The kids determine what and how much info I share about them. Outgoing 18 year old boy loves to be photographed and in the spotlight. Shy 14 year old girl permits no photos or overly specific stories.

Casa De Cruz allows her daughter to determine what stories are blogged:

I have a 15 yr old and I clear all incidents with her before I blog them. She is also the reason I run a PG-13 blog. Though I would love to be a bit edgier, knowing my daughter reads it keeps me reined in. That's just the way it is.... But the private life of my daughter is pretty much off limits. It's a fine line.

Jozet asks us to consider what happens when the shoe is on the other foot:

A whole other post might be how do parents handle when their kids start blogging/Facebooking about *them*. Because it comes around, and payback - even all in good fun - is, as they say, a female dog.

Yikes! I am plugging my ears. La la la, I can't hear you. Though I would hope that the respect I have shown my kids would be returned.

And I think most people agreed about vacationing with children.

Amber wrote:

I believe vacations with children are not really vacations. Sometimes you have the perk of someone to clean up after you, which is great. But a whole family crammed into a small space, kids out of routine, and long days can make for not a lot of fun. I like the good memories, but I definitely feel like I need another vacation when I arrive home.

Personally I think we need a different word to describe vacationing with children.

Leighbra thinks that vacationing with her children gives her a new perspective on the places that they travel:

I've personally found that when we vacation WITH the kids, we see and do more neat things that are specific to the area. We do the National Parks' Junior Ranger programs and learn about the area w/o paying a guide, we fish, we look for butterflies/flowers/toy shops

It was a great month of shows here at Backtalk, filled with videos and comments from you. Thanks for being a part of the show.

And as always if you have anything that you think should be featured on Backtalk, let us know.

Coming Up on Backtalk: Is It Really a Vacation If You Bring the Children?

2009-05-15T10:15:30-05:00

"How was your vacation?" a friend asked shortly after I returned home from our latest family trip.

"I think one day I will look back on it and remember it as fun." That was the best answer I could give.

Next week on Backtalk we are talking about the family vacation. Is it calm and serene or is it more like a Chevy Case movie?

I happen to believe that a vacation with young children is an oxymoron.

When I said this out loud my oldest son piped up, "Vacation with children is for morons?" Uh sure, that will work too.

I think back to our last family vacation. There were moments of fun for sure... spending time at the beach, eating ice cream, bicycling downhill.

But there were also moments that were stressful... like when our upstairs neighbors at the inn where we were staying kept yelling at us to stop slamming our room doors because they were trying to sleep. We weren't slamming the doors, they were just sticky and loud when closed. And I am sorry they didn't want to wake up at 7:00am on their vacation. I apologized, but really I was jealous because I bet they at least got to have sex and stay out past 9pm.

There were moments that I thought would be fun, but instead really sucked...like bike riding. I am not sure why I thought bike riding on vacation would be more enjoyable than bike riding in my everyday life. The bike paths on the side of the roads were so narrow. I felt like at any given moment one of the children would swerve out into the road and be run over.

Also, my husband and children are some sort of freak robotic mutants who approach all athletic endeavors as if it were a matter of life or death. I felt like I was on a forced death march (death cycle?) half the time.

And I didn't even mention the tantrums and bickering. Or the packing and unpacking, which generally takes more time than the entire vacation.

Luckily I am really good at repressing bad stuff. So ask me how my trip was in a couple of months and I'll be all, "Wow, it was the best trip, EVER." It is that sort of revisionist history that enables me to happily plan the next vacation. And the next.

It isn't all bad. It is just that vacationing with children is a completely different thing than vacationing alone. Expectations need to be lowered. You need to embrace the idea that most of your fun will be vicariously through your children.

Not long ago I wrote a series for BlogHer about traveling to Disney World.

Other places to read about vacationing with children. The good, the bad, the hilarious.

Moolanomy

Missives From Suburbia

7 Miles to Nowhere

Miller Mayhem

Working Moms Against Guilt

Coming Up Next Week : The Mom Body

2009-04-17T22:40:13-05:00

I have written before that I wish I had appreciated the body I had when I was twenty. I wish I had known that it was as good as it was ever going to get.

In this episode we are talking about mom bodies. Love 'em, hate 'em, if you have given birth you have one. We will discuss bloggers who are accepting their bodies just as they are and others who are working to change them. Anyone else a Shredhead?

We are working on our upcoming episodes and would love to feature you! The topics include:

1) Breastfeeding? Is there anything left to say about it? Apparently there is. Have you written a post on the topic?

2) Are you parenting teens? Do you blog about what it is like to parent them? Do you draw a line on what you are willing to share about your teens? Is the line different from what you are willing to write about younger children?

3) Vacation all you ever wanted, except with children can it really be called a vacation? Do you have any tips for making vacations more enjoyable for everyone? Any vacation stories you want to share? Send us a link, or upload a video.

This Week on Backtalk: Family Size

2009-04-15T15:10:52-05:00

Whether you have one child or 18 children, there is always someone with an opinion about the size of your family. And they are often not afraid to tell you.

At this point in my parenting tenure I most often laugh at the comments rather than be offended. I am not sure if that is because I have grown used to the constant comments, or if I have more patience now. I have heard all the comments. There are no new original ones. Most of the time people ask questions because of their genuine curiosity, or at least that is what I chose to believe. Seldom is it their intention to be rude. And honestly, it is all blog fodder now anyway.

In the first segment of the show Lindsay, Kelly and I discuss family size. What exactly is a large family anyway? This definition depends on who you are talking to. In the second segment, Mary Ostyn, from the ever popular blog Owlhaven, gives us a glimpse into what it takes to keep a household of 12 running daily. And on top of all that, Mary wrote a book, A Sane Woman's Guide to Raising a Large Family. I will be writing a review and giving away a copy of her book at my blog this week.

In segment three, we hear from two bloggers who tell us what comments they hear about their family size. One has one child, the other two children, you might think they would immune from the comments, but no they get them also.

Once you have watched the show, use this list of links to read more by the bloggers we mention.

Tell Us What You Want To See Next on Backtalk

2009-04-04T13:18:41-05:00

So far we have covered a variety of topics on Backtalk. The ethics of Facebook, how the economy is effecting all of us, mom bloggers who inspire us, blended families... just to name a few.

We have three shows coming up in the next weeks in which we discuss family size, a topic obviously near and dear to my heart, body image post motherhood, and the business of mommy blogging.

Mothergoosemouse twittered that women over 35 should not wear shorts. Ever. Are there different fashion rules for those of us, ahem, who are over that magical line? I bought my first pair of shorts this year after not wearing them for 10 years. And while I agree that most women of all ages do look better not wearing shorts, I decided that turning 40 means I am going to wear what I want. Do not worry I will not be wearing a bikini, midriff baring tops, or short shorts with words across my backside.

Citymama and Bad Kitty are turning forty this year. (Me too! Next month. ACK!) They started a new blog all about the big 4-0. Citymama poses the same fashion question:

So tell me. What are your thoughts on this? What too-young-for-you clothing item or accessories will they have to pry off your cold, dead body? And, who are you wearing?

The one thing that I would add to this is my long hair. I am not cutting my hair off, dammit. I think long hair on a 40 yr old is perfectly fine.

Catherine Connors, Her Bad Mother, wrote a great post this week about bringing moms from all over the world together.

David and I - in partnership with Global Voices Online - are launching an experiment to see if we get a global conversation going between moms who blog. We want to see if it's possible to travel the world and make friends, virtually, solely on the Vernian voyage power of the momosphere. We want to see if we can pull together a global playdate in 80 clicks.

Go join the voyage and visit with moms from around the world.

Jen Lemen wrote a post that once again resonated with me. A post about the meaning of hope.

Hope asks that you notice tiny moments, each one, but not only this. Hope asks that you trust them, that you listen to them, that you take that sneaking suspicion that the Universe is indeed a safe place, a good place even and that you plant it deep into that dark corner of your heart.

These are the posts that have been occupying space in my brain this week. What about you?

We are in the planning stages for our next shows and we want to know what you would like to see featured. What blogs make you think? What topics do you think we should feature? What do you wish people would talk more about?

Backtalk:A Recap

2009-03-27T23:32:06-05:00

This past month we covered the Economy, Divorce, and Education.

How we chose to educate our children. This is a topic about which we all have an opinion. Whether we are homeschooling or sending our children to public or private schools. making the decision is not something any of us take lightly.

The show that elicited the most responses, by far, was about the economy. I am not sure that there are any of us who have not been affected.

Cheeky Lotus has been transparent about the struggle her family has gone through over the past year. And just this past week she wrote this revealing post. The new normal, the one where you are thankful for your job and food on your table.

Portraits of an Economy, a blog that tells the stories of how individuals have been effected by the downturn in the economy.

Interestingly enough, there are now more families in the U.S. that are blended in some way than traditional families. And yet, of all the topics that we have covered to date on Backtalk, this one has had the least amount of responses. From all of you! We have wondered why this is.

Is it because it is too personal? Is it because the topic is too painful for those of you still going through it? Is it because there is a different standard for blogging about step-children and step family relationships? Most of the people that I know personally who are step-parenting, going through a divorce, or sharing custody of their children after a divorce, are choosing not to blog publicly about it.

Here are some more great posts that didn't make it into the show.

Sassafrass

Divorce Saloon

Guest post on Midlife Bloggers

Lisa Stone, blogging about her own blended family at BlogHer.

We'd love to hear your thoughts on being first wives, second wives, and blending families. Maybe tell us your thoughts on why there seem to be so few people blogging on this topic.

Coming Up On Backtalk, and a Call for Submissions

2009-03-20T22:32:39-05:00

Our next Backtalk episode deals with first wives, second wives, parents who blogged through divorce, and those who have blended their families. Some let it all hang out and others are very discrete about what they mention.

We discuss:

Mindy, from the Mommy Blog
Mir, from Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda
Laid-Off Dad
Katie Allison Granju, who blogs about her blended family
Wicked Stepmom, who is anything but wicked

It is a great conversation and I hope you tune in and weigh in on the topic. Do you think that the rules for blogging as a step parent are different from those of the actual parent? Our own Lindsay, stepmother of two teenagers, weighs in with her point of view.

In the meantime, me and my fellow Backtalking moms are working on upcoming episodes and we would love to feature you and your blogs and your ideas. You can upload your videos right here on BlogHer's video page.

Family size! For those of you, like me, with large families, what are some of the stupidest things people have said to you about your family? I could write a book on this topic alone. For those of you with one child, what are the most insensitive remarks people have made about your decision to have "just one?" And why do strangers even care?!?!

Body Image How do you feel about your body now that you have had children? Love it? Hate it? Marvel in the miracle that is the female body? A combination of all of these? And how do we reconcile our own negative thoughts about our bodies with instilling in our daughters a positive body image?

The Business of Mommyblogging Have you used your blog as a stepping stone to a different career? Is mommyblogging a viable career all on its own? I know you all must have lots to say on this topic.

Chris can also be found at Notes from the Trenches

Talk Back to Backtalk

2009-03-06T11:10:47-06:00

The first three episodes of Backtalk have now launched. They are all available for viewing here. It has been so much fun featuring you and seeing many of you for the first time.

The show that really seemed to touch a nerve was the one about Facebook. Boy, did you all have a lot to say.

Cutie Booty Cakes posted a video with her take on the whole facebook friending dilemma.

Hurray for videos!

Blinded by Blonde had this to say:

My son is 18 and in college. I never wanted to be his friend. I want be a Mother that he knows will always love him and trust him to do the right thing because I raised him well, passed no judgment on his friends, and always taught him how to make good decisions. I think its creepy for a parent to want to be a friend of their child on facebook not to mention overly controlling. If you can't give your child space and trust them to act responsibly, than you are going to end up smothering them and they will passive aggressively find a way to release their tension.

I think that children need boundaries. Not an 18 yr old college student, but I wonder if Blinded by Blonde felt the same way when her son was 13 or 14? I also don't think that it is passing judgement to say that other kids are doing stupid things with their facebook accounts. Posting photos in compromising positions or with underage drinking is a stupid thing to do. Wasn't there a Miss America a couple years ago who had Facebook photos of her leaked to the press? A facebook account that she thought was only accessible by her friends.

Sleepy New Mommy echoes my sentiment:

I was a member of Facebook when it was The Facebook (the original name) and it was only open to college students. We used it to post pictures of parties and find people in our classes. When Facebook went public, we were all frantically pulling pictures down, redesigning our sites, and cleaning up our messes so other people in our lives didn't see them. I'm still doing damage control...

I think this is precisely what worries most of with teenagers. They don't seem to realize that once you put things out on the internet that they are there forever. Pictures can be copied off of a facebook account the same way that they can off of any website.

Nordette has an interesting perspective:

My son won't friend me, but my daughter does. However, she's older. I kind of don't want my son, 18, reading my page anyway. He's got just as many ideas about what I shouldn't say or do as I have about what he shouldn't say or do.

Liz, from This Full House leaves a comment about her video:

To be clear, my kids "friending" me on Facebook was one of my stipulations of allowing them to, you know, have a Facebook account. Aaand, they visit and comment on my Facebook, more than I do theirs. Go figure

I wonder if some of the disparity we are seeing in the comments has to do with the age of the kids involved. 18 and out of the house at college is very different from children who are still in middle school. I would hope that my college age kids would feel comfortable enough to have me as a friend, but once they are legal adults there really is nothing I can do to compel them to friend me.

My dear friend Lindsay writes:

There's scientific evidence that the part of the brain that determines consequences doesn't develop fully until we're about 25.

Wow, this explains so much about my college life.

Anyway, what we are looking for now are your ideas. It is a show that we hope reflects all of you.

What would you like to see featured on Backtalk?

Is there anything you see happening in the blogosphere that you think is important for us to talk about?

Let us know in the comments. And if you would like to be featured, let us know that, too!

Chris can also be found blogging at Notes from the Trenches

Coming Up On Backtalk, Call For Submissions

2009-02-21T14:13:40-06:00

We're talking about sex, baby.

In Episode 3, TMI- Too Much Information, we are talking about sex and the mommyblogger. Some of us never write about sex, some of us write about it frequently and with great detail. It is after all what got us into the mommy(blogger) predicament in the first place.

But we wonder... how much is too much to share? What do you feel comfortable putting out there? I share a story that happened recently that I chose not to blog... except whoops, now I have blabbed about it on video.

Some of my favorite moms share the worst pregnancy comments they have ever gotten. You know the ones. The worst comment I had was by the wife of a former boss of my husband. We were at a party and she grabbed me and turned me around and said, "Wow, your ass is SO HUGE you must be having a girl." In front of a room full of people. And then she kept saying versions of that same thing all night long to everyone who walked near me. I told her that if in fact I did have a girl that I would forgive her. Surprisingly, I had a girl, but turns out I am still annoyed!

We are hard at work on upcoming episodes and we’d love to feature you, your blogs, and your video! You can upload your video right here on BlogHer's video page or use any other video sharing service and leave us the link.

Here are a few questions for you to think about…

What do you love about your kid's school? What do you hate? What do you think about the state of our education system right now? We want your rants, your raves, and your no-holds-barred opinions! Do you homeschool? What made you chose that path?

How is the economy affecting your family? Are you or your spouse out of a job? Are you saving in the event that one of you gets laid off down the road? Are you feeling anxiety or powerlessness over what's going on?

For those of you with one child, what are the most insensitive remarks people have made about your decision to have "just one?" On the flip side, for those of you with large families, what are some of the stupidest things people have said to you about your brood? Why does family size matter so much to perfect strangers? (OH BOY, do I have a lot to say about this!)

Leave us a link if you have written recently on any of these topics, or get that webcam working! We are use to reading your words, now we would love to hear them!

Chris can also be found at Notes from the Trenches

Disney World: Hints and Tips for a More Enjoyable Experience

2009-01-15T16:17:25-06:00

Before I begin I feel compelled to mention that you go to Disney World to have fun. Do not let yourself turn into one of those yelling stressed out parents that you see there. Just don't do it. You don't want to be the mother that other park attendees remember when they go home as the quintessential stressed out parent.

These hints and tips are to make your trip more enjoyable. They are in no particular order other than how I thought them up:

I. Press pennies:

This is a cheap and fun souvenir. Look on the park maps to find the penny press machines. My kids enjoyed hunting for these, like treasure hunters! Disney also sells little penny press booklets to keep your pennies in. While I personally didn't buy these on our trip, I think it would have been a good idea as I still find these press pennies laying around the children's rooms. A booklet for them would have kept them all together better and would have been easier to store neatly once we got home.

II. Passports at Epcot:

Epcot prides itself on being educational, though I would call it edutainment. We really enjoyed Epcot, but we are a family of nerds. The passports were a great way for the children to have something to do after we visited the 11 different countries. They also have people in each of the pavilions who will stamp your child's passport.

III. It will rain:

Yes it will. It will rain at least once while you are there. Suddenly the sky will open up and people everywhere will go scrambling for shelter. And you will pay for the overpriced hefty bags, yes, you will.

Go to wal-mart and spend $2.00 for cheapy rain ponchos for you and your children. Also bring a few large hefty lawn and leaf bags. Keep them folded and in your diaper bag. You will want these to cover your stroller, diaper bag, and any other personal items. Wear sandals, like tevas, that can get wet. If you decide to wear sneakers, like I did when I was pregnant and needed good support shoes, bring extra socks or you too will be forced to buy a $10 pair of socks with mickey mouse embroidered on them. Because NOTHING in Disney world is character free or inexpensive.

If being wet will bother your young children, bring a spare set of clothes. There are numerous opportunities to play in fountains. Even just a onesie or sundress which don't take up alot of room. My children who older, say age 5 and up, just have to suck it up and deal with being a little wet. I know. I am mean.

IV. Character meals:

Kids love these and you may find yourself balancing between thriftiness and making memories. Breakfast is the least expensive and the one that children in general are most likely to actually eat. By dinner time the crankiness has set in and they may not be as enthusiastic about meeting the characters.

Do your kids care what characters they see at the meal? Mine didn't really care. We ate at the Cape May Cafe, which has a fabulous breakfast buffet and the characters are dressed in 1920 style beach attire. It was not packed with people, the food was great, the character to guest ratio was high, and all the characters came over to our table.

The added benefit was that we were able to park our car at the resort for the day and walk in from there instead of going to the main parking lot. If you are going to go to a character breakfast make sure it is located near the park you are going to be attending that day. Make your breakfast reservation for before the park opens for the day. The you will be finishing up your breakfast as the park opens and be ready to start your day.

V. Seeing your favorite characters:

One of the things that surprised me was how few characters are actually just wandering around the park. If you want to make sure to see a particular character check the parks daily entertainment schedule, which you will grab on your way into the park. There will be character show times listed and character wranglers who will make you form a line.

Be prepared for obnoxious parents of other children who will push, shove, and think their child is entitled to spend a half hour with the character, while your child stands there. But that is what the wrangler is for and most of the time the issues I saw were resolved quickly and peacefully.

VI. People, they suck:

I know this really isn't a tip per se, but there is a HUGE segment of the population who does not think twice about doing things like standing in front of your child at a parade, being rude to your child and you, or just being loud and obnoxious. There is nothing that annoys me more than people who complain constantly. What did you think, people, that Mickey Mouse himself was going to hold your hand and escort you through the park?

I can think of so many examples of adults who were poorly behaved and how shocked I was at their behavior, and then in turn shocked that I was shocked. But one in particular stands out.

We were waiting in line for ice cream cones and there was a group of 4 adults with no children in front of us. The girl at the counter was having trouble with the ice cream machine and the icecream was too soft and drippy. She handed one of the men his ice cream cone and the icecream began sliding sideways. He went nuts. Threw the ice cream and cone down on the ground while shouting, "Didn't you go to school to learn how to do this?" as well as several other expletive laden things.

Ice cream cone serving school? Seriously? Get a grip. Also, keep your crazy self away from me.

VII.Take a break in the afternoon:

I heard this one so many times, but we never really did. We would find a quiet place in the park to sit. Maybe watch a show in the street or listen to some music and enjoy a Mickey Mouse icecream cone. If you are feeling like you want to sit and rest, check your entertainment schedule and see what is going on that might be relaxing and enjoyable. But we never left the park and came back later. It seemed like a big waste of time.

VIII. Use the Fastpass Wisely:

(Not to be confused with the Photopass)

Here's how it works. You insert your Park entrance ticket into a Fastpass machine at the attraction that has a line. You then receive a designated ride time window to return to the ride., When your time rolls around, come back to the Fastpass entrance and bypass the line completely.

A word of caution about the fastpass. You can only have one on your ticket at a time. Be sure to check the return time on the machine before you put your card in. Otherwise you may end up with a return time 6 hours later in the day and not be able to use the Fastpass option for other attractions for the entire day. There is no way to undo your Fastpass.

Because we travelled off season we only used them once, to go on the Peter Pan ride in the Magic Kingdom. It was well worth it.

IX. Baby swap:

Probably the best thing EVER for families travelling with with a mixed age group where some of the children are too young for a given ride. Really this should be named parent swap. In a nutshell what happens is that you wait on line all together. When you get to the front of the line one parent goes on the ride with children who are big enough while the other parents stands off to the side with the too small children. Once the first parent child team is done on the ride, the parent gets off and the other parent gets on. The children get to ride it twice.

X. Use Priority Seating for restaurant meals.

It is not a reservation There is no commitment on your part. What it means is that when you arrive at the restaurant you will get to jump the line and be seated next. So call ahead and do this if you think there is even a remote possibility that you want to eat somewhere at a given time. If it works out, great. if it doesn't, well that is fine too.

XI. Photo Pass:

How does the Photo Pass work?

There are official Disney photographers all over the park. For every opportunity that there is a photographer take advantage of his/her services. The first time you have a photograph taken you will receive a card from the photographer. From that point on you will hand over your card to every photographer who will scan it. At the end of your trip you go to the designated photo pick up locations where you can view your photographs.

This can be a good deal for some people.

The photos are expensive (VERY expensive) when purchased individually, but there is also a Photo Pass CD option, an unlimited amount of photographs on the CD for $99. And while that does sound like a lot of money, you should keep in mind that you can accumulate 100 photos in a weeks time. And if you are travelling with other relatives or grandparents you can split the price between all of you and have all of you in the photographs if that is what you desire. Then you can go home and print them out in the thousands for all your friends and relatives to admire. Or toss the CD in your drawer to collect dust.

And don't you want to have photos like this to hold on to forever...

it is the happiest place on earth, after all.

Part One of the Disney World series can be found here.
Part Two of the Disney World series can be found here.

When she isn't blogging about her life at Notes from the Trenches, Chris is busy rescuing her house from a century of neglect and bad taste.

Disney World -- Stopping the Gimmees

2009-01-07T00:52:32-06:00

Going to Disney World is expensive. Sure, there are ways to do without spending quite as much money, but it is still an expensive vacation. What can you do to help ease the cost on the things that you actually have control over?

About 6 weeks before our trip to Disney World I presented each of my children with a checkbook register. They had $40 deposited in their "account" as spending money for the trip. It was theirs to spend as they wished, on whatever their little heart desired, no strings attached, other than once it was gone... it was gone. They had 6 weeks to earn extra money doing various chores around the house. Some of them chose to do this more than others.

I was hoping that giving them control over the money would also teach them some accountability and sharpen their math skills. Every time they would buy something they would need to do math to figure out how much money they had spent and how much they had left to spend.

It is important to note, that at Disney World some things are only available in certain locations. So you can not buy the safari hat anywhere but Animal kingdom. And the ship in the bottle anywhere but at the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. So if the kids have their heart set on something, they should buy it when they see it. Unless you feel like spending a day going back to all the places where they saw something they now cannot live without, and in which case you are a way better mother than I am.

Before we left for the trip I bought my children Disney "gifts" which I saved them until we were at Disney World. Then every morning when they woke up there was a present waiting for them next to their breakfast plates. Like a Disney Hanukkah. Sing along: Disney Disney Disney...I got it on ebay.

The Disney store is a good place to buy some presents if you can get the sales or clearanced items. I got my children t-shirts, Mickey Mouse beanie babies, and something else that was obviously such a big hit it has completely slipped my mind.

Children are much less likely to beg for the mickey mouse beanie baby if they already have one. And I was able to buy them for much less money than I would have spent if I waited to buy them things at Disney World. They don't care if it cost $5 and not $25.

The little (and therefore not fashion conscious) kids had tiny fanny packs that they wore. In them they carried some snacks, their money for the penny press machines, their checkbook registers, a business card with their name and our cell phone numbers (just in case someone took them, realized how annoying they were, and decided to give them back), and their mini fans.

Never have children had more fun with mini fans. I bought them so the kids could keep cool waiting in line, but they found many more uses for them. Such as lawn maintenance:

They were worth the dollar it cost me to buy them. And the $20 in batteries to keep them running.

First installment in the Disney World series, Planning Ahead

When she isn't blogging about her life at Notes From the Trenches, Chris is working to rescue her house from a century of neglect and bad taste.

New Year Resolutions, DIY Style

2008-12-31T08:01:53-06:00

This time of yeardoing home renovations is the last thing on my mind. I don't want all my decorations getting dusty. And this is the only time of year that I feel my house looks "finished" or company worthy.

Thinking about home renovations is another story.

Let's look back on the list I posted last year and see how much of it has been done.

1) KITCHEN. Tear out everything that is there and replace it. This is huge. This is exciting. This is messy beyond all levels of messiness and inconvenient beyond all levels of inconvenience. I will want to complain about it every day, but will try to refrain and look on the bright side of not having to cook.

(This was just recently completed. And it is everything I hoped it would be. I love my new kitchen. And, yes, I did complain every single day while the renovation took place.)

2) Finish painting and trim work in the dining room.

(YES!)

3) Finish painting the odd random bits of trim in the foyer.

(YES! Well, except for one small piece of trim that I noticed when I was decorating for Xmas. I'll have to get to it soon. Soon being relative, of course.)

4) Refinish wood floors in foyer and dining room.

(YES!)

5) Landscape the front yard.

(Uh, no. Not one thing did we do to the front yard. We did get estimates, but in the end decided to spend our money on the kicthen renovation.)

6) Rebuild front porch. Why did we buy a house with such a large wrap around front porch? Oh yes, so we could sit out there on our porch swing and sip our mint julips. Maybe when we are 90 we will be have some free time.

(No. Just ran out of time this summer. And money.)

Anyway, that is just the tip of the iceberg. The bigger of the projects that we have in mind. There are lots of smaller ones too like replacing doorknobs in the house (DONE!), hanging new light fixtures (DONE!), cleaning out the gutters (Mostly DONE!). But those are the sort of projects we tend to do on the spur of the moment. The ones that make us feel like me are actually accomplishing something on our weekends. The sort of projects we add to our list after we have done them just so we have the pleasure of crossing them off.

So what are other DIYers resolving to do this year?

In February of last year, The Stevens Family posted their home improvement resolutions for 2007. I am eager to see their post at years end to find out how they did.

Eye on Howard Hall Farm posted their short and sweet list which includes restoring an old beehive oven in their home in time for giving hearth cooking classes. Wow. I just want shiny floors.

Casa Caudill is looking to replace all of the windows in their house. I am weeping tears of happiness for them while I listen to my old wood windows rattle in the breeze. I also like to tell myself that they are original to the house and feel somehow happy about it, but really that is just how us old house renovators like to feel good about bundling up indoors. She also has resolved to pick a color for her kitchen. As someone who struggles with the choosing of paint colors I realize the enormity of this resolution.

Aimee writes her resolutions to spruce up her outdoor living area with a deck. We don't have a deck, instead a screened porch, and I love it. It ranks up there as the best thing we have spent money on. I could probably just sip my mint julips out there and let the front porch fall down.

At the ever famous Houseblogs.Net, Jeanne asks everyone what their resolutions are for 2008. Read the comments and become inspired. Or perhaps strengthen your resolve to never buy an old house.

I hope they all post a recap and let us know if they accomplished what was on their 2008 list. And how many of the projects will be carried over to 2009.

Wishing all of you a Happy New Year.

When she is blogging at Notes From the Trenches, Chris is trying to rescue her house from a century of neglect and bad taste.

Winter Storm Preparation: Are You Ready?

2008-12-19T06:41:02-06:00

Oh it is that time of year, where the winter snow and ice storms threaten to knock out power and close roads. As a storm is bearing down upon us right now, I have this on my mind. What do you do to prepare in advance?

Here is my list. Note that this is by no means an exhaustive list. Think of it as a jumping off place for your own preparations. I mean, you may like beer in place of wine, I don't know.

1) Put your refrigerator and freezer on their coldest settings. This way if you lose power you will buy yourself a little bit of extra time. You know if you do lose power that you should not, under any circumstance open your freezer. Nope, not even to check if it is still cold. Just don't do it. It will stay frozen much longer without you checking.

2) Buy one of those crank emergency radios. While most of the time you really don't need the news when your power is out, it is nice to know that it is there in case of a true emergency. Also, it gives the kids something to do while they ask you repeatedly, "Is the power coming back on soon?"

3) Get some sort of alternative heater AND the fuel to run them. We have two large kerosene heaters. Now these will not heat our entire house, but we can use them to heat a room where we all hang out in while waiting for the heat to come back on. You do want to be extremely careful with these types of heating devices. Never put them on in a room in which you are sleeping.

4)If you have a well, you will want to make sure you have extra water. Fill up the bathtubs for using to flush the toilet. Buy some gallon sized jugs of water for drinking, cooking, brushing your teeth.

5) A small camping stove will be a Godsend. Especially for the morning when you really will need your cup of coffee. So make sure that you get a small camping percolater also. Remember the sort of coffee maker you grandmother used before the invention of the Mr. Coffee?

6) Know where all your flashlights, batteries, candles, AND matches are located. There is nothing worse than fumbling through the dark looking for these things.

7) Have a supply of fun storm things:
Logs for the fireplace
Marshmallows
Wine
Snack food
Sticks to roast them on
Fully charge laptops and/or portable DVD players
Deck of cards
A large puzzle to work on, or new board game to play

8) My personal favorite, know where the closest hotel with a heated indoor swimming pool and free wifi is located. So when you decide that you have had enough the kids will have a place to burn off energy and you will be able to "work."

Disney World on a Family Budget: Planning Ahead

2008-11-25T21:51:55-06:00

Disney World.
The dream of every child and the nightmare of every parent who doesn't enjoy bleeding their hard earned money. Surprisingly Disney can be an affordable vacation. There is not much variation in the price of tickets from place to place on the internet. I do not recommend waiting until you arrive at the gate to purchase them or you will be spending additional money per ticket.

When we went I bought Park Hopper tickets, which meant that we could go from park to park on any given day. There is an additional charge for this and we did not use this option once during our vacation. I am not sure that I would do it again, unless I were going to be doing Disney for a long vacation. As it was we did not see everything in any one of the parks and certainly did not feel like dealing with the hassle of leaving one park and going to a different one.

Also check out the prices of the tickets. The per day goes down the more days you buy tickets for. This means the admission price for 4 days is virtually identical to the admission price for 5 days. (In fact I just purchased tickets for our upcoming Disney trip next month and they had a special running 5 days admission for the price of 3. I think the bad economy is hurting even the Mouse. They are hoping that once you are in the park you will spend lots of money on other things like snacks and photos.)

My first and most important piece of unsolicited yet often given advice: GO OFF SEASON.

Shall I repeat it?

GO OFF SEASON.

Ignore this advice if:

1) You enjoy being inches away from the unwashed masses of humanity while waiting in line for hours on end, while your children beg you to leave Disney and take them back to the hotel to go swimming in the pool, because they do not have pools in your home state, and

2) you also enjoy 105 degree temperatures with 95% humidity which essentially means you will be stewing in your own sweat as well as that of other people who think deodorant is optional.

If that scenario sounds like something you would really enjoy to have played out several times over just as many days, then by all means go during the summer vacation season. Also, get some professional help.

For everyone else, doing Disney off season means there will be less people, less crowds, and little to no waiting in lines. We were able to ride the popular rides numerous times without ever waiting in a line. Getting off the ride and getting right back on it. It was fabulous. Honestly I don't think I could have enjoyed Disney world if I had to wait on line for more than five minutes.

Going off season also means that accommodations will be less expensive. I know many people swear by staying at the Disney run hotels. I, however, am not one of them.

We rented a three bedroom, 2 bathroom condo that had a full kitchen, laundry inside the condo, and a swimming pool. It was also in a gated community, if that is something that matters to you. Being from New England where we don't have anything like this I don't quite get it's appeal, but there ya go. At $120 per night, it was considerably less a night than any of the Disney single hotel room options. (For our upcoming trip this year we found a 6 bedroom private house with a pool to rent. It will cost us $1500 for the entire week and is only a 10 minute drive to the park.)

One of the great things about going this route, is that you don't have to eat out for every meal. As exciting as that seems while you are planning the trip from the comfort of your own home and internet connection, it gets old really quickly, especially when you have cranky, overtired, hot children whose idea of fun is not sitting quietly in a restaurant.

I used the kitchen to it's fullest. As soon as we arrived in Orlando we drove right over to the Super Walmart and went grocery shopping.

As we shopped we kept in mind: 1) what sort of foods did we want to make for breakfast, 2) what kinds if snacks to bring for during the day, and 3) what kind of dinner/late night snack foods for when we arrived home from a long day at the parks.

I also brought my crock pot with me. I know you are thinking that is crazy, enough with the crock pot, lady. But it was worth it to come home and have food that was done cooking.

One morning we went to a character breakfast, the other days we ate at home before leaving. I brought snacks with us to the park every day. I had a largish soft sided cooler which the children put their water bottles in and in there I put things like string cheese, turkey to be rolled up, oranges sliced up in a ziploc bag.

Then I had a small diaper bag type of bag where I put things like granola bars, raisins, little packages of peanuts, cookies, mickey mouse fruit snacks (keeping the Disney theme, you know). The plan we had was to snack all day on these small things, buying a special treat like a Mickey ice cream or something similar and then eating dinner out.

I also brought a small can of gatorade powder to make in the children's water bottles. Do you know that you can still get water for free to refill you water bottles? Yes, you can. It is called a water fountain. And much better than spending $5 for a bottle of water.

Our goal was to prevent us from dropping hundreds of dollars every day on grazing foods and drinks. And it worked. We discovered that if we had enough snacks, combined with the heat and excessive water/gatorade consumption in an effort to stay well hydrated, we really weren't all that hungry.

But how did you carry all that around with you, are you a pack mule? did you bring a sherpa?

Ah, the stroller is your friend. And bring your own stroller if at all possible. Even if you think your child is too old for a stroller, bring it anyway. The Disney ones are not comfortable and you can not take them out of the park to your car in the parking lot. Do you feel like carrying a whining, tired, cranky child out to your car, when you yourself are tired, cranky, and in desperate need of a stiff drink? Yeah, me neither.

We brought our double stroller and our cheapie $20 umbrella stroller. My 5 yr old had initially refused to ride in the baby stroller and how dare we even suggest such a thing since he clearly is NOT a baby, but after the first day he saw the error of his ways, embraced his babyhood, and happily rode in it. And frankly I encouraged it because he walked SO SLOWLY that we might still be wandering around Epcot had he not obliged.

Next up in the series: Disney on a Family Budget: Stopping the Gimmees. Because we have all had the experience of going some where and having a child beg you to buy something at every single store, kiosk, or vendor you happen to pass. I will offer up some advice on how to strike the perfect balance.

Chris went to Disney World with six children when she was pregnant. And surprisngly she had fun. So much fun that 4 years later, she is doing it again. Except for the being pregnant part. That she is most certainly NOT doing again. She can be found blogging about her lifeNotes from the Trenches