Everyone in the BlogHer community enjoys the written method of expression.
You enjoy a good cry when you read a touching a story, you get mad when you hear about injustice, you feel compassion when you read about hard times, and you feel joy when you read about celebration and success.
When you are the writer, you invoke a feeling in yourself that allows the reader to embrace the emotion you are experiencing as you type your way to self-expression.
That being said, since I knew I was going to write about blogging to happiness, I decided to do an experiment with my own happiness as I wrote.
I knew in order to glean the most from my blogging happiness experience, my senses need to be stimulated.
You see, I started the day waking up to jackhammers gyrating the ground of my urban San Francisco home and knew I needed to escape for my own happiness.
I left my home environment to find the peace and happiness in a surrounding area that would enable me to be inspired to write in a happy voice.
I found myself at a local restaurant with a lounge overlooking the Pacific Ocean. Ahhhhh.... Happiness...
My heart has opened and I have reached a point of inspiration. I recommend you find the place that will help you achieve relaxed peace and happiness so you will be able to focus as you prepare to express your written voice.
Next, I was seeking to simulate my sense of taste... the waitress came by and the best thing I could think of was a warm hot cocoa.
This helped stimulate my sense of smell as well... the smell of chocolate always makes me happy!
So now, I have my sight, taste, and smell stimulated and my happiness is growing by the second....
I look to stimulate my senses of hearing and touch next.
I plug in my headphones and play the meditation music that helps me feel the most relaxed and at peace.
Ahhhhhhh, even more happiness.
Touch is next. I picked up my friend on the way to write my blog, knowing she had work to accomplish too. Sharing this moment with someone else takes my happiness to new heights and so I ask her for a hug. Her loving embrace and care help stimulate my happiness even more.
Can you feel my happiness now?
Are you feeling the emotional contagion I am feeling overlooking the vast, pretty ocean, the taste and smell of hot cocoa, the relaxation from meditation music, the embrace of a close friend and the ability to share the experience with someone I love?
Now I am blogging my way to happiness.
This is a turning point.
So far, I have controlled the external environment to the point of my highest level of happiness and this works to some degree, yet now I want to explain how to achieve this from the inside out simply using positive words as my expression.
The trick to blogging your way to happiness is to eliminate negative language altogether. You read correctly.
Eliminate the following words from your vocabulary:
no, not, don’t, can’t, should, but, try
Instead of no, say "I would prefer" or "I would rather." This enables you to say exactly what is on your mind or in your heart. You are stating what is in alignment with what is truly happening for you instead of negating what is "not" happening for you. Play a game with someone you know. Ask them to ask you continuous obvious "no" questions and answer consistently with “I’d rather" or "I’d prefer.” This reinforcement of the positive will help direct your upward spiral* into the place you want to see it go.
Instead of not or any conjunction of not say what you can do. For example, “Stay on the grass” versus “Don’t go on the sidewalk.” This is the same idea as eliminating no. Go ahead and reaffirm what you can do and what you do want.
Instead of should, say “I recommend” or “I need to” Are you tired of everyone saying “You should ....” or are you tired of saying that to yourself? “I should...” never makes anyone feel happy. So empower yourself to use the language “I recommend” for when you want to "should" others and “I need to” when you want to should yourself.
Instead of but, say “yet” or “and.” Everything is great until we hear the word "but," then our heart sinks and our ego goes into, “I knew it was too good to be true!” Yet when you replace "but" with a "yet" or an "and" the transition in our communication becomes easier and more effective.
Eliminate try all together. One of my mentors told me the word "try" is an admission of failure. If you notice any time you or someone you know says the word "try" you can see a lack of follow-through or the intention to give an out. So instead of "trying" to blog your way to happiness, blog your way to happiness.
This may seem impossible, so let me give you an example about blogging to happiness using negative language and positive language and see for yourself which one makes you happier.
There is no way I can eliminate negative language from my vocabulary. I can’t even think of a way to do this. I don’t know if I can do this. I should be able to if Dr. Aymee tells me I can do it. Maybe I will try to do it and see what happens, but I am sure my point will be lost because I have never done this before.
I love writing in positive language. I love the challenge and opportunity for something new in my self-expression. I will be conscious of every word I type and see how I feel. I will be diligent in my self-expression so I can articulate well the truth of my story instead of negating the reality that never happened. I welcome the idea of expressing myself clearly with the simple elimination of negative words.
In summary, in order to blog your way to happiness, first set the stage for your own happiness through stimulating your senses of sight, sound, taste, smell and touch. Second, share your experience with someone you love. You can share your experience in person or by thinking about loved ones you will connect with through your writing. Third, eliminate all negative language in your text.
Blogging your way to happiness is as easy as 1-2-3!
How does blogging, journaling, writing and connecting online help to increase your happiness?
Dr. Aymee Coget, Sustainable Happiness Expert, founder of The Happiness Makeover™ Training Program offers services and products on how to become happier at her website www.happinessmakeover.com. Ask questions and visit her on Facebook or Twitter (@draymee), or her blog www.draymee.blogspot.com.
*Please visit our Life Well Lived Glossary for more information about terms used in this post including "upward spiral."