Birthmother's Day: Separate and Not Equal but Maybe Okay

Tomorrow is Mother's Day. That means today -- the day before Mother's Day -- is Birthmother's Day. Started in 1990 by a group of birthmothers in Seattle, it is a day set aside to honor the love, sacrifice and loss that mothers who relinquish their children for adoption feel and experience. As a birth mother, I should love this day. The truth is that I don't quite know how I feel about this day....more
I'd never heard of Birth Mother's Day. After reading your posts and comments, I feel much like ...more

Memories

8th April 2005 Simon sent another message through Genes Reunited letting me know what his email address is – I’m not surprised though that he didn’t think to write straight to my email address. Let me know he has chatted to Anthony on msn messenger who seems to have left a good impression on Simon which has been a relief. It seems strange talking to Simon about Anthony though as none of my family ever talked about him so am relieved that Simon is so accepting of him....more

Contact with cousins

7th April 2005...more

Family tree

6th April 2005...more

The thoughts that keep you awake at night

 Every now and then, the reality of my situation jumps up and slaps me in the face. Last night was one of those times. I adopted my two children when I was in my mid forties. I didn't feel like I was a middle-aged person. I felt great. The years in front of me seemed endless. I never hesitated about taking on two babies. I had energy to burn, and heck, I would only be in my mid sixties when they reached 21, so that was fine. What never entered my mind, what couldn't enter it because I didn't know, was that first of all, when you hit fifty, things shift....more

Filling in the holes

5th April 2005...more

Dealing with attitudes

4th April 2005 Been a better day today. Helped by having a decent conversation in the chat room yesterday, made me realise how lucky I am compared to others who have greater problems than me. A couple of hours ago one of the church members came round to see us to let us know he wanted to give us his car. Typical I start something and company turns up so will have to come back to this later....more

My World

I will be in the process of getting my journal here in a better order than it is elsewhere so that it makes sense:18th July 2010...more

A Tale of Three Mothers on Mother's Day

My younger daughter was baptized on Pentecost Sunday in 2008. It happened also to be Mother’s Day that Sunday. My mother, my father and my daughters’ godparents all came to town for the big event, as did my baby’s mother. That is to say, her first, natural, birth or biological mother -- the one who carried her six weeks shy of 40, then nearly died before an emergency c-section saved her -- came to town to celebrate the baptism and her own very first Mother’s Day....more

for this acknowledgment of the profound grief present in even an ethical adoption.more

What won’t be happening this year on Mother’s Day….My Childrens Day

I remember as a very young adult, surfacing from my teen years… Finding myself married… and not having a mother figure in my life struggling with the very thought of mother’s day… It depressed me… It angered me (not that everything didn’t anger me at this point)… I remember flashbacks to the cultish church (sometimes which I had been dragged to by my hair) and the Mothers day program and cheesy songs put on by the primary… and the little flowers given to all the mothers in attendance… I remember all the girls in their Easter dresses with fancy hats (It was tradition to wear them again for t...more

FYI- Angel girl did come see me! She is amazing... We exchanged gifts.. I had for her dried ...more