And so it begins...

It's been nine months since the blow-up in my newly-remodled kitchen.  Yes, I was the one who asked for the divorce, but it had been a silent  passenger in my marriage for years.  Okay, at times it was not so silent.  I hung on to that marriage for the all the cliched reasons:  the kids, the years invested (27), the fear of the unknown, the fear that I couldn't make it out there in the big, bad world without him (something he told me on a regular basis), fear of everone finding out what a jerk my husband was and what a sham our marriage had been.  Shocker...any...more

Monday Morning Motivation, Words of Wisdom on my Divorce Blog

We all have scars of some type or another.  We all have a story. I am finding not everyone wants to hear our stories.  Not everyone wants to know the truth even if you have reams of evidence. But that is ok....more

Our Final Anniversary After 18 Years of Marriage

My husband and I celebrated our 18th wedding anniversary at a fancy restaurant. After he ordered an expensive bottle of wine, he reached into his pocket and pulled out his gift to me. It was a handwritten list of treasured memories from our marriage. Memories, he said, that reminded him of how much we belonged together....more
How do you get that far and only then give up?  im not saying its wrong, i just think you ...more

Entangled

I was thinking about this divorce driving to work.I’m entangled.Only way to describe it.Entangled.Finances House Vehicles Insurance Kids on and on and onA large knot of entanglement.  All balled up.  In a mess.  A complete and utter mess....more
KathieyKathiey  It is hard...and he is lying like a dog on all the documents for court.  I lost ...more

Four days together maybe the start of forever?

We had four wonderful days alone together.  My ex husband and I met at a beautiful lake in Arkansas and just were there.  We left our families, our jobs, our separate homes, our old hard feelings at home and just had an amazing weekend.  There were revelations both observed and spoken.  I saw the changes in his capabilities.  He is easily winded much quicker than before with less exertion.  However, I saw how ingenious he is about finding a way to make it work.  He used pulleys to move things he no longer could on his own.  He asked me to get things f...more

My Book Comes Alive: Movie Preview Released Today

I found myself today at yet another surreal moment in my book/movie journey:  Lifetime released the preview for my movie.  The actual movie premiere is taking place this coming Saturday, May 31st. Some friends who have already seen this preview have asked me, "What do you think?  How do you feel?  What's this like for you?"I really can't answer right now.  I'm still digesting... I invite you to imagine the many emotions I had as I watched this.     ...more
Delaine Moore That is interesting and I agree with you that it doesn't make sense to show all of ...more

Androgel, Online Pharmacies, and Divorce

No matter how many warnings he was given, my ex-husband insisted on taking Androgel.  In doing so, he ended up finding himself faced with his biggest fear: being alone. There are a good number of years in age between he and I, and we each saw advantages to that for vastly different reasons.  While his reason was the assumption that he could recapture his (sexual) youth, mine was the assumption that he wanted someone who would not demand a "young man level" performance of sexual acitivity.  We were both wrong. ...more

If It Hurts Too Much to Stay... Leave

If you find yourself lying to everyone that everything is fine, and having to put on a smile, you need to leave.If you find yourself trying to breathe so quietly that the covers don’t move because it will enrage him, you need to leave.If you find yourself nodding in agreement when he says that the hole in the wall is where he slipped, knowing full well that he hit it during a rage, you need to leave.If you find yourself cut off from everyone who really knows you because you cannot look them  in the eye anymore, you need to leave....more
Thanks for sharing.  This is all so true.  It was reading information like yours on various web ...more

90 Days

It’s coming up on 90 days………………….since I filed for divorce.90 days.  3 months.  Winter to almost Summer.Takes 90 days, in this state, to be divorced.  90 days to be SURE you WANT to be divorced.  To think it over, I suppose.Yes, I DO want to be divorced, but it ain’t gonna happen in 90 days.  No way.  No how.  Not in this universe.  Nope.And?  I made a CALENDAR counting DOWN the 90 days.  Sad?  Because, well, it isn’t going to BE 90 days....more

The Truth

Interesting word.  Means about 15 million things....when you really think about it.  It's tricky.Truth as in the god's honest TRUTH. Truth as in full straight on HONESTY. Truth as in your personal driving force.  Your BELIEFS.Truth.Truth can be twisted...you change it to make your 'version' of your truth.  To make it all ok.  To make it all seem like it was a good idea.  To make you feel better....more
Nice to finally meet another lady who doesn't miss being married. I have to wait a year for my ...more