The School Lunchroom: Where Good Manners Come To Die

Dear Mouthy Housewives,Ever since my son was a toddler, my husband and I have worked hard to teach him good table manners. He was doing really well and we were proud of him, but then he started Kindergarten and picked up bad habits from the other kids. The other night we were in a restaurant and he actually stabbed a dinner roll with his fork and blew bubbles with his straw! He says that's how all of his friends do it and won't listen to us. How can I get back my well-mannered boy?...more

When the Sun Peeks Through the Clouds

Did you ever notice that sometimes things just fall into place? One of those times that are so enjoyable that you sort of forget all the nasty?...more

Radioactive Iodine Treatment: How I Got My Super Powers

Melissa takes us through the story of her radioactive iodine treatment to do away with her thyroid cancer once and for all, proving beyond the shadow of a down that humor is one of the best treatments of them all. ...more
I am about to receive my RAI in a week n a half and reading this story made me and my mother ...more

leave me where I am, I am only sleeping

“Hey where did my boys go?” I called out. “We are up here,” Marc answered.  “Alex and I are going to rest a little.”...more

Meth For Christmas

To keep things light, I don’t write about my serious homicide and sex crimes cases where I tend to shine. Instead, you get to hear about my missteps. In order to keep this job, I must be a little smarter than I sometimes appear. I swear.My partner Jim has been gone for several weeks and he took his drug dog Astro with him. I miss them both and blame Jim for the following events....more
Great story and a nice bit of writing! I bet you have a million of them!more

Someday This War Is Going To End.

Today was a day that you'd like to pretend never happened.  Just when you thought you were done with it, that you'd never ever have to see it again, it pops up in your life like an ex boyfriend or an audit.  You're doing fine and then boom, out of nowhere, it's there right there front and center and you just can't avoid it.Today was that day for me....more

This Holiday Season: Never Look a Gift Ho in the Mouth!

Last year, on the twenty-fifth of August, my cousin Francine swished into my house with her Christmas shopping list. The back-to-school stuff had not yet been slashed. The Halloween goodies weren’t even on the shelves, yet there she stood, her credit card aimed and ready to swipe. She informed me that time was a- wasting. It was time to go holiday shopping. “Do you want to go in on the gifts this year or do you want to go by yourself?” she asked. “You know how you get at this time of year.”...more

Can You Hear Me Now?

I'd like to discuss a question that's been plaguing me for some time now, one that's gone from a mild annoyance to, well, an evil menace, and that is:Why do we still have a home phone?...more

Abs Start in the Kitchen

I gave up being very strict on my Atkins diet (20 grams is just not enough), but it is still my ...more

The Human Accordion

I find it remarkable that others maintain their figure responsibly. They inconspicuously stay within five pounds of a normal weight, as if they committed as babies not to disrupt the progressive, natural process of life.  They live steadily at one size all the way through their thirties, slightly plump up around midlife, then shrivel.  Cut to a still of my wardrobe, ranging in size from 4 to 18. I was skinny as a child; a redheaded, gangly arrangement of bones....more