Losing My Religion

I am angry. So this is me. Using this blog as my spotlight. As I’m losing my religion.It started the weekend of the muppets’ baptism. Baptism: the first of the Church’s seven sacraments – meant to signify purity and cleansing from sin as a devotion to God. The welcoming of the new generation into the faith.Can you tell my family’s Catholic?...more
It's hard to watch the ones we love suffer and sometimes it is frustrating when God doesn't ...more

Martin Luther King, Jr.: A Complete Life

 “An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity.” ~Martin Luther King, Jr....more

Is it a loss if I never really had him? Yes, I think so

I don't even know where to begin really. To simply say I had a rough childhood would be an understatement. To go into explicit detail would take too long and expel too much emotional energy. Also, I'm not sure that I can really write it all out yet. I've started. I've sat here for the past two weeks staring at this screen with words brimming over. Words crowding the page, gathering like dirty laundry on my bed and floor, covering the walls, hanging from the ceiling. All of these words which translate into all of these memories. ...more

Living Grief (and Love) During The Holidays

I took the helm of all the elaborate Christmas dinner planning and cooking in 2010, when my mother finally admitted she wasn't able to stand as long as all that festivity required. We opened a bottle of Dom Perignon to toast my parents' 50th wedding anniversary, which they'd celebrated just 9 days before. A landmark, a lifetime together. That was my brother's and my last Christmas with our parents. Sudden and cruel illnesses took them over and took them away in the six months that followed. And so last year my brothers and I faced our final Christmas at their home, before we packed everything our parents had lovingly collected over the years into an armada of boxes and sent them off to be auctioned away to strangers. ...more
Beautiful post, Stacy, and a beautiful tree, too. I think this is part of what Christmas ...more

Fighting Addiction

There comes a point in time when you have to take a step back and just say no. I don’t mean saying no and not giving a second’s consideration as to whether you actually believe in the word and what it is standing for. It’s not like when you hear a sweet and innocent two year old saying it because it’s one of the few words in their fledgling vocabulary. It’s not a fleeting remark to pass the buck to someone else nor should it be said to procrastinate for another day, week or even year. Believe it when you say it. NOOOOOOO!!!...more
This and other posts can be found at www.magslife,commore

Not Just Another F%$##! Statistic

This is taken from my daily blog (http://julialeebarclay.blogspot.com):OK, so now someone I know has died of this disease of alcoholism and in a particularly horrific way.  She was about my age and leaves behind children.  She was in fact probably the age of my friend Vickie who died of breast cancer, and so this is the weird thing: they are both dead, they both leave behind teenage boys, and the similarity ends there....more

isn't it ironic

NaBloPoMo is kicking my boo-tay

I don’t even know what day it is today. I’m way tired, a teensy hungover even though I was far from drinking in excess last night. And even though I am trying to be happy and cheerful, November sucks swamp ass for my family, and we have taken another hit and lost another loved one; a very close friend. I’ve drafted an ode to her, but I can’t even bring myself to finish it, let alone post it today.I’m bringing the focus back on the positive though, because what are you going to do, right?! Here are two highlights from this week....more
Thank you both. I feel so bad for my family, and I am away from them while they are in ...more

Missing My Dad

Tomorrow is the one year anniversary of losing my dad suddenly to a heart attack. I’m dreading going through the day, and yet somehow relieved and more than a little amazed that life does really go on – somehow we’ve all managed to live an entire year of our lives – our annual trips to Yosemite, Lake Siskiyou, the beach house in Aptos, and a year’s worth of birthdays – without him....more


Some days the sadness wins and you just can’t fight it.Some days the questions outweigh the answers.Some days there are more tears than smiles. Some days it would be so much easier to pull the covers way up over your head and stay in bed all day long. Some days holding on to the past is more comfortable than being in the present or looking forward. ...more