When my husband and I were trying for a baby…way back in 2007…it took us two long years to conceive our daughter. Two long years marked by two miscarriages and a lot of heartache.When we got pregnant with DD – and it became apparent that yes, this baby is healthy and will be born – it created a huge shift in my level of happiness.Looking back, I know that in those two years of trying for a baby I was deeply depressed. It’s hard to find happiness when you want something so badly, and yet it remains out of reach....more
What is the Montessori Method?In the 1940’s, Dr. Montessori revealed a scientific method she designed and tested in the belief that it would bring out the highest potential in young children. Previously she developed successful systems for older children, but at this time she stated that her method needed to be introduced to children before the age of 3....more
It takes a village.
I used to wonder what those words really meant. I mean, I live in the suburbs and I don’t even know my neighbors. What kind of village am I supposed to be a part of and how do I join?...more
When you live with toddlers you quickly learn that there are some responses that will end in tears, some that will end in a fight, and some magical phrases that will result in blessed quiet and understanding. These are phrases you have complete control over. Use them nicely, use them as elements outside of yourself or as actionable promises where the children see you as an advocate for their cause, even though you aren't doing anything for them at the moment. Start early with these concepts. Drill them into the children's brains as fact, or at least as routine....more
Other parents are better. They are better than you in all ways. They are better at disciplining their kids, motivating their kids, and keeping their kids out of harm's way. Their children will have more friends in school, lead more fulfilling lives, and never need therapy. Their kids will rule. And it will all be because other parents were much better parents than you can ever hope to be. Sorry. It's a truth I learned too late to save my own kids....more
We've all heard how American kids are spoiled, whiny, co-dependent little zealots who are permitted to survive on boxed mac and cheese while their mothers drift off to Zanax-land because their demanding darlings still won't sleep through the night at age four. Whether or not you agree with this is immaterial. This is how much of the world sees us. We give into our kids food cravings because we are afraid they will starve themselves to death. We permit them to wake as often as they want at night, always rushing in to sooth them at their first call. We spend our lives shuttling them from Gymboree to gymnastics from toddlerhood on, intent on giving them structured play time so they never feel bored. We play with them on demand so they never feel ignored or unloved, and push off our chores until they have finally drifted to dreamland, sacrificing our chance for some leisure time to catch up on laundry. We turn ourselves inside out trying to appease our little major generals. They rule our world. And they know it. The French, simply don't....more
My husband and I heard a talk at the Texas Book Festival a few years ago in which the author, Po Bronson touted the benefits of children seeing the occasional parental argument (stress, occasional) and resolution play out. The gist was that children can tell when there is conflict in the home anyway, and it is best to not hide all disagreements. He spoke about the value in modeling how to respectfully resolve the conflict and how this can help children develop their own, good conflict resolution strategies....more
My eight year old is a sensitive child. He’s not sensitive in the way that many take it to mean: easily hurt, delicate, thin-skinned.This child is sensitive in that his capacity for feeling– for perceiving– is great. It’s a gift.He’s effusive with his love- for me, for his little sister, for all things Star Wars....more
I have a shocking confession to make. I sometimes make judgements on other people’s parenting choices. I know, I know it’s surprising, but it’s true. I can’t help myself, and I know I am not alone.