Brilliance of Color

What is it about trees that turn brilliant yellow, red or orange that never fails to take my breath away? Neighborhood streets are lined with these glorious sentinels and the hillsides are peppered with them. Even the local cemetery where I often walk is resplendent with trees gone riotous with color –perhaps signaling a fête, an elaborate outdoor festival, this time celebrating death as simply one of life’s journeys....more

It Doesn't Have To Be That Way

Procrastination is a combination of low energy and low focus.   Increase your focus by relating the d...more

The Way We Live

We live in the way in which we were born.  The experiences that we encounter while inutero have huge impacts concerning the ways in which we will live out our lives.  Imprints are created early on in our existence that will set the stage for our experiences in life.  As a prenate, our defense system is quite primitive and we are unable to defend ourselves from all that we experience inutero, as we manuever very difficult developmental agendas.  Core wounds occur during the time of our inutero experience and during the days around our birth.  These core wounds are ch...more

Jules Steffen, LMHC


Part 2

Sooo....where to begin?  I'm currently feeling a bit boxed in.  That's the only way I can describe it.   I start school in January for a profession that I swore when I was younger I would never enter.  No...not exotic dancing....more

Making Long Distance Last

In my experience with long distance it is without a doubt difficult at times. I mean, sometimes a girl just wants a warm body to sleep next to… but they also create a sexy anticipation and savory reunions!...more

Slow Down and Enjoy Some Small(er) Talk on Dates

When you’re dating, do you want to know as much as possible about a man, as quickly as possible? Especially for those of us “of a certain age;” life is too damn short to be dilly dallying around. Either the guy is for you, or he’s not. And with the right information, you (think you) can tell darn quickly. You can figure people out quite quickly, right?...more

The #1 Killer of Good Dates and Relationships

“What’s the biggest challenge women face when dating?” This is the question I get asked most often as a dating and relationship coach for women over 40.   And the interesting thing is that it’s mostly asked by men. I usually respond by asking them what they think is our biggest challenge. Almost every man responds with “self-confidence”...more

Working with my clients, ground zero is almost always learning to love and appreciate themselves ...more

Dear Dr. Romance: What behavior does a control freak have?

 Dear Dr. Romance:...more

Dear Dr. Romance: I have been hit, controlled and manuipulated (by husband and in-laws)

Dear Dr. Romance: I am writing to you for some advice... I hope you can help....more


I’m sitting at my desk at work and I feel trapped. Trapped—not because I don’t love my job and enjoy coming here, but trapped because I am unable to do exactly what I want to do right now! Right now I want to tell all men exactly what is on my mind. Right now I want to tell the guy on my football team that I think he’s cute and we should go out sometime. Right now I want to tell the guy I’m going to be going out with in a couple days that I don’t want to go out because you don’t meet my height requirement....more