Now what do I do after the abuse?

 Now what do I do? ...more

Stop Blaming Mother

A mother is a terrible thing to waste. To all adult children who point to their mother as the focal point of their life’s misfortunes, it's really time to grow up.Millions of adult children, some of them already grandparents themselves, still spend time and money on the therapist's couch, ruminating about everything their mother did or didn’t do, does or doesn’t do. These adults don’t see themselves as the imperfect human their own mother is....more

We Are People, Not Paychecks

As someone who has battled severe clinical depression for a number of years, I have visited many mental health professionals.  Lately it dawned on me that only one of those professionals treated me with genuine respect and compassion.  I believe that most qualified therapists are truly caring individuals who want the best for their clients.  However, there are just as many that are unethical and insensitive in their approach.  In some cases, it is clear that they are only in it for the financial gain, not because there is a true desire to help others. ...more

Are You a Hugger?

I am. I can't even imagine saying hi or good-bye to my best friend without giving her a hug. But there certainly have been times in my life where it has become painfully obvious that not everyone is....more

Mother's Little Helper

Anxiety and depression medication is for the crazy, the unbalanced, the weak.  I mean, there are songs about it, for God's sake.  Take Mother's Little Helper by the Rolling Stones, for example.  They some batty broads in that song.  And everyone knows, if it's in a song, it's true.That's what I always thought, anyway. ...more

the damage a bad therapist can do

A perfect and telling story of how concrete thinking works is currently taking place in our home when the therapists visit. We had a negative experience with a therapist several months back, I think I touched on it during one of my posts. Said therapist knew nothing of FAS and insisted on using the technique she used on her other clients. That involved playing (literally) with my son for the first couple of months during their sessions. When I say "play," I mean she would actually play on the trampoline, play catch, whatever with him in the guise of building a relationship....more

Precarious Living

Don't We All Need Therapy?

I know that a lot of parents joke about inevitably forcing their children into therapy as adults—trying to cope with the psychological damage we inflict on them when they are young....more

the "instant friend" syndrome

I read something on another list that jogged a memory for me. In line with the concrete thinking that goes with Fetal Alcohol damage is the instant process of "friend-making." Because a child with this sort of damage takes things very literally, if a total stranger says to them, I am your friend, they immediately say, okay. There is no thought or judgment involved as their ability to reason out decisions has been permanantly damaged. They believe anything anyone says to them as law. They have no ability to do anything else. This proved very damaging to a therapist we once had....more

Down Deep