It was an affair that started online, one of those flirtatious friendships between people who live far away and are very different that turned into a level of honest communication in can be hard to have in everyday life, in real time.

I was raised in a traditional household by a stay-at-home mom and a dad who expected his dinner on the table when he got home from work. There are, of course, many often-discussed pluses and minuses to "love, honor, and obey," and a boatload of passionate opinion to go with them, but much like Christina in Woody Allen's Vicky Cristina Barcelona, the thing I was most certain of growing up was what I didn't want. I didn't want a traditional relationship like my parents'.

Did you know that men date women better looking than them, but never a woman who is less attractive than them? Did you know that this is the natural order of the universe? No? Neither did I. I guess I missed the memo.

In July, A & I will have been dating for two years. This is pretty much the longest relationship since my marriage ended. I love this man, and I am happy, but I worry that for me, being coupled has a time stamp.My friend L is one of those women who’s got a new beau, almost like clockwork, every two years.  Whether they’re dating, living together, or even engaged, L somehow seems to start looking elsewhere around the two-year line.  

Going through the last month of post in the BlogHer Sex & Relationships blogs, I found ten that I really liked. I simply can't choose, and I don't have a theme, so I'm going to try to pair them together. Let's start sexy! I'll call the first pair of posts "OUT & IN." Raerity lets it flow By the Law of Attraction:

Before last night, I had watched Jon & Kate Plus 8 once, and vowed to never watch it again. And except for following the most basic of information in Tweet exchanges with my friend Jodi, I did not.  Until last night. Right.

We're going to Portland tomorrow. Just for fun. And it's our first trip together. At first I was nervous, but now I find myself more just incredibly curious to see how it goes. Of course, plenty of time to get nervous again, right? Just now I thought, OMG it's 4+ days together like all the time. You know how modern life is. We do the sleepover thing, but I still go a few days without seeing him. Even weekends we have breaks. Wow, I'm totally looking forward to having him to myself for days and days in a row.

Yes, you heard right. There is a new show on We-TV that has many women (including myself) up in arms - It's called I Want To Save Your Life. But what could be so bad about a show that wants to save lives? Well, it gives the impression it is a kind of "intervention" type show...but it's really an attack on women who are overweight.

My husband is seven months younger than I am. We were fairly young (for New Yorkers, anyway) when we got married, but the seven month age difference and when the wedding fell on the calendar meant that he was only 23 when we tied the knot, and I was half-way to being 25. "I robbed the cradle!" I liked to exclaim, although the funny thing is that he looks older than he is and I look younger than I am (or at least I used to, anyway). This was years before it was cool for women to partner with younger men. Yeah, I'm so ahead of the fads...

This month I was struck by how many of the great posts in the Sex & Relationships BlogHer Blogs start with questions. Questions about love, sacrifice, and a "pet" topic of mine: pubic hair. BlogHer Scarlettequille asks: Is there a secret mission to eradicate all body hair? Ah Yes, it's that terrifying moment of singlehood where you begin to suspect that all other single woman are ripping it off:

A new national law in non-Taliban Afghanistan now says that unless a wife is ill, she is "obliged to fulfill the sexual desires of her husband." That is the law of the land, signed by President Hamid Karzai.

“Do you think it's this intense because of the sneaking around?” she asked him. “We're not sneaking around now are we?” he asked, caressing her cheek before leaning in for a kiss. She still knew what marriage meant. She still believed in its value. She still wanted it for herself. But suddenly, none of that really made any difference.