Adoption

 
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The Day Motherhood Brought Me to My Darkest Moment

5/16/12 8:59am by Rebecca Hawkes
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post adoption depression

But call it what you will. It brought me to what was perhaps my darkest moment, a moment in which I understood every mother who has done the unthinkable, abandoning through one means or another her sacred role as loving protector and caregiver. I didn't want to be a mom anymore. I couldn't find love and affection in my heart. I only felt fear and a desperate grasping for survival. I wanted to run away, to save myself -- and yet at the same time that very idea was abhorrent to me. So there I stayed, in bed; my adrenaline was pulsing and yet I couldn't move.  Read more >

Coming Soon from TLC: "Birth Moms." Yes, Really.

5/15/12 1:41pm by Morgan Shanahan
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Image courtesy of TLC

[Editor's Note: Reality shows often feel like they take the Field of Dreams approach to all areas of human trauma: If you film it, they will watch. And watch we do.  Read more

A Mother-Daughter Blog's Blue Ribbon Cheesecake

5/13/12 8:00am by Donna & Anne
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Blue Ribbon Cheesecake

[Editor's Note: I've been saving this post since last Mother's Day, when I spotted it and thought it was a wonderful story about mother-daughter relationships, blogging, AND food. Not only is this cheesecake recipe fantastic, but you're going to love the story of how Apron Strings got its start. It's a terrific way to start off this day that honors the mothers we know and love. --Genie]  Read more

Loving Kids Like They Need to Be Loved

4/26/12 1:00pm by Owlhaven
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loving kids

If you've never thought what it's like to parent a teenager who was adopted and the ins and outs that go with that special circumstance, I invite you to read this post by Mary at Owlhaven. What seems like an innocent shopping trip holds a weight for this mom. Her point -- that sometimes we need to love our children how they need to be loved more than we want to love them -- is one that hits me right where I need hit.  Read more

Unexpected Racism Against Transracial Families

4/23/12 11:21am by Jamie
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black and white kids' feet

[Editor's Note: Snide comments and disapproving looks are things mixed-race families will run into sooner or later. But when Jamie from I'm Not the Babysitter adopted her black son, she anticipated disapproval from other Caucasian people. Not the case. It turns out, the stares and comments come from people of all races. And she writes that it's the disapproval of black people that gets to her the most. --Grace]  Read more

The GOP War on Women's Subtext: A Return to the Baby Scoop Era

3/19/12 10:00am by Shannon LC Cate
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no birth control

But the subtext of this “debate” that jumps out for me is adoption. After all, people have been having sex -- shame or no shame, birth control or no birth control, ever since God said, (in renaissance English) “be fruitful, and multiply.” They’ll go on having sex, whether women can enjoy it safely or not, and when they do, sometimes, unplanned babies will be born. And in a world where single parenting (read “single mothering”) is being pathologized by law as leading to child abuse, those unplanned babies will have to go somewhere.  Read more >

Hello and Goodbye: The Bittersweet Enormity of Adoption

3/15/12 6:35am by jennifer.watson
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author's photo

"How are you?" I ask K. "I'm OK," she says looking at me and then back at the TV. "I'm OK." Again, I wonder if she is trying to convince me or herself that she truly is OK. "Are you sure?" She nods her head. I try one last time. One last time I'll say it and then there's no going back for either of us. "There's still time to change your mind," I say. The statement...a question really...hangs in the air between us for a minute before K says, "No. I'm OK. I'm OK."  Read more >

I Hope You're Happy Now

2/28/12 11:59am by amikomatsu
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happy faces

I've been thinking a lot since my debut post about adoption. My brother and I talked about it (he actually divulged he has now lost that once irresistible desire to meet our birthmother and his birthfather), both wondering about people who thought adoption meant your parents didn't want you. What these sort of people don't seem to understand is that it's a very difficult decision.  Read more >

What to Say to a Trans-Racial Adoptive Family

2/23/12 7:46am by Scooping It Up
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white and black children, www.scoopingitup.blogspot.com

Here's the kicker folks: there is rarely such thing as an obviously adoptive family. One of my friends is in a bi-racial marriage and her kids favor her non-Caucasian husband, and she gets questions about "where they come from" often. I don't know how she responds but I know I would want to say, "My children come from my uterus," or if I were feeling snippy, "My husband impregnated me."  Read more >

Racism in Adoption: Charging Different Fees for Different Races Is Not Okay

2/8/12 11:00am by Pocket Full of Prose
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baby feet

Adoption agencies charging different prices for different races is a hot button issue for me. However, sometimes my voice falls on deaf ears. That's why I love that Lara at Pocket Full of Prose shared her thoughts on the matter too. The more that we talk about this from all sides of the adoption triad the more that people -- and these unethical agencies -- will understand that this is simply not okay.  Read more