How to Get Back into The Dating World

Whether it’s been five years or twenty-five years, re-entering the dating world after a divorce can be a really scary proposition.  I’ll grant you, it’s more daunting to some than others, and it depends largely on many external factors; age, self-esteem, how long you’ve been divorced and how long you were married.  When I got a divorce, my posse of friends was all too forthcoming with well meaning advice.  I heard everything from, “Go out there and get busy!” to “Take time to heal and nurture yourself.” and my ever favorite, “You’re not getting any younger.”.  What’s the...more

5 Things I Want My Tween Daughter to Know About Dating

My 12-year-old daughter said the "B" word. No, not that one. The other one that has the same effect of stopping you in your tracks: Boyfriend. She would like permission to start dating. [Insert heavy sigh here.]OK, at this age, it's completely expected. Although I am not ready for this phase to happen just yet, I do accept that it is a normal part of a tween's young life....more

Hey! I’m Too Old for You, and You’ re Too Young for Me!!

I spent the last year thinking those words. But now I’m like Hey! What’s up with this double standard?? Why am I labeled a “cougar”,  while men who date younger women get pats on the back and told to make sure they get a script for Viagra.  But who says the world is fair right?...more

I Wonder Wednesday: Where Does That Sizzle Go?

So you’re in a relationship, everything is great, you love to get those just because phone calls, that hey you text, or spending that quality time together. You love this person’s dirty draws....more

Things to Think About And Do Before Getting Married

Recently an old friend asked me what were some things she should think about and do before getting married.  She thinks her long-term boyfriend is preparing to ask THE question. Her biggest fear is not a lack of trust or love - it is a lack of positive relationship role models in her life. She comes from a family that has a history of divorces, settling, adulterous relationships and just plain unhappy couples....more

Who Are You Really?

This is a concept that I go over often because I am not interested in high-class fashion, fancy cars, or high-priced meals to entice women. All of these things are nice, but my game includes none of them.Who are you if you have nothing? If in a day someone takes your car, your money, your clothes, or anything that you own, who are you really? Do your things define you? Do you need them to succeed?The man who buys a BMW as a status symbol, to show everyone who he is becomes lost once you take that car from him. He had put so much into that car. That car defined him....more

It’s No Big Fucking Deal Ok? I Swear.

 When I began Lucy many moons and first dates ago, it quickly became evident how so many of the situations, emotions and MEN I was writing about were universally accessible or known qualities. But probably not a lot of you get messages like:“The cursing older mature woman.. I love it.. hahha.. How did you spend your fuc**ing weekend? Haha”or some witty variation thereof on a regular basis like I do because well, I’m me. #sigh...more

older men

you know that song "about us by neverest" well i'm really tired of hearing it about us. I didn't mean to fall in love, I told my self I couldn't let it happen, cuz I knew id hear it, I hear it from friends and  hear it from family. "hes to old for you" hes not good enough for you" "your messing up your life" ............ but its my life! people know him by what they hear, they don't see the side I do , they don't hear how much he complements me, how much he does for me and the respect he has for woman is unbelievable, he stands up for me, he supports me and my dictions....more

54 Things You Do When You Really Like And Care About Someone

1. Talk to them2. Make time for them3. Call4. Answer calls5. Be on time6. Make breakfast for them7. Enjoy watching them doing something they love and be reminded why you even liked them in the first place8. Be honest9. Be your best self10. Laugh at their jokes...more

Why Couples Fall out of Love

In my counseling office, I frequently deal with people who’ve heard the dread phrase, “I love you, but I’m not in love with you.” How can it happen that a couple who were once thrilled with each other can fall out of love? It seems like a mystery, but it’s not. And, it’s frequently fixable. Couples fall out of love for three main reasons: • They don’t understand the difference between infatuation and love, • They aren’t don’t understand how to grow their love for each other, and/or...more