What Was Really Happening With Those Azaleas

Six or seven months ago as I walked to my office one morning, I saw a man from the grounds crew chopping up azalea plants by the sidewalk. My first reaction was horror—those plants were perfectly healthy. While I stood there on the sidewalk with my mouth hanging open, the man turned to me and shrugged. He spread his arms out wide over the wreckage then shook his head with resigned disgust. ...more
TheBlackTortoise Thank you. I hope you see jewels everywhere you look.more

I Just Ended a 7-Year Relationship: I Walked Away from My Doctorate

I began to ask myself the question: What would it take for me to love myself, right now, as I am, even if I didn’t achieve a doctoral degree?...more
PaulineJennett Thank you very much for taking time to read and comment...and for recognizing ...more

Climbing Out of Grief: Terminal Illness Means Losing Him Twice

The first thing I lost was an emaciated dying man. ...more
Peace to you also.  I lost my husband of 47 years in 2007 and sometimes I think I am losing my ...more

Success as an Escalator

I was speaking with a young man today who wanted to tell me his story. He said that if I had 15 minutes, he would bring me to tears. I had had a previous interaction with this fellow and was bewildered and dismayed at his youthful arrogance. He is still unaware that we all have our mountains to climb.It isn’t that I’m cold hearted or can’t bear to hear another person’s woes. The nature of my life work (as I see it) is to empower not to coddle. There will always be someone in your life who will support you to be mediocre for reasons of their own. ...more

35 Days With My Baby: The Greatest Gift I've Ever Had

I thought yesterday was the worst day of my life. I was wrong, and apparently I may be wrong again. There is absolutely no way to prepare oneself for the news that your 35-day-old baby may not survive. I have loved this little baby so deeply for 35 days, and I simply cannot fathom how I will go on in the fateful case that my baby does not survive. Credit: ljshoup. ...more
Thanks my love. XXOO.more

The birth of advocacy

It happened again.I got a dreaded phone call from a girlfriend who lost her full term baby, abruptly, unexpectedly- in the dangerous passage from warm comfortable uterus to the sharp, cold air of the birth room. As always, I cried. I cursed the world. I stopped breathing for a minute, the pain impenetrable, then exhaled, anguished. My heart races and I hold my hand over my mouth, "No, no." The unthinkable has happened....more

A Year Ago Today, My Life Changed Forever

It's still so surreal. It feels like just yesterday that my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. It was so quick, so aggressive, so painful, so hard to watch. I have never experienced anything like it, and I hope to never have to again. ...more

Life After Child Loss: Four Months Later

This weekend, I went to the wedding of our friends. It was a beautiful wedding, full of life and laughter and love.But something struck me as I watched Lisa’s mom be escorted to her seat at the front of the church. Followed by Lisa, in her beautiful gown, her dad by her side.I’ll never see this for her. My little girl won’t get a wedding. We’ll never have a chance to talk about dresses, or flowers, or guest lists. Hell, I won’t even know if that’s what she wanted – the big hoopla wedding....more

When the children are watching

Ever think about the things your child may say or do, or even the personality they develop over time. How much of that do you attribute to genes? How much of that do you attribute to learned behavior or learned response? When people say, “you got it honest,” in reference to someone’s attitude or temper etc., I consider they are attributing the characteristics you are displaying, to your surrounding or experience in seeing that as a way to respond. ...more

Truly Understanding a Family's Pain

Truly Understanind a Family's PainDrink today, and drown all sorrow; You shall perhaps not do it tomorrow; Best, while you have it, use your breath; There is no drinking after death.  ~Ben Jonson...more

To Speak or Not to Speak - How to Comfort a Grieving Mom

What do you say to a mother, your best friend, who’s 4 year old was just diagnosed with Leukemia? What do you do when you live several states away from her? How do I comfort this grieving mom?...more

"Mommy, A Plane Just Flew Into a Building!"

Fisher-Price Rescue heroes always save th...more

Remembering 9/11

Good morning all!13 years ago today, I was sitting in my 1st grade classroom probably coloring something or pondering on the childhood worries of life, like: “what will I eat for lunch today?”At around 9 AM, the school’s intercom system went on. It was our principal, and she sounded distressed. “Ladies and gentleman, I’ve just been informed that the World Trade Center in New York City has collapsed, killing hundreds of people. I ask that you all remain silent and teachers, please gather your students together immediately.” ...more