BlogHer of the Week: Mom-101

I spend way more hours every day thinking about the topics we're discussing here than I should be.  On my blog Table for Five, I've made a decision to review DVDs because we watch a lot of them and have definite opinions about what we do and don't like. And yes, I do get some DVDs sent to me from a PR firm and when I review one of those, I say that. I also do a very limited number of giveaways if it's a product and company I already support, like Lands End or LeapFrog. For every review I post there, I have turned down probably 10 more because I don't think anyone cares what I think of the newest hand soap.

On my review blog, which I started because I had BlogHer Ads on Table for Five and so couldn't review products there, I am equally choosy although I do say yes to more requests. However, I find that for every three to five products I'm sent, I'm only thrilled enough with maybe one of them to feel it's worth a review. 

It horrifies me as well to think of Jane Blogger emailing every company she can find contact info for and asking them to send her stuff. I've talked to enough PR people to know that they aren't having any problems finding bloggers to contact.  However, I do think it's different when it's someone who has built up a relationship with a person at a company, like me and Janis at Jakks Pacific, so that I do feel comfortable emailing her and letting her know I have room in my editorial calendar if she's got something she'd like to get my opinion on.  Not because I want her free stuff but because I look at it as a service to my readers.

I know there are studies out there that show what percentage of surveyed women look for reviews of a product online before making a purchase. They can look up reviews on Amazon written by who knows who, or they can read a review on my blog, many of my readers have met me in person and they know what I stand for and what my ethics are.

Criminy, I could go on forever!  Can you tell how passionate I feel about this topic? I absolutely think there is room in our community for blogs focused on product reviews, if they are done well. I hope MomReviews falls into that category :)

Elizabeth blogs at:

Table for Five ( http://table4five.net )
MomReviews ( http://momreviews.net )
MomCooks ( http://momcooks.net )
( http://getmyblogon.com )

 Everyone has to figure out her own way. Basically here's my take, and no doubt there are other thoughts that are also valid. 

1. Most importantly, figure out what your brand is! Mighty Goods (like Cool Mom Picks) for example is a product review blog with a certain sensibiity. So she seeks out stuff she likes, whether she gets a sample or not.

2. If your brand is not a review site, then what makes it relevant for you (and by you I mean anyone) to review a product in the first place? Is that why your readers come? If not, will it seem like you are writing a review simply to get a product or appease a PR person?

Whatever you decide, I think any content, reviews or otherwise, should be relevant to the narrative of your blog (see #1). If you are a writer it makes sense to talk about books you're reading. If you're a soccer mom it makes sense to rave about some new kneepads you found. If you're a design junkie, it makes sense to talk about six cool new artists you saw at a craft fair--maybe even one who sent you a pair of great earrings for review.

I guess this is why I really can't imagine for the life of me why any personal blogger writes "reviews" of random packaged goods and household products. Are there people out there dying to read toilet paper reviews? Eh...maybe. 

3. I see a difference between you asking "got anything you'd like to have reviewed" and "I am doing a story on cupcake oriented products for girls - what is Jakks making this season and I'll consider it."

4. As for the horrified PR people - when Jane S of Mommie of 8 Boyz
sits down at her kitchen table and types email after email asking for
products "to review" for her blog which "gets almost 300 hits a month!" it's clear she just wants free stuff. Can't blame her entirely, but it makes us all look bad.

5. Review disclosure. Hm. The hard one.

This is where others might disagree but I think that a site with narrow and stringent guidelines for what they recommend--and I don't mean "products I like"--have their integrity questioned less and so no one thinks to ask for their disclosure policy. 

I just think, legal issues aside, it's in a blogger's best interest to make sure that her readers feel comfortable with her integrity and that generally means disclosure. Advertorial disguised as editorial is a huge turn-off to readers.

If you haven't already set up a kind of site - like Inhabitots - where your recos and reviews are beyond reproach, then isn't it in your best interest to create trust with your audience through disclosure?

Mom-101 ( http://mom-101.blogspot.com )
( http://coolmompicks.com )

Cool Mom Picks.com ( http://coolmompicks.com )

PS As for the diaper bag thing, really - haven't we all used enough diaper bags to know what makes a good one? Look at it, feel it, open and close it, kick the proverbial tires, then make a recommendation. If it's a dish soap or a mascara, a bag of chips, or yeah, toilet paper - then by all means, use it first!

Congratulations Liz! Your post was so well written and thought-provoking. I just feel like there's no way to make everyone happy on this topic. You say "no, you don't need to own a diaper bag to know whether you can recommend it". And yet, there are others who say how can you write a "review" of something you haven't personally used?

I get dozens of pitches a day, most of which say "Hi there, I represent XYZ and we'd love you to tell your readers about our new blahblahblah."  Now, if I were to publish a post telling my readers why I think they should buy blahblahblah, just because a PR firm asked me to, the PR firm just got free advertising from me and I've sold myself out. Right?

You say PR people are horrified at the number of requests they get for "free stuff"? But on Mighty Goods, there's a "Submit a Product" link where it gives the address to send product submissions to, including a statement that there's no guarantee that the product will actually be reviewed on the site. How is that any different from me emailing my contact at Jakks Pacific and saying "hey Janis, what's new from Jakks for summer? Got anything specific you'd like to have reviewed?"

And why do each of my posts have to clearly spell out my "relationship" to the maker of the product, if Mighty Goods and Design Mom and Inhabitots don't have to? I don't see anything on any posts on those sites that say "we were sent product X to review and here's what we think". Do you see my frustration at trying to figure out the "rules" and to whom they apply?

Elizabeth blogs at:

Table for Five ( http://table4five.net )
MomReviews ( http://momreviews.net )
MomCooks ( http://momcooks.net )
( http://getmyblogon.com )

for the kind words about Cool Mom Picks! We work really hard to maintain objectivity and integrity and I always get a little thrill when it's recognized.

We do get some products for review - most of which we give away to readers - but we also frequent trade shows, go on showroom visits, and attend press events  to keep up to speed on what's cool and what our readers will like to know about. Basically, we're more modeled after magazines. There are certainly plenty of folks (sponsors even) who have offered us everything from strollers and diaper bags to concert tickets and hotel stays, that we've turned down because it's off brand for us. 

That said, I can only imagine that "review/giveaway blogs" offer a benefit for their audience or they wouldn't exist. But like you, I like bloggers with strong points of view, like Design Mom ( http://mightygoods.com ), Inhabitots ( http://inhabitots.com ), Daddy Types ( http://daddytypes.com ) and Mighty Goods ( http://mightygoods.com ). It wouldn't matter to me for one second if they received a product at all because it's so clear that their POV goes beyond "here's something I got from a marketer today and now I'm going to tell you if I like it."

I just get frustrated when bloggers either make insane demands of marketers (no, you don't need to own a diaper bag to know whether you can recommend it), or conversely, give away the farm for a roll of toilet paper--both of which do in fact change the game for us trying to do what we do with integrity.

Good luck with your blog award!

Mom-101 ( http://mom-101.blogspot.com )
( http://coolmompicks.com )

Cool Mom Picks.com ( http://coolmompicks.com )

Thanks for your post, Mom-101. Love your blog, have been a reader for awhile. 

In my day job as the Director of Ethics for a medical non-profit, I deal with this issue every day, just in a different sphere. There is science behind this--the Science of Reciprocity (to steal the phrase from a report on the topic) is proven. Even a free ballpoint pen creates a feeling of obligation in the recipient, so that the recipient (be it a doctor choosing which device to implant, or a parenting blogger choosing to write a post on the new Huggies diaper)is unwittingly being steered towards a favorable view of the entity that gave them the gift/swag/freebie, EVEN IF THEY THINK THEY CAN REMAIN OBJECTIVE. In one survey, 90% of doctors thought that OTHER doctors were susceptible to such marketing tactics (allowing it to unconsciously influence their prescribing decisions) but 90% ALSO said that they themselves were ABOVE such things. Clearly there's a disconnect here. 

When I started blogging, I did a lot of "research" in looking at other popular blogs to see what they did right to determine a sort of "best practices" template for myself. After being blogher of the week here, I got some attention and some more readers and got nominated for the BlogLuxe award for Guilty Pleasure blog. In looking at some of the other nominees, I was highly entertained by some and APPALLED by others that seemed to be nothing more than a list of giveaways, contests, and recommendations for products. Some of these blogs are nothing more than giant pop-up as and I can't imagein why most people would ever frequent them. There is no humanity, no character to those kinds of blogs, and most of us probably steer clear of those.

Where it gets muddy are the sites that really do have educational or humorous or inspiring content, but which also occasionally have a giveaway or a random product recommendation, without disclosing the nature of the relationship with the  manufacturer of the product.  This is where the line is blurred. A reader feels like the blogger is a friend, recommending a product with no bias. I personally would want to know if my "friend" got $10 to tell me to try those wipes, when in fact they are not the ones she prefers. 

I do like sites like Cool Mom Picks because they are up front about what they ar--they review products--and I assume they get freebies of those products and DO NOT RECOMMEND all of what they receive. On my blog I recommend things occasionally but do not receive compensation, and have a disclosure policy reflecting that, on its own page. I also reiterate when I make a recommendation (which is rare anyway)that I have no affiliation with the company. It's the only way I feel readers can trust my opinions. If I had a friend with a company that made something, I would certainly tell my readers it is my friend's company that I'm recomending so they can judge for themselves the extent of my bias and then decide whether to trust the recommendation. The essence of conflict of interest is to make sure that thelearner/audience has all the information they need to make an informed decision about the validity or the statements being proferred. Sites that hide that knowledge from their readers are doing all of us a disservice. 

Laura

momtrolfreak.com

And here I get PR companies asking me to talk about how a product is greening the earth or how babies are so much better off with their latest and greatest ass wipe. Where are my trips? Hell, I'd rake a razor!

 Not really. My problem is I'm not a good liar. Well, I am but I choose not to be. So if your product sucks, that's your fault for sending it to me. 

 Love reading the comments. I'm learning a lot from the ten minutes I've been a member on BlogHer.

 Jackie

TheSilverWhining.com ( http://thesilverwhining.com )

That is all.

Wanted to say thanks for writing such a great comment on this (apparently) hot topic.

Many, many great thought provoking points.

Peace back atcha...

I thought I was coming along pretty far in my blogging knowledge level. Just got knocked down below a new level created four below novice - let's call it: without-a-clue.

Did not realize there was free stuff out there. As I surfed and read, then read more and surfed, and yet surfed some more and read blogs I liked, it never dawned on me that any one of the one's I've come to "know and love" were hawking someone else's wares. Maybe that's because, as far as I can tell, I'd bet nine out of ten of them are not.

What I'm trying to say, but taking too long as usual, is that I have instinctively, unknowingly steered away from reading those. Get it? I somehow surfed passed them for whatever reason - maybe because I was out in blog world looking for real people, real stories albiet in a disconnected format. If I want commercials on products, I know where my remote control is to the TV. (You know, the one with the overused "mute" button from blanking out all of the ads? And, yes, I, too, am a marketer by profession, blogger for love.) Out here, this time is for my search for honest connections in this overly digitized world, not for sales hits.  Therefore, I have developed a blog of my own that does not rely on getting free stuff.

Of course, folks may have read mine and assumed I was getting swag from the pharmacology industry or the Dixie Chicks or even the makers of an anti-strep throat vaccine. All of which would be false, considering my medical bills are through the rough, I've paid for all of my DC CDs and I currently have Strep.

Interesting points brought up here. I look forward to reading more about this now that I have moved out of La-La Land.

Peace, Kathleen

http://abomo.wordpress.com

The Essential Vita

Vita is a well-known Goddess who lives on a Mountain This column is an inspired look at Vita's world and attitudes to love, spiritual matters world politics and the less examined issues of life in the 21st century

For me, the problem lies in what all of this creates. Women who are looking to get "paid" have a hunger to compete with the next blogger. I know we all want traffic and exposure, but if you are relying on it as income for your family, it heightens the stakes. Sometimes, that leads to aggressive behavior. It leads to dishonesty. It leads to fierce competition. This is what creates the blogwars, and the cliques. Sometimes this distorts the message. 

I'm sure, for many women, paid blogging, celebrity blogging, is all very empowering. I don't want to put anyone down who really gets something from their blog that I'm fortunate enough to find in other places, like my job or in my real-life community involvement. I'm a feminist, so I tend to want to say if it is good for women....but is this really good for women. Where is blogging taking us as a whole, as a collective? 

I feel like there are too many bloggers who are following a formula on their blogs because it is the popular trend of the moment. I hate the whole idea that people are thinking...Why should I post something deep and interesting on my blog if I know I can get attention, and then more comments, and more exposure, leading all to more money by posting a picture of myself tongue kissing a "celebrity" blogger. Or, I can tell some story of my kids wetting his pants to make my readers laugh while secretly advertising for pampers. That is the stuff that makes my skin crawl.  

I worry about the impact we as bloggers, and more so as women, are having on the way womanhood is being definied in online, and off-line society. I worry that content is being contorted by this money-popularity-exposure need that runs so deep in so many women. And, worst yet, you have the bloggers who are using their blogs like this who will be the first to cry and lament that they are not getting taken seriously by journalist or people in the publishing field. They point fingers at women like myself who speak out about doing it differently and they cry victimization.   

I know it is to each their own. I know I have a choice on my own blog, and in my own reader. But, someday my baby girl is going to grow up. She is going to be online. She is going to join communities such as this. I want her to know that she is worth more than photo-shopped images, or the hawking of your personal stories for fabric softner. I want her to know that women are powerful and potent, and that their words carry weight. It is because of this that I refuse to market mine for products, in fact I've been toying with the idea of taking even my blogher ads down. It's just that I feel this strange loyalty to you ladies for being crazy enough to allow me to speak at Blogher. 

I guess what it comes down to for me is this, my words are my currency. I choose to use them for the impact I hope they have on my readers, and on myself as I reflect.

I guess everyone has to make their own personal choice in that matter.  

Peace,

Kelly

http://www.ordinaryartblog.com

I thought free stuff was amazing and exciting at first.

Then it started piling up on my desk - all this stuff I felt obligated to write about because someone was "kind" enough to send it to me for free. 

Then I realized it take days and days to read a book and a book review constitutes free work on my part, not generosity on their part. 

So too the razor I hated, the books and toys my daughter doesn't care about. 

Free trips are probably worth it, but free stuff just became a huge source of guilt/resentment. 

How cheap am I? I'm willing to write 500 words - reducing the fair market value of the written word for all writers, not to mention reducing ad space sales (why buy the cow (ad space) when you can get the mommyblogger for free?) - for an $8 razor or a book I never would have read anyway? 

Then the PR people harass me if I don't write about them - most of the time I choose not to write about them if I hate thier product - like the jewelry company whose product gave me a rash and no one would accept it as a Christmas Gift or the book which badly needed an editor - and I feel guilty anyway. 

Finally, it just feels like yet another way for women to give themselves away for free (where's the hopes and dreams of an income you can survive on, health insurance and a 401K? - we're trading that for a free girdle tank top and a tube of expensive vitamin mascara) Of course, I've yet to have a PR or Marketing person actually offer to pay me MONEY. I've only heard rumors of such things.

The Girl Revolution
( http://www.thegirlrevolution.com )

But for a washer/dryer or super-swanky vacuum? I'll tattoo the name of the product on my child's forehead. I mean, they have to learn about marketing sometime...it may as well be in the mirror as she brushes her teeth with the (new and improved!) super-spinny, music-making child-oriented toothbrush I got for free in exchange for only 1000 words and a piece of my family's soul!

jennydecki

Beyond Mom Blog ( http://beyondmom.com )

I listened to you all in the early days of Air America.

Thanks so much for the kind words - all of you. 

Mom-101 ( http://mom-101.blogspot.com )
( http://coolmompicks.com )

Cool Mom Picks.com ( http://coolmompicks.com )

on both the BlogHer of the Week Award and the commentary on compensation. 

Free stuff is good. But free opinion is better. Aren't Jon and Kate a cautionary tale about accepting so much stuff you lose sight of your life? Is a box of cereal or new iron really worth it? 

Nice work, Mom- 101. 

SatelliteSisterLian

www.satellitesisters.com ( http://www.satellitesisters.com/ )

www.chaoschronicles.com ( http://chaoschroniclesbyliandolan.blogspot.com/ )

You made me want to be a parenting blogger before Asa was a glint in my eye!

Morra Aarons-Mele
www.womenandwork.org

A high honor totally and completely deserved!

Rita Arens writes at Surrender Dorothy ( http://surrenderdorothy.typepad.com ) and BlogHer and is the editor of Sleep is for the Weak ( http://tinyurl.com/9pg62e ).

but I did offer mudwresting up as an alternative!

Politics & News Contributing Editor
Queen of Spain ( http://queenofspainblog.com/ )

My gosh Lisa, thank you, I'm really honored.

But easily the best part of my post are the reader comments. So many really great insights and self-reflection, so much good discussion without name-calling and anonymous threats. And really, only one person insinuating that I'm full of crap. That's pretty good!

Mom-101 ( http://mom-101.blogspot.com )
( http://coolmompicks.com )

Cool Mom Picks.com ( http://coolmompicks.com )