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YahooThis post about looking for "middle-aged" bloggers got me to thinking. First of all, what the hell is middle-age these days? I'm almost 40 (less than a month to go!), and I spend less time thinking about age than I do about not being a mother in terms of blogging, as well as in general. I'm not trying to start a war or anything, but sometimes, it's hard to be a non "mommy blogger" for a lot of reasons (monetary being one of them). Don't get me wrong. It's been my choice not to have children, a choice I have never regretted, nor do I begrudge motherhood for anyone who wants that for themselves. But as comfortable as I am with my choices--as a single, almost middle-aged woman without children--I am beginning to feel like a real rarity in the America and any place I have to check boxes (like BlogHer). I also realize that there are many women and men who would like to have children can cannot for various reasons. And because theirs is not a choice, its not as easy to explain.
Anyway, I grew up as the oldest of over 60 cousins and was a nanny so know as much about rearing children as anyone can who doesn't actually have one of their own. That's not what this is about--its about getting stuck when one tries to categorize oneself into neat categories. I know many "mommy bloggers" hate being thought of as, well, mommy bloggers--as if that's all they are. I thought this could be a really interesting conversation. Sometimes I feel like being a single, non-mother is a revolutionary act--at least I hope so the way some people react! Of course, for me, choosing to be a mother would probably be even more revolutionary, but that's another story! Thoughts about not fitting into neat categories out there? Did I read correctly--is there a session at BlogHer about being a non mommy-blogger at BlogHer?
Those darn boxes...
smartchica47 July 7, 2008 - 7:59am
I'm single, no kids, late 30's and I've definitely often wondered where to find 'my kind' in the blogosphere. What the heck DO you call those of us in our mid-30's to 40's? I don't feel 'middle-aged' but I have no idea what to call us! And not having kids definitely means our lives look different from others our age.
Maybe part of the issue for bloggers is that one way to build your blogging community is specifically by aiming at a particular niche. For me personally, I know that if a life-oriented blog is too all over the place, even if I like the way the person writes, I won't become a regular reader. So I look for blogs that are more focused on issues that are relevant to some aspect of my own life - but the more tightly focused you get, the fewer people who can relate. For example, I think many of the blogs that talk about being happily single are written by 20-somethings, so while I often find individual posts I love, there are many that reflect that younger stage of life and are less relevant to me now. Maybe all the single not-quite-middle-aged women bloggers are writing about things like politics or social activism, rather than life as a single, not-quite-middle-aged woman?
btw, in my quirkyeconomist blog, I talk a lot about being happily single, particularly in a world where most of my friends have kids, so feel free to join me there!
Jenn
http://quirkyeconomist.blogspot.com