The Love We Wish For Our Sons

Book Discussion

Jeffrey Zaslow wrote The Magic Room: A Story About the Love We Wish for Our Daughters because he has three daughters whom he loves very much. He is an involved parent who cares so much that his daughters know this that he wrote this book and dedicated it to them. I have nothing but respect for that, but at the same time I have to wonder -- what about the love we wish for our sons?

For all of us who desperately wish that our girls will go through life safe, happy and surrounded by love, time spent here offers visceral reminders of the challenges our girls face, of the way in which sadness is so often intertwined with their joy, and of the sweet possibilities that await them -- or that may be beyond their grasp. P. viii

I think it's fabulous when any parent wants to express love for their children, but I've often felt like men get the bad end of the deal when it comes to talking about love. It's not considered "manly" in our society for men to express their love. And weddings? I don't know how many times I've seen it suggested in books, television shows and movies that weddings are not for men. It makes me a little sad and I think that most men really do care. It's a special day for them as well.


father and son



Credit: Jeffrey D-5000


Perhaps it's because I've got a lot of men in my life. I have four (much older) brothers. I have seven nephews. Many of my friends have sons. I have wonderful male friends. The love that Zaslow wishes for his daughters is the same as I wish for the men in my life. I was reminded this when reading Jenna's review of The Magic Room on Stop, Drop and Blog.

"When it comes down to it, The Magic Room might be a great gift to hand to a woman who is just recently engaged and is looking for a dress. But, as a note, there is a love that mothers also wish for their sons, and it’s more than what’s in a dress or a wedding celebration.

I do understand why Zaslow chose a bridal shop for his book, and I was touched by the stories he shared of the brides he met. I loved that a father cared so deeply about finding ways to express love for his daughters -- for all daughters, really. Yet part of me was saddened that once again in the story of love, weddings and marriage, men were relegated to the supporting cast. The men these women are marrying are someone's son, and I hope that they know that someone wishes this love for them as well.

Why do you think that we focus so much on women at weddings? Is it the dress? What kind of love do you wish for the men in your life?

BlogHer Book Club Host Karen Ballum also blogs at Sassymonkey and Sassymonkey Reads.

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