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Most of the big decisions I’ve made in my life were motivated by boredom. I spent a semester abroad in college; moved to California and then back to the east coast; changed jobs after living in the DC area for less than a year -- all because I felt like I needed to do something different. When boredom starts to weigh me down, I start feeling like I need a major change in order to shake things up.
I’ve been wondering if maybe this isn’t the best strategy. Sometimes a major change can yield great, unexpected results -- and I don’t regret any of the ones I’ve made so far -- but it’s not a cure for boredom. (A temporary distraction, sure.)
If I’ve learned one thing, it’s that making a major change isn’t the only answer. I’m not saying I won’t move away from my current location at some point, or that I won’t change my job once I find something better suited for me, but I know I can’t be in a rush just because I feel like it's time to change things right now.
I can’t move away or change my job every time I get bored or frustrated. I’ve done this before, and the one huge lesson I’ve learned is that once you get to that new location, or settle into that new job, the feelings of boredom will come back. I’m the same person whether I live in Virginia, France, or Zanzibar. Humans are adaptable creatures and we tend to get used to changes in our lives very quickly.
Having previously made those big changes, I finally realized that I need to make more of an effort where I am right now. If I wait for a location change or a new job to bring unknown experiences into my life, I’ll always be flitting around from here to there, never satisfied with what I have.
I have to learn to open my eyes and search for experiences that aren’t far from my grasp, that are accessible to people who stay in one place. For me this means learning to be more social (which has been happening), and taking classes so I can keep my mind occupied with new information and experiences (which I’ve also been doing). I’ve been making an effort to do these things, but I know I could do better. Sometimes it’s hard, but I also have to remember that it’s my day job that gives me the ability to pay for all the things I want to do (like the classes I try and trips I take).
Boredom is both good and bad. It can be a huge source of frustration, but it’s also a fantastic motivator. If I didn’t get so irritated with the excruciating sameness of things, if I didn’t feel like I was doing the same thing day after day…what else would motivate me to change the ways things are?
I’m the kind of person who doesn’t like watching TV because I hate commercials; who won’t re-read a book or go out of my way to watch a movie I’ve already seen; who can’t spend more than 15 minutes on an exercise machine at the gym; who wouldn’t dare get on the Metro for my daily commute without some kind of reading material. I know these things about myself, so I take precautions: I get books from the library so I’ll have something new to read, and I make sure I always have one of those books with me when I get on the Metro; I go outside to get exercise (where the scenery changes!) so I don’t have to stay indoors.
Since I’ve learned to do these things automatically in my daily life, it should work the same way with the bigger things, too. I need to keep looking for new challenges so I won’t get to the point where I’m so frustrated that I feel like my only recourse is to do something major.
What do you do in your daily life to keep things fresh and new?
Related Reading:
Jennifer is bored and restless and, like me, she knows she must continue to work if she wants to afford all the things she has planned in the upcoming months. Her post is called “Ramblings of a Restless Hermit.”
Auburn Kat has been in a “major boredom funk lately and just can’t seem to figure out how to
