Boy! You better take a bath and learn how to speak!
By My Teenager and... on January 25, 2012
Okay Mr. "I'm Working the Drive-Thru at McDonald's" boy, it's time you and I have a talk.
First of all, you need to shower. Seriously, dude. You work in a restaurant. I realize that it's McDonald's, and perhaps you don't think it's important to show responsibility towards your employer by displaying personal hygiene. However, there are thousands of people a day who see you. Just because the fries are greasy, it does NOT give you the green light to not wash your hair, brush your teeth or clean your face.
Secondly, it is vital that you enunciate your words when you are speaking to customers. Sentences such as, "thank you" should not sound like "taannnu." No sir. And, "please pull forward" should not come across as, "plapolfooo."
Even my son, who speaks "teenager language," looked at me and said, "What the hell did he just say?" You received a failing grade from one of your own peers. That's bad!
Let me tell you this young drive-thru employee, laziness will not help you to move forward in life. Although I applaud you for working a respectable job, I give you a FAIL on your overall cleanliness and vocabulary. When you use one long, weird, drawn-out syllable rather than a well-spoken sentence, you sound lazy and detached. It doesn't take anymore time to say it correctly - especially when customers have to ask you three times what you said. Dude! Three freakin' times! Think of this, oh mighty slurer of words, in essence you just spent more energy saying it wrong than you would have if you had just said it correctly in the first place.
Perhaps I should post this to your parents, rather than you. Parents! Pay attention to your kid! Do you not notice that he looks as if he just came off of a three day drunken black out? Do you not notice that he slurs one long syllable rather than breaking it into three distinct words? Send that boy to "Camp Mom" and I'll get him squared away.
Now here's the deal kid. I want you to go home tonight and take a shower. Put your clothes in the washing machine so they are clean tomorrow (and please, for the love of God, pull them up over your hips! When you brought out our food in one hand while holding up your pants in the other, I just about choked) and get a good night's sleep. Tomorrow is a new day. I hope you will heed my advice and clean up your act because next time, I assure you, I will be telling this to you directly through the McDonald's window.