Bride To Be
So in just about one year I will be getting married, 8-13-11. I have had a lot on my mind lately regarding this, which is probably something every soon to be bride goes through. I have been thinking a lot about what the bible says about marriage, and how we are suppose to live a biblical and spiritual marriage, I have also been researching the biblical term of submission and what that means to submit ourselves to our husbands. A good friend of mine, who is a minister told myself and my fiance to read this bible verse and then determine what it means to each of us individually.
22Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansinga]">[a] her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30for we are members of his body. 31"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh."b]">[b] 32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
What exactly does it mean to submit yourself to your husband? Does this mean that you are to do anything and everything your husband asks of you? Is the husband suppose to submit to his wife in the same way? How can this even been possible with the world that we live in and each person wanting to have their own individuality?
I have been struggling the past couple of months with myself and who I am, I have not been happy with myself, and don't see how my fiance could want to be with someone like me, when he could do so much better. I have had fears of him leaving me and finding someone else, I have tried to control him and the situations that we are in to no avail, only to cause more pain on us and our relationship and more stress on myself.
I have recently started read a book titled The Shack by William P. Young. Again this was another suggestion from our minister friend. This book has opened up my eyes to the way that I have been living myself compared to the way that God wants us to live our lives. I was born and raised in a Christian home and attended a Christian school from 4th-8th grade. Over the years though I have seemed to drift away from what I was taught while growing up and knowing that if you give yourself to the Lord he will always be there to take care of you, even when things arise you don't think you can handle. I have a lot to work out with God, and maybe this will come in another blog. Since reading the Shack I have realized that I have become very judgemental, every person and every situation I see as a threat to me and my relationship, I always feel that people have an alliterative motive and are out to hurt me. I have also came to the realization that I have been living in the past, and taking what has happened to me in the past and assuming that it is going to happen to me again, with that I have also been trying to control my future and the way that it goes and what happens. All of these things are very stressful and cause a lot of pain. I need to start living in the present and realize that I cannot change what has happened in the past nor can I control my future and how it is going to go. God has a plan for all of us, including me and if I continue to try and change that plan each and every day I am going to be miserable for the rest of my life.
This brings me back to the questions that I asked earlier, at this time though I am just going to focus on the biblical term of submission. Lets go back and look at the verse that I spoke of in the begin of my blog.
22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be subject to their own husbands in …….. everything, ….. in …everything!
But seriously, how difficult is that to put into practice! Especially when we husbands behave like such idiots sometimes, that’s got to be a really difficult thing for a wife to do…. Nevertheless, wives are to submit to their husbands … as unto the Lord…. in …everything. And that doesn’t mean only when the husband behaves himself, or when you feel like it…. As you serve the Lord by doing everything unto Him, to His glory, so you submit to your husband. And remember our definition of submit? That includes your support and co-operation.
So what I take away from this, is that we as wives are always suppose to there for our husbands no matter what, we should always listen to our husbands opinions and respect and love them by honoring their opinions, even if we feel that their opinions may not be absolutely correct, we are to honor our husbands and hold them to a higher level, similar to how we hold our God to a higher level.
This is very difficult for a lot of people to do in this day an age, as submission is seen as a weakness, we try to submit as little as possible, take the road that causes the least inconvenience to me, its a survival of the fittest. The natural human is always tends to measure his worth by his status and his ego, his status is determined by how few are above him compared to how many are below him. So as humans, we find it difficult to allow anyone to tell us that we may be wrong or that we cannot do something, may people find this controlling and will not tolerate it, but if we are to live a biblical marriage and honor our husbands submission is something that we have to learn to accept.