Last week I wrote about looking for silver linings and finding gratitude even when we are feeling less than thankful. But is positive thinking always the right approach? Author Barbara Ehrenreich says no.

Barbara Ehrenreich is perhaps best known for her book Nickle and Dimed where she took several low-paying jobs and reported on the lives of the working poor. She wrote Bright-Sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America after being treated for breast cancer and finding her anger being dismissed.

Although I've not yet read the book and have just read reviews and seen interviews with the author, I think Ehrenreich raises some important points. While positive thinking and optimism can provide for greater happiness and a sense of well-being it can also be a tool for beating yourself up or for ignoring tough realities.

You are not a bad person if you think that something is hard or painful or difficult. You do not bring bad things on yourself if you say truthfully that you're having a bad day rather than cheerily proclaiming everything hunky dory! Problems will happen, you will make mistakes and some days will suck regardless of how perfectly you think good thoughts.

Ehrenreich discusses how bright-sided thinking leads workers to believe that losing their job is somehow their fault or spend time trying to convince themselves that it is a fabulous opportunity to build "brand you" while ignoring the realities of global corporate and political actions that are far beyond the reach of any individual's mind control through happy thoughts.

Some of Ehrenreich's negativity towards positivity might be driven by a type of confirmation bias. Just as the lottery winner who affirmed their win beforehand or the Oprah Show guest who had a picture of the host on her vision board might believe that they bent the universe to their will, going through treatment for cancer might have led her to want to somehow prove that it wasn't her fault she got sick and the outcome of her treatment didn't require perfect positivism.

There is no one right way to react or cope with difficult times and I think whatever approach keeps you sane and strong and gets you through to the other side is a valid choice. Neither swallowing whole or rejecting outright what the gurus are peddling gets you to Nirvana. Taking what works for you and leaving behind what does not is how we get to the truth.

Have you read Bright-Sided? What were your thoughts on the book? How do you strike a balance between positive empowerment and allowing yourself to legitimately wallow in the occasional comfort of a pint of Ben and Jerry's?

Related Reading:

Anna N. at Jezebel: Bright-Sided: The Negative Consequences Of Positive Thinking

Other forms of positive thinking, especially that imposed by employers, are far more damaging to society. Ehrenreich mentions the role of optimistic yes-men in the financial crisis and the Iraq war, but she could have condemned even more strongly the movement that seeks to convince people that losing their jobs is awesome. While looking on the bright side of a layoff may make sense on a personal level, it also discourages any sort of collective action. Ehrenreich writes in her postscript that "positive thinking has been a tool of repression worldwide" and that "the threats we face are real and can be vanquished only by shaking off self-absorption and taking action in the world." The latter seems like the real key point of Bright-Sided — that convincing ourselves that things are already good can keep us from making them better, both for ourselves and for others — and I wish Ehrenreich had made it more forcefully throughout her book, not just in the postscript. It's a message that deserves to be heard.

Nancy Colasurdo, Life Coach at Fox Business: Why Too Much Positive Can Become Negative

Ehrenreich has effectively called us out. She was first motivated to explore the positive thinking movement while going through the ordeal of breast cancer with a three-part harmony of pink ribbons, teddy bears and upbeat chatter. It was enough to send her right over the edge and in search of sane support. In our recent interview, she recalled talking to a career coach when she was in an undercover persona researching another book, Bait and Switch.

“I said, ‘I’m a little concerned about my age as a factor in keeping me from getting jobs,’” Ehrenreich said. “And [the coach] said, ‘Your age is whatever you feel it is.’”

Janice Harayda at One-Minute Book Reviews: 'Smile or Die' - Barbara Ehrenreich's 'Bright-sided'

Ehrenreich found when she was diagnosed with breast cancer that a cult of optimism pervaded articles and books about the disease that made her feel isolated instead of supported....

She also found that “positive thinking” can exact a terrible price in self-blame if a cancer defies treatment. As the oncology nurse Cynthia Rittenberg has written, the pressure to think positively is “an additional burden to an already devastated patient.”...

In a chapter called “God Wants You to Be Rich,” Ehrenreich faults the so-called “prosperity gospel” preached by superstar pastors like Joel Osteen, whose churches offer “services that might, in more generous nations, be provided by the secular welfare state,” such as pre- and after-school programs. Certainly those ministries may foster self-blame. (If God wants you to be rich and you’re not, you don’t have enough faith.) But if the churches that promote the “prosperity gospel” are offering low- or no-cost day care that enables parents to seek prosperity by holding jobs, doesn’t that count for something? You sense that such programs are exactly kind of thing that Ehrenreich might love, if only they weren’t endorsed by pastors who wear too much gel in their mullets.

Jessie Kunhardt at The Huffington Post: Bright-Sided: Smart Analysis Or Missing Something?

Some of us like that kind of constant positivity, some of us don't. We'd like to know how you feel. Do you want to hear the platitudes about difficulties being a blessing? Or does that make you want to deck somebody? What's the best way to approach people in tough situations? And if you've read the book, does Ehrenreich do a good job of convincing you that positivity isn't everything?

Nora Ephron at The Daily Beast: Nora Ephron's Must-Reads

It’s Ehrenreich’s belief that almost everything that’s wrong in this country comes from an addiction to positive thinking. She takes on all the hucksters who travel the country insisting that optimism will cure you, change your life and/or make you rich.

Janet Maslin at The New York Times: Up to Her Neck in Pink Ribbons and Smiley Faces

“Bright-Sided” begins with Ms. Ehrenreich’s highly humanizing chapter about her illness and with her legitimate scorn for “the ultrafeminine theme of the breast cancer marketplace.” (“Certainly men diagnosed with prostate cancer do not receive gifts of Matchbox cars.”) After that it takes a downhill trajectory. The next chapter concerns the cultural validation of “magical thinking,” as in the book “The Secret,” which makes another barn-sized target. What is the real meaning of that book’s assertion that we can attract whatever we want by wishing for it? “Bright-Sided” rightly says that the meaning is twofold: that we are encouraged to override the wishes of anyone else, and that we become failures when the process doesn’t pay off.

Christine Kane: Dark-Sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Negativity is a Gift

Now, I come from the world of academia. I’m the youngest in a family of philosophers, professors, PhD’s and thinkers. I’ve been told at more than one Thanksgiving dinner that I’m a complete idiot. So by now, I’m so used to the voices of many Ms. Ehrenreichs that it kinda makes me smile. I’m not dismissing the very real anger that she has and that has been expressed all over the media. But I do see it as missing the point. (Plus, it’s much easier to stay angry and stuck, claiming your victim status – than it is to do the work to actually shift your thought patterns. I know this from experience.)

Here’s the thing though.

I also see this kind of thing as a gift. Every time someone “pushes up against you” or your beliefs, it’s a gift. Even cynicism, criticism, and angry siblings can be a gift because they all get you clearer in making a conscious choice of how you want to live. People don’t have to agree with you in order for you to feel okay about your heart, mind and soul.

BlogHer CE Maria Niles keeps it real at PopConsumer