I recently saw the film "Bucket List" -- in which two men with terminal illnesses decide that they will embark on a quest to fulfill as many items as they can from their "Before I die I want to..." lists. The film is worth watching. Morgan Freeman's character really got my attention when he said that the ancient Egyptians believed we are asked two questions before entering the afterlife -- “Have you found joy in your life?” and “Has your life brought joy to others?”
I wondered what I would say.
Do I have an unspoken "to do" list -- things I want to accomplish in whatever vast or small amount of time before I pass from this life? Do you? Is there, lurking in my mind, some joy-filled goal list -- do I want there to be?
I discovered that I did have a list informally filed away in my below-conscious thoughts. I hadn't been aware of it, hiding there, accumulating items, but there it was, unfolding my own secrets to me as though they had been rolled up in ancient parchment and buried away for years.
Here are some samples of the items:
1. Actually finish writing a book, and submit it via an agent for publication.
2. Win the "weight loss war".
3. Grow an entirely organic vegetable garden, and can or freeze the proceeds. (I lived in apartments until this year when I bought a house.)
4. Be of significant and focused help to a single charitable cause, even if I don't have a lot of money to offer.
5. Take a pottery course.
6. Learn to do intricate mosaic.
7. Go back to Australia for a long visit.
8. Forgive anyone I have yet to forgive.
These are items that without some extra effort will not happen in the course of my average days. They all hit the "I- want-to-get-to-this-eventually list" -- many landed there long ago. I looked at it and realized that there are really no outrageous obstacles that would prevent me from getting an item onto a "fulfilled" list. I also realized that part of me carried these and the other items on my list of undone items as burdens, longings, and in some cases deep yearnings.
They all have an "I can do this later" sense of disposability -- as though they were options as opposed to important goals. What's up with that? None would harm anyone. Each would bring me joy. What about that is disposable and why?
Do you have such a list? What reasonable joys are you deferring, and for how long?
We all defer joys, defer accomplishments. Sometimes it makes huge sense to slide something over to the wait-for-it column, but I suspect most of you have a list thatworks like mine -- it is full of possible things, things that can be done with attention and time.
Why are we waiting? I looked at the list and realized that I have been wanting to take a pottery class for over 30 years. That is just plain silly. I have the time. There must be classes nearby. This one seems easy to do -- so I'll pluck that off the list this next week and find a place to take lessons.
Some items will have to be squeezed in. That's OK -- I have room to squeeze if I am honest with myself.
Some items require a disciplined commitment. I can do that.
How would it benefit all of us to have "rounder lives"? Lives that had more reasonable joys in them? Are there undone items on your list that would bring you or others increased joy? What is stopping you from clipping away at your list?
Proverbs 13:12 Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.
RELATED BLOGS
Julie at Julie Unscripted tackles the issue of helping others lose weight as she has -- and not deferring the actions needed.
Natalie starts her list here.
Tasha posts her list, and adds a list of qualities for which she would like to be remembered.
You can read Lynda's list here.
This Brazen Teacher posts her from-the-heart list here.
Comments
Joy is a practice
Lovely post. There's a book I have referred to in parenting classes: Teaching Children Joy! I do think it is a skill that can be taught and a practice one must embrace. We actually give more to each other from fulfillment and overflow than from emptiness.
I'm working on my joys - blogging is one of them.
Trying to get published and trying to get an agent are on-going goals. I found joy just in claiming myself as a writer by writing and submitting.
Good and plenty! blog.candelariasilva.com
good point
Joy is a practice -- it is lso like a muscle in that it needs to be worked out/on to stay in shape :-)
~~ Contributing Editor, Mata H. also blogs right along at Time's Fool
Just A List? Mine is Book I Keep Adding
Pages
What do I want to do with the remainder of my life? To do good creative work. To help a child that I will never meet but might need to read something that helps her to take the next step. It was done for me and I'd like to pass it along the line.
I want to cause a racket but also live in peace. Not to be afraid or allow fear to spontaneously grip me. To stop allowing other people from disrupting my connection to Spirit.
To swim naked in a pool without fear or judgment. I have to be naked because I will not put on a crummy bathing suit that amplifies how un-perfect I am. I got 17,000 more ideas but this will do for a start.
You really should take the pottery class - I loved having the clay move through my fingers or doing hand constructions.
Gena - Out On The Stoop
i lobve that line
"cause a racket but live in peace" --- someone should get that embroidered on a sampler! or posted on a highway billboard!
~~ Contributing Editor, Mata H. also blogs right along at Time's Fool
i did the 101 things in 1001
i did the 101 things in 1001 days meme a while ago. i must dig it up, because i think i can cross a heap of them off. I liked it because it added a sense of immediacy to my longer term goal. i did a lot of them (like growing strawberries!) sooner, just because they were on the list.
i like the idea of a book. i've written these things so many times, they should all be in one place.
as for the question at the beginning of your post, Mata, you certainly bring joy to me!
Thanks so much!
Thx for the kind words. They mean a lot! I like the idea of 101 in 1001...I'll ponder that one!
~~ Contributing Editor, Mata H. also blogs right along at Time's Fool
1000 Things I want to Do Before I Die...
Great POST!
Before I saw the movie I started my "Bucket List" I called it 1000 Things I Want To Do Before I Die" I peridocally at at the end of my post...ther is no real time frame just as I feel like adding a few things. I love it.
It is a lot harder to think up 1000 things. I mean of course all the general things. But as I dig deeper and ask the authentic quesions which always need a bit more discernment I am awed and wowed with the things that are on my heart and in my mind.
Love,
Babz
Hi Babz!
It is true that by pushing the number up some real disclosure-surprises happen. I have found that to be true of gratitue lists big time!
~~ Contributing Editor, Mata H. also blogs right along at Time's Fool
I'm with Gena
Mine is a Bucket Book! It's filled with great adventures I have yet to experience.
I firmly believe in making them happen throughout your life and not waiting until you're in the position of those men. With that theory in mind the Farmer and I have already completed some of the items.
- We've visited nearby places with historical significance, including a lovely weekend in Hannibal, Missouri, Mark Twain's boyhood home.
-We've climbed almost all of the major Mayan ruins in North America including the spectacular Tikal in Guatemala. The Farmer did his best Indiana Jones imitation
-We've flown around Central America in bush planes. Very exciting.
-We've stayed in a thatched hut casita on an island with no roads and no TV.
- We've supported a young boy at Dr. Hubert Morquette's Kings Garden Orphanage in Haiti.
I hope I've given lots of joy to others. I work at that, very conscious about the effort.
Suzanne, the Farmer's Wife
great list
What a fine list -- -I love that you have giving as a priority as well. Enjoy!
~~ Contributing Editor, Mata H. also blogs right along at Time's Fool
Bucket List
I found your blog today while surfing. I, too, watched the bucket list (and cried). I too wrote a blog about it. It can be found here.
http://weblog.xanga.com/juejee/664923634/bucket-list.html