Can You Feel The Power? ~ a mothers path to insanity or serentity

Is it not completely insane to think that “I” the wife and mother of the house holds the fate of every individuals day who lives here in the palm of my hand? You may think I am being incredibly self absorbent, on a power trip or simply just that I have lost my mind by making that statement, but please indulge me for a minute of your day.

That first glance of my glowing coffee pot in the early morning is like a beam of salvation for a sleep deprived mother of 3. Many thoughts crossing my mind as I mentally check off all the “to do’s” of my day. I then begin to question why I have so much to do..then blame myself for feeling  like my kids or I have to participate in everything which then is preceded by a lack of motivation, bad attitude and completely feeling sorry for myself. This is all before I even devour my first cup of joe! Soon after, I am dragging my older kids out of bed to prepare for school, coordinating early pickup times to leave for sporting events in addition to trying to avoid the “Battle Royal”  currently being played out in my living room between my two horse sized dogs. By this time I almost have completely lost my mind. Yet, I carry on in successfully finding my husbands shoes he is so frantically searching for, double checking backpacks and brushed teeth while swiftly pushing them out the door to school. Breathing a sigh of relief I turn only to find two large dogs and a two-year old staring into my eyes as if I needed to report to them five minutes ago. At this point I have 2 paths I can choose:

Path #1: March by them acting like I never even saw them, go directly to my coffee pot for round two and sit on my couch to watch a “reality” show set in a warm location with women who dress amazing, have nannys, and go on lavish vacations. Thus, Resulting in a state of complete depression, contemplating “what my life would be like” scenarios in my head if I was as ”fortunate” as these women. All while getting nothing accomplished in my house, walking in to my toddlers room finding drawings on the wall, and on her entire naked body and then one of my dogs eating the crayon evidence. ( dont even ask me where her clothes were)

Then we have….

Path #2: Acknowledge my daughter, let the dogs outside to play, and make some breakfast “during” breakfast time. Complete my dishes while having a conversation with one of the loves of my life…her eagerness to discuss whatever is on her mind leaves me with nothing but laughter and a smile as she carries on about the important aspects of a two-year olds life. This path results in actually accomplishing something, interacting with one of the most important things in my life and possibly gaining a renewed sense of self-worth to carry on the remainder of the day.

While most of you are thinking HELLO CRAZY LADY its obvious, path #2 should always be your choice. All I can say is , the result of path #1 regarding a naked two-year old artist and accomplice Weimaraner are nothing less than 100% reality in my home. It’s no lie as mothers and wives at one point or another you are going to feel some of the same emotions I have, and you will choose your path. This choice will not only impact you, but will also have a lasting effect on everyone in your home. My short temper in the morning with my dogs can spread to my 12-year-old daughter like the plague, which then gets passed to my 7-year-old son when he bumps into his big sister by accident trying to get to his toothbrush in the morning. All while my toddler is watching us all interact and suddenly becomes hostile with the dogs giving her a sense of invincibility as she gets the courage to do a tightrope walk along the back of the couch, only to be found by her dad rushing around last-minute to find his shoes so he can leave for work on time. Swiftly removing her from a sure trip to the ER that morning, he looks at me like I was on vacation the whole morning. Which then results in me reacting like a psycho ward patient in front of everyone. This is just and ugly picture to paint. Ultimately the whole point of this entry is to realize how much influence I have on my family. I can totally control the mood and attitude of everyone. While this is a huge responsibility to only be taken seriously I cant help but feel like a superhero with all this power. While motherhood brings so many trials, I look back at it all as lessons learned and mistakes still being made yet the blessings it all brings in reflection makes the journey ahead so much more bearable. What path will you choose today?