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By now, many of us are awakened to the fact that one, these journeys to Earth are nothing but visits to the most prestigious school in the Universe and two, that one of the main courses is Love 101. Sounds simple enough but at least for me it’s been one of my hardest classes. Through several semesters, I’ve struggled not only with self-love but with loving those who seem to have shown up like the hoodlums from the surrounding rough schools that would start arriving shortly before the bell rang for no other reason than to have fun torturing and abusing those who least expected it.
It’s no secret that I read a lot. It’s my most favorite thing to do when I finally sit still. I don’t read novels or non-fiction. I’ve never been drawn to the little paperbacks with the bare-chested Fabio-type men on the covers that my sisters, mom and friends used to insist I would love. I’m not saying there is anything wrong with those books or those who enjoy them. I admit, I’ve never been one good at relaxing, having fun and/or escaping which is how they would describe their time with those books to me.
Being pulled to what I would describe as many “soul books” I’ve come across one thing over and over again. First let me tell you what I mean by “soul book.” Those are books that are about past life regression, near death and life-between life experiences; books where the author is either speaking from first hand experience with being out of body and in another dimension for a time, or where he or she is reporting the stories of others. Either way the messages brought back are always so similar if not being repeated over and over again that one can’t help believing there is truth to much of what is “brought back.”
The other day I not only came across one of those “truths” yet again, but for the first time was able to feel that I had finally “swallowed” the “pill.” More surprising than that was to notice that I no longer choked trying. This time I smiled while I realized it had “gone down” very smoothly. At that moment I realized that I had finally passed my own exam; the one I had set up long before arriving here yet again.
The latest “messenger,” Tony Stubbs, whose name actually came to me in a dream weeks before the “phone call” as I have come to call it said it this way:
“You-the-soul choose the other players in your incarnation’s drama from your soul group of maybe a thousand other souls, who also choose you to play ‘bit parts’ in theirs. Those you choose to cause you the greatest harm are your closest and most trusted soul buddies, for they love you enough to create karma by their actions. Just as a school child goes through the series of semesters with the same group of students and forms deep friendships, you meet up with incarnations of the same group of souls in each lifetime. You have close friends and others you hardly know.”
If you’re like me and many others you also choked on the part that once again says those who hurt us most each lifetime in reality also love us the most; beyond belief or comprehension of our 3D minds. Each time I would come across that in a book that my soul was enjoying and agreeing with page after page, that message was like the scratch on the record. (Google “vinyl records” if you were born after CD’s) I would suddenly be snapped out of the trance of reading, learning and remembering what my soul knew as many truths, into one of two places-not being sure if I believed that statement fully or one of worry that I might never be able to be at peace with that idea. Right away I could think of those who have hurt my heart most deeply this lifetime and it was very hard to imagine that they might, on a soul level, even love me more than those who have been so easy to love and accept love from. It was hard to do what it is said Yeshi (Jesus) reminded us to do which is to “turn the other cheek.” Instead I would maybe put my feet more firmly in the ground trying to reassure myself that the lesson was to learn to stand up for myself; to not “let” others
