Coming Home To Our First Honeymoon

It's not like I consider marrying a man 12 years my junior to be a major life achievement, but is it really wrong of me to have wanted to have him by my side at my 30 year high school reunion - for purposes of showing him off? My class mates are doctors, lawyers, and foreign affairs workers, whereas I am a part-time insurance agent/occasional full-time step-mom and blogger.  It just seemed to me that having a little arm-candy to show-off would have at least bought me some street-cred. But his work schedule would not allow him to accompany me, so instead I had to just take advantage of any opportunity presented to mention that my husband is much younger, super hot, and unfortunately out-of-town.


I was happy I took the trip to see my sister and attend my reunion but I was in a hurry to get home. Brunch with old friends was worth it, but it gave me a late start, and I wanted to put some distance between myself and LA before nightfall. Another 15 hours of driving ahead of me, I had time for reflection. This was the longest my husband and I had been apart since getting married a few months ago. Since that time, we had encountered some life stressors, in addition to the average expected newlywed issues (too much ice cream before bed...). Work complications for us both, and having his young daughters with us more often than not; our married life started not with a honeymoon, but with a feeling of extra burden. This added stress took a toll on our sense of humor. Nate had been at an annual training course for work that week, and while my trip would have been better with him, it was not meant to be. He is in the military so separations are to be expected, both scheduled and unscheduled.


We both knew I wouldn't be able to make this trip straight through, and to help make it easier for me, Nate reserved a hotel room en route. When looking for the hotel, he made sure it put me close enough to arrive home the next day before he’d have to leave for work. He’s clever that one, and I felt happy knowing he was just as anxious to see me as I was to see him. The remainder of the drive went fine, till I was about 50 miles from home, where of course, the normally empty highway came to a dead stop due to road work. It delayed me about 30 minutes, which I did my best to make up for in extra speedy driving from that point on. His last message to me was that he could leave for work at 3:30 at the very latest, so when I finally pulled into our drive way at 3:00 sharp, I felt like I’d saved the day.


Leaving my bags in the car, I rushed through the door and into his arms. (I may be taking poetic license here, I don’t remember for sure, but I think he was lying on the couch when I walked in). We hugged and kissed, and with only 30 minutes to enjoy, it was clear that the best use of our time was to hold each other tight and tell each other how much we loved and missed each other. Then we both realized something, this felt like “the old days”. Before we were married, we would often have two or more weeks apart from each other, and that tight embrace, the confessions of love and loneliness, the sweet nothings that were everything…this was how we would greet each other so long ago in that not so distant past. This too was a reunion, not just with each other, but with the past us. The us before the stress of work, of mutual parenthood, of failures, and missed expectations, of daily everyday life.


Later that week, coming home from dinner, both of us dressed up, and feeling as good as I’m quite sure we looked, I told him I felt like we were on our honeymoon. I really didn't want to give him an excuse to not fulfill the promised honeymoon later this year, so I made sure to let him know that this feeling did not let him off the hook…but yes, that was how I felt, carefree, hopeful, and like we were just starting out. In these weeks since that time, that feeling has persisted, and I hope that even if for only a few minutes at a time, I feel this way every day. 


Being married to my best friend, this person who is truly the other half of me actually is my greatest achievement.


Ariana is Still Growing - - Sept. 2013


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