Communication - Gotta Love It!
I always like to ask people, what made you pick up the phone and call me? Not surprisingly, Communication is the #1 reason people give me. Be it trouble communicating with a spouse, parent, child, or even sibling, not feeling understood by a loved one is incredibly painful and frustrating.
Here's the big secret about communication: You are always communicating. In fact, it is virtually impossible to NOT communicate. We communicate through words, body language, facial expressions, lack of facial expression, tone of voice, eye contact, how we sit, stand, lie down. We send vibes without even doing so consciously. This is the human condition. Our ability to send and receive important messages to each other in times of danger or stress is what has allowed the human race to evolve into the Facebook and Pinterest addicts (guilty!) we are today.
The real trick to communicating isn't in the sending. It's in the receiving. The ability to listen without adding our own emotional baggage to the message. Emotions are powerful things and sometimes they can get in the way of really hearing someone. We can be triggered emotionally without even knowing it consciously and before we know it, find ourselves defensive and shut down. It isn't until we take a step back and really look at our response can we see where we were really reacting from.
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