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When I was a child, my parents were very strict about extra-curricular activities. Anything music-related was generally encouraged, but sports were looked down upon. "You're in school to learn," sniffed my father. "You're not going to be a famous athlete. Sports are a waste of time."
Luckily for all of us, I had absolutely no interest in sports. I hated the feeling of losing: of working so hard, and panting and sweating and aching only to result in my coming in anything but first. So I focused on academics as my parents desired, and took piano lessons and guitar lessons and ballet lessons -- and when my dad thought I was "doing to much," ballet was the first to go.
Now, as an adult, I really regret not being more athletic in my youth. I do believe that athletics teach you things like leadership and teamwork and persistence; but frankly, I think you can learn (and I did learn) those things in other areas of academics - like, for instance, academic organizations and competitions. The primary reason I regret not being more active is because I continue to hate exercise. And now, in my 40's, not exercising is really not an option.
And so, with my daughter Alex, I decided that while I'll still encourage her to focus on academics as much as my West Indian parents did, I also want her to focus on athletics -- but only as a catalyst for her developing a love of exercise. My daughter loves dance and movement, so she takes ballet (as I did), but she also does gymnastics.
Our neighbourhood gymnasium where she takes gymnastics lessons is (quite seredipitously) generally considered one of the best in our city (rumor has it that Mary Lou Retton's kids take gymnastics here), and in truth, Alex does love it. She can't get enough of walking on the balance beam, doing assisted hand stands, and swinging on the uneven bars. And at almost-5-years-old, her "meets" are pretty innocuous: all participants receive medals and trophies, and everyone leaves feeling like a winner. It's all good.
Still, as I sit at her practices waiting for her to finish her lesson, I can't help but glance over to the area where the serious gymnasts are practicing. They're so young, and they practice for so many hours a day. If one of the girls slips or falls or otherwise messes up, the coaches are more likely to scream at her than give her an encouraging word. And honestly? I cringe at the thought of someone screaming at my child like that.
So I've resolved that Alex will remain in gymnastics as long as she enjoys it. If she wants to go on to seriously compete, then of course I'll support her in any way I can. But if she decides it's no longer fun, then we'll find some other athletic activity that she enjoys -- all the while ensuring that she never stops learning the lessons of leadership and teamwork and persistence in other areas of her life. In this way, I hope she learns exercise is important -- but it isn't everything.
What do you think? Do you agree, or disagree? Since I'm such a neophyte when it comes to exercise (and parenting, for that matter), I'd love to hear your views.
Karen Walrond is a writer and photographer living in Houston, Texas. You can see more of her work at Chookooloonks.
