Bio
Unwilling to fully abandon my Chicago-area upbringing, I live in Manhattan with my husband, my teddy bear, and a 10 lb. rabbit, but insist on calling...
 
 
 
 

What’s Hot on BlogHer.com

The Costs of Being Female

  • Share This Post
  • submit
  • 17
  • Sparkle (
    )
     

In what seems like post number 7,000 in the series “Why it costs more to be female,” two recent articles highlight why being attractive prevents women from getting certain types of jobs and how being a mother causes women to earn less than their already underpaid childless peers. (The second story is an oldie, but a goodie.) We also know, of course, that being unattractive also prevents women from getting jobs and that not having children also does not factor into women’s paychecks because they are seen as “cold, odd and somehow emotionally deficient in an almost dangerous way." Also, that women should pay more for insurance since we use more preventative care, which leads to cost savings down the line.

Wow. If I didn’t laugh hysterically after reading that doosey of an intro paragraph, I would curl up into the fetal position and rock back and forth and cry. Certainly these emotional reactions are also because I’m female, but whatever. Don’t forget that women are not to be trusted with important jobs because we are too emotional. On the flip side, although men are essentially animals that cannot control their sexual urges, they absolutely are to be trusted with Very Important Tasks, especially if no attractive women are around to interfere, which is why we should not hire attractive women. And who wants to hire a dog, mother, or childless harridan? No one!

Damn, if women would just stay out of the workplace and stop getting healthcare, the world would be way better. Since I can’t stop other women from sharing their opinions on this and related topics, check these posts out:

30th June 1981:  American feminist and the founder of the National Organization for Women (NOW), speaking out in support of getting the Equal Rights Amendment ratified.  (Photo by Jefferson Siebert/Keystone/Getty Images)

I really, really wanted to link to a post detailing eight ways that feminists are ruining America's women, which has something to do with being fascist, but the very fierce looking author was holding a gun and she kinda scared me. (Women scare easily, you know.) Because one thing I know for sure: women have no sense of humor. (That’s why we are not funny.) Or is it that just feminists have no sense of humor? Hmmmm ...

Suzanne also blogs at Campaign for Unshaved Snatch (CUSS) & Other Rants and is the author of Off the Beaten (Subway) Track.

  • 17
  • Sparkle (
    )
     

Comments

Post comment as twitter logo facebook logo
Sort: Newest | Oldest
sfassioli 5 pts

When my son was born I was working for a japanesse company and I had actually been promoted two years prior to his birth. I was traveling to Latin America and I really loved it. I decided to work part time after the birth of my son and was demoted to my origial position. After my daughter was born I was demoted once again. I don't think I will ever have the opportunity to get my "dream" job back, and I know that now that I am a mother I will never get the salary I once had...it's the sad truth.

http://www.thesfblog-21.blogspot.com/

fabdeb 5 pts

All of us old ladies (40-50-ish) are not dangerous crones, of course. Some of us have turned into cougars or lionesses. The latter, as explained to me by a pair of men in their 20s, are more commanding and primally powerful than mere cougars. To add a bizarre twist, these young men were part of a rock band that was a client of my consulting business. I wasn't sure at first if they were advising me to be a lioness or expressing their desire that I be their lioness. Alas, they professed to be merely "educating" me on the "male mindset." Too bad, since everyone knows that all women over 40 who are not dried-up sexless, mindless crones are mindlessly obsessed with sexually exploiting younger men, who cannot possibly resist our vast experience and expertise.

fabdeb 5 pts

Don't forget the bias against post-menopausal women. After all, everyone knows we're cranky and prone to stripping the clothes off our unattractive old bodies when hit by unpredictable, mysterious hot flashes. In spite of our wealth of wisdom on cooking and mothering (regardless of our prior cooking or mothering experience), everyone knows that our mental capacities ceased along with our periods. In addition, we are unreliable employees, because we may just up and quit when our husbands retire so we can devote all of our time to our well-known passions - quilting and watching our husbands fish.

kate.si 5 pts

Being unattractive can prevent you from getting a front office or retail job. Men can control sexual urges but no one with vision can really remove physical attraction from the judgment equation. Yay...

j_gumieny 5 pts

I'm a college grad who never ended up using my degree because I had my daughter shortly after getting married. I ended up working for the family business due in part to it's great flexibility. Then I had another baby, went back to the family business and then adopted a baby girl from Ethiopia and decided enough so now I am a stay-at-home Mom. In my own opinion, years back, this would have been a great failure but I view my current state as a gift. I am where I need to be whether or not it may appear to have a grand worldly view. We're in the process of adopting twins from Ethiopia, so I'm thinking work in the sense of 9-5 is out of the picture for many years to come and I'm secretly happy about this!

J
www.gfinkfamily.blogspot.com ( http://www.gfinkfamily.blogspot.com )

oviedostyle 5 pts

That is hilarious. I used to feel hopeless when I read about womens struggles. Now I laugh at the absurdity!

Men aren't emotional? Are they robots? Some people just have nothing better to do than tell others(mostly women) what they are capable of. Women just need to realize that we are as capable as men. That way men will start believing it as well!

Micro Grants & Free Resources, http://iiwomen.com ( http://iiwomen.com/New/index.htm )

Just_Margaret 5 pts

ooh, this is chock full of great links! I've only gotten to a few of them, but yay--great reading!

Thanks Suzanne. You write pretty well, for a girl. ;-)

~Margaret

Just Margaret ( http://maurhoffbarney.blogspot.com )

eilyne.davis 5 pts

When I quit my teaching job to be home with my children it was, "good for you...that's what kids in america need". Within a year I was hearing "be a good example and work". If I'm confused by the messages, imagine how confused my kids are! Thanks for the great post.

Eilyne Davis
Author: One Hundred Days Without Starbucks
http://nostarbucksfor100.blospot.com

justlinda 9 pts

I thought I was funny. Now that I know women don't have senses of humor, I'm depressed.

Add to that the fact that either being too hot or too ugly is hurting my career I just want to go lie on the couch and eat bon-bons like all the other stay-home moms do.

I didn't read all the linked content yet, but I do so very much agree with the damned if you do, damned if you don't thing.

Plus, too many of us care. I mean, if we were more likely to just accept the fact that we'll be disliked by some for whatever we do, we could probably just get on with doing it. But we care about how we're perceived. We don't want to be misunderstood or unfairly judged. (Not to mention how those inaccurate perceptions play out on our income and opportunity!) So we try really hard to set right any of the perceptions out there that are wrong.

Or maybe it's just me.

JustLinda

fabulously imperfect Nothing to See Here... Just Linda ( http://justlinda.net )

Twitter @JustLindaSTL

Suzanne 5 pts

Although of course if you do that and your kids have any issues, it is 100% your fault for being a "bad" mother and not being a better example to them by working.

Suzanne also blogs at Campaign for Unshaved Snatch (CUSS) & Other Rants ( http://cussandotherrants.com ) and is the author of Off the Beaten (Subway) Track ( http://offthebeatensubwaytrack.com ).

Suzanne 5 pts

I so hear you.

Suzanne also blogs at Campaign for Unshaved Snatch (CUSS) & Other Rants ( http://cussandotherrants.com ) and is the author of Off the Beaten (Subway) Track ( http://offthebeatensubwaytrack.com ).

Suzanne 5 pts

Also, you are a mom.

Suzanne also blogs at Campaign for Unshaved Snatch (CUSS) & Other Rants ( http://cussandotherrants.com ) and is the author of Off the Beaten (Subway) Track ( http://offthebeatensubwaytrack.com ).

Melissa Ford 5 pts

Oooh, I guess I should just curl up on a bed and quit now. Damn vagina :-)

Melissa writes Stirrup Queens ( http://stirrup-queens.com ) and Lost and Found ( http://lostandfoundandconnectionsabound.blogspot.c... ). Her book is Navigating the Land of If ( http://thelandofif.blogspot.com/ ).

totalfantasy 5 pts

Let's not forget sizeism and how it plays into hiring a woman. I was turned down for a job at a hotel because my "image" didn't "fit in"... I was about 50lbs heavier than their average young petite waif-like ladies.

On the flip side, I worked another temp job as a customer service representative for a trash company, and I was about 50lbs too light for the staff that was half scooter-bound. I also experienced their annoyance of how I was childless; I said "well, I'm only 23," and one of them said, "are you judging me because I have kids?" Which of course I wasn't!

It's frustrating how women are placed into a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation based upon looks and matronly status, whereas big fat old men can get the same jobs as "young guns". Grr.

wksocmom 5 pts

I just can't figure out if I'm too attracgtive or not attractive enough. Great stuff.

Nicole/wksocmom
Not Just A Working Mom ( http://www.notjustaworkingmom.blogspot.com )
Silicon Valley Moms ( http://www.svmoms.com )

Suzanne 5 pts

Thanks for the catch! Since other people are not as intrepid as you are in fixing broken links to get the pages, I'm going to fix them now. Eeek.

Suzanne also blogs at Campaign for Unshaved Snatch (CUSS) & Other Rants ( http://cussandotherrants.com ) and is the author of Off the Beaten (Subway) Track ( http://offthebeatensubwaytrack.com ).

Desert_Rose 5 pts

But your links don't seem to work for me. =/

Edit: I can still get the pages fixing the URLs. =]