Crazy Eyeris - Why I Plan To Be a Roller Derby Roller

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That's my Derby alter-ego. If I make the team.

I'm trying out next [this] year. Going to train and soak in as much Derby as I can in the meantime. I am beyond excited. Scared. Overwhelmed.

Overwhelmed with the support that my family has shown. I thought it was something I would want to do, but oh man, the time commitment with a young family? I don't know. When we went to our first bout, my husband and son both looked at me and said, in some sort of version, "you need to do this!"

SufferJets Ithaca by Shatterbug11

Suffer Jets via Flickr

My mother, bless her heart, said, "You need to do this. It's the OLD YOU!" And so she is buying me my first pair of skates.

And it is the old me. I used to be an athlete. Soccer in the fall. Basketball in the winter. Track in the spring. All the swimming and bike riding possible in the summer, not to mention sports camps.

I was never great at any one sport. Good, but not great. But I was proud of me, proud of what my body could do. I was not afraid of pain (physical or emotional) and I was not afraid to get hurt. Diving, sliding, hitting balls with my body, hitting people with my body, giving me the cuts, bruises, and floor burn to prove it.

But then life happened. And now I'm a different person, but the same person, desperately ready to reclaim a part of me that many people don't know anymore. Someone they never knew, but that I would like for them to love. A woman who's strength my son can admire. A woman who's strength my daughter can also achieve.

And then there is me with this very real need to move this body and feel better. So what better way to  be super motivated but the prospect of trying out for our local Derby league. Listen people, I am not capable of being a person who could just go try out without number one being in super-shape, and number two not being able to skate circles around the other "fresh meat" wannabes. Nothing personal if you not afraid to do that. In fact, I respect your fearlessness. I just can't go in not ready to roll.

The new year is here. The fitness plan is being formulated. And the only thing that will make my heart happier than training and dreaming and soaking in the support of my family and friends is being known as Crazy Eyeris next year.

Do you have a huge goal set for 2012? Is there a part of yourself you want to reclaim and have the people in your life know?

Laine blogs, podcasts, and creates awesome web art

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