I Need Some Space!

I've heard over and over again that the best way to get a well-behaved child in public is to remove her from any situation in which she is causing a ruckus.  Screaming at a restaurant.  Back to the car, possibly to drive back home.  Tossing and flopping on the beach, time to go back home, immediately.  I've never quite been able to pull this off because usually when one twin is melting down, the other is completely fine.  To take both twins outside of the area for a calm down period only serves to enrage the happy twin.  To leave the happy twin in the area (whe...more

Ruthlessness is a Virtue in Single Parenting

I have become quite ruthless since becoming a single mother with regard to cutting people out of my communications who are any kind of a drag on my energy. I am working so damn hard to get to where I want to be for myself and my children, that I cannot tolerate anyone or anything that pulls against the current. I imagine myself like a boat and when a friend or family member acts as an anchor against the direction that I am moving, I without hesitation pull out my giant knife and cut the line that ties me to that anchor....more

Teaching Manners To Children Other Than Your Own

Growing up, manners were no small joke in our household. Lessons learned that I used to find embarrassing I am grateful for today. I was taught to not only say hello to the parent of a friend I was calling on the telephone but announce who I was. Friends who called me on the phone and gave the usual, "Is Reedu there?" were answered by my mom with a "Yes," and a dial tone....more
I would greatly appreciate it if the village helped me to teach good manners to my children. If ...more

Time Out or Discipline

I just love this photo … As much as we may not want to admit it; there truly is a little bugger and devil in all children. It does not matter how cute and adorable we think they may be at the time because it is important to remember that discipline is so very important when raising children and a child's unacceptable behavior can get out of hand very quickly when it is ignored and not addressed immediately....more

No Thanks! (I'd rather not deal with challenging behavior.)

We are dealing with some challenging behaviors at home to say the least.   Our soon to be three-year-old has decided he’d like to find out what happens when we count to 3.  I suppose he really enjoys this scenario because we have had to relive it over and over and over.  He finds out that he is sent to his room for a time out.  Instead of going up there to SUFFER, he probably plays to his heart’s content, but who am I to actually think that parents have an upper hand when disciplining?  ...more

Why This Chinese Mom Chose to Evolve - Huffington Post Response

Wow.  822 tweets.  322 Facebook Likes.  105 FB shares....more

I Will Die on Every Hill

The moment you start fighting with a toddler, you have already lost.  Everyone loses, but the parent especially.  The main problem is that a toddler will treat every minor infraction with the same amount of vigor.  It doesn't matter if they have just broken their leg or if you gave them cheerios in the wrong bowl.  When your toddler has the fighting spirit, nothing can stop them.  So the question is, how hard should we try?  Read More:...more

from the belly: my child dances on tables

 my child dances on tables. with toe tapping, heart melting, jazz hands to boot.and it's the cutest thing i've ever seen.the dad and i thought this would be ourfirst chance at discipline ::said with a brave voice and a raised fist::but really it's become a highlight of our day.we sit back on tired hineys and watch our little creation dance to his heart's content. well, we try not to watch directly.you see, not making eye contact is the only form of discipline we use for this misbehavior....more

Mercy and Grace

Mercy: Not getting the punishment you deserveGrace: Getting something good you do not deserveMy MOPS meeting last week had a large impact on my mothering. The speaker gave so much practical advice and words of wisdom that I am still processing it.She didn't come armed with only her own wisdom, but she asked her friends for their wisdom as well. She said the responses were from women ranging in age from the early 20's to the late 80's. One of the ladies gave this advise: have boundaries cloaked in grace....more

Sibbling Squabbles

Sibling Squabbles My kids are starting to fight with each other. It is usually the older one taking something from the younger one....more