BlogHer - Bringing My "A" Game - Comments

Women are amazing

Chantel Williams — Thu, 28 Sep 2006 00:09:49 -0500

No matter where we are or what we do most of us make choices based upon what our heart tells us. We've got a good head on our shoulders but i'm more impressed with the capacity of our hearts.

Chantel Williams
BlogHer Life Contributing Editor
http://www.lifeandtimesofchantel.com

This motivated me...

Lisa Stone — Wed, 27 Sep 2006 20:51:57 -0500

Chantel I'm struck by this sentence of yours:

My â€œAâ€ game has more to do with living my life than it does starting a business or a new job it has to do with eating healthy, getting in shape and really being the person I want to be. It has to do with being that person today not wanting to be that person in the future.

So -- living today as Chantel, rather than Chantel's to-do list. Your choice sounds infinitely braver -- and like very good advice that I personally need to think hard about!

Your words also remind me of something I heard yesterday when I attended the California Gorvernor and First Lady's Conference on Women. Maria Shriver (member of the Kennedy dynasty, married to California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger) got up on stage and talked about the preceeding 12 months. I'm paraphrasing, but she essentially described it as one of the hardest years of her life - her mother had a stroke in her arms, Shriver faced the reality of that she's not returning to the network new anchor job she lost because of her husband's job, her babies grew up into not-so-adorable teens and didn't need her, she turnsed 50 and...lost her identity. In a talk that was self-deprecating and sometimes cringingly honest she told an arena of 11,000 women:

"I had to stop running around and behaving like a lunatic...I had to stop trying to control everything. For the first time this woman decided to stand still. I decided to turn down the volume so I could turn up the silence and hear my own voice. Our voices are different at 20, 30, 40, 50. And that's okay."

She told about 20 more anecdotes I couldn't scribble fast enough to catch (I'm no longer analog) and then closed with, "I slowed down long enough to meet people and listen to them. I slowed down enough to listen to my voice and know that it's in my heart, not in my head."

Lisa Stone
BlogHer Co-founder
Surfette

Square pegs in round holes

Annie Dennison — Wed, 27 Sep 2006 18:55:35 -0500

In the last couple of weeks it got clear in my work that I was trying way too hard to pound some square pegs into round holes. But it sure felt good when I finally stopped pounding!

Congrats on the job offer. Hope it's a round peg in a round hole kind of fit for you.

Motivation...

Robin Ogden — Wed, 27 Sep 2006 18:35:19 -0500

Hello Chantel -

Wonderful comments about your "A" game and bringing it on in your life. It was also good to read that after a series rigorous interviewing you were offered a position. I hope the position is something that really matches up with you and what you love to do. So many times we are unaware of what that really is and then we end up feeling so lost in what we are doing. It's like being at an intersection and not knowing which way to turn. I recently came across a woman who developed a wonderful program called Career Clarity - very impressive. Her name is Carol McClelland and she specializes in helping people who are facing new directions and transitions. She also wrote a book called Seasons of Change. You might want to take a look at her site www.transitiondynamics.com.

Anyway, good luck to you in your new position!

Robin

Bringing My "A" Game

Chantel Williams — Wed, 27 Sep 2006 17:36:56 -0500

The last few weeks have been a lesson in what Iâ€™m willing to give and what Iâ€™m willing to change. My life has been a lesson in lessons. I have no time to be a victim I only have time to change, to give and to move on.

Iâ€™ve always been goal oriented but over the last two months Iâ€™ve been slacking. Iâ€™ve skated in and out of work, Iâ€™ve barely done any work rewriting of the book and I havenâ€™t even considered finishing my very last quarter of school. This of course could be a symptom of burn-out but it could also be a symptom of trying to pound square pegs into round holes for too long. Whatever the cause of this slump I realized to get out of it will require me to start showing up with my â€œAâ€ game.

I was so inspired by the Blogher Conference that I thought I could use a bit of a spiritual tune-up. Last Friday I attended a womenâ€™s conference, Ladies Who Launch. While I had no plans to launch a traditional home or retail start-up Iâ€™m constantly hatching plans to launch me. This type of networking is exactly the network you need if you feeling stuck or uninspired. The ideas that flowed from the speakers are practical and doable. These are every day women who didnâ€™t start with a large amount of money or even a business plan. These were women who were motivated and I imagine these were women who bring their â€œAâ€ game with them every day.

I listened as Lisa Johnson of Reach Group Consulting plugged Blogher.org as a place where women can not only connect with each other but create community as well. Lisaâ€™s brand philosophy is build community, commerce and content. She believes the internet and communities like Blogher can help women become more successful with their businesses because women will share the secrets of their success just for the asking. For me that was an â€œAâ€ game philosophy that I can understand. My â€œAâ€ game has more to do with living my life than it does starting a business or a new job it has to do with eating healthy, getting in shape and really being the person I want to be. It has to do with being that person today not waiting to be that person in the future.

Itâ€™s because of this philosophy of women mentoring each other that Iâ€™ve come this far. I know that I actually have an â€œAâ€ game, I know that I am loved, Iâ€™m smart and yes for as clichÃ© as it sounds; people like me. Iâ€™ve been interviewing for a new job. The interview process has been the most rigorous I have ever experienced. After five interviews I relied heavily on the women in my life for support and the strength to keep going through the process. During our sixth meeting they finally offered me the job. I guess its time for me to bring my â€œAâ€ game starting now.

How do you get motivated?

Contributing Editor, Chantel Williams also blogs at Life and Times of Chantel