BlogHer - In five years - Comments

Courage and Humanity

Lia — Wed, 18 Apr 2007 01:25:02 -0500

Bravo for cutting through that need for a 5-year plan. It is just a ridiculous that we continually feel the compunction to present a facade of knowing all the answers to those around us.
In our society, success if often measured by our degree of happiness: when we are healthy, beautiful, wealthy, much sought after or desired, possessing a large portion of gumption, and a brave heart. A state of being some portray masterfully, if not superficially. So, if your life is riddled with uncertainty, crisis, worry, and bouts of fear, you are obviously not upholding the image of success. This is completely crazy though. I learn more about courage and humanity by reading a post like this one, then all the advice columns of life gurus.

lia from luebeck, germany

Author of the media safe 101 page on the Red Tent Blog and the personal yum yum cafe

You're welcome

HeatherB — Tue, 17 Apr 2007 14:00:36 -0500

Thanks for the compliments. It's so true, everyone wants to know where you see yourself in five years and I'm just like I see myself happy with whatever I'm doing. I'd like to just get up in the morning and be excited to go to work whatever it may be.

Heather B.
Personal Blog: No Pasa Nada
BlogHer CE: Business, Career & Personal Finance
An

That is so true

Marie D. — Tue, 17 Apr 2007 11:58:21 -0500

Hi Heather,

I have enjoyed reading your posts for a while but have not commented so far.
I do relate to this article because I've been looking for a new job these last weeks after having lost mine, and I have heard this "5 years" questions so many times in a few weeks... when all I need to know is how I am going to pay the bills next month if I stay unemployed.
I didn't want to think about those long-term things before, and I do even less now - curling up in fetal position is much more appealing to me right now!

Thanks for this great post.

Marie D.

In five years

HeatherB — Tue, 17 Apr 2007 10:17:38 -0500

Ages ago during my daily blog perusal, I came across this entry by Jo. Jo lives in DC, comes to Happy Hours, speaks Spanish, and admired my ass in my Lucky Brands. Therefore I love Jo. But what really drew me to her writing and actually forced me to squeal in delight at seeing her was this paragraph:

Instead, I drove back to my apartment wishing I could go back home. Back home to a time where things weren't so complicated; when mailing the rent check that eats up 50% of my monthly salary didn't make me hyperventilate every month; when taxes and insurance and car titles didn't cause a week long argument with my mom; when getting married and having kids seemed so far away and when thinking about "what I want to do with my life" didn't cause me to bite my nails down to nothing.

It resonated with me. Deeply resonated to my very core, because YES! She gets it. Itâ€™s how Iâ€™ve been feeling almost everyday for the past two years and even more so over the past three months. Iâ€™m growing weary of the responsibility and the decisions that need to be made and how much money is where and since when was â€œSo where do you see yourself in five years?â€ the standard question after â€œHow are you?â€ While weâ€™re at it, would it be that irrational of me to say â€œGee, I donâ€™t know but I do have these crazy flip cup skills, so if that leads to any sort of future, sign me up.â€

I want to say I donâ€™t know. Iâ€™d like to not freak out and remove my cuticles and lay awake until one AM think and rethinking what exactly it is that I want with my future. I donâ€™t want pro and con lists and for once Iâ€™d just really like it if I could curl up in the fetal position on my half busted bed with a glass of Prosecco and have someone else answer the â€œso what do you want to do?â€ question. I just want to stop for three minutes and really, I donâ€™t recall signing up for this much responsibility and to make such massive career choices.

But in the end it comes down to this:

I realized that magic didn't work anymore a long time ago and yet it still hurts. I get up every day and go to work, pay my bills, clean the apartment, take care of all my responsibilities.

As much as Iâ€™d love to take a whirl in a DeLorean time machine, I know that in the end that is just so not a possibility. So I go on: I acquiesce to my new fate in life of being responsible, I make a pro and con list and I sit and really ponder where I really want to be in five years
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BlogHer CE, Heather B, also blogs at No Pasa Nada