The Game of Lice

abswyg — Sun, 16 Sep 2007 15:36:21 -0500

Jill over at Writes Like She Talks asked me a very important and profound question a few weeks ago -- what is the conventional wisdom on why God invented lice?

I've been pondering this very question these past two weeks as we've waged our third battle against these relentless vermin this summer. The only purpose for lice that I can think of is that it teaches us a lesson that is as important and profound as Jill's question itself. Things can always get worse.

I've had alot of time to ponder many things as I've spent hours on end sifting through my daughter's thick curly locks, picking nits off her head. Aside from lamenting the missed Rosh Hashanah services and play dates as a result of this undeserved plague and wondering how my daughter might look bald (she has a pretty face!), I've mostly been asking myself why I've been so utterly unprepared for motherhood.

I always feel like I missed a course in high school or college or something. Other than my own parents' experience (and who actually pays attention to them?), the only thing that gave me a glimpse into the "real" world while I was growing up was Habro's "The Game of Life." Remember that game? The one where you sent your car along the road of life and along the way you got a job, got married, had kids, bought insurance and stocks? Sometimes you even defaulted on loans, lost out on the stock market or got hit by a hurricane. I just loved that game!

But thinking back on it, maybe that game was a bit superficial. If I was revamping it today, I'd add a few more "real" life experiences. Like, "Your daughter has lice. Loose two turns as you delouse your children and your house." Or, "Your daughter wants dance lessons. Pay $200 dollars for the lessons and $200 more for ballet shoes and recital costumes." Or, "Oops! Your baby spit up on your expensive wool suit. Pay $100 in dry cleaning!" Then maybe kids would grow up a bit more prepared for the real world.

Here's a fun game...what "real" life experiences would you add to "The Game of Life?"

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The Game of Lice