BlogHer - Moving Across the Country: Handling the Shock - Comments

It depends

Denise — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 06:38:53 -0500

It depends on the size of your UHaul. You can call the UHaul folks and ask them how big the tank is for your truck. Then, look at the estimated mpg for the truck you've rented. Estimate low but not too low.

We drove the largest truck UHaul sells 1200 miles and got between 8-10 mpg, which was better than I expected. It still cost a lot of money for gas, $100-150 every time we stopped, but we budgeted for it and it was fine.

Good luck, and don't worry. It will all work out fine but please come back and tell me about the experience. :-)

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings

moving across country

Mrs Rand — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 01:49:57 -0500

It's nice to see that others have also went through this process. I just married a man who is in the military a couple of months ago. I am currently living in San Francisco, CA however I am going to be moving to Virginia Beach, VA in a month and a few days. We are going to be driving all of my belongings in a uhaul type truck and towing my car as well. One thing I am somewhat afraid of is just having to fill up gas many many times and not really knowing how much to expect to spend. Anyone have any ideas on this?

Mrs Rand

make it an adventure

Tre — Sat, 24 May 2008 13:45:46 -0500

Hey Denise....

First, I think you'll love Chicago.

I've visited it several times and then lived there last fall for 6 mos (never left after blogher actually).

As a single woman writer, I adored the creativity and venues for public self expression..there are countless avenues to pursue to go hear others' or promote yourself....You will enjoy that aspect I"m sure...

As for reacclimating ....it's an opportunity for your family/children to get their arms around how our 'selves' go with us wherever we do...and while meeting new friends and getting used to things is sometimes hard at first....it's doable and inevitable...

In all my moves, I've learned that the constants that stay with us: our love for ourselves and one another, the things that make us feel safe and secure...we take anywhere.

I'm right now in Dallas helping my sister move. Her only regret is all the things she thought she'd do in this home. So it's upped the ante on things that are really goals that she wants to stop 'waiting' to start striving toward accomplishing...

You may even find that you'll learn more about your own goals and your children will too....

What a beautiful place to be resettling to.

Can't wait to hear about it...

Meanwhile, patience helps..and flexibility....and being able to just develop a sense of routine amidst all the chaos.

Have fun. And make it fun. Maybe video the packing process and have one of your kiddos blog about it :)

Enjoy...Tre~

It seemed tough back then,

Dana J. Tuszke — Fri, 09 May 2008 10:58:29 -0500

It seemed tough back then, but looking back now I realize the amount of trust he had in me, and the value of the responsibility he gave me. I didn't realize he was grooming me to be self-efficient and he taught me the importance of hard work.

I can't say I'd want to do that again, but I appreciate what he taught me. Like plumbing and painting and how to use a caulk gun. ;)

Do you have friends/family in the Chicagoland area? Are you and the fam moving to the great unknown? I think it's exciting, despite all the stress that it may bring on. Hang in there! :)

(I'm only four hours north of Chi-Town and try to make my annual pilgrimmage to visit family and friends. It's a great city. Lots to do and see.)

Packing in advance

MMarquit — Thu, 08 May 2008 20:38:33 -0500

When we moved from Utah to New York, then New York back to Utah (husband was looking for a program he liked at university), we started packing EARLY. Because, unlike our in-town moves over the years, we couldn't make multiple trips for stuff. I started putting the non-essentials in boxes about two months ahead of time, and every night packed three or four boxes. It really took some of the stress away.

We also liked using ABF. You pack up a truck, and they drive your stuff. They were honest both times we used them, and things worked beautifully. And we didn't have to worry about driving the truck. Which can be a real pain. Instead, we were free to site see along the way, and we didn't have to worry about finding parking spaces at the hotels.

One nice thing about moving is that we always get rid of stuff we don't need. We donate it to the thrift shop or sell it. Leaves more room in the new house :)

Good luck with your move!

I Have Good News And Bad News

Megan Smith — Thu, 08 May 2008 20:33:48 -0500

The bad news is you'll be closer to Oprah.

The good news is you'll be able to get me tickets! :)

As far as house hunting, I second the fireplace suggestion and I'm a big fan of porches.

Good luck!

Megan
BlogHer Contributing Editor, TV/YouTube
Megan's Minute
Video Runway

^.^

HelterSkelter — Thu, 08 May 2008 19:17:18 -0500

Thanks for remembering too! Great!

It was the A, B, C thing

Denise — Thu, 08 May 2008 16:18:02 -0500

I have experienced that military moving company dance many many times.

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings

Wow!

MommaMary — Thu, 08 May 2008 16:16:04 -0500

Thanks for remembering! I barely remembered that one, and I had to go back and double check to make sure I didn't leave any typos in it!

It was funny

Denise — Thu, 08 May 2008 16:11:35 -0500

I remembered your post from all that time ago, so when I went to write mine today - I had to track that down. I was feeling all of that move stuff with you, I really was.

:-)

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings

Love is a strong word, heh

Denise — Thu, 08 May 2008 16:09:29 -0500

We were lucky enough to attend BlogHerCon last summer in Chicago with Michelle and Prince J - he loved it, she didn't. He had a blast at Navy Pier, she didn't. She enjoyed the shopping, he didn't but he did appreciate the Apple store, lol. (We don't have one here.)

There really are many, many things to do in the area and we're working very hard to spin that positively. One small problem - the younger children are very well traveled and museums are boring - but that's another story entirely.

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings

Thanks Lara

Denise — Thu, 08 May 2008 16:06:39 -0500

Fireplace, check!

Bikes errr no, I have a bike issue but bike paths make me happy and I was pleasantly surprised by all of the ones I've seen in the area we will be living.

We are trying very hard to get rid of stuff and start fresh - it's hard because we have a lot of family pieces that someone does not want to let go of. (that someone is not me)

I really prefer moving with babies and toddlers - moving with middle schoolers and high schoolers is a nightmare but we will all survive and I'm sure the kids will grow into their new environment. The younger ones do not remember Michelle's angst about Florida and that angst was HUGE. So she's a good role model for them - she hated that first year (or two) and now she loves it here.

I hope to see you in person some time soon!

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings

Yeah for getting to unpack and re-nest!

MommaMary — Thu, 08 May 2008 15:37:01 -0500

BOOO for packing and loading and lifting and all of the crap that goes along with moving.

I agree about winter! Just stay home. :-) That's what I did, although I blamed it on the fact that I didn't want to take the baby out in the cold. Brrrrrrr I am longing for some HEAT, and somehow, I just don't think it's going to happen on the CA Central Coast!

Thanks for linking me though! And good luck with the move!

Chicago is a great town!!

Asianmommy — Thu, 08 May 2008 15:36:02 -0500

I understand how awful it is to have to move. We've done it 5 times in the past 11 years. Hopefully the last time was 5 months ago. We still haven't finished unpacking yet! But, I did want to say: Welcome to Chicago!! It's a great place to live. My husband & I both grew up here and decided to move back to raise our kids here. The public school system in the suburbs is excellent. There are lots of fun things to do with the kids: Shedd Aquarium, Morton Arboretum, Field Museum, Museum of Science & Industry, Adler Planetarium, Art Institute of Chicago. Navy Pier has a giant ferris wheel and the Chicago Children's Museum. In the summertime, they show fireworks at Navy Pier twice a week and have free outdoor concerts at Millenium Park. In the winter, there's Winter Wonderfest at Navy Pier and the Magnificent Mile is filled with lights. You'll love it!

Welcome to Chicago!

Laracolvin — Thu, 08 May 2008 15:33:11 -0500

Congratulations! I moved to Chicago last summer, and my family loves it here! Granted, we were in the Midwest to start already, but I cannot say enough good things about my new town.

Moving advice (because we sold everything and just started from scratch):

1. Get a place with a fireplace! Winters are cold - but beautiful and cozy and tolerable with a fireplace!

2. Bring your bikes; the Lakeshore/Lincoln Park bike paths are a lot of fun!

3. Research schools EARLY! If you live in the city, the school system is quite a maze.

4. Just go with it! We were flying by the seat or our pants most of the time and still survived.

5. Kids WILL acclimate...eventually. Our three year old had quite a time of it. I think it was around the holidays and New YEars when she finally settled in.

My husband and I were both surprised at how soon we felt Chicago was our home. I hope your family feels the same way!

Lara

Notions of Identity

Moving Across the Country: Handling the Shock

Denise — Thu, 08 May 2008 09:07:11 -0500

I'm moving. Err, we're moving. My family is moving. Most of my family is moving. Argh, it's complicated so I'll explain.

About six months ago, I started leaving comments on some forum posts and blog posts suggesting we were "considering a move to the Chicago area" and looked for Chicago area bloggers to add to my feedreader. A couple of months later, that "considering" thing changed to something that seemed more real, so the children were told.

Jenn, she's 24, and lives in SC so this move effects her only because we'll be further away and a weekend visit is a lot more expensive. She was shocked. "It's cold there. And smoggy."

Chris, he's 21, and lives in a little duplex across town so this move effects him only because I'm not 10 minutes away to borrow money, get free food or more importantly - use the washer and dryer. Also, he considered moving along with us - which was interesting and odd.

Michelle, she's 18, and her initial reaction was "I am not moving to Chicago." From there, her decisions about college were colored by the fact that we would not be here, in Gainesville. Basically, when we talked about moving - she blocked us out.

Prince J, he's 14, and he didn't care strongly one way or the other. As long as he has his tablet PC and his video games, he's fine. He has no deep or close personal ties to friends at school.

RJ, she's 12, and she was crushed. Let's just call it what it is. Crushed. Her friendships are close and deep and, she's of the age when friendships are huge.

Liz, she's 9, and she was angry about moving. Friends, school, synchronized swimming and "home" - how dare we?!

Moving your family is hard. I know. I spent more than 20 years married to someone in the military. The older children have moved and moved and moved again. But they (and I) got used to NOT moving when the military tells you to. The younger children don't have that moving experience. It's hard.

A couple more months have gone by since the children were told of the possibility of moving to the Chicago area. The possibility is now reality - and they're adjusting. They know it's going to happen, those who didn't like the idea at first still don't like the idea but the raw emotions aren't so raw. Except when they bubble to the surface, and they do.

It's hard and it's going to be a long time before anything feels easy.

Here are some bloggers who are going through some of this same hard stuff.

* Rachelle helps her daughter handle her anger.

* Sunshine at Raw Life is moving to a new home and her son is struggling with this move.

* Oh look, another family is moving to Chicago.

Stay tuned as I rant, er ramble, about house hunting, packing more junk than any family should be allowed to have and everything else related to moving. Please, share your personal moving experiences - good and bad - it helps.

~~Denise
Flamingo House Happenings