BlogHer - Feminism setting us back? - Comments

The good old days weren't always good...

Kim Pearson — Wed, 14 May 2008 20:36:40 -0500

and tomorrow ain't as bad as it seems...

There are a lot of reason's for today's divorce rate, including the fact that people live longer, at least among the middle classes. In my grandmother's day, a lot more women died in childbirth, for example. And yes, both men and women had fewer options.

It's also important to remember how few rights women had. According to a law review article by Prof. Linda Ammons that I referred to in this 2006 post, some states didn't allow women on juries until the mid-1950s, and until the 1970s, a man who could get away with killing his wife if he said he did it because he caught her committing adultery. Let's not even talk about the routine indignities -- the assumption that you don't know how to buy or use a tool, much less a car, stock or house. Let's not even talk about the over-prescribing of addictive drugs because women's health complaints weren't taken seriously and the failure to even do medical research on illnesses that are most likely to be contracted by women. Sexual harassment wasn't even illegal before 1986, if I remember correctly.

Finally, let's not forget that there are male feminists who are doing amazing work on the toll that patriarchy takes on men. Filmmaker Byron Hurt's work is a profound example. Mark Anthony Neal has been a prominent critic of misogyny in popular culture. Without the feminist movement, we would not have the the White Ribbon campaign, an organization of men working against domestic violence.

The feminist movement often falls short and certainly has had unintended consequences. However, there is no question that it has been essential to human progress.

Kim
BlogHer Contributing Editor|Professor Kim|

Not "either-or"

Yvette Perry — Wed, 14 May 2008 16:44:09 -0500

Were the feminist movement and feminist ideas a good thing for women or were they a double-edged sword?

I say both things are true: THe feminist movement has been good for women (and men) AND this movement--like all social movements--has had good and bad consequences. Some of the "Bad"? Backlash, role ambiguity, rifts within the movement, some loss of "womens cultural" spaces and rituals, greater exposures to previously more male-prevalent illnesses...

But the idea IMO should be to find ways to deal with these challenges rather than go back to some mythical golden age when all was well prior to feminist movements.

Six Impossible Things Before Breakfast

What's good for men about feminism...

Liz Rizzo — Wed, 14 May 2008 16:41:20 -0500

Well, many things.

But in terms of this post, there was this false construct before that women care about marriage and children and they had to "trap" a man, because men just want to be free.

Meanwhile, of course many men do really want marriage and children. In today's world, they're learning that they need to own their true desires - Because if they play cool there's a strong chance that there won't be any women around remotely interested in "trapping" them.

Liz Rizzo

I blog at Everyday Goddess.

The feminist movement has only been good

Trisha — Wed, 14 May 2008 15:37:31 -0500

People stayed married back then because they didn't have a choice. Even if their husband was abusive - what could they do? Most wouldn't have had enough education to support themselves or their kids.

The feminist movement has only been good - for women anyway. Men may not see it that way. They no longer have wives they can treat any way they want to and who will just stay and take it because they have no choice.

My blog is lonely and cries at night - please visit and say 'Hello!' : Ideas For Women blog

There's A Problem With That Argument

Megan Smith — Wed, 14 May 2008 10:02:34 -0500

Hi Steph,

I think the problem with that argument is that all the responsibility for the success or failure of a marriage is put solely on the woman.

How many women of our grandmother's generation might have dumped cheating husbands if they had had more choices? Because they didn't have many choices, they often stuck it out and were miserable.

I prefer that women have choices. I think one reason---of the many that exist---so many marriages fail is because men are having a tough time dealing with modern women. I think many of them feel very threatened by women who have a variety of choices in their lives.

Megan
BlogHer Contributing Editor, TV/YouTube
Megan's Minute
Video Runway

Feminism setting us back?

stephA — Tue, 13 May 2008 22:03:32 -0500

I was having a conversation with a group of friends today and the topic of feminism came up. We began to talk about anti-feminists who believe in a patriarchic society. One of my friends mentioned that maybe society is the way that it is because of the feminist movement. This got me to thinking. My grandmother once told me that the divorce rates are so high nowadays because people (particularly women) are not willing to stick through a marriage through good and bad times. So, I started thinking, did the women in my grandmother's generation only stick with their marriage because they didn't have any other choice? Have divorce rates sky-rocketed because women feel too empowered to deal with the problems? Were the feminist movement and feminist ideas a good thing for women or were they a double-edged sword?