BlogHer - sexuality - Comments

Thanks, Tara

Bill Cammack — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 16:30:32 -0600

Thanks, Tara. I appreciate your comment. :)

I don't post here or anywhere else (inlcuding my own blog) to receive agreement, or friendship or credit or about a million other things, but the thing that means the most to me is that people open their minds to the possibilities in life. It might not be a PROBABILITY or relevant in their own lives, but in most cases, I just want people to be able to see things from a different perspective and then think about it and come to their own conclusions... including "Bill doesn't know WTF he's talking about!" :D

I get a lot of insight here that otherwise would have been missing from my database of possibilities. My goal is to give back and hopefully present a different view, even if it's a disliked view, because not everyone thinks the same way and not everyone acts the same way and even the people that act the same way do so based on different motivations, so instead of adding more "Buy your girlfriend flowers and agree with everything she says" garbage to the pile, I'd rather post something that might spark thought & debate, leading to people either changing their minds or solidifying their position that they're right about what's going on in their lives.

Cheers! :D

~ Bill
I blog at billcammack.com

Dear Bill

tarawhitneysims — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 16:22:03 -0600

Even if I don't agree with your opinions. I truly respect your thoughts. You get me thinking.

We both do and know. No

anaesthetic — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 02:03:57 -0600

We both do and know. No problem. End of story.

Coming Out or Not

goddessdreams — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 12:49:48 -0500

I may have no right to speak in this conversation--I prefer men. I've never been sexual with a woman. I have male and female friends of various sexual persuasions. One of my children is transgendered male to female and pre-op.

This post and the comments brought to mind my dear friend who passed away in 2006. She was by anyone's account a successful woman--a beloved clergymember respected by her colleagues, a published author, and social justice activitist. She was a gifted artist that created beauty from textiles and papers. This woman gave me safe space to express my heart's desire. She was one of the most open-hearted people I ever knew. She held hope for humanity and the world is poorer for her not being in it now.

In spite of all the wonderful traits she possessed, she could not find the compassion she needed to have for herself. It was on her death bed that she told me what she could not tell others--that she was bi-sexual. She lived her whole life without being able to openly express this heart of who she was. To me that is a deep tragedy. I ached for her.

How many others have been stuffed into dark corners and closets by intolerance, arrogance, and ignorance? We are all cut from the same cloth; it doesn't matter what pattern we take, what shape and color we are.

Don’t mind the destination, don’t mind the end. Learn from the past, but grab hold of now. Now is always evolving. ~Rumi

It shouldn't matter

orlapeters — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 10:35:38 -0500

In today's society it actually shouldn't matter what people's sexual preference is.

I work with gay people of both sexes. I'm fine with it. There are times when a gay female is very agressive and it becomes more than something I can brush off, but apart from that, I'm pretty much ok with it.

I know that the reality is far from where it all should be, but those are the conditions we have to live under. We just got to get on with things and do what we can.

Straight, Gay or Bi, it shouldn't make a difference. As long as we do what we're meant to do and respect other people's values, then it's ok in my book.

Orla

Product Launch Manager

An Interesting Spin

cluelesscrafter — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 14:34:08 -0500

What an amazing piece of writing. My eyes, mind, and heart just flooded with visions, thought and emotions. I have only taken the concept of underwear as none other than an aesthetic trifle that has little to do with the state of a lovelife, but your personification of this inanimate object changed me forever. I'm sitting on this thought for a while.

http://www.thecluelesscrafter.com/

yes, all three

alyssaroyse — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 14:18:11 -0500

Yes, I did ask all three. I think that bits of margarita came shooting out his nose! (And it's been fabulous ever since!) In my "old age" directness and satisfaction are everything!

____________

Alyssa Royse

Just Cause It: A Web Site To Save The World

READ the magazine http://www.zinio.com/justcause

Looking at underwear

Julie Heinrich — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 13:01:17 -0500

This post made me look at underwear, both mine and my husbands, in a whole new way. And I like the new way that I am looking at things. Funny thing about turning 40 (which I did this summer), I have been looking back and looking forward and generally evaluating my life.

I know that this post was written last December. So I am assuming that your divorce is done and hoping you have gone on your first post-divorce date. Did you indeed ask him the three questions you outlined above? How did that turn out? (Feel free to tell me if I am too prying)

Hmmm...

Tina Lane — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 08:26:25 -0500

The double standard rears its ugly little head. Again. While I do recognize that there are different ways that men and women like to be courted, and the whole mars and venus bit of it all, I do dislike the short end of the stick. www.floridagirlmidwest.blogspot.com

So did Audrey

sassymonkey — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 13:22:26 -0500

So is the point that we're supposed to have affairs with married men?

Catchy title though.

Sassymonkey and Sassymonkey Reads.

Ugh.

Elisa Camahort — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 12:59:28 -0500

I agree with you. Just another spin on "The Rules".

BTW: Wasn't Kate Hepburn totally scandalous for having a long affair with married man, Spencer Tracy.

I mean, seriously.

Elisa Camahort Page
BlogHer
elisa@blogher.com

My BlogHer profile truly shows you everything I do online...Check it out!!

Talking about it

RockinRobyn — Sun, 02 Aug 2009 02:27:48 -0500

My boyfriend and I have always been really open with each other about sex, and that includes masturbation. Although I've never seen him do it, or vice versa, we both talk about it, and pretty casually at that. We don't live together at this point, so the "watching" aspect may change in the future.

To be honest, he's the one that really helped me feel comfortable with it. I used to be really ashamed of the fact that I would masturbate, but we both understand it's normal and acceptable within our relationship, so our conversations about it have never turned awkward. He actually texted me the other day to tell me he missed me...and that his wrist hurt.

"Love is the greatest power, but no one has yet figured out how to put it into a bomb." --Ashleigh Brilliant

My partner doesn't know, and

aj_baluyut — Sun, 02 Aug 2009 01:23:42 -0500

My partner doesn't know, and I'm shy to let him know about it, you know for the female masturbation it seems like a bigger issue, more personal, whereas for the male it really is just objects, and unemotional.

Good timing!

Ginger Leigh — Mon, 20 Jul 2009 13:49:58 -0500

So glad i found this. I was just having this conversation with a bunch of friends this past weekend. Was so sad to hear someone i thought was pretty progressive say they would feel like they weren't satisfying their partner if they masturbate. How ridiculous!

Relationship Blogging

evelopez — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 19:19:21 -0500

I think that long-time bloggers are at greater risk for going overboard than new bloggers, who tend to either blog privately or only let a few of their friends know. But when your whole professional life is on a blog, it's had to know when to draw the line.

Personally, I don't ever want any of my exes thinking that I still even give them a moment's passing thought.

I run a blog at http://freeadviceforwomen.com.