BlogHer - summer vacation - Comments

Needed Validation

jheat — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 19:58:46 -0500

Thanks for this post. I only wish I'd found it before I left for my own ambivalent vacation!

Thank you for your comment,

themommy — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 12:11:06 -0500

Thank you for your comment, Dgray. I'm sorry that you struggle a bit with your daughter in law. I have a hard time with my sister in law in just about the same fashion. She doesn't have any children, so she doesn't have any experience to draw from when she promises my children things. (And some of the things she promises are absolutely outrageous, by the way). I do hope that your relationship with your DIL blossoms and grows, and that the two of you can work out your communication with the children together. I'm sure she'll learn from you, as you sound like an awesome example for a young mother.

My Blog: Impacting the Earth little, my children much.
http://www.yourimpactmatters.com

Trading Surprises In

dgray1101 — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 19:27:52 -0500

I agree whole heartedly with your perspective to surprise rather than promise. I was raised this way, and only found out as a young mother when my Mom recommended to me to stop making promises I may not be able to keep and rather, surprise them when it all comes together.

I then found myself running head on into my daughter in law telling the kids as fact anything and everything she and I discussed as ideas, and then pointing out that I "never do what you promise". I hadn't realized she was still in that mode. I tried to add her to the list of people I would have to surprise, but it didn't go well turning instead into cajoling and confrontation on her part. I landed somewhere in between by sharing only need to know information leaving me room for the adult issues we all realize are around the corner, but being able to prepare her for "something".

Watching my mouth

rebellious thinker — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 11:37:39 -0500

Well, my babies are 17 and 12, and they still like to interpret "maybe" as "yes." On one hand it's good since, I guess, I generally do what I say I might do; on the other hand, the pressure is on me. But yes, it is definitely good to make sure expecations are not too high, but, hey, they need to know that life has its uncertainties.

Laura, www.RebelliousThoughtsofaWoman.com

I have had the same experience with Maybe

themommy — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 08:38:50 -0500

When they were younger, my children were the same. They didn't at all understand the word "maybe". I've learned to just say that it would be nice to do something like that, and we can try, but you never know how our life could change between now and then. Even though it takes a little time, it's healthy to teach them that plans can change.

My Blog: Impacting the Earth little, my children much.
http://www.yourimpactmatters.com

Perspective and Interpretation

rebellious thinker — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 07:30:23 -0500

This was a big thing and a big disappointment. Sorry for your kids

I have found that I try not to promise anything; I am always premising things with MAYBE. That is my key word. But my daughters don't seem to hear it--ever. It's always you SAID and you PROMISED. So as much as I try not to promise because I know circumstances change, they don't hear it like that, and that is something that cannot be avoived. We all hear what we want to hear. Even, especially, our children.

Laura, www.RebelliousThoughtsofaWoman.com

Boycott the Staycation!

Jen M. — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 15:38:40 -0500

I'm with Laurie -the media-invented word "Staycation" sets my teeth on edge. Travel is so important - it widens our worldview and provides for lifelong memrories that a daily grande latte at Starbucks cannot - that trimming budgets in other areas and paring down vacation plans to take any trip at all is my priority. Sorry, Starbucks!

That's why TravelingMamas.com (I'm MudslideMama) is throwing a summer long party, themed "Boycott the Staycation." There are giveaways, tips for budgeting travel, and ideas for making the most of nearby destinations. For example, those of you up in San Fran don't have to take out a second mortgage for a vacation in Tuscany, when Napa Valley is so close, and a really great substitute.

I guess what I'm saying, Pam, is that everyone knows times are tough, and I sure couldn't afford to go to Paris this summer or anything fancy like that, but travel/seeing the world is part of who I am. Much more so than daily visits to overpriced coffee shops! :)

My Travel Site

Wait, I was on Giglio a few

chandi — Sun, 29 Jun 2008 12:50:35 -0500

Wait, I was on Giglio a few years ago and loved it. What's happening there? I don't see the report you're talking about. YIKES! SLOW DOWN DEVELOPMENT!

Make it a priority

Hulakitty — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 16:01:39 -0500

I went to Europe last summer. I did careful research and used my flier miles. It's a choice. My car is paid for and I skimp on other things. I only splured once in a while over there and took the public transport and tours. Check out my travel blog http://travelingwithtricia.blogspot.com/ I will be going back this summer shooting portaits for US visitors over in Paris... in US currency. With planning and research I had a wonderful trip and look forward to many more. internationalfamilyportraits.com

Bandaids for Nocationers

Pam — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 08:48:08 -0500

You do have to make the best of circumstances, regardless. And to plan, plan, plan, and yes, mindful consumption is key to saving for anything, anything at all.

We were talking yesterday about how a lot of cell phone plans are equal in annual expense to a roundtrip ticket just about anywhere in the world. We could go camping for six/eight weeks on the typical annual cell phone bill. And yeah, a big trip to Target can surely dent the budget - though a run to target involves things like, oh, laundry detergent and socks and some kind of cookware that doesn't actually map to extravagent spending, it's just normal STUFF.

Because I'm a freelancer (and the primary breadwinner) sometimes there's no income - like earlier this year, for example. And during those times, we hunker down at home, we don't eat out, we don't go to the movies, and I take constant inventory of what we're spending that we could be saving. Those periods aren't staycations, we're not swanning about Seattle seeking compensatory activitives. They're not a terrible drag, I'm used to it by now, I use the time to write, experiment in my kitchen, read lots, it's fine. But it's NOT a vacation of any variety.

When you look at those who haven't ever afforded to travel, it just gets more and more annoying that marketers are trying to sell us the staycation. "Too bad you can't take the kids to Disneyland! Oh well! What if you stayed home and watched Disney movies on cable instead! On your brand new flat screen TV!"

Um, no. Was anybody paying attention to the part where we said we couldn't afford a vacation? Why do you think we can afford a new TV?

Nerd's Eye View

So Interesting

Blondie In Brazil — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 23:05:22 -0500

I think it is interesting to learn how the rising cost of things is affecting travel plans. I realize that sometimes the money simply isn't there.

However, I like what Laurie said about spending enough at Target for a plane ticket. I will cut everything short of food and internet service to travel. We stick to a tight budget - little to no eating out, very little shopping. Travel is never the first thing to go when we have cut things out due to a shortage of funds. I'll cut out all forms of entertainment just to go someplace new for a week. I just have to have travel in my life!

Blondie in Brazil

www.blondieinbrazil.blogspot.com

www.fakefoodfree.com

Great post, Pam

lauriewrites — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 22:24:38 -0500

I love to travel and this year in particular am grateful that I still have a little bit of extra cash left over to go to California for BlogHer and then to visit my sister in her new place in San Diego. And I do understand that some people are feeling the need to stay home this year...but like you, what I hate is the marketing that goes along with it. I blew enough at Target a couple of weeks ago to pay for a cheap plane ticket. It's all about mindfulness, much of the time.

And is it okay that "staycation" makes my teeth hurt? ;)

Laurie

Enjoy your time

Candelaria Silva — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 19:44:46 -0500

My sister has been a teacher for nearly 30 years and she always teaches summer school because she needs the money. Most of the women in my family are teachers and they mostly all work in the summer. I don't understand it! If I had that kind of time off (and a paycheck coming to boot) I would travel, take dance lessons, relax, garden, drown myself in good movies, books and music, etc.

Teachers need to come to the school year rested not having not had time away to just be in their own world in my opinion. Plus, every experience you have goes into your approach to teaching and increases your knowledge base.

Good and plenty!

Nocation

Candelaria Silva — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 19:17:39 -0500

I grew up in a family rich in love and poor in cash and so we had no-cations in my life. We had other ways to have fun and I was an armchair traveler.

Still am - working in non-profits and having children young meant that I didn't go on many vacations when I was i my 20 and 30s.

I do think most of us figure out a way to do the things that are truly important to us and if traveling is one of the things essential to your being, you'll find a way to do it. If traveling is just not possible because of family circumstances, then I say make an asset out of your predicament and visit those nearby places.

For me that means taking public tranportation to Gloucester and Rockport. Going to the Fuller Craft Museum in Brockton and the Peabody Essex Museum in Salem. I'm going to wear my T pass out and have fun until there is money to travel again.

Good and plenty!

Love Summer Vacation

Kalyn Denny — Sun, 15 Jun 2008 08:17:51 -0500

I guess this is my last official summer vacation, since I plan to retire from teaching after next year (30 years!) Since I've been blogging, I mostly use summer to catch up on a lot of blog-related things and house maintenance projects I can't get to during the school year. I've already cleaned out all my closets, and even actually washed my car! Between that and the vegetable garden, I'm pretty busy in the summer, but it's great to have that time to catch up!

Kalyn Denny
Kalyn's Kitchen